* Posts by Darryl

1327 posts • joined 12 Oct 2007

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Got an Android phone? SMASH IT with a hammer – and do it NOW

Darryl
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Re: Tightwads

Should've given him 31337?

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Hurrah! Windfarms produce whopping ONE PER CENT of EU energy

Darryl
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Re: @Ivan 4

"That's right, I don't need my house heated during the coldest portion of the night...."

So you keep the heating cranked up all night? That's not very green of you.

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Google bows to inevitable, stops forcing Google+ logins on YouTubers

Darryl
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"People have told us that accessing all of their Google stuff with one account makes life a whole lot easier,"

Yes, that's true. One account is great, but why did I need to join a social network to rate a Play Store app?

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Microsoft to Windows 10 consumers: You'll get updates LIKE IT or NOT

Darryl
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Re: Here we go

Or, someone reports them for using the home version in an enterprise and they get sued for breach of contract.

And seriously, no matter what the built-in OS, why would anyone leave control systems for health monitors or CNC systems plugged into the internet? Our CNC controllers get plugged in when the manufacturer needs to connect to troubleshoot and then they're unplugged again.

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The Empire Strikes Back: Disney tractor-beams StarWars.co.uk from Brit biz

Darryl
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Re: Or....

"Frankly, I genuinely find it hard to imagine a more dislikeable legal role than Disney IP lawyer."

Well... Aple IP lawyer ranks right up (down?) there.

OK, how about IP lawyer in general?

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Office 365 prices 'to rise by up to 13 per cent'

Darryl
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And my reseller wanted to know why I wanted 50 ProPlus licenses instead of 50 O365 subscriptions...

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We tried using Windows 10 for real work and ... oh, the horror

Darryl
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To be fair...

Photoshop 7 has always given me grief with installing on Win7 64 bit - Windows redirects it to 'Program Files (x86)', which it's supposed to do, but PS7 doesn't like being anywhere but 'Program Files'. It's been a while - can't remember how to work around it.

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Canuck chump cuffed over helium balloon flying chair stunt

Darryl
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Re: Go Calgary!

Q: What's the best thing to come out of Calgary?

A: Highway 2 north to Edmonton.

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Apple recalls Beats speakers: Rap chap's crap batt rapped in zap mishap flap

Darryl
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Trollface

It IS a division of Apple now, so...

...the obligatory

'You're listening to it wrong.'

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Siri, dim the lights and warm us up: First gizmos for Apple HomeKit love-in emerge

Darryl
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Awesome. Now we can all look forward to hours of mainstream media coverage of how Apple invented smart homes.

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Intel adopts 40Gb per SECOND USB-C plug for Thunderbolt 3.0

Darryl
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Re: Price

Besides, you can already run a nice little port replicator on your laptop using plain old USB3, including running dual monitors and gigabit ethernet.

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It's FREE WINDOWS 10 time: 29 July is D-Day, yells Microsoft

Darryl
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Re: Loving the free upgrade

"At $150/hour get someone else to do it for you."

Or at least give yourself some sort of 'friends and family' discount.

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And then the Google lad says: Of course you can use Android Wear without a smartphone

Darryl
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Re: Alerts. The World Needs More Lerts

's what happens when you try to type a comment on a smartwatch.

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Multiple fondling on the MIGHTY 12-INCH iOS 9 SLAB — so, so close now

Darryl
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Re: @Emmanuel: They are getting bigger......

"most of the walls in our house have rounded edges..."

Expect a visit from Apple's lawyers

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Apple announces 'Home' iOS 9 app to run the Internet of Stuff

Darryl
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Re: oh £100 light bulbs with that special glow

£100 for the 40 watt (equivalent) version

add £100 if you want 60 watts, and another £100 for the 100 watt

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Apple Watch fanbois suffer PAINFUL RASH after sweaty wristjob action

Darryl
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Re: How to wear a watch

Shoulda bought the iBelt

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Apple Watch WRISTJOB SHORTAGE: It's down to BAD VIBES

Darryl
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Re: Obsolete? Upgrade?

