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* Posts by Ian Johnston

574 posts • joined 28 Sep 2007

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'How a censorious and moralistic blogger ruined my evening'

Ian Johnston

Re: What this world needs is more organizations like The Guardian and The Register

The Guardian? You mean that bunch of trust-funded, nepotistic private school alumni who have form for revealing their sources without a qualm if the alternative is any sort of personal inconvenience?

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Ericsson boss sticks a pin in Google’s loony Loon bubble

Ian Johnston

What precisely is the Google plan for dealing with the wind where their balloons are? Blimps are fun, by I doubt many of them can do the 100kt+ which would be required to maintain station in many places.

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REVEALED: Apple fanbois are 'MENTALLY UNSTABLE' - iShop staff

Ian Johnston

Feeling a bit hormonal today, are we?

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Ian Johnston

Re: Be nice to shop workers

Be nice to people, full stop.

It's a long time since I did customer support, but I do remember going out of the way to look after the people who treated me decently.

Did you spot the inconsistency there?

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BYOD: don't let the dream turn into a nightmare

Ian Johnston

Re: BULLSHIT

That is the professional advice and best practices of REAL network admins and directors. Not snake oil salesmen.

Nah, it's appropriate advice for a very small number of companies and paranoid, will-nobody-think-of-the-child job-preserving bullshit for most. The average university has upwards of ten thousand privately owned devices connected daily, and nobody dies as a result.

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Antares apocalypse: Orbital points finger at turbopump FAIL

Ian Johnston

Before getting too sneerily superior about 1960s Russian rocket technology, it might be worth remembering where and when the only spacecraft currently capable of taking people to the ISS was designed.

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Gov.UK doubles IT outsourcing to £20bn

Ian Johnston

As little as that?

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ROGUE SAIL BOAT blocks SPACE STATION PODULE blastoff

Ian Johnston

There is no excuse for not listening on channel 16

Marine VHF is very limited in range, both by power and by curvature of the earth. There is no reason at all to have a VHF set switched on forty miles offshore - it's for inshore and intership use only.

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Trips to Mars may be OFF: The SUN has changed in a way we've NEVER SEEN

Ian Johnston

Re: Nuclear

Not terribly effective for temperatures under several thousands degrees. You need to make the bloody thing glow to radiate heat.

Care to guess why the surface of the moon, and indeed the Sahara, get so cold at night?

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Does this float your boat? Dead Steve Jobs to hijack yachts from BEYOND THE GRAVE

Ian Johnston

Re: Avast, there

http://www.raymarine.co.uk/view/?id=3939

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SHIP OF FAIL: How do we right capsized institutions we thought would NEVER go under?

Ian Johnston

Railway risk

Various inland lines that could have been put into service had been closed and taken up by people who were unable to assess risk

No, they were closed and taken up by people who realised that there was no sense in keeping a railway line open in order to provide a diversionary route which has been closed once, for a few weeks in fifty years.

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Don't bother with Apple's 9 Sept hype-day: Someone's GONE AND BLABBED IT ALL

Ian Johnston

Innovative

According to some of the paper's sources, Apple has tweaked the iOS user interface to include a "one-handed mode" that can be switched on and off, for those with short fingers but who still like the idea of a phone with a larger screen.

Wow. What a stunning, ground breaking idea. Only Apple could ever come up with such a stunning breakthrough. Well, not counting Samsung, who had a one-handed mode on the original Galaxy Note three years ago.

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Ian Johnston

Re: Biting on the Apple

My original Galaxy S does everything I want it to do, as fast as I want it to do it. Much as I would like some new shiny, I haven't been able to find any semi-rational reason for splashing out a few hundred quid on upgrading.

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Firefox 32 moves to kill MITM attacks

Ian Johnston

New features are all very well

But I do wish they'd get round to dealing with that whole "being a bloated cycle-sucking RAM vampire" thing as well.

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Raspberry Pi B+: PHWOAR, get a load of those pins

Ian Johnston

Any sign of the promised education version?

It's only two years late now.

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Giving your old Tesco Hudl to Auntie June? READ THIS FIRST

Ian Johnston

I was beyond fuming

He points out that cheap tablets are often bought for children and by selling on a tablet which has the child’s social network data, the parent might be unwittingly aiding a stalker who could use the identity of the child to stalk other children

He appears to be channelling the collective mind (using the term loosely) of Mumsnet.

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Apple wins patent on charging iThings THROUGH THIN AIR

Ian Johnston

Re: Inefficiency is irrelevant

People aren't prepared to spent money on pointless techno bling? Haven't met many Apple fanboiz, have you?

