LHC back after temporary unexistence

DUMB HOLES AND... PHYSICISTS

According to Einstein’s realistic vision of the Universe, for Holes to exist beyond its mathematical description, they should be made of an ultra-dense substance, able to act as gravitational vortices that absorb one or other type of fundamental energy, depending on the speed at which they turn. This ultra-dense substance, called an ‘Einstein-Bose Condensate’, found after Einstein’s death, happens only with 2 kinds of atomic masses: lighter atoms, which attract each other with the ‘electro-weak’ force; and heavier quarks, which display a force 100 times stronger than the ‘electro-weak’ force, called ‘strong’ force. For that reason, atomic condensates turn much slower, absorbing only sound. While quark condensates turn, thanks to their strong force, 1003 times faster than sound, at light speed, as a black hole will do. Unfortunately, when the quark factory was designed, physicists didn’t know quarks could form Einstein’s condensates, locking their ‘color’ in triads to become stable, before they formed those super fluid, liquid condensates. They thought quarks were unstable, repulsive ‘fermions’ that would become a ‘gas’ - an explosive, hot, quark gluon-plasma. So when we found they form instead, a cold, attractive super fluid, such discovery was labeled as a ‘perfect surprise’ by all the physicists involved2.

Thus Haifa scientists used the laws of 'Bose-Einstein’ to densely pack atoms into an ‘Einstein condensate', creating a supersonic hole that absorbed sound waves. Then they waited to see the Hawking radiation, expecting that the black hole would emit the sound equivalent of photons - phonons - in a burst of noises that a good microphone could easily pick up. In the process the tiny dumb hole would evaporate… Thus CERN would be declared safe and start producing Quark Holes, under the same laws of Einstein condensates this Christmas.

And so a mike was put to the 'dumb' hole to detect, not a glare of light as the Fermi was supposed to observe in the cosmos, but a symphony of sounds.

Unfortunately the worst possible scenario happened. On one hand sound holes were produced with a Bose-Condensate, which means the LHC will produce black holes with quark condensates without the need for ‘extra-dimensions’ postulated by CERN.

On the other, the dumb hole did not produce any sound at all, any Hawking radiation. So CERN’s super fluid quark holes won’t evaporate, either. Instead they should fall to the center of the planet and accrete the Earth.

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