Feeds

* Posts by MrT

882 posts • joined 9 Oct 2007

Page:

We have FOUND the HOLY GRAIL (of batteries), claim boffins

MrT
Bronze badge

Ouch...

...they don't have to be that cruel, Shirley? :-)

0
0

Need a US visa, passport? Prepare for misery: Database crash strands thousands

MrT
Bronze badge

True enough...

... anyway, I thought the problem was very specific to at least one country...

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

I'll c u a k...

... but my on-screen ceyboard tries to autocorrect it ;-)

Many media types would qualify as the p - Paul Foot they are not...

0
0

THUD! WD plonks down SIX TERABYTE 'consumer NAS' fatboy

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: Reg unit?

So, 1 BD has approx 2GoT storage? Sounds okay to me...

But what about the BD version of GoT? If BD GoT-S1 comes on 3 BDs, then 1 GoT takes 6GoT to store.

Meep. Bzzzt. Maybe that's why we need 6TB drives to store more of the same? ;-)

2
0

HIDDEN packet sniffer spy tech in MILLIONS of iPhones, iPads – expert

MrT
Bronze badge

The reference seems deeper than that...

... the only game that teaches the best lesson is the one that isn't listed ;-)

0
0

Fear a terrifying killer robot revolution? GET A GRIP: Boffins invent cyborg hand for humans

MrT
Bronze badge

B-E-A-utiful...

... "I'm free on the seventh at seven."

Sir, I wish to complain about the Fitzall Universal Gloves you sold me, as they no longer fit like a glove...

1
0

Europe: Apple could NOT care less about kids' in-app cash sprees

MrT
Bronze badge

"A spokesman for Apple told El Reg..."

... it all sounded so credible up to that point ;-)

20
1

Unbridled BONKING and rampant ROGERING at YOUR office!

MrT
Bronze badge

Hell's teeth, Dabbsy!

You linked to a Daily Mail 'article' without posting the usual 300x300pixel warning sign first!

0
0

Want to legally unlock your phone from its network? The US Senate says that's A-OK

MrT
Bronze badge

OOOK!!!

Ooook...

0
0

Canuck reader threatens suicide over exact dimensions of SPAAAACE!

MrT
Bronze badge
Coat

AA, eh?

"So we were trying to work out how many A's should be in space, eh?"

"Spacey?"

"Yeah, Space, so we thought four, eh?"

"Foray?"

"Yeah, four. It seems about right..."

My sister has just visited from Windsor, ON, and it did sound a bit like "Road to the North Pole" at times... :-)

0
0

Read the proposed US ASTEROIDS Act to green-light mining IN SPAAAACE

MrT
Bronze badge

ASTEROIDS...

..."If you're gonna claim a comet, stick a flag on it. If you're after space resources stick a flag on it..." it's Destiny, Spacechild.

And the bacronym writers were having a field day there: ASTEROIDS Act, named by the same department that brought you the study into Ballistic Objects Launched Locally over Conflict Zones (bulk quantities, aged stock preferred)...

4
0

El Reg nips down IKEA's 'I've Got A Screw Loose Street'

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: "Telescope for Christmas"...

... or the next level of dance classes? :-)

0
0

Give an exoplanet a new name: Fill in this form and hope these astro-boffins pick your $input

MrT
Bronze badge

Ooh, can we name ...

...one of that planet's moons "Hillyar"? Hits the military no-no button too - James Hillyar RN ;-)

0
0

Google went behind our backs and really HURT US, squeal upset porn kingpins

MrT
Bronze badge

Some say...

...he has shares in an online dictionary and is even now earning cash every time someone looks up 'turpitude'. The rest of the story is clickbait...

6
0

Wannabe Startup CEOs Hate This Guy: Potato Salad man and the $60k

MrT
Bronze badge

Seen in Private Eye 1369...

... this cartoon. Seems to catch the current mood spot on :-)

10
0

Royal Navy parks 470 double-decker buses on Queen Elizabeth

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: a navalised Typhoon

True re: Flankers, but the test simulations I've read about were for a 'full load' Typhoon on peace-time power (thrust-to-weight would be about 1.16 nominal, max fuel, no weapons, down to 0.76 for max everything). They can push harder if required, at the expense of engine life, on the current state of engine development.

