I say we steam on over there in which ever gunboat we have nereby and shell the town for a good few hours, or at least something that looks like the town that happens to be in range. We should then break for tea before getting the ruler, pens and maps out and begin redrawing their borders before settling down for dinner.

Before we leave we should then bill them for the cost of the disruption to the filming, the cost of the gunboat action, that shelling is expensive and not forgetting dinner too.

Black Helicopters - because nothing says imperialism like a black helicopter can.