487 posts • joined 20 Sep 2007
Landing Proceedure commences in 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2. . . 1
. . . . . "Please allow maps to update before continuing to your chosen destination" "Maps updating now, please wait" . . . . .
<== But, seriously, if this goes to plan, that cold beer is for the ESA team.
mmmm . . . . so will I be able to hear the pips on my watch? (rather than wait for the wireless to warm up)
Re: An opportunity
"survive space travel and still be drinkable"
In which case IPA might stand for Inter Planetary Alcohol
Are such particles, henceforth, be known as 'Shit Pea Baryons' ? (we need answers)
Re: Dashcam/incar video
But surely incidents such as this highlight the need for mandatory police body-cams as well?
We've found it ! . . .
The weather is very unsettled, undergoing some sort of not-so-well understood change at the moment, it rains a lot, violently at times, and is known to be a bit nippy in just the right places for occupation. This meteorological trend is thought to be gathering pace. There would appear to be significant quantities of a variety of pollutants which may contribute towards proportionate negative outcomes with regard to plant cultivation and animal ingestion thereof. Desertification has been expanding for some time in many areas once considered prime for possible habitation where sustained human existence would very probably come up against major obstruction going-forward. It would seem that over many years some sort of discarded/waste material has built up in the seas and on land, to such an extent that it too threatens the sustainability of both plant and animal existence globally. So, on the whole, it should feel just like home (yeah!).
The bad news is; we haven't got a cat in hells chance of getting there in time before the devastating results of all of the above take hold here on Earth. But hey!, you did ask us to go look and we would like to thank you for the funding whilst it lasted.
So this fella used to work in a wheel barrow factory and would often leave of an evening pushing a brand new wheel barrow with a sack draped over it. The chaps on the gate would lift up the sacking and look underneath, whereupon, seeing there wasn't anything in it, they would wave him through the factory gates with a smile.
So in 50+ years time, maybe . . . .
Thank you for flying with O'Rion Space Travel. Passengers who remembered to book and pay for the 'Landing Supplement' can now make their way to the Landing Podules at the rear of the craft. Anyone wishing to pay the supplement now will have to pay an additional supplemental administration charge of 2m Credits. All other passengers have the option of staying on board or enjoying a short break on a nearby asteroid. Either of these options requires payment in full of an additional supplemental administration charge to cover extra accommodation cost etc. Thank you for flying with ......
(Plus ca change)
Presumably . . .
Should such a projectile miss the intended target it will come to an abrupt halt in mid air, squidge up a bit, turn around, about it's centre axis, and head back towards said target with a 'peww' sound as if being released from some invisible, yet very powerful, spring?
@Dave 126 - Well, if you're sure, but I thought about the crushing and or heat to release the bonding, I guess once crushed, magnets could separate the glass from the metals and sieving / vibration might then release any lighter plastics due to the differing mass. But am not aware of any current process specifically designed for recycling such glass-encapsulated tech devices. There would seem, therefore, to be a lot of work in achieving the materials separation and that's where I see a potential problem, but I guess the costs would come down once this construction mode becomes more widely adopted.
Just wondering how such a construction method fits with recycling/safe disposal regulations currently in force, or waived (apologetically too), around the world today? Oh yes, I forgot, we just send it all to <insert third-world country name> and let the poor sods smash it all up with bare hands and a hammer whilst breathing in the toxic dust, silly me.
So it's like right now we're soo lucky to have like a choice between living in like harmony with the planet or like living in harmony with our shareholders. Short term gain versus like long term aim, sort'va thing. It's, like, kinda wow, I never really realized that was like a thing until now. And, like, because there's soo much less of everything right now we really should, like, go with the shareholder thing because it's all gonna be messed up anyway so let's, like, make the profits whilst we can, sort'va thing. I get it now, I really, really, do, like wow!
Re: Bring me...a shrubbery
Me, I'm investing in garden centres - the fuchsias in garden centres.
A commonly heard complaint throughout the West Indies after the consumption of excessive amounts of very hot, spicy fried chicken, usually blamed on the mysterious black-hole of Babylon.
I guess they just wanted a slice of the action!
