... Wang, I mean. Paris is OK, but I wouldn't climb over swimbo to get to her ...
1432 posts • joined 14 Nov 2007
... Wang, I mean. Paris is OK, but I wouldn't climb over swimbo to get to her ...
... the consensus here on the Reg was that the valuation was mad. Yet all the experts, KPMG and the usual suspects, and HPs own due diligence team, were sure that it was fine. More recently the commentard consensus seemed to be much more accurate than 'the professionals' re: facebook.
Amazing how the people who are paid to get it right can get it so wrong, often at so little cost to themselves personally, however much it costs their corporations.
... pretty sure you mentioned it twice.
... and write "aren't we all" on the dots for 'Other'
... fundamentally, the problem with spreadsheets is that you are trying to do matrix operations on a cell-by-cell basis. Lotus Improv had this sorted years ago. Instead of having, price in the A column, quantity in the B column and the 'C' column containing '=An*Bn', with a special case in row 1 which contains the title headings, you have columns called price, quantity and subtotal, with the single rule 'subtotal=price*quantity'.
If you want to see how a spreadsheet really should work, I exhort you to download a 30 month trial of Quantrix Modeller, the intellectual descendant of Improv, and blow your mind with it.
But it isn't just limited understanding of Excel that contributed to the financial crash. I have seen some amazingly stiff (in the technical sense) models using Monte Carlo integration (not in itself a bad thing) but which produced incredibly fragile results (where the outputs where extraordinarily, or even chaotically, sensitive to the inputs). And yes, they were used for trading decisions.
Not saying it in anyway means that the O/S provider shouldn't have had proper explorer functionality, but I get round it by keeping a copy of this handy. I think M/S and even some of the Linux Distros could learn a lot from how this great piece of Windows software works.
What on earth do the people who draw up these agreements think they're doing? They think they are our lords and masters, that's what. Do you think for a moment that we could tie CEOs to particular organisations the same way without a shitstorm about how the economy needs them to be free to move from company to company?
The fact that they realise how bad that would be for them, and indeed the very principles of free-market capitalism, means that the only explanation for them trying to bind us to our corporate masters is that they actually think they are a different class of people to us. Well, maybe they are, but probably not in the way they think they are.
Straight marriage isn't that disgusting: mixing of bodily fluids usually becomes vanishingly infrequent a few short years after the ceremony.
It's only a joke, and I actually think it's that courses, both ways round, are a good idea.
BTW I've never had to do a speed awareness course, as I prefer mpg to mph.
... for them making us do 'speed awareness' courses
... I bought a stick-type deodorant and followed the instructions: "Twist off cap and push up bottom" Walking is uncomfortable but my farts smell amazing.
Opp... Opp ... Opp
... mostly idiots?
... how about panshambles? Although I think shambles is 15c English anyway.
... except as a bowdlerism of clusterfuck
Oh no, there's gonna be a fusilli comments now.
"Office work is just about impossible under those conditions, though - guess he'll be spending a few years after school in one of the no-internet, unskilled labor professions."
I love the idea that office work is 'skilled'. I've met six people with real skills this morning that could easily survive with no internet: builder, plumber, electrician, saddler, farrier, agricultural mechanic. On the other hand a zombie apocalypse would expose me and most of my colleagues as having very few real skills.
"An idiot and his job are soon parted"
I think you'll find that only applies below 50k p.a.
... is what all the kids seem to be using. Everything else seems to have become a desert. I used to use Trillian on Android to be logged into the dozen or so IM accounts I have collected over the years, but for 2 years I only got messages via IBM Sametime (work) or Facebook. Everything else, including yahoo, google talk, and messenger, went quiet over that period.
... for the admins who plunked sensitive systems on the Internet with blank or trivial passwords.
"Gibibytes are like Mitt Romney, Red Bull, and getting your penis caught in your pants zipper - you'll never get used to it." -- David W.
I got used to it. But the Bi units are only really ever appropriate for stuff, like parallel addressed memory, where decimal units are a poor fit with reality. For serially-accessed storage, bandwidth and anything else you wish to measure, you might as well stick with the decimal (SI) definitions.
So glad someone mentioned TS2. Great music, brilliant sense of humour, huge replay value - especially with the mapmaker functionality. Every five years or so it comes out of the box for a quick run through from noob to 100%, just like every 5 years or so I have to read all of Jane Austen again --- because nothing else comes close.
Some opinions are worth more than others ...
... but that's just my opinion.
The girls on babestation used to look ok to me, especially if I'd taken my contacts out. I can't imagine too many actors are going to look great at this resolution without some serious airbrushing.
... and if you disobey you get what ... a horse's head in your bed?
BTW there is a difference between good salt and bad salt. Try a double blind test between standard table salt and something like Maldon flaked sea salt.
"apple ought to fire their lawyers over this"
Well, yes, iff the lawyers advised them that this was a good course of action, I highly doubt that, and suspect that Apple execs at some level either ignored or did not seek legal advice. IANAL but I wouldn't be surprised if you could get struck off for advising a client to behave in a manner that could be considered contempt of court.
