* Posts by Tim Jenkins

375 posts • joined 30 Oct 2007

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Assange will 'accept arrest' on Friday if found guilty

Tim Jenkins

Re: What are the odds looking like?

Wonder what odds I could get on him departing via glider off the roof.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colditz_Cock

(which could also be his new nickname...)

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Research: By 2017, a third of home Wi-Fi routers will power passers-by

Tim Jenkins

Re: Leeches

I think the deal is that if you opt-out your own router from providing BT Wifi (which you have to do through your BT online account management, rather than on the router as used to be possible), you lose the credentials to use all the other BT homehubs which have their BTWifi SSIDs switched on by default (5 million+, they claim).

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Major Hollywood studio eyes Paint Drying sequel

Tim Jenkins

Basil Brush

is unfortunately unavailable; apparently the Yewtree chaps are interested in having a chat with him about his post-television career teaching English to orphaned kittens in Thailand...

Boom, and indeed, boom.

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Land Rover Defender dies: Production finally halted by EU rules

Tim Jenkins

Many happy hours on long journeys

spent poking things through the vent flaps and machinegunning oncoming cars.

These days there's probably an app for that.

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999 What's your emergency: Mega millions Met call handling IT muckup?

Tim Jenkins

Mind you, being able to summon up an F16 or B2 in response to a 999 call would bring a whole new angle to the concept of 'high impact' policing...

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PDF redaction is hard, NSW Medical Council finds out - the hard way

Tim Jenkins

Re: Yet another way to get it wrong...

I once had to point out to a senior member of university staff that removing the identity of a student from the body of a 'sensitive' document didn't entirely prevent said individual from being identified if the footer showed a file path ending in a folder that was labelled with the students name...

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BBC risks wrath of android rights activists with Robot Wars reboot

Tim Jenkins

Re: One man and his dog

Or when researching the nocturnal visual capabilities of medium-sized domesticated mammals: 'do goats see in the dark?'

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Lower video resolution can deliver better quality, says Netflix

Tim Jenkins

...scenes with fast-moving objects, quick scene changes, explosions and water splashes...

Every Pirates of the Caribbean outing, best watched at a resolution of anything you like, provided all the pixels are permanently set to #000000.

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New gear needed to capture net connection records, say ISPs

Tim Jenkins

"...costs of... ...making it available when plod wants to snoop through it...".

Much cheaper for the girls and boys in blue to wait until the ICR data stores get exfiltrated / torrented, and fish through it then, surely?

Austerity, we're all in this together, etc, etc...

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Kids' TV show Rainbow in homosexual agenda shocker

Tim Jenkins

For even younger viewers, MDMA was a drug once favoured by "mum and dad" but has now been supplanted in popularity by 'orrible pills and powders spewing out of Chinese fertiliser factories, which is why we can still use the 'Just Say No' approach with you, even though we clearly didn't say No when we were your age...

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Steve Jobs mural highlights plight of Syrian refugees

Tim Jenkins

Re: "keenly observed"

As clearly shown when SJ lifted the first one from its bag back in 1984:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2B-XwPjn9YY (about 50 seconds in)

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Enraged Brits demand Donald Trump UK ban

Tim Jenkins

...a potato would do a better job than Trump...

or, as some Republicans would have it, a potatoe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wdqbi66oNuI

(Whatever happened to him, apart from being forever known as George W's Number Two?)

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Outsourcer didn't press ON switch, so Reg reader flew 15 hours to do the job

Tim Jenkins

"...designers know better..."

"I say, chaps, on our next case thingy, why don't we put the power button just to the right of that bit, you know, the slidy-draw where the shiny spinny things go in and out?"

"Golly, good thinking, Tarqin; now, who's up for a refreshing 'diet' Coke break?"

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Cyber-terror: How real is the threat? Squirrels are more of a danger

Tim Jenkins

Re: 1 in 5 Squirrels

is gay?

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BT could lawyer up after Sky’s sport channels obligation removed

Tim Jenkins

Not entirely tosh; my reading of it is that if you opt for the new multi-room model, each additional 'Sky Q mini' box acts as a wifi repeater, via either 802.11 or powerline, presumably in order to get ensure bandwidth to stream HD content to other TVs or wireless devices from the 'master' box that holds the hard drive and connects to the satellite feeds. I'm actually quite looking forward to it, as it bugs me that I have recorded programmes in the living room which I can't access in the bedroom, even though the Sky HD+ box itself is on the house LAN and WLAN...

http://www.techradar.com/news/television/first-impression-sky-q-1309224

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'Shut down the parts of internet used by Islamic State masterminds'

Tim Jenkins

Re: Well that's a good solution

I think the clue was in the (R-TX) bit.

http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/simpsons/images/4/45/The_Rich_texan_tapped_out.png

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Linus Torvalds targeted by honeytraps, claims Eric S. Raymond

Tim Jenkins

...he was taken down due to perjury...