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British cops cuff 660 suspected paedophiles

Ian Johnston

Re: Good work

At which time the Boots instore advert for photo processing was a life size free standing cardboard cut-out of a child, seen from behind. A naked child.

Somerville was shopped by a presumably hypocritical Boots employee, and her arrest details were flogged to the press by a Metropolitan police officer.

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Anti-snoop Android 'Blackphone' sees the light of day

Ian Johnston

Am I the only person assuming that the NSA is behind this?

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Quick Q: How many FLOPPIES do I need for 16 MILLION image files?

Ian Johnston

Re: 16-page document I was working on last night won’t fit onto a floppy

I have a hard-sectored 8" floppy for a Philips WP system, ca 1984. It has some useful stuff on it, and I dream of one day reading it. I'd be mildly surprised if there is a working system of that sort left, and astonished if it could transfer data to anything else.

Obscure note: the disk was used on Pip, Squeak and Wilfred.

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Tim Cook: Apple's 'closer than it's ever been' to releasing new product range

Ian Johnston

Here we would be going again

If Apple really were about to release something, wouldn't we be getting the usual "Apple engineer accidentally leaves prototype in bar, prototype mysteriously finds its way to Apple-friendly blogger/magazine, Apple claims to sue Apple-friendly blogger/magazine and retrieves prototype after just long enough for plenty of details to be leaked" routine?

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Look out, bankers! It's Lily Cole and her (Brit taxpayer-funded) WISH-PRINTING ATM

Ian Johnston

History of Art at Cambridge, eh? The traditional degree for well-connected but dim girls.

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Batten down the hatches, Ubuntu 14.04 LTS due in TWO DAYS

Ian Johnston

Re: @asdf The desktop deadend.

I've been running Ubuntu since 6.06 and current have it on about ten machines. I have never, ever managed a successful version upgrade.

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Elon Musk's LEAKY THRUSTER gas stalls Space Station supply run

Ian Johnston

Re: Say what?

The usual suspects? Is this Big Oil Shill paranoia? Perhaps Mr Musk should have charged his rocket for longer, instead of relying on what the customer support person (suesequently sacked) told him to do.

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NSA's TURBINE robot can pump 'malware into MILLIONS of PCs'

Ian Johnston

Oh yeah?

"All of GCHQ's work is carried out in accordance with a strict legal and policy framework which ensures that our activities are authorized, necessary and proportionate, and that there is rigorous oversight," the British intelligence agency said in a statement.

A statement which they make so often that I expect it's a keyboard macro in the press office there. Does anyone seriously believe that they would tell the truth about this?

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Anatomy of a 22-year-old X Window bug: Get root with newly uncovered flaw

Ian Johnston

Re: I have looked

Code should not cause compilers to issue dozens of warnings.

Meh. If you're not getting compiler warnings you're not trying hard enough.

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MS Word deserves DEATH says Brit SciFi author Charles Stross

Ian Johnston

Microsoft Word? Oh-so topical

What will Mr Stross think of having a zany, up-to-the-minute pop at next? How about those teenagers and their transistor radios? Or perhaps he could turn his gifted pen to military strategy and explain why so called "tanks" will never replace horse on the battlefield.

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UK plant bakes its millionth Raspberry Pi

Ian Johnston

Re: Maybe they should teach maths

How's progress with the proper education version? You know, the one we were told would be out in September. Last year.

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Ian Johnston

Re: They've done more than you ever will to promote some classroom coding, sunshine

Have you seen many classrooms with enough HDMI-input TVs lying around for every child in a programming class? 'Cos I haven't.

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RIP charging bricks: $279 HP Chromebook 11 charges via USB

Ian Johnston
Thumb Up

Re: Why?

(1) Install Chrome under the OS of your choice

(2) Run Chrome

(3) Login in to your Google account

You now have a PC which is also a chromebook. Congratulations.

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Techies with Asperger's? Yes, we are a little different...

Ian Johnston

"Sorry" is the hardest word.

Is this El Reg trying to make up for the huge number of articles it ran about Gary McKinnon in support of the notion that people with Asperger's are paranoid, unreliable and destructive? Because after that, what sane manager would employ or retain someone with Asperger's?

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500 MEELLION PCs still run Windows XP. How did we get here?

Ian Johnston

Re: But slowly – over time

Vendors? For Firefox and LibreOffice?

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In defence of defenestration: Microsoft MUST hurl Gates from the Windows

Ian Johnston

Re: @Pirate Dave RE: Always a PC

Nervousness about FOSS is entirely justifiable. Where would a company go which had fully committed to Gnome have been when the developers chucked away the Gnome 2 interface because they were bored with it? How would a company feel if it had committed to OpenOffice just before most of the developers threw their toys out of the pram and decided to do LibreOffice instead?