Having grown up in Germany I'm metric through and through, but it's god-awful for cooking - grams is useless for anything but salt and spices, and kilos anything but potatoes.
I tried to lobby for a new ounce, being exactly 25g and having 20 to the new pound of exactly 0.5kg, but it never caught on :-(
... they wouldn't need to spam me all the time telling me how good they are.
Actually it's not that clear. Midnight could be - and often is - considered the end of the day: i.e. 0:00 and midnight are the same time-of-day, but 24 hours apart.
When do you think midnight on New Year's Eve is?
Where it's important for legal reasons (insurance etc.) you will usually find times such as 11:59, 23:59, 12:01 and 0:01 are used to avoid any ambiguity. Although I would personally consider 00:00 or 24:00 to be unambiguous for any given date, I'm pretty sure it would be hard to make that argument for 'midnight'.
The girl next door to me reflects EM in about the 400-700nm range, and it certainly has physiological effects.
"Personally, I think that parents describing their spoiled brats bullying, destrictive, selfish behaviour to other parents as, "Oh, he's on the spectrum," and not being a proper parent,"
heyrick: "Once upon a time, saying "Oh, he's on the spectrum" meant something completely different."
Not necessarily completely different :-)
>> Quoting Steve Jobs (1994): "Good artists copy great artists steal" ...
Attributed to Stravinsky. Or Picasso. Or TS Eliot. Probably predates any of them.
However - certainly not original by Steve Jobs.
Apologies if you've heard it ...
an iPhone 5 user walks into a bar ... or a hotel, or maybe a church.
Can't believe how many comments I had to read before someone pointed that out. I was going to post the same if I got to the end of the comments without it being raised, and I'd almost given up hope.
Poe's Law in action?
"At what point are journalists and analysts going to face the fact that 99% of fondleslabs are being used by people playing Angry Birds ..."
Actually, that makes me wonder. Maybe it's because the work of journalists and analysts CAN be done on fondleslabs that they struggle to imagine the kind of work that can't be. Their offices probably ARE the "beanbag clad open plan 'thinking spaces'" that Tim 11 so amusingly brings to mind.
... the USA could clearly use a patent system more like ours. So it's totally going to happen that way round.
... what happens when there are too many different domains and subdomains. A particularly egregious case is that some noob registered National Schools Film Week at nsfw.org whereas nsfw.com is a well known porn site.
You can argue (and I would) that the person responsible for this error should be given a stiff talking to. But the more different options there are, the worse the situation becomes. The problem is, we need Nominet and their ilk to be motivated to rationalise and improve for the sake of the internet users, but they seem to have all become vehicles for enriching their staff.
Record the 'di dah dee' number disconnected tone on your voicemail. This causes a lot of diallers to hang up. Your friends and family will get used to waiting through the beeps and you can just pick it up later.
I have a phone with a VIP feature, where someone can enter a code and it cuts out of the voicemail back to the phone. The normal ring is set to zero volume, and the VIP ring is as normal. The message says that if you are a friend, colleague or relative, you can enter the VIP code. If you don't know it, you can hold on and this message will tell you. However, using the code if you are not a colleague, friend or relative is an offence under the Computer Misuse Act ...
Most uninvited callers hang up at that point.
Then it tells the caller what the code is. I noticed that some callers or machines are resolutely determined to hold on till the call is answered or a voicemail beep is heard. So I play them several more minutes of music, and then sorry, sorry voicemail is full, and the line is dropped.
Whatever you call the protagonists, characterising one as a 'sender' and one as a 'receiver' is not, AFAICS, useful for 99% of crytographic communication, which consists of the establishment of a secure bidirectional channel. Alice might contact Bob, but that implies to me that she is the initiator of a secure duplex conversation, not a sender of a message that the receiver might not acknowledge, or that he might acknowledge in the clear.
"That's it, I'm done..."
Don't let the door hit you on the way out.
"A cryptographic hash algorithm converts data into a shortened "message digest" from which it is, ideally, impossible to recover the original information. "
Any decent cryptographic function can be described by the last part of this sentence, whereas cryptographic has algorithms are a special class of these. Can I suggest
"A cryptographic hash algorithm converts data into a shortened "message digest" such that it is not only extremely unlikely that different data will have identical digests, but that it would be computationally infeasible to create data that would yield some given digest.
... or he'd remember this:
"Glass crystallizes. It's called "devitrification" It's commonly seen in obsidian which is volcanic glass. Or to put it another way, it just wants to be a crystal again. Glass is a metastable state."
Did you really think that was something these researchers didn't know?
find | grep. Works on Windows 7 as well - you just need to install the GNU UnxUtils. This is the sort of thing that all UNIXes have done really well since pretty much forever.
If $85k is what they are offering as 'aggressive recruitment' it's surprising the people they had before were capable of creating any good software ... oh, wait ...