They also calculate the T2W with the dry weight of the plane (not ever going to fly like that though), however, max payload would be less than 7500kg from the RAF aircraft; according to Eurofighter GmbH, the additional weight of a navalized typhoon would be around 500 Kg above the land-based aircraft. In most cases, a naval Typhoon would be on fleet defence unless in a conflict situation, so would fly a lot lighter without the more bulky stores - maybe 1000-1500kg (half-a-dozen air-to-air missiles about 150kg each, not really much need for extra fuel, but there if needed). For conflict, add air-to-surface cruise missile at 1200kg or so, drop tanks, etc. and push through the gate to get off the deck.

It still beats the F35B - maybe a max of 6800kg, with over 4000kg of that hanging unstealthily outside the fuselage bays (why have a stealthy jet that isn't that stealthy until after it's dropped stuff? Not all will be drop-tanks...). Naval Typhoon makes more sense in so many ways.

2
0
MrT
Bronze badge

Re: a navalised Typhoon

From simulator studies, the thrust-to-weight of a Typhoon is enough to get off a ski-jump deck of this size without a cat - just needs an arrestor system adding to the flight deck. The ship wouldn't need as much alteration as for full CATOBAR capabilities. Problem would be getting other aircraft off the deck (AEW&C - E-2C Hawkeye, for example), or sticking to relying on ground-based cover or more limited altitude helo AEW.

Thrust-vectoring variant of the EJ200 engine is possible, to assist in lower-speed approaches, and the airframe is robust enough (especially if there's no need to beef up the front gear to cope with cat launch). A naval version for our carriers wouldn't seem to be very difficult to create - STOBAR and not CATOBAR - already used by the Russian navy. Rafale & Typhoon have required thrust-to-weight (at least through simulation testing); it maybe that F35C can also meet the requirements - which, if confirmed, really will limit the take-up of F35B.

2
0
MrT
Bronze badge

"Look out!! CLIFF!!!"

"Whew! That was close!"

Might also work with a nitroused Jaaaag XJS...

3
0

'CAPTAIN CYBORG': The wild-eyed prof behind 'machines have become human' claims

MrT
Bronze badge
Pirate

It must be Metric...

... if it was Imperial it'd be derived from the accepted "slack handful", as used in any self-respecting ironmongers. Although on that basis, claiming more than two slack handfuls might be considered overly boastful, though not out of step with anyone claiming that this stunt worked 110in%...

2
0

IT'S ALIVE! ISEE-3 responding to commands

MrT
Bronze badge
Pint

Well done!

Have one for now and several for later when they park this thing - don't want any mishaps with a stray shopping trolley out at L1.

Well done!

2
0

Still using e-mail? Marketers say you're part of DARK SOCIAL

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: "Survivalist Scone Baking"

Ah, Bradders - she's almost the spitting image of my sister-in-law... somewhere between Julia and Jennifer Aniston...

Though not if drawn by Axel Scheffler ;-)

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

Re: "Survivalist Scone Baking"

It might have matched my profile better if Ray had teamed up with Lauren Child instead... ;-)

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

Re: Makes Complete Sense. I Think...

Most "targeted" advertising seems very short sighted - on everyone's favourite tax-dodging South American river, it seems they only look at the last thing bought.

For example, I got a nice Fiskars axe from them, suddenly I'm a lumberjack - do I want a wood splitting "grenade", a sharpener, another axe and a book on hanging around in bars? I order some arty toys for my girls - perhaps I want everything in pink and pastel shades. My wife orders a couple of books on my account, and things switch track again. The whole front page flips content. I'd love to see what type of person they think they're dealing with.

Luckily, ordering another Marvel DVD or something about Bletchley Park is usually enough to put things right, but as it's happened more than a few times it does mean that I now have The Green Lantern in my collection...

4
0

What can The Simpsons teach us about stats algorithms? Glad you asked...

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: "prove causation" != "observe a [certain amount of] correlation"

Bang goes the secret behind soooo many tabloid headlines...

Still, while we're having fun with correlations, have a look at this collection... the one I like best is 'German passenger cars sold in the US' correlating with 'Suicides by crashing of motor vehicle' - "It's just not as good as everyone told me - goodbye cruel world!" - although the Divorce rate in Maine having anything to do with Per capita consumption of margarine (US) surely must have some mileage with the dairy industry...

