693 posts • joined Monday 5th November 2007 10:17 GMT
Re: what's the fuss?
The culture that gave the world the Catholic Church has no business lecturing anyone on a "bizarre blind spot for paedophilia".
I've heard of not knowing your arse from your elbow, but not being able to distinguish a girl's arse from her legs is a whole new level of weirdness.
Ok, I suppose the bend of her legs makes them look a bit like a pair of buttocks if you squint - but come on, really.
As others have pointed out, the problem is that Doctor Who is fundamentally non-violent, and unimaginative designers think that computer games have to include laser guns.
They should make a Doctor Who game along the lines of the Amnesia games. They showed that you can have a good game where the protagonist is unarmed. A Machine For Pigs in particular is very like a Doctor Who episode - you run round an oppressive futuristic building, fleeing hideous monsters, gradually discover the monstrous purpose of the whole thing, and progress by fiddling with / breaking machinery.
Replace Amnesia's monsters with Daleks, Cybermen or, god forbid, Weeping Angels and I think there's a pretty good game in there. And of course you'd have that 'hide-behind-the-sofa' terror that everyone associates with Doctor Who.
Re: I've got a little list.
Assuming you're referring to the Big Four accountancy firms, it's PwC, Deloitte, KPMG and Ernst & Young. Goldman Sachs is an investment bank.
"University (or a big chunk of it) is nothing more than an industry predicated on the dodgy suggestion that if you borrow obscene amounts of money to attend the University of Spleen for 3 years to study universitology or whatever, that you will reap untold riches, which will make the obscene cost, the delay in actually working, and the extra damage to your liver all worth it."
Would you like to join our PR department?
Re: so what is the correct pronunciation?
The correct pronunciation is Ñian-Ñian. The 'n' sounds a bit like the first 'n' in the Spanish 'mañana'. And as said above, each 'nyan' is one syllable, not two. And it should rhyme with 'yarn-yarn' (appropriately enough), not 'can-can'.
Obviously, neither 'nyan' nor 'meow' sounds anything like a cat noise, anymore than a cat talking to you sounds like English. James Joyce's "Mrkgnao" is as good an onomatopoeia as any.
I don't see anything wrong with Messiah, it sounds like a perfectly normal African name. Though it's not as good a name as Goodluck Jonathan (president of Nigeria) or Two-Boys Gumede (South African footballer, so named because he was a second son).
Re: so... surely there must also be the opposite ?
Nominative antideterminism happens in cats too.
Many years ago we named our new kittens 'Bubble' and 'Squeak'. After about a week it became apparent that we'd named the fat one Squeak and the noisy one Bubble, so we swapped them over.
Re: Unwarranted conclusion
"If you want your opinion to be taken as fact, attribute it to a great figure from history."
Re: Fundamental flaws
I hope they don't pay you too much :):):)
I'm not sure that Marx specifically discussed the problem of consumers overpaying for something because they mistook it for something else. This is no more significant than someone mistaking lamb for beef.
If you are claiming that equity 'does not exist' then you are just talking nonsense. Equity is no more unreal than the money in your bank account or the pint you owe your mate. And certainly Marx claimed no such thing.
Like any charity that employs more than, say, 50 people then. I thought it was pretty obvious that Moiety was talking about national and supranational 'third sector' 'charities' of the likes of Oxfam, RSPCA, Greenpeace etc, not proper local charities.
Re: A watched a TV program where...
Wouldn't recommend trying this. And not just because it's wrong to steal, obviously.
I was wondering why the staff at my Sainsburys had stopped coming over as soon as they heard the machine say 'approval needed', and started doing it at the end instead. (It annoyed me slightly because it meant having to catch their attention.) Fairly obvious now I think about it - it lets them check that the list of restricted items that flashes up on the screen matches what's in my bag.
Re: Too slow!
Multi buy discounts: it will actually discount them when you select the payment option (i.e. press 'card' or 'cash'), you don't need to go back and then go back in again. (I also used to go back twice - it's not the best design.)
Quicker to go through a manned till - well, obviously, that's not the point. The point is that it's quicker to get TO a self-service checkout - they can fit more of them in and the queues are much shorter.
Ah, an article about automated checkouts. The "Hey guys, what is UP with airline food?" de nos jours.
Strange, I thought this was El Reg, not Saga magazine or the Mendips Journal. All the article was missing was something about it being "a wry look" in the subheading.
