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* Posts by John H Woods

1375 posts • joined 14 Nov 2007

eBay hit with antitrust suit over hiring practices

John H Woods
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Pseudofeudalism

What on earth do the people who draw up these agreements think they're doing? They think they are our lords and masters, that's what. Do you think for a moment that we could tie CEOs to particular organisations the same way without a shitstorm about how the economy needs them to be free to move from company to company?

The fact that they realise how bad that would be for them, and indeed the very principles of free-market capitalism, means that the only explanation for them trying to bind us to our corporate masters is that they actually think they are a different class of people to us. Well, maybe they are, but probably not in the way they think they are.

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Boss wrong to demote man over anti-gay-marriage Facebook post

John H Woods
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Re: I dont know what is more disgusting

Straight marriage isn't that disgusting: mixing of bodily fluids usually becomes vanishingly infrequent a few short years after the ceremony.

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'Spend police USB stick data loss mega-fine on IT lessons for cops'

John H Woods
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Re: Sounds like revenge...

@John Robson,

It's only a joke, and I actually think it's that courses, both ways round, are a good idea.

BTW I've never had to do a speed awareness course, as I prefer mpg to mph.

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John H Woods
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Sounds like revenge...

... for them making us do 'speed awareness' courses

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Fart-buster underpants selling well among Japanese salarymen

John H Woods
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That reminds me...

... I bought a stick-type deodorant and followed the instructions: "Twist off cap and push up bottom" Walking is uncomfortable but my farts smell amazing.

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Apple to settle with Samsung? Korean honcho: 'Fuggedaboutit'

John H Woods
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Re: Personally

Opp... Opp ... Opp

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Humans becoming steadily STUPIDER, says brainiac boffin

John H Woods
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Weren't the ancient Greeks ...

... mostly idiots?

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Omnishambles beats off mummy-porn, becomes English word of 2012

John H Woods
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Try Greek rather than Latin...

... how about panshambles? Although I think shambles is 15c English anyway.

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John H Woods
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Unecessary ...

... except as a bowdlerism of clusterfuck

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Apple-v-Samsung $1bn iPhone fine: 'Jury foreman was biased'

John H Woods
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Re: Well that and...

Oh no, there's gonna be a fusilli comments now.

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Hacker sentenced to six years – WITH NO INTERNET

John H Woods
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Errmm...

"Office work is just about impossible under those conditions, though - guess he'll be spending a few years after school in one of the no-internet, unskilled labor professions."

I love the idea that office work is 'skilled'. I've met six people with real skills this morning that could easily survive with no internet: builder, plumber, electrician, saddler, farrier, agricultural mechanic. On the other hand a zombie apocalypse would expose me and most of my colleagues as having very few real skills.

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Walmart workers filmed playing iPad frisbee

John H Woods
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Re: As they say...

"An idiot and his job are soon parted"

I think you'll find that only applies below 50k p.a.

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Microsoft and Skype to axe world's most popular IM client early 2013

John H Woods
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KIK...

... is what all the kids seem to be using. Everything else seems to have become a desert. I used to use Trillian on Android to be logged into the dozen or so IM accounts I have collected over the years, but for 2 years I only got messages via IBM Sametime (work) or Facebook. Everything else, including yahoo, google talk, and messenger, went quiet over that period.

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UK prosecutors, cops ponder new probe into NASA hacker McKinnon

John H Woods
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Criminal prosecution still required ...

... for the admins who plunked sensitive systems on the Internet with blank or trivial passwords.

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Microsoft's 32GB Surface RT has 16GB of free storage

John H Woods
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Re: I swear to god...

"Gibibytes are like Mitt Romney, Red Bull, and getting your penis caught in your pants zipper - you'll never get used to it." -- David W.

I got used to it. But the Bi units are only really ever appropriate for stuff, like parallel addressed memory, where decimal units are a poor fit with reality. For serially-accessed storage, bandwidth and anything else you wish to measure, you might as well stick with the decimal (SI) definitions.

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Slideshow: A History of First-person Shooters in 20 Games

John H Woods
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Re: And TimeSplitters too!

So glad someone mentioned TS2. Great music, brilliant sense of humour, huge replay value - especially with the mapmaker functionality. Every five years or so it comes out of the box for a quick run through from noob to 100%, just like every 5 years or so I have to read all of Jane Austen again --- because nothing else comes close.

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KDE 'annoys the hell of' Linus Torvalds

John H Woods
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Happy

Re: Opinions are like...

Some opinions are worth more than others ...

... but that's just my opinion.

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Sony KD-84X9005 84in ultra-HD TV review

John H Woods
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I regret the move to HD...

The girls on babestation used to look ok to me, especially if I'd taken my contacts out. I can't imagine too many actors are going to look great at this resolution without some serious airbrushing.