<mines the one with the pastebin cook book in it>
Re: The Real Bots
@Primus Secundus Tertius - I'm sure they do indeed have other things to do with their lives, but if you use a device like a mobile/computer for on-line purchases or banking, or just about anything!, you need to be aware that: A) You leave behind a trail of digital information each time, and B) That there are folk out there with the means to access it and who will then wreak havoc with the time you would otherwise be spending doing those other things. The potential risks are too great, we can all fall foul at times, I am just saying we should all treat it all with a lot of caution - 'great servant, terrible master' and all that.
The Real Bots
And who are the real 'bots' in this case, why the human bots of course, the ones who click on each and every link, attachment or pop-up that makes itself present on their screens and in their emails. What more robotic mind-set analogy is there.
This is now must-have 'IT' news because otherwise 'Tech' news is sooo boring, full of server thingies and PCIe storage arrays and all that nonsense. No, we demand 'IT' news that alerts us to the fact that we must be alert to such 'IT' news so that we can carry on regardless, but wow what a story, did you read that, two weeks!
If anything pops-up or arrives in your mail box that is too good to be true, then, well you know what they say. And if you are worried that its an official email and you simply must respond to it, within seconds, or you might look like a dork and miss out on something, then think again. Think again for maybe 20 seconds or more; was I expecting this email?, why is it here if I wasn't expecting it?, if I'm not sure about it then would it matter if I deleted it? - go ahead and delete it!
The interwebs are full to bursting with tricks and traps, both malicious and generally harmless, that rely on good old human psychology to do the work for them. But if you suggest a computer/internet driving license, then it all makes it sound and seem so terrible and difficult a place to be and would scare folk away from all that merchandising and selling potential, and we can't have that can we.
There is a divide, between the human brain (with its complex responses/reactions) and the machine (electronic computer), which so unfalteringly passes current/data across intricate circuits whenever you instruct it to or click/press something. The two are not so very dissimilar, but one of them is utterly dispassionate and rational, the other gets all emotional – can you tell which is which dear reader.
The interweb is not an entirely difficult and terrible place to be, but it is populated and directed by humans (remember that), some of which are difficult and terrible people. In all likeylhood there are humans outside your office or house right now who would consider stealing your car or shoulder-surfing your pin number next time you use a dodgy ATM. Guess what - there are humans just like that behind machines called computers which are connected to the same fluffy-bunny internet as YOU!
I know, I know, I'm preaching to the converted here, but I just don't understand why the media can't just pump out a similar message, are they scared they will scare people.
Cum on . . .
One swallow doesn't make an Ann Summers.
Re: Sexist article
Why is there no complimentary research about young mens abilities, or inabilities, to control their hormonal urges/willies etc. Are less well off men better or worse at understanding the difference between the words 'Yes' and 'No' ?
That's no nipple, it's an innie belly button, or is it just a close-up of a zit?
But, but, officer . . . .
"No, I'm sorry sir, but it's quite clear sir, from the Global Live Record of Everything Everywhere, that you weren't texting / browsing enough sir, whilst the car was driving sir. You can accept an on-the-spot fine of 200 Kredits or attend a Global Consum-a-Tron re-education course, which is it to be sir?"
I don't think humans will have much of a say in where these 'cars' go or what they get up to. One imagines that more often than not ones iGoggle_Fridge-o-matic will instruct the household Drivo-pod thingy (or one of the household fleet of thingies), to nip off down to the Morrisburys Drive-Through-Store and top up with groceries all be-twixt themselves, in a sort of Meals-on-wheels mode. Then, to complete the transaction, one will be pestered by a mobile 'Payment Authorisation Required' alert message, (right in the middle of a thoroughly engrossing planning meeting on migrating umpteen beellion systems to Windows 19), before your tea can begin it's journey home. So long as the fridge-o-matic instructions can be over-ridden by my need to get home from the office, then I suppose it's the way of the future.
But I fancy I might be a bit of a maverick and occasionally take the old motor-car for a spin running on home-brewed ethanol, or sunnink.
Nuisance Spam ...
I for one can never get the bloomin stuff out of the tin in one piece.
just be cos.
* Light Bulb Moment *
<see title - when they get it to work presumably>
The photon generating technology could also be applied to car headlights, because we all know that up-market sport-saloons need really, really, really bright (often misaligned), headlights so they can dazzle every other driver in the on-coming stream for miles.
