Nurse ... the screens!
Can you imagine taking an 'old-fashioned' Matron around a modern hospital?
"This is the Nurses' Station."
"What's that for?"
It's where the nurses stand around when they're not looking after patients."
"What do you mean 'not looking after patients'? That's their job!"
"Well, it's where they run their sidelines on eBay."
(Sound of Matron using her Uzi on the nurses)