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* Posts by Ian McNee

439 posts • joined 2 Mar 2007

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Japanese nuke meltdown may be underway

Ian McNee
Troll

And next the tsunami of pro-nuclear AGW deniers...

...along the lines of it couldn't happen here because:

(i) we're British

(ii) we don't do proper earthquakes/floods

(iii) I've got a big bucket of sand that I can stick my head in

(iv) <INSERT FAVOURED SPURIOUS BOLLOCKS HERE>

and in any case there's no such thing as anthropogenic global warming so why don't all you limp-wristed lettuce-munching pinko enviro-nazis fuck off back to (what remains of) the Amazonian rain forest seeing as you love plants so much!

Now where was that job offer at the Daily Heil...??

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16

Cobalt-barrel machine guns could fire full auto Hollywood style

Ian McNee
Go

Squad Automatic Toasters

Surely this is a golden opportunity for infantry support and catering functions to be merged saving millions in defence spending.

Simply fit said 1,100 degree barrel with appropriately shaped heatsinks and you could toast waffles, bagels and even do a full-English fry-up whilst suppressing the enemy.

Come on Lewis, it would even be more carbon-neutral!

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Natalie Portman slaps John Galliano

Ian McNee
WTF?

Blimey!

Fashion icon turns out to be vile little wanker, never saw that coming!

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HBGary chief exec resigns over Anon hack

Ian McNee
Thumb Down

You'd trust this guy to deliver your pizza??

You'd open the box only to find that the poor sap had managed to allow someone to eat all the pepperoni off the top and leave a calling-card in the form of a small dog turd.

As for spending more time with his family, has anyone informed Social Services yet??

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Lenovo eyes peeper-pursuing PC controller

Ian McNee
Stop

You need BOTH hands?

Stop boasting :-p~

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Samsung Wave II Bada OS smartphone

Ian McNee
Coat

Crap subtitle opportunity missed?

Bigger & Bada

OK...I apologise...mine's the one with the brick in the pocket and the trolley-mounted battery

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Security shocker: Android apps send private data in clear

Ian McNee
Stop

“People for right or wrong treat Facebook as something that's more personal and private,”

Meh...more fool them then.

Obviously not good and needs to be fixed (especially for more significant apps like Google Calendar) but really, people need to take some responsibility for the how/where/what of their on-line activity.

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Oddjob Trojan keeps banking sessions open after victims log out

Ian McNee
Badgers

And you think...

...that banks get Trusteer Rapport for free? And do you imagine banks don't recover such costs from us in the form of charges and interest rates?

But that's not the main point, which is that any IT security outfit worth its salt offers analysis of mitigation that can be implemented by sys admins and end users. Without that this is hard to distinguish from a corporate form of scareware: buy our software or your customers will be pWn3d!!!

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Ian McNee
Headmaster

Mitigation?

This is very interesting, especially to hear about malware with novel features that appears to be in development.

However, reading the Trusteer blog post, it's disappointing that the only mitigation they suggest is "buy our software". Doesn't inspire confidence in the disclosure.

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Virgin Media to issue firmware update after Superhub slows to crawl

Ian McNee
FAIL

VirginMedia =/= Customer Service

As a longstanding VM (Telewest, Blueyonder) customer none of this is any surprise. The 1st line call centre staff now seem trained to deny any problem their end or with their kit unless something has already been placed on their service staus pages (a rarity in itself). However if you are technically literate *AND* persistent they relent, give you the details of the problem and, if you're grumpy enough, offer a rebate.

It seems to me the only reason for this is to prevent large numbers of lay users from receiving legitimate rebates. This fits in entirely with VM's service model of "spend as little as possible on infrastructure, support and service to enhance marketing and milk existing/new customers as cheaply as possible".

All they have in their favour is that by and large it's a pretty reliable service. When it goes wrong: epic fail.

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Westboro Baptist Church taunts Anonymous over supposed attack plan

Ian McNee
Happy

Kudos!

