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* Posts by Andrew Moore

1216 posts • joined 2 Mar 2007

Brits take iTablet moniker for 12in iPad rival

Andrew Moore
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I'm surprised...

...that no one's pointed out that it appears to be running Windows XP.

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Next from Apple: The Pocket iPad

Andrew Moore
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Wrong direction...

Apple are looking to increase the size. The next gen will be called the Max-iPad.

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Scott McNealy signs off in style

Andrew Moore
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Nostalgia...

Sun to me will always be the company that sold me a £5 serial cable for £80.

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Irish board hack prompts password reset

Andrew Moore
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They should change their slogan...

From "now ye're talking" to "now ye're hacked"

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Avatards rush to name sprogs Pandora

Andrew Moore
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Is it me...

or isn't Pandora already a mildly popular name anyway. I do seem to remember one in the Adrian Mole diaries.

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Star Trek to boldly go (again)

Andrew Moore
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Really???

The Borg??? Not in James T's time- His foe du jour was always the Klingons.

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Zuckerberg: 'I am a prophet'

Andrew Moore
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I am also a prophet...

And I predict that in the near future Mr Zuckerberg and Facebook will be as relevant as Geocites, AngelFire, Tripod, Friendster and every other "flavour of the moment".

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China moves closer to a smut-free internet

Andrew Moore
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Hmmm...

Satire is at it's most brilliant when it cannot be distinguished from reality:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/internet_adds_12th_website

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The Avatar storage effect

Andrew Moore
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Yes it's a must see film.

Okay the plot is very Dances with Wolves meets Ferngully. However the plot takes a back seat- It's just a device to hang some of the most immersive, spectacular and realistic visuals ever seen. This is a film that has to be experienced on a massive screen (pref. IMAX) in 3D. I liked one comment I saw online- "This film is for all those people who have ever bought a graphic card to replace the one their computer came with".

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Vodafone to start selling iPhone on 14 January

Andrew Moore
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Apparently...

In Ireland Vodafone are already offering it to entice defectors back from O2- Available now.

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El Reg's PARIS programme attracts high-flying sponsor

Andrew Moore
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Okay...

You've got the sponsor and the logo. Now where's the merchandising???

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Chumby internet-connected alarm clock

Andrew Moore
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FAIL

Already superceded...

...by the cheaper and better looking Chumby One.

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Florida judges banned from 'friending' lawyers on Facebook

Andrew Moore
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BFF???

I'm seeing this everywhere- I presume it does not stand for "Big Fat Fuck" anymore.

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Overstock's Byrne claims $5m scalp over short selling

Andrew Moore
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Well done...

All round. I've been on Patrick Byrne's side since El Reg managed to teach me how naked short selling works. The plus side is that now I know what's happening at the end of Trading Places.

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The return of the Psion-sized PC

Andrew Moore
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FAIL

Fail too

It's a eKing mini tablet:

http://www.pocketables.net/2009/10/eking-s515-mid-priced-and-shipping-from-amazon-china.html

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Parents demand control over text messaging

Andrew Moore
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Here's a more effective method of parental control:

don't give your child a mobile phone in the first place. 2 children in my 8 year old daughters class have already got mobile phones- so the rest of the kids are putting their parents under pressure to get them one too- The way we parents have reacted is to put pressure on the parents of the 2 phone owning children to remove the mobiles from them and to agree a minimal age whereby it should be allowable for a child to have one.

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US data firm blows s**t out of server

Andrew Moore
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Hmmmmmm...

It appears to me that there wasn't any active comms to that server (or electricity for that matter) so I'm wondering how it was being backed up???

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Fujifilm Finepix F200EXR

Andrew Moore
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FD?

Does this model still have Face Dectection/Red Eye removal???

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MS store staff in spontaneous electric boogie

Andrew Moore
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Please

can someone send me Mr Slavins email address??? I have a large amount of money in a Lagos bank that I think he might be able to help me with.

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How the Dunning-Kruger effect will stop techies buying houses

Andrew Moore
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Jobs Horns

Finally...

we have an explanation for Mac users.

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Sputnik, spaghetti and the IBM SPACE machine

Andrew Moore
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WTF?

What?

"With his SPACE machine, Underwood remembers, you could calculate the powers of 2 with a mere nine instructions. "Today, you'd need tens of thousands," he says. "That's terrible.""

What- has someone removed Left Shift instruction from modern processors?

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Edward Woodward dies at 79

Andrew Moore
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and star of my favourite joke:

"Why does Edward Woodward have so many D's in his name?"

"Because otherwise he would be known as E-War Woo-War"

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Legless woman falls onto Boston train tracks

Andrew Moore
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So...

What are the red rectangles tracking in the CCTV footage???

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Police fail to dampen down bonfire night Westminster protest

Andrew Moore
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*SirTainleyBarking

"Must be an election soon"

Bravo sir, bravo.

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Andrew Moore
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The rose...

...so was it a Violet Carson?

