Braaaaaains!
Are they doing college courses in eating brain now?
Welcome matt for zombies, don't eat it
Indicating just how deeply the modern zeitgeist has been corrupted by tidal waves of zombie-themed fictional claptrap, it has now been revealed that students' union leaders have decided that zombies are an ethnic minority in need of protection from racism. The fabulous barrelscraping Daily Mail has the scoop, reporting today …
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I always wondered what the exact mechanism was whereby alien races in things like Star Trek "evolved into beings of pure energy".
It is good to have an explanation after all these years. Presumably the Students' Union at Organian University was once as daft as the one at Sheffield.
As an undead person I was refused entry to a number of Shopping Malls.
However all those people who claim political correctness gone mad, please spare a thought to those people who through no fault of their own have risen "Becuase there's no more room in Hell"
It's a real shame I have risen like I lived as part of the lumbering "George A Romero" type of Zombie, rather the the flight of foot style of the more ala 28 days later zombie, that way they would have gotten through quicker.
Zombism is not a fashion statement it's a way of life "Just walk around any Tesco on a Friday and you will see them!"
And I find it hurtful that people think all we do is eat brains! Haven't any of you seen us eat any other part of the living!!??
I am still waiting for our local council to give me a £100,000 grant to set up a Zombie Minority Drop in centre.
The whole 'zombies don't run' thing is bunk. Even George Romero says it's a matter of choice, he just thinks they'd snap their ankles.
It amuses me that people accept without a blink the idea of dead people walking around and eating other people - but dead people *running*? Whoa, that's just too much of a stretch!
Purists are silly.
Running requires considerably more co-ordination than lurching - ever seen a drunk person running fast in a straight line? I feel that more research is needed into this. We also don't understand about energy spenditure affects zombies. It may be that a zombie only has a limited amount of caloric energy to use and that running after a potential vicitim is less efficient.
So the Mail could be fairly accused of sensationalism, but their reporting is substantially more balanced and in touch with reality than the wacko PC extremists who run this student union. What's more concerning is that anyone takes them or their politics seriously, let alone votes for them. If it's zombie equality today, what twisted unnatural fantasies will they impose next?
If you can be racist towards a Zombie, then "Zombie" is now considered a race of humans?
This is in error, as people are not born Zombies but made into them by an infection of some kind (yes I'm ignoring the Dawn of the Dead remake).
The definition of race is, according to google:
people who are believed to belong to the same genetic stock
And the definition of racism:
the prejudice that members of one race are intrinsically superior to members of other races
Even according to most Zombie films out there, people are not genetically predisposed to becoming Zombies, they are bitten by one and forcibly made into one. So how can one form a prejudice that one's race is superior to another race which is not, in fact, a race?
You can discriminate against any group, or even individuals who are not affiliated in any way but have (atleast in your eyes) a similarity. But you cannot be racist towards a group of people who wear the same coloured tie as they might be made up of different races, so you can only be discriminatory towards them. Consider that all it would take is for you to wear one of the same coloured ties one day to become a member of the race you are prejudiced against. If Zombies existed, all it would take is a bite.
However your race cannot be changed. Someone born Asian cannot become Caucasian. They can take steps to appear so, but their genes remain the same.
A bit serious I know but the misuse and by extension taming of the word "racism" in the media and by normal people in these kinds of situations pisses me off.
Either way if you've ever played L4D you'll know Zombies are superior :D
I searched for it *using* google.
http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&source=hp&biw=&bih=&q=define%3Arace&btnG=Google+Search
The actual definition that I quoted was kindly provided by:
http://wordnet.princeton.edu/
specifically, the third definition under "noun", here: http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=race
if you type "define:word" into google it will look up definitions from dictionary sites for you rather than troll infested comment threads mentioning the word.
If you dispute the definition, feel free to look it up in a book.
"people are not born Zombies but made into them by an infection of some kind"
If that had happened in the U.S., the students might've got better traction if they'd invoked the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) instead of claiming racism.
Zombies could be considered to be "disabled" due to no fault of their own, thus eligible for ADA protection... you know, the shambling and lack of physical coordination and all that.
(Yes, in fact, the writer of this post *is* disabled - although not a zombie - which allows a bit of leeway in making jokes about such things. We should always be able to laugh at ourselves, although it's not quite as much fun when others do it.)
</political uncorrectness>
....and although the company is sympathetic to the needs of Zombies, our EHS policy does not lend itself to direct employment of Zombies in Laboratory and I.T areas. This is especially the case when providing safety cover for out of hours emergency work.
So, apart from Management/Administrative roles, Zombies are confined to Customer service and Sales/Marketing roles.
Badgers, because , due to a typo, HR recruited a Security Badger.