Almost funny enough to make a barbarian atheist like me wanna go to that church!

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Ian McNee
Go

Nice one...

...as for WBC: tiny & insignificant group of religious nutcases in vile/transparent publicity stunt? Who knew!?

And whatever next? Illiterate hick pastors threatening to burn copies of the Koran? As if!

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Sarkozy: Microsoft represents all that is great about France

Ian McNee
Linux

To be fair...

..."Non, je ne regrette rien" could well be the M$/Ballmer theme tune given their attitude to the multitude of legal assaults on their monopolistic practices.

As for Sarko, to (mis-)paraphrase Dubya: The French have no word for "putain de merde"

p.s. Surely it can be only a matter of time now before Napoleon the Turd honours the gurus of their own home-grown OS, Mandriva! </sarcasm>

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Schmidt promises to get 'permission' before taking over our world

Ian McNee
Troll

Sense of humour transplant please nurse...

Bill was taking the rise (and rather well I thought) - comprende?

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Flying dildo downs Oz stag party bloke

Ian McNee
Terminator

Revenge of Sadville??

Cut your internet pipe (no double-entendre intended...*ahem*) - Sadville is invading Earth, it's just as it was predicted in Doom! Only with more cocks...

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/12/20/sadville_flyers/

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Ambulance dispatch system hit by virus: reports

Ian McNee
FAIL

Ambulances with Windscreens: yes

Ambulances with Windows: NOOOOOO!!!!!!

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English Defence League site pulled offline after defacement

Ian McNee
Stop

Truly impressive how you balance on that fence...

...but that is the privilege of the largely white educated middle-classes. I suppose at least you have the decency to own up to your position. Being white myself it's easier for me to avoid the unpleasant attention of the likes of the EDL, BNP and their fellow travellers but I have Muslim (and others of South Asian origin - the racist knuckle-draggers make little distinction) friends, neighbours and work colleagues who do not have that luxury.

Typical of nice middle-of-the-road liberals your logic is based on several flawed assumptions:

(i) that we can have a reasonable, informed and productive debate with the likes of the EDL and the BNP - they are not interested and away from their "just within the letter of the law" public face their activists and followers frequently resort to violence, intimidation and thuggery;

(ii) that there is somehow an equation between "Muslim" and "extremist" - if you even know any Muslim people personally I challenge you to find one that even approaches extremism - what the EDL mean by "Muslim extremist" is someone who has the temerity to stand up for some the rights and privileges that you and I take for granted as British citizens;

(iii) that it is perfectly OK for the racists and fascists to go about their business with anonymity - NO WAY: if there is one productive thing about this hack (beyond a bit of propaganda and a good chuckle at the expense of the knuckle-draggers) it is that these people are named and shamed - do you never ask yourself why they are so coy about their political affiliations being associated with their real identities?

(iv) that this kind of discussion on comment boards actually matters one jot - much as I love El Reg what you and I are engaging in is just froth - wake up and smell the coffee! :-)

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Ian McNee
Troll

Remember: DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS...

...even if they are ignorant drooling racist knuckle-draggers. Oops...did I just feed the troll? Sorry!

On another note: anyone else notice that OpenDNS are flagging zone-h.net as a phishing site? Conspiracy theories on a postcard please.

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Facebook tagged with $60bn valuation

Ian McNee
WTF?

$60Bn?

Blimey! Just as well these crazy bankers aren't involved in running the world's financial systems, with mad valuations like that we might end up in a situation where huge investments turned out to not worth the paper they were printed on! Oh..wait a minute...

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Subdued RM says government cuts challenge its business

Ian McNee
FAIL

Not just poor quality overpriced hardware...

We ditched RM last year (this in HE rather than schools) after years of woefully unresponsive service:

(i) put MAC address barcodes and chipset info on the PC cases? Nah!

(ii) offer meaningful tech support beyond script-jockey "have you installed the latest drivers?" Nah!