Air today, gone tomorrow
Dons Car Phoenix
This might not have been the best suite available at the time but I found it affordable and easy to get on with and it did what I wanted it to do. Perhaps he would like copies of the dozen or so 5.25" disk set and manuals? I think I was won over by the colours, all sixteen of them!, having been brought up on either golf-ball printer terminals or those new-fangled monochrome 'green' screens.
So it's true ..... !
This marks the start of the Turd World War.
<hat, coat, toilet paper - see yer>
@Phear46 - The improvisational game 'Mornington Crescent' was an integral part of a brilliant Radio 4 show callled 'I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue', originally hosted, superbly, by Humphrey Lyttelton. London Tube stations and other landmarks are the key features of the game, the goal of which is to 'arrive' at Mornington Crescent tube station via subtle and esoteric means. It was, is, and continues (I think), to be hilarious in every respect.
If they had chosen dead parrots, instead of beer bottles, one could say: Polytechnique Project Ponders Projectile Passed Polly Technique. p....pp.....pp.p...pp.pp (sorry but it's all the feathers in my mouth)
Je raises une beer glasse a les etudiants mais qui!
But everything is star-stuff and cometh from the stuff wot made the stars themselves. We are all in an instant, and for however long the universe is around, cousins in our own universal stuffy way. Rejoice and go forth and multiply (probably by 42), .... stuff is, like, kool!
Pen and Paper
It's good practice, I guess, to have to go back to the old standby routine, sans system support. I certainly wouldn't like to have to cope with that myself in such a pressured scenario as this, but, in many walks of life it's not a bad thing to demonstrate, once in a while, that 'all the balls (airplanes), can be kept in the air' without crashing and without the lovely computer machines buzzing in the background.
Hats off to the folk who did that in this instance. Note to self: - don't forget worry-beads when packing for the hols.
Where will it end?
Got several 'smart' tv sets in our household and when at least two of them are on at the same time all they do is take up all the bandwidth by communicating with each other about what was on last night!
(Me) Erm ... any chance of running the latest update ... or maybe letting me browse the schedules ?
(Tv) Frame hold - and a pause which says 'look buddy you might think that because you paid hard cash for us there's an ownership thing going on here, but we have to put up with the drivel you choose to melt your plasticated mind with, so, no! There are more than 100 channels available here and we're not going to miss any of it, so if you don't mind ...'
[Quote(ish)] from Groucho Marx: "I find the television very intellectually stimulating, whenever it's on in our house, I go and read a book."
Customer Base IT Crowd Source
Customer / IT Skill-Xpert participants must be available on zero-hours contracts and at 24/7 notice to come into their local branch and sort out our IT mess themselves. BUT those 'valued' Barclays customer IT Xperts who would like to sign up to our new scheme will have the chance to win a free set of bath towels every month! Be part of the IT behind our new fabby-tastic banking service today!
Isn't that what human kind has been suffering from for all these years? – been there, done that.
We are, after all, only animals, ones with demonstrably more self-importance than most but, crucially, ones with an intelligence supported upon an inherent animalistic base. We can't change our origins, they are remarkable, as are the origins and development of all organisms on this lonely planet. But surely by now we could have put aside differences like tribe/family, skin tone or sexual orientation for a start.
There a two ways a whole bunch of people can climb the mountain of development; a frenzied free-for-all, wherein the strongest trample over the weak in a mad dash to the summit, come what may, or an approach that recognises that not one of us alone has all the answers and, in order to survive and develop, we need the stronger to reach out and help the weaker amongst us, in such a way that we each assist others along the way and, therefore, humanity as a whole.
It is that inability to recognise the value of the whole human family continuing which is driven by our animal inheritance. Seemingly what we continually develop are ways to distract ourselves from even contemplating that value. Far greater attention is placed upon individual prowess and strength. Let's bury our heads in the sandpit of nu-tech toys and shiny things.
