* Posts by Steven

77 posts • joined 9 Mar 2007

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Hubble packing shiny new camera

Steven
Thumb Up

@YEAH!

Seconded :O)

And I for one welcome our new and improved shiney orbiting overlords....

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Paris Hilton celebrates 28

Steven
Happy

God bless her...

...and all who sail in her.. ;o)

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Brit couple divorce over Sadville infidelity

Steven
Alert

Amy Taylor, 28

Yeah ok! Someone needs to add VAT to that...

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MP calls for Jezza Clarkson's head

Steven
Flame

Only...

Steve Wright was a fork lift driver.... not a lorry driver.

I believe Jezza was more likely referring to Peter Sutcliffe, still glad to see the MP in question didn't let the facts get in the way of a good rant.

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Barclaycard follows Barclays offline

Steven
Thumb Down

BC

This is precisely why when I received the letter informing me Morgan Stanley/Goldfish had been acquired by Barclaycard I rang them up and promptly cancelled my card with them.

Was perfectly happy with the service I'd received from MS up until then but having dealt with Barclays before I'd vowed that I'd never deal with any part of that organisation!

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Virgin rejects $1m space sex offer

Steven
Paris Hilton

And the film would star?

<<<< Well obviously?

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Get ready for the coming data centre crunch

Steven
Happy

@Alan

"Speaking as a contractor - this is wonderful news :)"

Amen brother :)

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LHC downed until after Xmas - Boo

Steven
Heart

Thesaurus

"would by now be spraying sub-particulate roadkill wreckage like zillionfold femto-entrail hail" - Love it :)

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Open Wi-Fi network wraps Mumbai man in bomb blast probe

Steven
Stop

Re: Seán

Please do not feed the troll....

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Jeremy Clarkson tilts at windmills

Steven
Go

@ Keith_C

That section of the A13 is actually a 40 but I take your point although I seem to recall about a year after construction was finished they still had the 30 signs up for the majority of it ;)x

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Bloke finds illegal immigrants living in loft

Steven
Go

If I'd bought the house...

... I'd be having a f**king word with the surveyor about that.

"Yes the electrics could really do with replacing but other than that the construction is sound...."

Except for the slight exception that the entire firebreak has been removed from the loft space and you've got some illegals camping in the loft!!!

lol :)

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ISS toilet fails to suck

Steven
Coat

Please use the one...

...in the Soyuz, into which we shall not pass solid's.....

The one next to the incontinence pants.

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Vatican star watcher says aliens may be out there

Steven
Happy

Well I for one...

...welcome our distant galaxy dwelling overlords / lord?!

;o)

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El Reg celebrates 10th birthday

Steven
Happy

Nice one guys 'n' gals

Good to see the faces behind ASCII characters so to speak!

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NASA gets intimate with Phobos

Steven
Alien

I for one...

...welcome our Phobos dwelling overlords.

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Document glitch sparks GTA IV ban scare

Steven
Happy

@jai

Amen brother!

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Virgin taps Boeing for 787 compensation

Steven
Alien

@amanfromMars

Bloody hell I think I understood most of that, time for a lay down....

;)

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Red Green Ken v Porsche in battle of the polls

Steven
Thumb Down

Well

No fucker asked me.

In fact I can't recall ever being asked an opinion on anything that happens in London despite being one of its residents!

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Prosecutors target first 'Facebook harassment' conviction

Steven
Coat

Are they really gone?

"Hurst and Sladden's Facebook accounts have been deleted from the site."

Deleted or deactivated? ;)

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Disintegrating wind turbine caught on camera

Steven
Thumb Up

Bloody hell!

Had never thought about what would happen to one of those if it 'ran away', definitely the right course of action for the engineers was to leg it and capture it for posterity and post it on You Tube! :)

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Redmond puts key Vista update on ice

Steven
Alert

Can you hear that?

It's the sound of a thousand Mac and *NIX fanbois stampeding towards the thread!

;)

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Israel gets kosher phone service

Steven
Joke

Do they....