(iii) provide warranty replacement components rather than waste sending out an "engineer" (read: poor sop from a third-party outsource with ECDL and a screwdriver)? Nah!

(iv) simply deliver orders to the right bloody campus? Nah!

When we tendered for new suppliers RM's kit arrived late, was under-spec and still over-priced. Frankly they just did not seem to give a shit that we'd been buying thousands of systems from them for the past few years. Good riddance! No wonder they are struggling.

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ZDI spills beans on 22 zero-day bugs

Ian McNee
Pint

Be fair Robert...

...this is the Vulture Towers International Media Megacorp (missed opportunity for initials to spell VIMTO there I feel...suggestions?) we're talking about: these uber-hacks are probably coked off their tits and on their second bottle of scotch by lunchtime each day.

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Lexmark Genesis multifunction printer

Ian McNee
Stop

For two hundred notes...

...I'd want a lot more than just an iPod dock on an inkjet all-in-one. Or rather I'd want a lot more *instead of* an iPod dock as I don't have a bloody iPod!

Even with the huge cash-back offer this is in the same price bracket as the highly-praised Samsung CLX-3185 *colour laser* all-in-one (that incidentally has Linux support). No thanks!

Clearly an item for the iHavemoremoneythansense fashion victim generation.

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Texting teenager plunges to his death

Ian McNee
Grenade

iEvolve (but not quite fast enough...)

Yep, sad, but legislation is hardly going to stop this. If some people are too stupid to not be distracted by their shiny phone while doing something potentially hazardous the threat of prosecution is hardly going to improve their survival chances.

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'You don't even know what change management is'

Ian McNee
Headmaster

El Reg Standard Unit Required

Really Andrew this will not do! FoTW? FTW! (again) The really does not qualify.

What we really need is a Reg Standard Unit of flamieness and only e-mails that achieve a certain pre-defined quotient (possibly annually adjusted to account for flame inflation) may be considered for the title FoTW. El Reg readers deserve such quality control.

Naturally as I am only a humble reader I am not qualified to determine the precise nature of this measure. However it may include such factors as:

(i) statistical analysis of the deviation of key-presses away from the intended character;

(ii) profanity/capitalisation quotient;

(iii) induced sympathetic reaction index (possibility of apoplexy or derisive laughter affecting the reader);

etc.

Get the big brains on the job!

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Without Meyer, what will AMD do next?

Ian McNee
Stop

In your opinion...

Opinions are great: I have a lot of those too, but when the hard facts blow my opinions out of the water it's time to re-evaluate. Check your favourite hardware tech sites: Sandy Bridge delivers X58 performance at a similar price point to the mid/high-end Phenom II with significantly lower absolute power consumption (never mind power/performance). It's not a breakthrough innovation but to argue that that doesn't represent some kind of technical excellence is pure semantics.

Of course you are right that the vast majority of chip sales are made without reference to the technicalities or the fact that Intel behave in a monopolistic, underhand and possibly illegal manner. But those are hard facts too, that's the world that AMD has to survive in and it will only do so by bringing products to market that are significantly superior to Intel's offerings. Will Fusion be such? Who knows? And therefore, as of now, who cares? You and I may love AMD's product but the faceless market could not care less: they have delivered good (but not Intel-beating) chips late too often recently.

The same goes for Nvidia: it doesn't matter if they unscrupulous back-stabbers (though I'd like to know what your evidence is for that), it can only be a mistake for AMD to upset them to the advantage of Intel. Not nice but true.

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Ian McNee
FAIL

AMD turned negative...

At the point when Intel started coming back at AMD technically with it's Core 2 desktop CPUs and subsequent Xeons based on similar technology AMD made the big mistake of becoming defensive and trying to consolidate the small gains that they had made against Intel.

This mistake, that simply lost time against a newly fast-moving Intel, was compounded by the purchase of ATI. Way to piss-off the company making the best desktop chipsets for your processors and (though it's been quite a while coming) push them into the arms of your deadly rival.

