back to article Lindsay Lohan in 84-minute jail ordeal

Befreckled thespiatrix Lindsay Lohan has failed to break the "shortest celebrity porridge" record after spending a harrowing 84 minutes in jail for drunk driving and possession of Bolivian marching powder - two minutes longer than Nicole Richie served for a similar pissed-behind-the-wheel conviction. Lohan, 21, who was …

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  1. HFoster
    Paris Hilton

    No need to ask...

    ... what the Paris Hilton angle is with this story!

    I wonder what would have happened if Lyndsey Washington from Compton had been found drunk driving and in the company of Charley?

    LAPD, LOL.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    And so goes the celebrity song

    <chorus>

    I never knew what I did wrong

    They said it was money talks

    So I had to sing this song

    To prove celebrity always walks

    <end chorus>

  3. Mark

    The answer, my friend

    is blowing in the wind.

    Well, trousers, anyway.

  4. Alistair
    Thumb Up

    Would you or wouldn't you

    That is the only pertinent question.

    I would.

  5. Michael
    Flame

    And liberty and justice...

    ...for those who can afford it.

    OR...

    ...unless you have enough money to escape aformentioned justice.

    I love the guys comment that they release 30-50 early every day...

    Oh, so the double standard isn't that you go easy on celebrities, it's that you go easy on women. Yeah, that's much better. Wankers.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    Call me ignorant, but..

    ...who the fuck is this Lindsay Lohan woman?

    She's famous for what exactly?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    "Talented redhead"

    Yeah, I've had a few of those in my time, too.

    Most of them were drunk like Lohan too.

    ("Most" came out first time round like "Moist" thanks to a typo, so that sentence could have ended up entirely different...)

  8. Chris
    Flame

    And Barry Bonds will get much longer than that...

    ....for lying.

    WTF!

    Not saying that what either of them did was acceptable, but 4 years max for each of four counts of perjury and obstruction of justice vs. an hour for getting pissed and driving around like enough of a maniac to get stopped?

    So he lied about steroids. She got blitzed and went for a joyride in her car.

    I don't get American sentencing guidelines.

  9. Thomas Vestergaard
    Paris Hilton

    Re: Call me ignorant, but..

    A redheaded Paris Hilton, it would seem.

    Thus, I take she is another american bimbo, who have more breast and money than brains.

    Besides that - I have no idea... And I suppose that is actually a good thing.

  10. Lee
    Coat

    I Wonder

    I wonder what she did for the 84 minutes.

    Surely no cop cares enough about the woman to last that long

    i'll get me coat.

  11. Steven Raith
    Thumb Up

    RE: I wonder

    "I wonder what she did for the 84 minutes."

    Probably the same thing she does for most of her 84 minute celluloid outings.

    Hope that helps,

    Steven R

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