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Debenhams cafes ban outré terms like 'espresso' and 'cappuccino'

John H Woods
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Insult to her culture...

... and if you disobey you get what ... a horse's head in your bed?

BTW there is a difference between good salt and bad salt. Try a double blind test between standard table salt and something like Maldon flaked sea salt.

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Apple must apologise for its surly apology on its website on Saturday

John H Woods
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Re: now that i've quit smoking

"apple ought to fire their lawyers over this"

Well, yes, iff the lawyers advised them that this was a good course of action, I highly doubt that, and suspect that Apple execs at some level either ignored or did not seek legal advice. IANAL but I wouldn't be surprised if you could get struck off for advising a client to behave in a manner that could be considered contempt of court.

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Pints all round as Register Special Projects hacks hack off feet

John H Woods
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Unhappy

I miss the ounce...

Having grown up in Germany I'm metric through and through, but it's god-awful for cooking - grams is useless for anything but salt and spices, and kilos anything but potatoes.

I tried to lobby for a new ounce, being exactly 25g and having 20 to the new pound of exactly 0.5kg, but it never caught on :-(

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Google releases 'Disavow links' tool to fix SEO spam

John H Woods
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If these SEO outfits were any good ...

... they wouldn't need to spam me all the time telling me how good they are.

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It's official: Apple will reveal 'a little more' on October 23

John H Woods
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Re: Midnight

Actually it's not that clear. Midnight could be - and often is - considered the end of the day: i.e. 0:00 and midnight are the same time-of-day, but 24 hours apart.

When do you think midnight on New Year's Eve is?

Where it's important for legal reasons (insurance etc.) you will usually find times such as 11:59, 23:59, 12:01 and 0:01 are used to avoid any ambiguity. Although I would personally consider 00:00 or 24:00 to be unambiguous for any given date, I'm pretty sure it would be hard to make that argument for 'midnight'.

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'Hypersensitive' Wi-Fi hater loses case against fiendish DEVICES

John H Woods
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Re: me too

The girl next door to me reflects EM in about the 400-700nm range, and it certainly has physiological effects.

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McKinnon will not be extradited to the US, says Home Secretary

John H Woods
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Happy

Re: Hoorah!

"Personally, I think that parents describing their spoiled brats bullying, destrictive, selfish behaviour to other parents as, "Oh, he's on the spectrum," and not being a proper parent,"

heyrick: "Once upon a time, saying "Oh, he's on the spectrum" meant something completely different."

Not necessarily completely different :-)

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Apple pays up for stealing design from Swiss Railways

John H Woods
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@Erwin Hofmann

>> Quoting Steve Jobs (1994): "Good artists copy great artists steal" ...

Attributed to Stravinsky. Or Picasso. Or TS Eliot. Probably predates any of them.

However - certainly not original by Steve Jobs.

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'X Factor for tech is going to be OUTTA THIS WORLD'

John H Woods
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Apple maps and general vicinities ...

Apologies if you've heard it ...

an iPhone 5 user walks into a bar ... or a hotel, or maybe a church.

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Ubuntu 12.10: More to Um Bongo Linux than Amazon ads

John H Woods
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Re: The Logic Of Advertising

Can't believe how many comments I had to read before someone pointed that out. I was going to post the same if I got to the end of the comments without it being raised, and I'd almost given up hope.

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WTF is... VoLTE

John H Woods
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Re: Erm, like, who cares???

Poe's Law in action?

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OK - who just bought a biz PC? Oh wait, none of you did

John H Woods
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Happy

@Tim Almond

"At what point are journalists and analysts going to face the fact that 99% of fondleslabs are being used by people playing Angry Birds ..."

Actually, that makes me wonder. Maybe it's because the work of journalists and analysts CAN be done on fondleslabs that they struggle to imagine the kind of work that can't be. Their offices probably ARE the "beanbag clad open plan 'thinking spaces'" that Tim 11 so amusingly brings to mind.

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EU, US edge closer to mega-transatlantic patent system

John H Woods
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Well...

... the USA could clearly use a patent system more like ours. So it's totally going to happen that way round.

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Nominet mulls killing off the .co from .co.uk

John H Woods
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I can't resist pointing out ...

... what happens when there are too many different domains and subdomains. A particularly egregious case is that some noob registered National Schools Film Week at nsfw.org whereas nsfw.com is a well known porn site.

You can argue (and I would) that the person responsible for this error should be given a stiff talking to. But the more different options there are, the worse the situation becomes. The problem is, we need Nominet and their ilk to be motivated to rationalise and improve for the sake of the internet users, but they seem to have all become vehicles for enriching their staff.

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Pair face £250k fines for spamming mobes with millions of texts

John H Woods
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Re: And landlines !