Speaking as a long-time AMD fan Fusion has sounded great...for far too long. Sandy Bridge is here now, technically excellent and aggressively priced. Add to that the Intel-Nvidia kiss-and-make-up and it's hard to see AMD returning to it's position as a small but serious competitor in the chip biz. Shame really.

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Yank fires up iPhone-controlled beer cannon

Ian McNee
Alert

Oh no...

...this is a bleak day: I now have a compelling reason to own an iPhone! Woe is me!

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Apple patent endangers unbiased product reviews

Ian McNee
Troll

Facetious

fa·ce·tious [fuh-see-shuhs] –adjective

1. not meant to be taken seriously or literally: a facetious remark.

2. amusing; humorous.

3. lacking serious intent; concerned with something nonessential, amusing, or frivolous: a facetious person.

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Ian McNee
Stop

But what to do about it??

Oh yeah...I'll just remember to continue not buying anything from Apple! Sorted :-)

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The SMS of DEATH - Can it crash your phone?

Ian McNee
Headmaster

Sent from your Jesus Phone?

Interesting article John..but it looks like your predictive texting is shagged or you have fat fingers (too much beer & xmas pud?) judging by the general unproof-readness.

Read txt b4 send init!

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This year's classy compact cameras

Ian McNee
Troll

Apologies...

<humble-pie>

...am off sick with man-flu trolling the comment columns *ho-hum*

</humble-pie>

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Ian McNee
Badgers

You have a point but...

...who is the classy compact aimed at? I bet the biggest chunk of the market is to people who already have a DSLR system for those times when it's impractical to carry around body, a couple of lenses and a flash.

And for functionality the major DSLR systems kick the butt of µ4:3 every time: more/better/3rd party lenses (without any need for adapters), the option of full-frame sensors four times as big as µ4:3 (higher res., less noise, better low-light performance, etc.) and...ermm...camera bodies that aren't nothing - I wonder if you could persuade a pro to part with their Canon EOS 1D or Nikon D3 (or even the next couple of models down) in exchange for µ4:3?

µ4:3 is a nice alternative to a bugdet DSLR in the consumer - it's a different beast from cameras like the LX5 or G12.

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Ian McNee
Stop

Yeah, all those pro photographers are stupid!

I mean why else would 99% of them be using DSLRs with that pointless bouncy-light-reflex-thingummy?

In case you haven't noticed, no digital display device (let alone the small LCD display/electronic viewfinder found in a camera) is remotely capable of capturing the subtlety of light, colour, contrast, dynamic range, focus and depth of field that the human eye can perceive through that mirror and pentaprism. Yaknow? I hope you do now.

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Ian McNee
Headmaster

Neither compact nor EVIL...

...the Leica & the Canon have (and always will have in these ranges) optical viewfinders, and I would respectfully suggest that attempting to change the lens on the Canon may invalidate one's warranty.

</pedant>

But no mention of the Panasonic Lumix DMC-LX5? Surely a much more significant "classy compact" release for the serious photographer than the pointless Micro Four Thirds DMC-GH2 (http://www.panasonic.co.uk/html/en_GB/Products/LUMIX+Digital+Cameras/Stylish+Compact/DMC-LX5/Overview/5435432/index.html) - it's that or G12 I'd be (vainly) hoping to find in my stocking next Saturday!

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English Defence League membership list stolen

Ian McNee
Coat

As we all know...

...the EDL is not a collection worthless racist thugs and there will be no correlation between their current membership list and that leaked from the BNP in 2008. As if!

Mine's the one with the swastika armband and a copy of the Daily Mail in the pocket.

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Gawker tech boss admits site security was crap

Ian McNee
FAIL

They *weren't* using SSL??

OK...I need help people...my jaw dropped so far that it's locked open and if it weren't the middle of winter with four inches of snow on the ground I'd be in danger of swallowing flies. Someone get round here with a crow-bar or something.