"If the watch can still perform the functions that it had when you purchased it, then it is not obsolete."

By this logic, you'd think you'd see a lot more iPhone 1's out there in the wild...

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Apple to devs: Watch out, don't make the Watch into a, well, a watch

Darryl
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Re: Time up

BUYING???!!

Whoa, whoa, whoa there, killer...

Who said you were buying anything? I'm sure buried somewhere in the TOS is a reminder that all you're doing is leasing the ability to be hip and fashionable at the coffee shop.

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Darryl
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There's your difference. Rolex makes nice looking watches. Apple makes chunky square blocks with screens on the front.

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The Apple Watch: THROBBING STRAP-ON with a knurled knob

Darryl
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Re: The box epitomises why I don't Apple

Look at me!! Sitting on the floor beside the electrical outlet at the airport, charging my watch as well as my phone!!

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Stuff your RFID card, just let me through the damn door!

Darryl
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I keep my access card in my wallet - I hate wearing the little yo-yo-on-the-belt holders, and lanyards make me feel like I should be backstage at a rock concert, not entering the office from the west stairwell. Problem is, our RFID readers also seem to read NFC credit cards, so when you wave your wallet at the reader, it's a crapshoot which card the reader is going to pick up first. Didn't take more than a few faceplants into a door that's still locked because my Visa won't open it before I finally learned to slow down and make sure I hear the little click of freedom.

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SUPERVOLCANIC MAGMA reservoir BUBBLING under Yellowstone Park

Darryl
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Re: But how many Titanics would it fill?

Pardon me, Official Reg units only please.

How many Olympic Swimming Pools?

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Japan showcases really, really fast … whoa, WTF was that?!

Darryl
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Re: De-acceleration

...or a large anchor tossed out the back door.

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Apple Watch shipments: Pick a number, double it. Hey, it worked for them

Darryl
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Re: Troll....

Shhh... don't contradict. What you're seeing here is the beginning of the RDF in action. Soon, Apple will have invented the wristwatch and everybody will have copied them.

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BOFH: Never mind that old brick, look at this ink-stained BEAUTY

Darryl
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"stuff you leave outside an Oxfam shop before running like hell"

Sitting in a pizza shop and people are starting at me wondering if I'm insane because of the laughing.

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Solar-powered bra maker suffers 20,000 TITSUPs all at once

Darryl
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Re: Triumph...

Passionate about ladies in their underwear

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Darryl
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Re: Seriously, this story was the best gift ever to the editorial team...

Betcha not so firm after they're taken of...

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US Navy's LASER CANNON WARSHIP: USS Ponce sent to Gulf

Darryl
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Re: ACME MIRRORS INC

Possibly, but unlikely. From the video, it looks like the first indication that you're being 'lasered' at is that things start glowing red and exploding.

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One year on, Windows 8.1 hits milestone, nudges past XP

Darryl
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Re: The answer is still no.

Windows 2000 is just a name, not a version number. It was actually NT 5.0, so you don't have to worry.

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Social media data is RIDDLED with human behaviour errors, boffins warn

Darryl
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Re: For completely accurate social media studies, use 4Chan.

4Chan? Isn't that the guy who hacked into Apple and leaked those nudie pics of that girl from the Hunger Games?

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Dead Steve Jobs to give iPod MP3 evidence from beyond the grave

Darryl
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Gee. $350 million? Apple execs might have to dig through the cushions of more than one couch to come up with that kind of money.

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Go festive this year with Christmas carols, baby Jesus and CLITORAL STIMULATORS

Darryl
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Re: Apart from that, he doesn’t do impressions.

No, just as a proper Englishman, he doesn't pronounce the W in a word that ends in W, replacing it with an R instead.

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Oh BOY! The MICKEY MOUSE Apple Watch is no heart-throb

Darryl
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And seriously? The 'watch edition' watch? What are the other ones? Socks and blenders?

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I need a password to BRAKE? What? No! STOP! Aaaargh!

Darryl
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Re: What is the difference...