0
0

Four-pronged ARM-based Mac rumor channels Rasputin

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: Doh is a dear

Yes indeed - even avoiding the Simpsons, the comedy potential has a long, long way to run...

2
0

Tech that we want (but they never seem to give us)

MrT
Bronze badge

Machines that "know what I want"...

... resulting in something that tastes almost, but not entirely, unlike tea.

The Sirius Cybernetics Corporation welcomes you to the future. Share and enjoy!

Actually, we had one of those MaxPack dispensers at a former employer whose best effort at "leaf tea" tasted like they just picked random leaves fallen from roadside trees, lightly marinated in oily puddles and mixed by Goodyear, so maybe the future has already happened... sadly.

6
0

NASA spots new Mars meteorite crater

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: mmmh...

It seems that way since the picture shows a fairly even spread of smaller points - there doesn't seem to be a pattern, though possibly more to the lower part of the image, and given the scale it looks like stuff has stayed fairly close. It might be the biggest impact observed, but it's nothing like the Arizona crater.

However, NASA won't have imaged it using HiRISE at the time - two years or so of erosion will have softened things. The report mentions evidence of nearby landslips that they attribute to the shock of the impact.

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

Re: mmmh...

Check the HiRISE picture link - the article says the main impact is about 150ft/48m across, (a couple of brontosauri) - the two big ones would occupy a space about as big as a football pitch... smaller impacts across half a dozen or so. Looks fairly head on since its almost circular.

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

HIRISE image...

...and article on NASA's photojournal site here.

0
0

Launching a hardware startup? The stars are aligned in your favor

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: I'm not sure

But surely the design stage is to prove concept and function? Even in the late 70's and early 80's companies like Ferranti were offering custom ULAs, so just get the design right [ ;-) ] establish market potential and batch order. These days for simpler stuff I'd be using PIC style devices and soft-wire stuff. With SoC the fiddling moves ever more towards code-level.

Soldering stuff is fun, and you feel like you are connected to the build, but for anything commercial-scale the production techniques have to step up - there's still a place for handiwork, it's just not viable for most of what goes into bulk items (mobo-based things, etc.). I visited the Pioneer factory in Wakefield well over a decade ago - might have even been late 90's - and even back then they were positioning the heftier components on cable TV box boards (for Canal in France, IIRC) using cameras and robots, with the boards later being floated across solder baths to do entire boards in one pass per side. People just fed the parts and did a bit of moving and shifting - the bulk happened using conveyors.

0
0

Space hackers prepare to reactivate antiquated spacecraft

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: two decades of data...!

There doesn't seem to be much storage capacity - the probe was designed to be in continuous communication. The uplink speeds are mentioned in this NASA link down at the end...

0
0

Samsung mobes to get an eyeful of your EYE in biometric security bid

MrT
Bronze badge

"Good morning, Mr Yakamoto...

...you have four missed calls, and your store account at GAP is due payment today."

0
0

Boeing shows off 7-4-heaven SPACEPLANE-for-tourists concept

MrT
Bronze badge
Angel

Tight-pants...

For some reason, the second picture in the article reminded me of the Liberator's bridge, just a bit. Then you mentioned nice view, etc. and, well, Jenna and Servalan sprung to mind ;-)

5
0

Archive.org web trove hits FOUR HUNDRED BEEEELLION pages

MrT
Bronze badge
Stop

Under construction...

... don't forget little graphics of envelopes with "No Junk Mail" on them, right under a plaintext email address ... because that stopped spam in its tracks ;-)

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

Brilliant project!

Can't remember visiting El Reg back then, but like most people who had anything online in the early days, it's a blast visiting stuff that no longer exists some of mine from '94 was still around for the earliest snapshot). I like the roll-back feature, showing how things have changed over the years.

2
0

'A proper British BOFFIN': Famous Martian prof Pillinger dies aged 70

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: EJ Thribb....

... (17½ million miles, give or take)...

0
0

SpaceX: We NAILED the Falcon 9 landing! The video, on the other hand...

MrT
Bronze badge

That's it!

The tracking was off... Anyone got a jeweller's screwdriver and some tape-head cleaner?

1
0

Voters pick luminous tech spacesuit as NASA's off-world fashion statement

MrT
Bronze badge
Facepalm

So instead of looking like...