...chop a small piece off the end of the phone?

Such a business!

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Transport Dept. IT: 23 years late, £100m over-budget

Steven
Flame

@Neal

Neal I think £200M is going to turn out to be chicken feed compared to the overall budget once everything is added up (not that we'd ever get given a figure that was anywhere near correct in any case, I dare say you'll end up being screwed out of more than £200M when all said and done).

What makes me laugh is that people in the rest of the UK don't want it, no fucker in London I know wants it and yet we're all collectively going to end up picking up the tab. And don't get me started about tickets, no doubt they'll all be snaffled up by the corporates and the man in the street if he's lucky will get tickets to some obscure event that nobody has heard of! So we won't even be able to go and bloody see it!!

I live and work less than 10 minutes drive from the site and short of people in the building trade in the area its of no use whatsoever to the local workforce. We've had several clients who's premises were on the site who have had compulsory puchase orders issued against them and received a fraction of the lands true worth so as we see again from this government the man in the street is the first to be bent over.

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Steven
Paris Hilton

To be fair...

...only being £100M over budget by government standards is quite good. You should wait and see how much the Olympics in 2012 is going to set us all * back.

* Of course when I say all I mean the council tax payers of London, because despite this being a HUGE benefit for the whole country (the politicians emphasis not mine) we are the only one's that get to pay for it! How lucky are we! Because its not like my wallet doesn't get raped enough by the state as it is. We'll be paying for this for the next 20+ years and for what, a overgrown sports day for 3 weeks.

PH Icon because even Paris knows, that blows.

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Spy satellite to slam Earthside

Steven
Alien

I for one..

...welcome our flaming molten beryllium, hydrazine snorting overlords

;)

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IBM hands server tech to Lenovo

Steven
Flame

I'm sorry

AC: "overpriced in comparison to Dell's"

I'm sorry? How the f*** can you compare Dell's offering to that of IBM? It's all about bang for your buck.

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100Mbit/s sewer broadband rollout coming your way

Steven
Coat

I for one..

...welcome out sewer-dwelling fibre overlords....

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Polish scientists quantify perfect legs

Steven
Happy

You just knew...

...when I checked my El' Reg RSS feed in Firefox I just knew that Mr Haines would be the author of such a fine article!!

Keep up the good work sir! Although I feel it only appropriate that on behalf of the El' Reg's readership I request that you use your powerful position in international journalism to request a similar study concentrating on Bulgarian airbags!

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Hoax: German IT boss sacks three non-smokers

Steven
Flame

Legal Action

Hope they take the guy to the cleaners!

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Office update disables MS files

Steven
Happy

Notepad

.txt files still work perfectly ;)

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MoD sorts out 'turkey' helicopters for Xmas

Steven
Flame

VFR

Exactly how the f*** can a Chinook which im assuming is laden with avionics not be capable of flying on instruments?

Or is the a case of health and safety gone mad and the MoD not 'knowing' how to certify the aircraft as I refuse to believe that Boeing would supply an army spec helicopter to any airforce that wasn't capable of flying on a cloudy day!??!

I mean christ there are flying 40+ year old gas tanks (Nimrod's) in service in a Afghanistan and nobody is concerned about them but heaven forbid our lads could get their hands on some up to date kit that doesn't have the correct paperwork, that would be far to dangerous!!

Cupid Stunts.

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Canadian cable giant slips Yahoo! name onto Google home page

Steven
Joke

Reg Standards

Surely! as! this! story! involves! Yahoo! all! words! in! the! headline! should! have! exclamation! marks! before! each! word! ?

<tongue firmly in cheek> ;o)

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'Beer Hunter' lifts 40,000 pints of Guinness

Steven
Thumb Up

Marked Up

I suspect the 46k is purely the 'cost' to Guinness of the lost beer kegs as they would sell 90 kegs for a hell of a lost more than 46 grand!!

Either way you've got to give the perps the thumbs up!

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Met Police to pilot Tasers

Steven
Flame

JCDM

This from a force, sorry "service" that capped a Brazilian lad 7 times at point blank range on a train because he looked, and I quote, “foreign”. Oh goody, just what London needs.

