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UK e-tailers scurry to scrap dodgy Heavy Metal covers

Anonymous Coward

16 point plan

The solution to this problem is easy with my simple 16 point plan

1. Gain access to everyone's web browsing and emailing habits - achieved by creating an environment which encourages ISP's to install up illegal snooping boxes funded through advertising revenue.

2. Ban the 60% of mobile phone subscriptions which are on anonymous prepay and force registration with ID cards (deal with anonymous foreign roamers one day in the distant future)

3. Feed intercepted phone, email, and web browsing records in to mega database

4. Issue ID cards to all citizens and use to join up NHS, Tax, DVLA, insurance and Social Services records. Feed in to the mega d-base and fund from selling this information to 'approved' private companies

5. Publicise the irrefutable link between terrorism and pedophilia to enable wider use of draconian terrorism, pedo and porn legislation

6. Make 'extreme sex' illegal - ensure that definitions are loose enough to catch just about anyone under terrorism, pedo and porn legislation

7. Designate all clubs using exotic dancers as 'sexual encounter clubs' (Roll in to 'extreme sex' legislation later)

8. Connect up all CCTV cameras, use face and number plate recognition and feed in to mega database.

9. Grant access to citizens private records to all police, social services, teachers, council employees, health workers, government employees and their associates / contractors / illegal immigrant cleaners. Just to be sure that everyone is watching everyone else and everyone comes in contact with an 'informant' to ensure a robust internal intelligence gathering infrastructure.

10. Enact legislation to hold 'terror suspects' for 42 days without charge (extend later)

11. Collect the DNA records of all citizens (just to ensure no discrimination) and feed in to mega database while 'considering' the judgement of European Court

12. Make full use of anti terror legislation to allow local councils to undertake surveillance of any citizen on the pretext of school zoning, dog fouling, fly tipping or leaving your rubbish bin lid open / more than 1 meter from the kerb.

13. Appoint secretive judge/jury/executioner panels to be the self appointed moral compass for the nation to determine who is a terrorist/pedo. Ratchet down the threshold until all citizens can be captured.

14. Remove the last remaining powers of the House of Lords to ensure legislation can be enacted unopposed

15. Arrest opposition MPs

16. Depose the Royal Family and Crown Jacqui Smith "Supreme Overlord"

It would actually be funny if it wasn't true.

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