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UK.gov's e-Borders zombie still lurks under the English Channel

Ian Johnston

Re: Let's face it, they're stuffed.

British subjects do not need a passport to enter the UK; we need only prove our identity. A passport is the easiest way of doing that, but not the only one.

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Headmaster calls cops, tries to dash pupil's uni dreams - over a BLOG

Ian Johnston

Respect mah authoritah

According to the Camden New Journal

Mr Szemalikowski ... added that if Mr Zaloom had not used bad language he would still have warranted an expulsion “for his mad ideas and ranting”.

I'd love to know what legal basis he would have for expelling a pupil for mad ideas and ranting. There are very tight controls on exclusions and expulsions; it is not down to the whim of the head teacher.

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Ian Johnston

Re: Oppression

You seem to be a little confused between local councils (who run state schools in Scotland), school councils (which are elected groups of pupils everywhere) and boards of governors (who oversee schools in England).

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Ian Johnston

Re: Knowing your place

Of course in loco parentis stops outside school hours. It means "in the place of the parents", not "as well as the parents".

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Ian Johnston

Re: Truth or consequences

And how often has that actually happened?

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End of an era as Firefox bins 'blink' tag

Ian Johnston

Fonts didn't display at all?

I'm pretty sure they did, because I clearly remember being able to read text on web pages.

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'The Apprentice' is a load of old codswallop, says biz prof

Ian Johnston
Thumb Down

Re: How would the professor know though?

A as opposed top taking business advice from someone who flogged load of cheap hifi in the eighties, a load of cheap computers in the early nineties and has done nothing since but rent out the property he bought with the profits?

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Glasgow subway's new smart tickets aren't, moan passengers

Ian Johnston
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Re: Too cheap

Come to Edinburgh. Local buses (owned by the council) charge a flat rate of £1.50 for journeys of any distance, and £3.50 for unlimited travel for a day. And the system still makes a profit.

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Ian Johnston
Headmaster

Re: No they don't!

Real Glaswegians call it the Subway, which is the name it had from opening until electrification in the 30s. At that point the official name changed to the Underground, but it never really caught on and in changing back to the subway, the cooncil have reflected popular usage.

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Ian Johnston
Thumb Down

Re: No they don't!

I don't believe you. I lived in Glasgow when it was rebuilt, and I never, ever heard it referred to as the Clockwork Orange. That terms seems to be wholly a figment of the imagination of lazy journalists. Give me half a dozen contemporary written citations by non-journalists and I'll maybe change my mind.

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Ian Johnston
Thumb Up

Re: Stereotypes.

Reported in the Herald diary recently: A couple of Glaswegians were walking through the city centre one Sunday and saw it prepared for shooting a disaster movie. Rubble all over the place, burned our cars and buses strewn around. One turned to the other and said, calmly, "I see Celtic lost at home yesterday".

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MPs demand UK rates revamp after Google's 'extraordinary tax mismatch'

Ian Johnston
WTF?

Re: Point 5

Didn't the Milliband boys use a trust to deal with the estate of their late, socialist father?

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Girls, beer and C++: How to choose the right Comp-Sci degree for you

Ian Johnston
Holmes

Re: Does anybody know ...?

He certainly claims to be a very high-flying headhunter, but he also writes for El Reg and shows a strangely detailed knowledge of the recruitment process for entry-level programmers. I think we're talking "bloke in HR" here, with all that implies.

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Ian Johnston
Thumb Up

Re: Agree on pre-degree IT exams

No A-level courses beyond the traditional ones are any use whatsoever as preparation for any HE. English, Maths, Physics, Chemistry, Biology, History, Geography, Modern Languages and that's yer lot, save maybe Music and Art if and only if you want to go on to the same thing at university.

Psychology A-level? Economics? Computer Science? Design technology? All a waste of time as far as HE goes. And anything with the word "studies" in it is fit only for wiping your bum on, at any level.

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Users rage as Fasthosts virtual servers go titsup... again

Ian Johnston
Thumb Down

The people working on this are not engineers.

They are technicians. Thank you.

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Review: Beagleboard Beaglebone Black

Ian Johnston
Thumb Down

Education? Education? Education?

It's a bit odd to say that the Pi's origins lie in education. In fact its origins lie in a bunch of well-meaning techies without a clue about education, which is why it has been a complete flop there, one or two stunts aside. Anyone seen the cased education version we were promised for last autumn, by the way?

All the interesting Pi stuff - and there is a lot - is happening in the maker community, not in schools.

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Who should play the next Doctor? Nominations needed!

Ian Johnston

It's be some anorexic bloke with good cheekbones. Just like every other high profile role on the BBC. Who cares about acting ability?

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