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New emails address you by name, then try to hose your PC

Steven
Alert

Can you hear that?

It's the sound of the Mac and Linux fanbois beating their way to the thread...

Of course the people that are likely to open these attachments are not likely to use Linux of any flavour but that won't stop the fanbois, oh no!

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Beer set to hit four quid a pint

Steven
Unhappy

Well that's that then.

Best look the bottle of turps out the garage and start claiming disability allowance in accordance with new government directives!!

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Frenchman spit-roasts 550kg camel

Steven
IT Angle

Disappointed

I was expecting some p0rn related story to unfurl there.

Mr Haines I would like to register my disgust and demand a refund on my license fee....errr...

IT angle etc etc?

;o)

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Disability law can protect alcoholic workers

Steven
Flame

Sick Note

"Sorry I've not been in work for the last week but I've been off my face after a Georgie Best style bender and have only just remembered where I live.

Oh and if you try and sack me I'll take you to a tribunal as your victimising my 'disability'."

Utter joke, who'd be an employer in the UK.

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Woman finds boyfriend dead in catflap

Steven
Paris Hilton

Darwin would be proud...

Proving once again that the lowest common denominator will always shine through!

Paris could have slid through im sure.

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Plastic police to enforce London bag ban?

Steven
Stop

Oh really.

"90 per cent of Londoners"

Nae c**t asked me!

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1and1's dedicated servers go titsup

Steven
Happy

Awww

Awwww poor Chris, have a biscuit :)

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Plan for 20mph urban speed-cam zones touted

Steven
Joke

To be honest...

...it's really just a case of natural selection. If people are stupid enough to run out in front of me I’m doing the world a favour by turning them into fender meat and I should therefore receive a discount when my road tax comes up for renewal.

I shall expedite the mater to my MP forthwith!

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Airbus delivers first A380

Steven
Thumb Up

@Joe

Ahhh thanks for clarifying that Joe, for a while I’ve been pondering what the ‘wiring issues’ were related to. I had started to think it was something to do with the ILS approach systems or something important when all along it’s just to do with the in flight entertainment systems!

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Suicide website creator arrested for murder

Steven
Paris Hilton

Yeah but....

Where's the Paris Hilton angle?

...coat already on and taxi has arrived...

;)

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Ohio docks official one week's holiday for data breach

Steven
Thumb Up

@Chris C

Common Chris don't be as slow as the guy that lost the tape!

One would assume that the bulk of the $3m would be spent on arranging credit protection facilities for those that have had their details compromised rather than just sending them a letter informing them of the incident.

Certainly I've seen other large organisations offer this service for 12-24 months after the disclosure to those affected, its the least they can do.

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Google sued for 'crimes against humanity'

Steven

LOL

55378008 Surely? :)

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Windows Server 2008 'brisket' release delayed

Steven

@Rick

Dammit man there you go starting the fanboys off again!!

The apostles of Jobs will be foaming at the mouth starring into their flaming iBook/MacBooks composing some MS bashing comments as we speak!

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Channel 4 cans Celebrity Big Brother

Steven

@ Steve

"Ms Goody famously (well, it was probably in Heat magazine) compared her vagina to said meaty snack."

A badly made one with the trimmings hanging out I would assume?

*shudder*

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Teen sticks Xbox 360 power supply in bowl of water

Steven

ROFLMAO

I'll get me coat...

(Sorry been one of those weeks)

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Travelocity accidentally books 1,458 trips between US and Cuba

Steven

Mr President el Cabron!

And which country do you think has done more than any other to keep Cuba the way it is?

Yes you guessed it, those good 'ole boys in the US of A, perhaps without 50 years of trade embargo's Cuba wouldn't be the way it is. Perhaps if the US concentrated on matters a little closer to home rather than persecuting a Caribbean island < 100 miles away the people of Cuba would have a better standard of living. And before someone trots out the Cuban missile crisis as an excuse, this all started way before that happened.

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