Not even that; Slick Willie was acquitted by the Senate (failure to reach the 2/3 vote necessary to remove an incumbent President), and served out his full two terms in office.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impeachment_and_acquittal_of_Bill_Clinton

(he was, however, responsible for the introduction to mainstream America of the often repeated phrase 'semen-stained dress', so kudos for that...)

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Stick a pin in a sales droid to avoid cable voodoo

Tim Jenkins

Macintosh HDI-30

That square, friction-fit SCSI port on the back of mid-90's Apple PowerBooks. Guaranteed not to be inserted correctly by the user (preventing a successful boot), or to be plugged/unplugged while in action, or to get twisted slightly by the cable to the daisychained device and causing the laptop to lose connection with its own HDD rather violently....

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UK's internet spy law: £250m in costs could balloon to £2 BILLION

Tim Jenkins
Coat

"Lots of usual talk about the 4 horsemen"

Don't think I've seen that one. Is it available on rotten dot com?

( data fetishists play time sounds good too)

/eyebleach

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Feds spank naughty Hilton, M.C. Dean in Wi-Fi jamming crackdown

Tim Jenkins

Re: ** Free ** ubiquitous wi-fi

Ummmm; I think you might have misunderstood the story. The Hilton guests were using their own mobiles and associated data plans (for which they were presumably paying their cell company), and then connecting other wifi devices to the personal hotspot broadcast by the phone; a perfectly legitimate use of technology even in a hotel room. The accusation is that the Hilton chose to use its own building WiFi units, presumably in 'rogue-AP' blocking mode, to make this harder to do by swamping or otherwise interfering with the phone hotspot signal, thus forcing guests to use the hotel pay-for WiFi access, which is really rather naughty...

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US govt drafts Google, Walmart, Amazon, BestBuy execs for drone registration system

Tim Jenkins

So...

So, in the Land of the Free*, the drone you shoot down will be registered, but the firearm you shot it with won't be....

*Note: not a dig, just a bemused comment from a country where only criminals can buy guns. I fully support your right to arm bears and all other mammals with suitable upper-limb dexterity.

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Online daters swindled out of £33m last year – police

Tim Jenkins

"3,543 people... with a total financial loss of £33,650,491"

£10K each? Damn...

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Chaos at TalkTalk: Data was 'secure', not all encrypted, we took site down, were DDoSed

Tim Jenkins

Re: Sustained???

"they were distracted by a DDoS, that is the sustained bit. Instead of pulling the servers, they were focused on that and missed the penetration"

Wasn't that exactly what happened in one of the the big Sony breaches, where the perps used a DDOS to hide the exfiltration of TBs of data?

Can't imagine even 4 million sets of customer details would be within a few orders of magnitude of that size, though...

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TalkTalk: Hackers may have nicked personal, banking info on 4 million Brits

Tim Jenkins

Re: What about ex-customers?

" she came across extremely well given the circumstances"

Rather less well just now on 'Today', where her reason for not being able to tell customers if any potentially exfiltrated personal datasets are encrypted was that 'TalkTalk systems have millions of lines of code'...

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Weight, what? The perfect kilogram is nearly in Planck's grasp

Tim Jenkins

Re: Heavy science

Bah; trivia. What we really need to know is, exactly how thick is a Planck?

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Amazon Fire HD 8: Mid-spec Nokia Lumi... er, MediaTek slab

Tim Jenkins

"I wonder if that means Mayday was over- or under-used?"

I'm pretty sure the most common Mayday was "Why won't my f*cking tablet connect to the f*cking wifi?!?!". Which, funnily enough, never got an answer...

(Back nearly 20 years ago, when I was doing phone support for a brand of UK-manufactured modems, we left some essential DLLs off the installation CD for several thousand units shipping in the runup to Christmas. The solution was to add a small slip of paper to each box, advising those affected to go online to download them. That was a fun New Year.)

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How long does it take an NHS doctor to turn on a computer?

Tim Jenkins

Re: I still can't get my head round this one

"Almost everyone I know types... ...into the Google or Bing search box and selects the first search result"

or they click the first paid search result (with the indistinguishable-to-the-average-human-eye-shading), which is how that application for a free EHIC ends up with a £49 'facilitation fee'...