Record the 'di dah dee' number disconnected tone on your voicemail. This causes a lot of diallers to hang up. Your friends and family will get used to waiting through the beeps and you can just pick it up later.

I have a phone with a VIP feature, where someone can enter a code and it cuts out of the voicemail back to the phone. The normal ring is set to zero volume, and the VIP ring is as normal. The message says that if you are a friend, colleague or relative, you can enter the VIP code. If you don't know it, you can hold on and this message will tell you. However, using the code if you are not a colleague, friend or relative is an offence under the Computer Misuse Act ...

Most uninvited callers hang up at that point.

Then it tells the caller what the code is. I noticed that some callers or machines are resolutely determined to hold on till the call is answered or a voicemail beep is heard. So I play them several more minutes of music, and then sorry, sorry voicemail is full, and the line is dropped.

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'Replace crypto-couple Alice and Bob with Sita and Rama'

John H Woods
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Sender and Receiver...?

Whatever you call the protagonists, characterising one as a 'sender' and one as a 'receiver' is not, AFAICS, useful for 99% of crytographic communication, which consists of the establishment of a secure bidirectional channel. Alice might contact Bob, but that implies to me that she is the initiator of a secure duplex conversation, not a sender of a message that the receiver might not acknowledge, or that he might acknowledge in the clear.

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McFlurry McMisdemeanour costs Welsh lass McJob

John H Woods
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Re: That's it, I'm done...

"That's it, I'm done..."

Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

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SHA-3 hash finalist Schneier calls for halt in crypto contest

John H Woods
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Clarification

"A cryptographic hash algorithm converts data into a shortened "message digest" from which it is, ideally, impossible to recover the original information. "

Any decent cryptographic function can be described by the last part of this sentence, whereas cryptographic has algorithms are a special class of these. Can I suggest

"A cryptographic hash algorithm converts data into a shortened "message digest" such that it is not only extremely unlikely that different data will have identical digests, but that it would be computationally infeasible to create data that would yield some given digest.

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Brave copper single-handedly chases 'suspicious' Moon

John H Woods
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Hasn't been on the force long...

... or he'd remember this:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/7489457.stm

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Hitachi claims glass data storage will last millions of years

John H Woods
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Re: Won't last 100's of millions of years

"Glass crystallizes. It's called "devitrification" It's commonly seen in obsidian which is volcanic glass. Or to put it another way, it just wants to be a crystal again. Glass is a metastable state."

*jaw drops*

Did you really think that was something these researchers didn't know?

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'Your app will work on Windows 8 - but please rewrite it anyway'

John H Woods
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need to avoid daft statements

find | grep. Works on Windows 7 as well - you just need to install the GNU UnxUtils. This is the sort of thing that all UNIXes have done really well since pretty much forever.

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Apple begs ex-Google bods to fix crap maps app

John H Woods
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The problem is ALWAYS the PEOPLE.

If $85k is what they are offering as 'aggressive recruitment' it's surprising the people they had before were capable of creating any good software ... oh, wait ...

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Toshiba AT300 10in Android tablet review

John H Woods
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Re: er,

The LCD screen is slightly inferior to the latest IPS panels in terms of brightness, viewing angles and richness of colour. However, the display is certainly not what you could call poor, and it compares favourably with the Nexus 7.

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Peeved bumpkins demand legally binding broadband promise from UK.gov

John H Woods
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Re: Move House

Sorry Tim, but that's absolute bull. Although I don't want to live in a major conurbation I, like a lot of people in my village, could not afford to even if I wanted to. Sure the Cotswolds etc are full of people who work in London, etc, but there's a lot more 'country' than you seem to realize.

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The Register lands in Australia

John H Woods
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Re: Antipodean name

The Great Galah?

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Space shuttle to slip surly bonds of Earth one last time over California

John H Woods
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Re: Indeed a title

@SirDigalot

Can I recommend you try a bit harder to see a launch, you won't regret it. In 2010 I took the kids out of school in the UK (ignoring the idiotic tutting of a few of the teachers, although to be fair most were supportive) to travel to Florida to see STS-130 launch the Cupola - I think the last piece of the ISS.

It was the last scheduled night-time Shuttle launch (although I think some later launches may have slipped to night-time, not sure) and it was ABSOLUTELY SPECTACULAR -- from SIX MILES AWAY! My kids, then 15,14 and 12 still have shiny eyes whenever they tell anyone about it, and we are talking about teenagers whose first priority is to look cool.

A couple of days later we say the SDO launched in the daytime atop an Atlas V. I will never forget seeing the sonic boom ripple through a clear blue sky like ripples on a pond - amazing.

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Shuttle Endeavour buzzes the Golden Gate Bridge

John H Woods
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Re: @Herby

@ian22

I don't think apologist means what you think it means.

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