However it is nice to have one's prejudices about the technical illiteracy of these worthless web2.0rhea w@nkers confirmed :-)

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Man caught w*nking over Alan Sugar's autobiography

Ian McNee
Stop

Cautioned?

One would have thought that he could have used the defense that he was simply emulating the author. I don't recall Alan Sugar getting nicked for being a very public w@nker. There is no justice...

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Alan Sugar's 'cockup braindead in call centre clueless' BT row

Ian McNee
Alert

Shock-horror: Lord Sugar found to be pompous ar*ehole...

...and in other news, boffins discover ursine lavatory in arboreal area

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Facebook user locked out of account even with ID

Ian McNee
Troll

Truly shocking...

...probably the kind of company that hosts their critical apps and data on Windows servers!

Will someone please, PLEASE think of the children!

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Boffins devise early-warning bot spotter

Ian McNee
Alert

Statistical methods and pronouncable domain names??

Oh no! xkcd.com will be blacklisted! My life is now meaningless!!

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RIAA and Anonymous sites both downed by DDoS assaults

Ian McNee
Troll

LOIC more interesting...

...being the London Organ Improvisation Course (http://www.loic.org.uk) featuring Otto Kraemer, presumably a top improviser with his...ermmm...organ.

*titter*

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Hackers plant Firefox 0day on Nobel Peace Prize website

Ian McNee

Double smug mode: defence in depth

As the article notes, this is a relatively rare occurrence, a critical 0day for Firefox. But it highlights an important security principle: defence in depth. In this case the vulnerability it either partially or totally mitigated by a number of other factors: (i) a secure OS like Linux; (ii) the ability to browse without your pants down (NoScript, AdBlock, etc.) and (iii) not using administrative logins for day to day usage.

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Wikileaks outs 400,000 classified Iraq War docs

Ian McNee
Stop

Too right...

...but that truth was also a lot more painful for the tens of thousands of Iraqi civilians slaughtered by British and American military forces in these illegal wars. And for the millions still suffering the ongoing consequences.

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Mozilla preempts Google with 'open' web app store prototype

Ian McNee
Go

Actually: how to be genuinely open and make it a success

Try reading the article: this is nothing to do with Firefox. It is all about an excellent Open Source developer producing a genuinely open service to monetize its investment.

At the same time they are exposing the "open" hypocrisy of Google by creating an app store framework that is: (i) usable by everyone; (ii) essentially browser & platform independent and (iii) standards-based. In my book that makes Mozilla very brave and worthy of our support in this endeavour.

Stick it to the man Mozilla!

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Ballerina canned for flashing her assets

Ian McNee
FAIL

Anschluss 2.0??

You've not heard the rumours? I think I read it on Wikipe...oh...

Not a bloody Yank though, so yes <shame> should have engaged brain before typing </shame>

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Ian McNee
Troll

But check out Wiener #350...

...none other than the Web2.0rhea bitch himself: Zuckertwat. Perceptive these German rags, even if <gross-national-stereotype> they have no sense of humour </gross-national-stereotype>

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Tesla Motors: Our cars don't burst into flame, but our emails do

Ian McNee
WTF?

FoTW?? FTW!!!!!

Sorry but that's a bit lame for FoTW. At no stage did our correspondent from Tesla:

(i) call into question your parentage;

(ii) include a sentence that if read aloud on daytime radio would be more *bleep* than wordiness;

(iii) type so furiously as to lose all control of grammar and spelling.

I rest my case.

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Driver follows satnav to his doom

Ian McNee
WTF?

Darwin Award or RoTM?

Such dilemmas... *sigh*

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Google pops warning on Popbitch

Ian McNee
Flame

Ever read my post?

I didn't actually mention Popbitch...bitch :-p

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Ian McNee
Grenade

Oxymoron...

"edgy" + "celebrity gossip"

Now... "utterly pointless crap" + "celebrity gossip" - perfect demonstration of tautology

Burn them, burn them all, NOW!

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