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PHONE me if you feel DIRTY: Yanks and 'Nadians wave bye-bye to magstripe

Tim Jenkins

"...no one knew how easy it was to read and duplicate information..."

Back in the late 80's, a certain technical university about 15 miles to the northwest of Charing Cross used perforated plastic cards for its halls-of-residence door security. One had to pay a silly amount in deposit for them, and they inevitably fractured at least once per term. It was, however, entirely possible to back-up* the the necessary information using a suitably sized drillbit and one of the billion or so phonecards that paved the streets in that Thatcherite wonderland...

(*for personal archive use only, and definitely not for mass duplication to allow assorted non-students to enjoy the facilities. That would have been bad)

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Dot-gay bid fails again: This time because it is too gay

Tim Jenkins

no "nexus between proposed string and community."

The only .gay in the .village?

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FBI boss: No encryption backdoor law (but give us backdoors anyway)

Tim Jenkins

...they will very, very aggressively be hunting for it...

or hunting for someone on the inside to coerse/extort/bribe or otherwise manipulate to just hand them the key. Look how good the West was at keeping all those nuclear secrets back in the last Cold War...

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Five things that doomed the big and brilliant BlackBerry 10

Tim Jenkins

"...Then in October, came the global network outage..."

"...leaving BlackBerry owners capable of doing little more than make and receive calls for three days..."

Or, in the case of a group of Network Rail chaps who I shared a hotel bar in mid-Wales with during that week, running up huge expenses on taster menus and vintage whiskies because their meeting protocols said they couldn't work with anything but the latest documents (fairly sensible on a complex track expansion and resignalling project) , and these were all tied up on unreachable BB servers. To their credit, they did spend a while trying to work round the blockage using Yahoo accounts...

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Brown kid with Arab name arrested for bringing home-made clock to school

Tim Jenkins

Re: Is there any case in the real world

Grand Hotel, Brighton, 1986. 24 day delay based on a VCR timer, according to one source. I probably shouldn't Google these things so often...

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Tim Jenkins

...Cubs dressed as St Trinian's style girls...

Back when such things were innocent fun. Unless they weren't. Obviously. No doubt the Operation Yewtree/Hydrant plods will be in touch sometime soon, once they've got Sir Cliff finished off...

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BAN the ROBOT WHORES, says robot whore expert: 'These AREN'T BARBIES'

Tim Jenkins

Re: Where does she draw the line?

If your sex robot has achieved actual self awareness, then you're into a whole different ball *ahem* game . Presumably it consents, or not, with the added option of applying a few thousand volts through its universal sex bus in the event of unwanted docking...

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Sign of the telly times: HDR shines, UHD Blu-ray slides at IFA

Tim Jenkins

Re: UHD Blu-ray is already sunk

"...circular scratches (the worst kind for DVD and other optical disks), probably due to fault or perhaps just dirt in some patron's player..."

Nope; I can assure you that these are always caused by a small person* rotating the disk around the spindle in the DVD case, sometimes for hours, with a small piece of grit trapped beneath it. They are also to be found on EVERY compact disk in a car that has ever had a micro-humanoid transported in it, usually five minutes into a very long journey.

*the single indelible chocolate-button/marmite/jam fingerprint on the label side is the clue

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No, Siri – I said PAWN stars! New Apple TV gets voice, touch control

Tim Jenkins

Why not inductive charging?

Surely one of the few places where this might actually be useful; put the remote on the box and it tops up...

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Broadband powered by home gateways? Whose bright idea was THIS?

Tim Jenkins

I caught two BT-sub-sub-sub-contractors pulling Superfast Cymru-funded multicore fibre up our road one evening in August, and followed them to a new in-pavement hole that recently appeared (complete with BT-branded concrete slab on top). As there are only 20 houses here, I'm assuming we're supposed to be getting FTTRN rather that FTTC, which does leave the question of where they are going to pull power from; it's certainly possible that they'd look at the adjacent streetlight, where there's 'a near 100% chance of finding power' right up until the moment when Powys forgets the node is there and decides to cut off streetlighting to save budget (again)

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Rock reboot and the Welsh windy wonder: Centre for Alternative Technology

Tim Jenkins

...despite its fluffy image, the centre eschews cloud computing....

It's true, we don't like the use of coal to power data centres, but we're also on the ragged end of 5km of copper from the Machynlleth exchange, so our ADSLs run a wee bit slow for anything cloudy (about 1.5Mbs split between 40 users today). Hopefully the loops of 96-core fibre currently dangling from phone poles up the A487 courtesy of the Broadband Cymru project will speed things up a bit, if they ever get connected....