Over here that joke is about corvettes and cacti

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Darryl
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Re: Sorry

You're lucky. We have the dreaded 'Redneck in a Pickup Truck' to deal with as well as BMW and Audi drivers.

Known as the 'Rig Rocket' as they can only be afforded by oilfield workers, they're jacked up high, fitted with loud exhausts and 24" wheels, and the drivers are almost 100% dicks.

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iPhone sales set to PLUMMET: Bleak times ahead for Apple

Darryl
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Re: Why Are Apple DOOM Analysts Worth Quoting?

The other prediction that the 6+ will be a 'failure' compared to the 6 isn't news either. Samsung sells more Galaxy S's than they do Notes, but they still sell enough Notes to make them a worthwhile product, which is pretty much what I'll bet Apple is finding with the 6+

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Renewable energy 'simply WON'T WORK': Top Google engineers

Darryl
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Re: three "disasters" so far - Three Mile Island, Chernobyl and Fukushima

"So if - during bad weather - a tree falls on a train and kills 50 people, it's a natural disaster, not a train wreck?"

No, more like if a hurricane blows in and takes a train out, killing 50 people, which, incidentally, is 50 more people than were killed by the Fukushima plant getting hit by a record tsunami.

Better ban trains.

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Fake antivirus scams: It's a $120m business – and alleged ringleaders have just been frozen

Darryl
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Re: So the companies might stop trading

Bastages. Cork soakers. Always bullshteining you.

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Darryl
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Re: Now let's clean up download sites.

Sadly it's not just software sites like CNet... I know a lot of people who've made the mistake of Googling 'Java' or similar and clicking the first item on the list - which just happened to be one of the few advertised at the top of the search results. By the time I got involved in one case, they'd filled out the forms with all of their personal info and were wondering if they should buy the 'full support' package, whatever that was.

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Samsung Galaxy Note 4: Spawn of Galaxy Alpha and a Note 3 unveiled

Darryl
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Re: upcoming Blackberry classic

I have two users here - one with a Q10 and one with a Q5 and both had the same reaction when they got them (both upgraded from Curves). Within a week, though, they were going crazy with swiping and tapping, and both commented that the new interface is much faster to navigate and work with.

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Darryl
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Paris Hilton

You'd prefer only reviews of phones with worse screens and chipsets?

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Bang! You're dead. Who gets your email, iTunes and Facebook?

Darryl
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"Most tech firms running online services have remarkably little time for the dying or deceased."

Of course not. You've ceased to become a revenue stream for them. You're not going to be buying any more songs from iTunes and you're not going to be looking at any more ads on Facebook.

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'Most advanced mobile botnet EVER' is coming for your OFFICE Androids

Darryl
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Gee, I wonder what Lookout is trying to sell

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You know where Apple Pay is getting used a LOT? Yes - McDonalds

Darryl
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Re: So....

Supersize your memory from 16GB to 32GB

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Virgin Media CUTS OFF weekend 'net surfers after embarrassing smut-filtering snafu

Darryl
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Re: "Essential Maintenance"

When something goes titsup, what you're doing to try and get it working again isn't called 'maintenance', it's called 'repairs'.

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Eye laser surgery campaigner burned by Facebook takedown

Darryl
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Unanswered question

Does Optical Express advertise on Facebook? If so, there's no way she's ever going to have her page restored.

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Got a spare $600k? Then an ancient Apple-1 could be yours

Darryl
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Re: What is it with Apple I auctions?

Maybe it's to avoid beheading?

“Don’t pick it up, pick it up, pick it up – quick, pass it on, pass it on…”

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UN: Fossil fuels should be TERMINATED 86 years from now

Darryl
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Re: I hate to sound like a broken record...

I also liked the part about how much concrete is used building a nuke power station. Wonder how it compares to building something like the Hoover Dam....

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Even a broken watch is right twice a day: Not an un-charged Apple Watch

Darryl
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Re: Long-term battery life

Ah, but it's an iProduct. You're expected to buy the Apple Watch 1S next year, so you won't care about the old one's battery life.

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