Re: Green fatigue
Fracking can can cause the tortoises holding up the earth to lose their balance, which can cause the earth to shake, which might make Atlas drop the sky, causing it to fall on our heads. Simples.
""We've designed house party invitations specifically to be a friendly social affair where players can visit each other's pads without fear of having them ruined or losing their hard-earned vehicles in the process"
Sounds mind-numbingly boring.
Did anyone ever play the original top-down GTA online? I think you could only do it on a LAN. But it was great. You found a machinegun, drove to where everyone else was, and rammed the pile-up at top speed, splattering anyone who was on foot. Once you got stuck in the wreckage of everyone else's cars you were a sitting duck, so you got out and opened fire on whoever you failed to run over. Then someone else would enter the scene and run you over. Then you would respawn, drive back and run them over. Repeat ad infinitum. After a few minutes you had a growing pile of wreckage and a continual rolling shootout with players driving in from all directions. Simple, repetitive and hilarious.
The sort of fun you just can't get nowadays with designed-to-death games like GTA V.
Re: Let me get this straight...
I haven't played GTA5 yet, but Bioshock Infinite was a bloody excellent game, fully deserving of five stars. It has some of the most enjoyable gameplay mechanics of any game I've played for years, while still being challenging. The GTA games are at their hearts fairly basic and often tedious shooting / driving games, raised to a much higher level by their writing and satire.
(By basic I mean the central gameplay mechanic, not the open world. In GTA3 it was stand in the open and mow everyone down, in GTA4 it was upgraded to hide behind something and mow everyone down.)
Lack of replayability does not detract from a game if it's good enough the first time round. You don't generally judge films by how good they are the second time - a few you do, but most you don't.
"So the best selling point of a iPhone is when it breaks you can get a replacement the same day if you live near an apple shop?"
If it hasn't burnt your house down.
Also, in case no-one's said it already, the two extra clicks required to add an icon now are bloody stupid and completely pointless.
Can people stop saying "it's against the law" as if it means 3 are automatically in the wrong.
It's quite clear that it's a daft, unenforceable law, like most laws that end in "2008" or any other number associated with the Blair regime. How do you prove that the company was deliberately engaged in a bait-and-switch, and not just engaging in perfectly normal selling practices? I am a salesman, you have rung the sales line, my job is to sell you something. If I haven't got what you want then I am practically obliged to earn my salary by saying "what about this"?
It is only a bait-and-switch if 3 never had any of the advertised product in the first place. I can't see that ever being proved in court.
Re: I would have been very surprised if either company had objected.
Maybe Google should just go the whole hog and call it the Android KitKat Badger Cull Tuition Fees 10am Lecture just to *really* annoy the second-year PPE NUS-candidate wankers.
Out of curiousity I looked it up. It sounds rubbish. I am basing that solely on the Wikipedia synopsis which indicates that it a) has no ending and b) uses the Blair Witch "found footage" device, but that is a pretty foolproof indication of crap. I get the sense that the positive comments were due to lowered expectations.
Re: death and taxes
1) Derivatives have their own risks. With derivatives not backed by physical assets, it is basically a loan to the bank, and if the bank goes bust you lose the lot. Even with a physically-backed derivative where the bank has gold in a vault to support the derivative, you are still relying on the fact that the bank has enough gold for everyone if they go tits-up.
Obviously keeping it in your home has its own risks, but it's a perfectly reasonable preference.
2) I'm guessing she was too cheap. But then again, if it's insured, what's the difference (assuming you eventually get the insurer to pay out)? Apart from the risk of armed robbery.
3) She was in love? I know, some people eh.
"I realise the case is between her and the insurer, but she could equally well go after her (I assume ex) boyfriend and his cronies to recover the amount, if he has the funds to cough up."
That's not her job. She paid premiums to an insurer, and that makes recovering the money from the criminal their problem.
But yes, I understand why the insurer thinks she might have been in on it. That's why we have courts, to prove it one way or the other.
Re: "... as simple as DNS nobbling ..."
"Porn videos should be pretty easy to tell apart. Lots of boring, rhytmic to-and-fro movement, lots of fleshtone areas, very little dialogue."
How would you stop it blocking boxing videos?
Re: Pump and dump?
Makes sense. I mean, one is an amoralistic echo chamber constantly pumping out reams of vacuous bullshit and known mostly for witch-hunts, and the other is a social networking website.
To be honest I'm not sure which way round I should have written that joke.
"I've always wondered why God would want people grovelling around and singing dreary songs at him all the time."