Whilst many scientific discoveries came about because individuals were driven by curiosity to expand our learning as a whole and find solutions to problems of disease etc., many more were driven by financial targets – the industrial revolution might have given many people jobs in factories and sanitation in their homes, but it was underpinned by the pyramid of wealth and prosperity governed by the few at the top. It would of course be wrong not to mention those few brave industrialists who did recognise that by providing good housing, feeding, medicating, educating and generally caring for their work force, they would benefit as well. But, sadly, their forward thinking was overcome by those who saw fit to ramp up output at all costs and seek greater financial gain in the markets instead.
Yes, we need to feed, constantly, but not constantly at the expense of others. If I am shown into a penthouse flat in London with a market value of some £25m, bedecked with all manner of rare metals and fabrics, I find myself not in admiration, nor even envy, but rather sharing a similar level of pure and utter disgust as that which I would feel when being shown around any third world slums, bedecked with open sewers and filthy children.
It comes down to putting aside our 'individual' approach to matters that concern us as a whole. I don't wish for a monotone world were the individual is lost, but rather where individuals who can make a difference, take that action for the benefit of everyone. A world where long term thinking means everyone gains a step up.
We have done clubbing each other over the head and stealing anothers land/property to death, let's see if there is a different way to approach things. Yes, initially, we picked up stones and discovered ways to make useful tools, but then also discovered new ways to make better weapons in the free-for-all dash to the top of Mount 'Wily Waving' – that imaginary summit of all human endeavour.
So I cannot help thinking that our very own intelligence is artificial, and limited, because it has, so far at least, seemingly only led to a few people making it 'to the top' all the time. I therefore dread to think what power hungry, electromagnetic horrors, we might bestow upon generations to come by embarking on the path of developing thinking, 'intelligent' machines, especially starting form where we are now!
Yes, you can still have a pyramid shape to feel smug about, but only one where the 'summit' starts back at the base again, akin to the Klein Bottle, so that feedback and learning goes where it is most needed, to the weaker folk at the bottom.
Just saying, anyway I'm off to hug a tree, cos they are truly humble and magnificent in the main.
The next step . . . .
Being the addition of at least one Robo-Arsewipe® an iTea-Maker® and a Washomatic-Robo-Bather®, perhaps a couple of video camera links, and the care home industry will be washed down the (bed)pan as granny and pops can stay in their own accommodation to enjoy their lingering deaths without the need to endure endless rounds of brain-atrophying sing-a-longs and knees-ups.
"It's hard to imagine a home with kids not having a 3D pen before too long"
But Miss, please Miss, my homework is all melted and dat Miss, honest.
That's what it all needs I feel, a little dash of cracked pepper, pinch of salt, rosemary and perhaps some basil to bring out the best in those tomatoes.
Hats off to the folk embarking on this, they must be a wee bit embarking mad, but tis a splendid example and inspiration to us all. I for one will be foregoing Harrods Food Hall for a while and have already curtailed my orders with Fortnum & Mason.
Whenever I put my jeans on the wash it is her frilly undies that come out a different colour thus proving that my jeans are the dominant ones so there!
Re: That crack pipe sure is hot stuff, mon. We rollin'!!
Pretty much spot on I feel. Tis all yet another bubble bath about to spiral it's way down the plug hole.
Excellent article, as ever, but those 'shops' and 'retail outlets' you speak of are actually 'Fulfillment Centers', don'tcha know.
A Tricky Balancing Act perhaps
Might I suggest that of far more concern are the vast numbers of peeps in other parts of this world who still hold fast to the words of shaman and foretell their futures by reading the entails of freshly sacrificed animals etc. Not forgetting those who still live in the dark ages and cling to the fevered testaments of sooth-sayers who, so conveniently, offered the answers to 'everything' thousands of years ago. What is amazing is that whilst it was really only a natural response for folk to have sought out those 'answers' so long ago, when so very little was understood about the physical world, they continue to insist that all those ancient 'answers' are still valid.
Indeed the 'answer to everything' remains our goal to this day does it not, our inquisitive nature directs such behaviour, but bringing such enlightenment to the masses remains the biggest challenge of all. Could humankind be truly happy and fulfilled once everything is answered, or would we still feel the need to cling to answers that come from deep within our primitive souls?