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EE Harrier Mini grounded by errant Wi-Fi calling upgrade

Tim Jenkins

Re: Oldies

Rather less criminal since 1967 (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_Offences_Act_1967), as I think we can assume both Julian and Sandy were a bit past 21 by then, even if they wouldn't care to admit it to any omi who happened to be trolling by...

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Moronic Time cover sets back virtual reality another 12 months

Tim Jenkins

Re: No matter who you pick...

they should probably have avoided picking Martin Prince, though...

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l7kujj0RuA1qdoghio1_500.png

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Windows 10 wipes your child safety settings if you upgrade from 7 or 8

Tim Jenkins

...the covers were ripped off and mailed back to the printers...

By Jove; I suspect you're right, and it's been bugging me for years. Have an upvote on me; )

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Tim Jenkins

...We all know that porn is found in bushes...

'We' oldies knew that, but (sadly perhaps), not any more; one rarely finds a slightly wrinkled Galaxy Tab with its cover missing (why was that, anyway?) under a bush. Hedgeporn, like public phone boxes and state pensions, will be an unknown pleasure to current and future yoof....

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And so it begins... Cleaning up HMRC's £10.7bn Aspire mess

Tim Jenkins

...cost taxpayers £10.7bn... ...was anticipated to cost £4.1bn....

Only 2-and-a-bit-times over budget? Actually not bad by Government IT project standards; I do hope somebody got a knighthood at least...

/sarcsam

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'Cilla Black introduced me to my wife on Blind Date': Channel man's heartwarming story

Tim Jenkins

Re: Diana-steria style grief

If you think this is a bit much, just wait 'til Brucie taps his last step...

(heard him on the radio yesterday doing his mandatory tribute bit for CB, and couldn't help thinking he sounded rather suprised it wasn't himself that had left the building ; )

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Bloke cuffed for blowing low-flying camera drone to bits with shotgun

Tim Jenkins

Re: I sort of agree

"Is it ok to shoot down a hot air balloon flying over his garden?"

and, more importantly in El Reg forums, how would one go about this? Heatseeker? Punt gun? Drone with large pin?

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Minister for Fun opens consultation on future of the BBC

Tim Jenkins

Re: Simple

Good plan; so that's Radio 4 and BBC4. At a pinch, just Radio 4, please (but you can lose Midweek, Loose Ends and that dreadful thing that forces me out of bed on Saturday mornings since John Peel left us). The rest of the BBC? Meh...

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Game of Thrones: Where to now for headless Nintendo?

Tim Jenkins

Re: Wrong horses

I've said it before in these forums, but the great thing about the Wii was (and in our house at least, still is) that each kid could have an identical remote and nunchuk (particularly once 'compatibles' got so cheap). The Wii-U broke that model, and any household where one sibling could seize the GamePad and the other(s) got left with 'stupid sticks' was likely to be an even less harmonious place than before. In this, at least, Mr Iwata was just plain wrong:

"Asymmetric gameplay is really about ‘what if one person gets a special controller and gets a different role than everyone else?’... ...Our development teams have plenty of ideas for asymmetric gameplay and are proposing a lot of ideas and I think that's a good sign."

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/gaming/satoru-iwata-on-wii-u-i-think-it-will-become-increasingly-difficult-from-now-on-to-compete-over-graphics-7936301.html

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Microsoft sprints to finish, emits possible Windows 10 RC build

Tim Jenkins

Re: Ready or not, Here I come

...Do Microsoft have a Plan B if people can't be bothered - decide Windows 7 is good enough?...

Just got around to putting Win7 Pro on a six-year-old Lenovo S10e netbook (1.6Ghz Atom / 1Gb RAM) in place of the XP it shipped with, and it's certainly good enough for the admin and network troubleshooting tasks it typically gets used for (better, in fact; battery life seems longer, and I'm getting usable wifi in previous blackspots). It's not going to become a Windows 10 slablette any time soon.

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Wristjobs, whopping big 4Kers and fondleslabs: Currys' Xmas tech

Tim Jenkins

"...if the £1,000 price tag the Currys chap quoted is to be believed..."

Oh, I believe. Currys call it 'enhancing the customer experience': aged relatives went in at the weekend to replace antique CRT, and came within a whisker of being flogged a 55" curved 3D 4K SMART thing, plus soundbar, extended warranty, installation/recycling and several 'premium' (i.e £49.99 each) HDMIs. About £2.5K for the whole package; probably quite a nice bundle of kit, except all they want to do is watch SD broadcasts over a SCART FreeSat box in a non-internet connected caravan...

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