Because he made man in God's image and that particular man happens to be Kim Jong Un?
I can never understand where this idea comes from that if God exists, he must be benevolent and/or rational.
People don't point out errors in the comments because they want to see the article corrected, they do it to show off their superior knowledge :-). Particularly when it comes to historical errors of the "That wasn't the first [whatever], it was 3D Space Blargle on the Tincan 2k Micro in 1977" variety.
Especially with the tendency of journalists (not necessarily El Reg ones) to correct the original article without any acknowledgement that there was an error in the original, which means that all comments on the error subsequently look daft.
Re: Currency value fluctuations
Never mind turning into half a pint, what about suddenly turning into twenty pints of bitcoin beer when you're stood behind the local skinhead Millwall supporter, with explosive results...
(I know 20x increases in value happened years ago, before the founders cashed out and ran, obviously.)
"This is outrageous. It is not business of government to tell people what is true and what is not (especially that they produce a mountain of idiotism every day)."
Wrong. Either you haven't thought that statement through, or you believe there should be no laws against fraud.
If I try to pass-off second-hand cars as new, is it the business of government to tell people that I'm cheating them? Yes. And if I tell people I can speak to their dead granny, is it still the business of government to tell people I can't? Again yes.
"Oh, pardon me while I split my sides laughing. That one never gets old."
That's because it makes sure to take its special homeopathic remedy to prevent jokes getting tired - write 'My dog's got no nose' on a piece of paper, grind into dust, dilute a billion times and drink.
And if it ever does get old and dies on its arse, who cares? We can just get a medium to call it up from the spirit world.
I was about to say 'no it isn't', but you might be right. Does anyone know what exactly would be the difference between an establishmentarianism and an antidisestablishmentarianism?
Put another way, if you're at a meeting to discuss how to preserve the link between the Church of England and the monarchy, and someone walks in saying "Hi, I'm an establishmentarianism", why would you throw him out?
You always chuck something in about the Third World when you're doing some sort of food science and looking for publicity / cash.
He's actually a bit out of date, he should have said something about how the more efficient use of agricultural land will prevent global warming.
It will be one of:
whether you like it or not.
And jumping on the Tardis' sofa. Actually, Matt Smith does sometimes remind me of the bonkers Scientology Tom Cruise when he's off on one of his irritatingly twee "Humans are brilliant!" moments.
Have you ever seen an EDL member? Most could be quickly pacified with a mildly energetic game of dominoes, let alone a game that involves running around.
Re: Search for which morons or morons your morons liked!
"I'd rather not waste two hours watching The Texan Chainsaw Massacre remake when ALL signs are that it is complete shit."
It's a remake of The Texan Chainsaw Massacre, what did you expect?
In fact, never mind the remake, the name of the film is "Texas Chainsaw Massacre". Were you expecting Citizen Kane?
Re: "and if I swallow anything evil, put your finger down my throat..."
Bring back the tunnels that you use to exit sports stadia? I didn't know they'd been banned. Is that why football fans are always so angry - because they can't get out?
So you could have bought it online but because you needed it now it cost double the price? That is, in some respects, neither unusual nor immoral. If I haven't bothered to make sandwiches yesterday, then I will need to pay double for a pair from the shop what I could have paid for the ingredients. And they won't taste as nice or be as filling either.
Obviously the problem Comet couldn't survive just on the minority who need something urgently.
Also, you could have saved money by telling your son it won't kill him to play outside for a few days.
Re: High as a kite
You refer to that article and don't quote the bit where he discusses shoving 'bath salts' up your arse to induce 'hypersexual behaviour'?
Personally I can't think of anything more likely to turn on a woman than a man with dyed hair and moustache emerging from the jungle of Belize brandishing guns and foaming at the mouth and rectum. It all sounds like some sort of twisted Lynx advert.
It's probably not a bad job, it's just that nobody played as the male Shepard so nobody knows what he looks like.
(For those unfamiliar with the game, it's not a transvestite fantasy thing; the voice actress who played the female Shepard is much better than the bland male one. I remember PC Gamer highlighting this in its review and I'm fairly sure it wasn't the only one.)
If I was a creative type making an advert for Grand Theft Auto 4, what I would do is have Surly Moustachovic carjacking a Toyota, which then transports him into the real world, where he drives around sensibly for a while observing the speed limit and stopping at traffic lights. It would have made the game look much more fun than it actually was.