Long, long, before scientific discovery we learnt how to sing, harmonize and make/play rudimentary musical instruments which gave us a very powerful emotional uplift, and which still resonates strongly with us today - even if endorphine release is, for many at least, enhanced by means of chemical intervention these days.
Perhaps what we are best at is sticking our heads in the sand too readily and ignoring the fact that we have to get along as 'one', together with all the flora and fauna with which we co-exist, in such a remarkable manner.
I am not sure humankind is mature enough to accept that, despite the apparent vastness of the thing we call the universe, we are now, and have been for a very long time, alone, with only imagined super beings for comfort.
Personally I want science to continue supplying answers that continue to improve the practicalities of living here, and maybe venturing a little bit further out into the universe, but I'm not sure I want to ignore the innate and primitive pleasures I take when running soil through my fingers or enjoying music/art/poetry.
So gaining and applying those answers needs to be measured against the still powerful pull of the primitive instincts which have taken far, far, longer to develop within us than this new-fangled science has had time to explain away many of the primitive mysteries themselves.
(Once a hippy always a hippy – I make no apologies)
Just when they said it was safe to go back in the water. Alas I have a sinking feeling about my plans for lead-lined swimwear. Still, the oceans should be even warmer at this rate and folk will be able to surf right through the night, what with all the glow-in-the-dark seaweed etc.
Smoke and mirrors!
Is that how one hacks these new networks?
Soil is truly marvelous stuff, it is beautiful, natures perfect medium for growth. But it is very fragile, just one part of a larger ecosystem and almost impossible to replace once it's gone. Hasn't it been proved many times over the years by Henry Doubleday / Soil Association etc that using organic agriculture (without man-made chemical fertilizers) yields will actually increase against modern agrochemical methods. We dearly need to hang on to soils and the things that keep them in good, productive, shape - hedgerows, bio diversity, natural forms of fertilization. Although arable food production appears more profitable because yields can be higher in concentration and it's easier for machines to harvest in a high density mono-culture, many are of the mind that in the long run (thinking of the children here), we will exhaust the soils performance if we continue with such modern mechanized methods. Soil - once it's gone, it's gone - there ain't no going back. Keeping it alive and well is a current battle for many farmers, together with irrigation and chemical fertilizer costs. We've never had it so good (in the developed world), in terms of the complete and utter luxury of being able to walk into a supermarket, fill a trolly with all manner of produce and then throw it all in the boot of the car - all without a care in the world about how sustainable this habit is. Things do need to change, fast and quite radically!
Nothing to see here, move along.
This is just a recent infrastructure project from Thames Water that has sprung a bit of a leak. They called round and left a note asking if a repair was important and would they like it done within the next 1000 years, but nobody was home.
... when the instrument package is landed there's a sign there saying "Private Land, Trespassers will be prosecuted, Wheel clamping area, No parking". Or maybe they will find one of those plastic-wrapped planning notices, al la Vogon, taped to a metal post of some kind.
Money – almost akin to dark matter – it's everywhere, we are told nothing would function without it and it interacts, with varying degrees, with all of us. Some have the means to attract large amounts of it to themselves, whilst others are less concerned with such attachments, preferring to place more 'value' in people and their environment. Or just plain 'putting up' with the fact that the bloody stuff has to be dealt with at times.
Money as a Sticking Plaster (read Oxfam and International Aid etc.) – doesn't really work because it won't interact properly with 'softer' real-life values, like how to build a shelter for me and my family without it bloody interacting with the individuals who act as a conduit for it and syphon a portion off for their own gains. Human individuals go all bat-shit at the very sight of the stuff and cannot control themselves or think rationally about how to convert it into useful things. Neither does it solve underlying problems in the developing world, it just keeps interacting destructively with dumb people again and again.
Every man on this planet wants; a dwelling, some active employment – rewarded with food or the means to buy food etc. and the chance to improve the lives of their offspring (read educational opportunities). But this bloody stuff (money), distorts and skews the chances wildly. Some people go crazy for Cartier watches and luxury cars – pumping up the particle energy levels of money to unsustainable stupid values. They revel in orgasmic-like trances over everything that glitters, further reducing their ability to rationalise the wider impact of applying too much value to this little understood material.
People themselves are of so much more real value and importance – get over it.
"Your calls may be recorded for training porpoises."
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