@ Andy Towler (Kiwi vs Aussie)

If you get this - then you'll understand at least part of the difference in the accents!

"A kiwi and an aussie are rounding up sheep for shearing from the back paddocks of a farm, when the Aussie sees a sheep that's tried to jump through the fence and has broken its neck in the process".

The Aussie turns to the kiwi and says: "damn shame to leave that there waste... do you reckon we can shear it?"

To which the Kiwi replies: "Get your own bro', I'm not sharing* with anyone"

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(*pronounced "shearing" in Kiwiland)

Geddit?! no? Sigh. Mine's the one with the wallaby on it.