Given the insultingly infantilistic way they've started addressing their customers (that "Your thumb goes from here... to here" ad) I expect the revised apology to go something like "Judge said we done bad thing. We sorry we done bad thing. Samsung not actually do what we done. GOO GOO GA GA PLEBS."
Not very effective advertising
Wikipedia is my browser home page and I read the DYKs every morning over breakfast. It's usually the most interesting section.
If you had asked me "guess who's spamming DYK with excessive articles?" I would not have said Gibraltar - I would have immediately said the Indonesian Classic Film Society. Because there's something about an Indonesian / Dutch East Indian film or actor every day it seems. There's nothing sinister about this - it means that someone who's interested in Indoniesian film is doing a lot of article expansion and making regular submissions to DYK. Before Indonesian film it was Eurovision Song Contest entrants.
If Gibraltar are paying someone to promote the country via DYK, they should stop, not because it breaks the rules but because they're doing a rubbish job. I've noticed several trends over the years including the two above, and I haven't noticed Gibraltar items at all. Let alone been tempted to visit. 17 articles in a month occupies a tiny amount of space - DYK generally changes all its articles four times a day, meaning each item will last only 6 hours before disappearing forever, and there can be anything from 6-8 articles in each batch. So 17 out of 700-900 articles. Not very effective.
Re: Beginning of the end for the BBC?
"The BBC no longer properly act as the guardian of our culture and language (listen for a minute to their journalists consistently mispronouncing common English words and to their poor syntax),"
Can I just offer my compliments for your use of irony there, complaining about the BBC being unable to use language properly when your username refers to a Fast Show sketch whose premise was "Spanish people talk funny".
Re: Race to the Bottom
"You either have a very short or selective memory: Nick Davies in The Guardian broke the details on the bubbling-under phone hacking scandal that eventually brought down a certain newspaper."
And? One, everyone who reads Private Eye knew that phone-hacking was standard practice in UK newspapers already. We can thank Nick Davies for the juicy details which got everyone all outraged - dead schoolgirls, JK Rowling, etc - but not for revealing the actual practice, which was already public knowledge for anyone who bothered to take an interest.
Two, it was all very fascinating but had no significant effect. Watergate didn't inspire a cliché because it turned out that a politician lied, it was significant because it forced the President's resignation and altered the course of history. So what did Phonegate achieve? News International got to slim down its workforce early and bring forward the long-planned merger of the NotW with the Sun. Murdoch senior and junior had to go and kow-tow to the local parasites. We got to watch Mrs Murdoch karate-kick a pie-thrower in the face. Who cares? Journalists bribing plod for info was the only element of real public interest, but it's plod - nothing has been and nothing will be done, just like the current Hillsborough and Rotheram scandals.
It provided good fodder for newspapers and water-cooler chat, but there was no significant public benefit - and therefore no justification for an ongoing subsidy.
Evacuation of Dunkirk?
The beauty of this is that you can basically predict whatever you like. The tournament's only run once, there's only one winner, and they only play at most six of the other fifteen teams. You can't run it a hundred times to see if the percentages are correct. Even if Spain go out in the group stage, it doesn't mean the 12% figure was wrong.
No-one will ever know whether Spain had a 12% chance of winning, a 24% chance of winning or a 6% chance of winning. (How do we know there isn't a 50% chance that the tension between the Barca and Madrid camps will escalate into an all-out punchup, leading to an ignominous exit in nearly all those universes?) It's a theory you can't possibly disprove. And therefore, worthless.
That aside, "The model only uses the results of previous International games, the number of goals scored, and location of game." In other words, the fact that England's only international-class creative player is banned for the first two group matches, and they could be out before he gets a chance to play, hasn't been taken into account in ranking them third? Whoops. I know you can't include everything in a model, but if you can't include something like this, then don't bother.
Is it possible that the reason no-one is launching an anti-trust suit to prevent Facebook gobbling up the crap-photo-sharing market, is because nobody cares about the crap-photo-sharing market? I'd never heard of Instagram before it appeared in the mainstream news media and The Reg because Facebook thought it was worth '$1bn' of unsellable paper. Microsoft's attempt to create a monopoly, on the other hand, affected nearly everybody in the developed world. So does Google's (only now you can delete 'developed'). As far as I can see, this only affects amateur photographers. (Don't quote Niemöller, please, there is nothing in this case that prevents anti-trust authorities from acting later if Facebook tries to dominate a more far-reaching market.)
Perhaps anti-trust authorities *should* intervene, but it is perfectly understandable why they aren't.
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