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Fifth of iPhone users watching porn

Andrew Moore
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hmmmmm.

Isn't a "intellectual iPhone owner" a oxymoron? Certainly any I've met have failed to impress me with their intellect.

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Female fruitbat fellatio frenzy: 70% give head

Andrew Moore
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Interesting...

An article about fruitbat fellatio and yet nothing about Stephen Fry leaving Twitter (I'm sure there's a connection between the two somehow)

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Windows 7 - the Reg reader verdict

Andrew Moore
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Crashed during install.

And to add insult to injury suggested it was my fault because I had removed a USB device (I hadn't).

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UK fatties demand 'hate crime' status for lardo-baiting

Andrew Moore
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Oh well...

As long as there isn't a law banning us from chucking harpoons at them...

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Sky confirms telly-on-Xbox launch date

Andrew Moore
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Hmmmmmm...

Shouldn't the tag line read "The Simpsons, The Simpsons, The Simpsons, The Simpsons, Futurama, The Simpsons, The Simpsons..."

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iPhone saves woman from bear

Andrew Moore
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Flame

Well...

...at least the bear had the good sense to render the iPhone useless (well more useless than it already was).

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MySpace replaces disks with flash

Andrew Moore
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Why???

It's not like they are relevant anymore- They are soon to go the way of Tripod, Angelfire, Geocites et al (and Facebook & Twitter to follow soon after)

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Welsh yobs clobbered by cross-dressing cage fighters

Andrew Moore
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Methinks...

...Carl4 is just jealous- he thought he was the only transvestite in the village.

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CCTV website recruits video vigilantes

Andrew Moore
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So???

How do they award the £1000 when the max score anyone can have per month is 3???

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Apple chokes on Woolworths logo

Andrew Moore
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There's fun to be had...

...if we can get Sir Paul and Ringo to give Woolworths the thumbs up.

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BOFH: Weapon of choice

Andrew Moore
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A hammer...

...is being too kind.

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Gov demand for Governator to terminate PunterNet

Andrew Moore
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I wonder...

if Harriets just a bit touchy because she received such a low rating on PunterNet?

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Italian Job sat nav driver cops £900 fine

Andrew Moore
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Hmmmmmm...

A prime case of "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."

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Doctor Who fans name best episode ever

Andrew Moore
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Mine...

I would have added Girl in the Fireplace, The Green Death, Terror at Fang Rock, Seeds of Doom and The Sea Devils.

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Muse eye Bond theme

Andrew Moore
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My vote:

Knights of Cydonia for the next Bond theme.

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James Martin apologises for cyclist outrage

Andrew Moore
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Happy

I would like to take this opportunity...

...to talk about the nice "racing stripe" I left on a Renault Migane this morning when the stupid cow driving it decided to pull into the cycle lane without checking to see I was in it. Fortunately I was able to evasive action to save my life but not before my brake lever met her paint work. So what does she do- Drives off as fast as possible- running a nice gouge along the full length of her car.

Made my day that did.

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Brown apologises for 'appalling' treatment of Turing

Andrew Moore
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Let's keep the ball in motion...

First comes the apology; then comes the posthumous knighthood.

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Explorers unearth cat-sized rat

Andrew Moore
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I beleive...

...that Stephen Fry is narrating the series- It's called "First Chance to See"

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PS3 phone out next month

Andrew Moore
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Seriously???

They are going to release a product with a name that sounds like 'anal'???

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Illinois bright spark sparks car inferno

Andrew Moore
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A little late???

First thing I thought when I saw this story last week was "So, who is she going to sue for this?"

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Microsoft says US is top malware target

Andrew Moore
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Gates Horns

Title rewrite:

"Microsoft says US is top malware target thanks to Microsoft"

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Tr.im cuts air supply, says no money in tiny Web 2.0 pot

Andrew Moore
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FAIL

Oh dear...

"How can we monetize something that has already been given away for free for years!!!"

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El Reg space paper plane christened Vulture 1

Andrew Moore
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How about...

"Something else which you lot might want to ponder is just how we can release the Vulture 1 from the helium balloon at a predetermined altitude, without having to put together a mechanism which will add greatly to the payload weight. Any thoughts?"

A simple latex balloon would do the trick- the difference between the air pressure internal/external would make the balloon pop at a particular altitude (some testing needed to determine the amount of air to prefill the balloon with). You could then connect the PARIS directly to the balloon (though this runs the risk of non-separation due to the balloon not disintergrating fully) or have some form of holding mechanism which holds the PARIS as long as the balloon is inflated.

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Half of UK firms have lay-off plans

Andrew Moore
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Hmmmmmm...

But how many of them are just using "The Recession" as an excuse to save money on a few salaries while making the remainder of the workforce pick up the jobs and duties left by those who've been made redundant (with no overtime pay).

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Blade Runner tops sci-fi movie poll

Andrew Moore
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It's good to see...

No remakes make the top 10 list.

Deckard: Do you expect me to talk, Batty?

Batty: No Mr Deckard, I expect you to die.

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