...ASIMO (skip to 1:02) the astronauts will look sort of Sontaran-ish. This is not a good move...

2
0

10 PRINT "Happy 50th Birthday, BASIC" : GOTO 10

MrT
Bronze badge
Mushroom

Ah, the ZX81...

...according to the adverts at the time, powerful enough to run a nuclear power station, until someone knocks the table it's sat on, the RAM pack wobbles and the computer crashes, leading to the inevitable China Syndrome and 100-mile circle of death.

All hail the Big Blob of Blu Tack, saviour of mankind...

2
0
MrT
Bronze badge
Pint

Just reading that...

...set my mind off trying to adapt it to play BEEP the musical accompaniment in full 8-bit ZX BASIC mono glory, whilst still being reasonably synchronised to the text display.

And just typing that made my mind jump to what would be required to emulate a 3-channel sound from the same single-channel audio system...

0
0

DreamWorks CEO: Movie downloaders should pay by screen size

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: Sort of Reasonable

Monitors do that already, at least Plug'n'play tells the graphics card what the monitor can handle. The problem comes when my 17" laptop has a higher res than my 32" Sony, and a 10" Nexus tablet can beat both by some margin...

It's unworkable.

1
0
MrT
Bronze badge

So long as...

...we can countercharge for when the movie turns out to be derivative formulaic bollocks, with an additional penalty for all the drip-feeding to rabid press droolers who fawn over every snippet (especially "character posters" and casting rumours) and who would declare a polished turd to be the best thing ever.

6
0

PARTY TIME! MIT slips $100 to each student ... in Bitcoin

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: In other news...

Nothing against it - although some BTC exchanges have been quoting Bitcoin values using the symbol for Baht, probably without realising that's why the symbol exists in the first place.

My comment was meant as a joke - icons still not available on the mobile website - that MIT might dish out one cryptocurrency but then twist things by only accepting others; generosity knows no limits etc. Still, as others have suggested, it's probably part of a case study to see how students respond to the handout.

0
0
MrT
Bronze badge

In other news...

...MIT announces that, as well as USD, all bars will now be accepting payment for drinks in Ł and Ψ. If students want to save time and spend their Bitcoin directly, they should put pressure on the psuedonimical creator to quickly sort out a funky-looking currency symbol, because 'BTC' or '฿' on the bar tariff boards look silly...

0
2

The quid-a-day nosh challenge: Anyone fancy this fungus I found?

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: other peoples after-pub leftovers

I'm sure that there is a way to channel company expense account funds into Vodafone (double Dutch with an Irish twist and a side of Bahama bananas) and then to staff handsets to pay for a 20oz steak, rare with trimmings, so they can take one bite and leave the rest ;-)

0
0

NASA's Curiosity rover set to give Mars its THIRD HARD DRILLING

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: Suspicious

Looks a bit like the Mazda logo to me, with that crack line (?) going across a vaguely oval shape...

0
0

Brain surgery? Would sir care for a CHOC-ICE with that?

MrT
Bronze badge

Re: Perfectly sums it up

>> "TheFlagOfAbandonment"

Thanks - that made me laugh!

I think we've just seen the birth of a new meme... if there's any way to link in cat pictures or Private Eye's Controversial New Columnist, or a Keep Calm t-shirt then I'm sure it will succeed.

0
0

LOHAN and the amazing technicolor spaceplane

MrT
Bronze badge

"Proper job!"...

... and you can't go wrong with one of the team smoking a pipe, brilliant designs and a job done in a serious hobbyists dream workshop like that.

0
0

Opportunity selfie: Martian winds have given the spunky ol' rover a spring cleaning

MrT
Bronze badge

What's really encouraging...

... is they're still confident enough in the rover to be planning another 2-year trip on top of the time already spent out there. Needs "Keep clean and carry on!" on a t-shirt, under a silhouette of Opportunity, all superimposed over Mars.

3
0

BOFH: Oh DO tell us what you think. *CLICK*

MrT
Bronze badge

It's the unwritten part of GTD...

"OK. So: First ALT-A, then drag them all into the Deleted Items folder."

CTRL-A/CMD-A, Delete: any really important stuff will be sent again in a few days... loads of correspondence dealt with and plenty of time left for other stuff - *that's* Getting Things Done ;-)

7
0

Page: