back to article Podgy Googlers get shrunken plates

In a calculated effort to halt the expansion of its staff, Google has shrunk the size of its plates. The data-obsessed search colossus recently ran a study that showed its employees would eat less if it gave them smaller plates. So it gave them smaller plates. Google's on-campus eateries are inordinately famous for serving …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    So you go back twice?

    Sounds like nanny state to me...

    1. Andy Barker
      Pint

      more exercise?

      If you have to go back a second time, then that is more exercise helping burn the calories gained by going for the second serving?

      1. Wize

        Meh

        Just build a wall of potato salad round the edge so you can stack the plate higher.

  2. h 6
    FAIL

    Maybe

    Maybe they should just serve healthy food or healthy versions of recipes.

    When I worked at Blue Cross, the fatties ate pancakes, bacon, eggs, grits and sausage (and a diet coke) whey morning. Good lord!

    And it is a HEALTH insurance company!

    1. Richard 81

      Bleh!

      I just googled grits. Now I feel ill.

      1. h 6
        Go

        Grits

        I'm not a grits fan--as it's all carbs-- but taste-wise, grits actually aren't that bad.

        Soft ground corn with a little butter, or cheese, or the Southern staple: shrimp and grits (usually has sausage in it to boot!)

      2. Munchausen's proxy
        Heart

        But wait, there's more

        I'm told they aren't so bad with enough butter.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        pretty much

        everyone who knows about grits feels that way. they are great, however, under your tyres in the middle of a winter snowstorm.

    2. James 139

      because

      the diet coke makes it all ok.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        FAIL

        there's a good reason

        they don't like the slimey feel on their teeth that the sugary stuff leaves.

    3. disgruntled yank

      Diet Coke

      Umpteen years ago I accompanied a friend to a 100-mile race. I was very interested to see that the runners, most of them with the body fat of a famine victim, were washing down their noodles with diet soft drinks. Then I discovered the my friend favored that as a mid-race tipple.

      So this odd weakness for diet soft drinks crosses the BMI spectrum. Just another thing to frighten the foreigners with, I guess.

      1. peyton?

        re: diet coke

        Possibly because runners typically want complex carbs - not straight sugar.

        But I agree that "diet" soft drinks are anathema. (quotes around diet, since studies indicate they muck with your metabolism in ways that may not promote weight loss).

        1. disgruntled yank

          Worse than that

          Actually, it was worse than that, as I realized after posting: they were drinking lite beer. I guess that my subconscious had suppressed the horror of it. But my friend definitely packed sugarless soft drinks to sip mid-race.

          1. Muscleguy
            Boffin

            Faddism is endemic

            in athletics, just as in the rest of life. Take those silly nose plasters for eg when we know that lung capacity is not limiting for exercise unless you have emphesema (it's cardiac output that is limiting). Until recently mid run rehydration drinks were all sugar, partially inverted dextrose to be precise. I used them dilute since at full strength they were anything but refreshing. Then they got some more science and you got some replacement salts in your sugar solution. Now the thing is all salt drinks (they come in tablets that fizz and dissolve in water), they don't taste of salt (much) because there are no chloride ions (bicarbonate ions instead).

            The problem is we have know for several decades now (it won a Nobel prize) that you need some glucose in oral rehydration solutions for optimum and speedy uptake in the gut. But never mind I just add some sugary salt drink powder to the salt only stuff. Good job I have PhD in Physiology to be able to handle this stuff.

            As for drinking diet drinks mid race, well it's got water in it and will be mildly acidic (aids absorption) but other than that no benefit. Mind you there is a LOT of sugar in full strength soft drinks, one small can of Coke has around 6 teaspoons of sugar in it.

            Back when marathon running got going with the resurrection of the Olympics they swore by alcohol during a long run so I am just waiting for that one. Mind you a while ago I did go for a run a scant couple of hours after having a pint and had a blinder. Excuse me, I have a business proposal to write, in athletics there truly is one born every minute.

        2. Sooty

          re: diet coke

          Everybody I know, lardy or not, drinks "diet" soft drinks because they think they taste a lot better, not for any perceived health benefits.

          This is possibly different in America, compared to the UK, as their soft drinks use different sweeteners, and consequently taste different.

          1. Mike Flugennock
            Pint

            diet soft drinks: UK vs. USA

            I won't speak for the UK, but in the USA diet soft drinks taste godawful -- at least to me. As I understand it, I'm part of that percentage who can detect artificial vs. real sugar, and to whom diet soft drinks taste like aluminum.

            Beer, because it's what I _really_ want right now.

    4. Paul RND*1000
      Joke

      Nothing wrong with grits

      Just throw in some salt, butter and melted cheese and they're completely delicious.

      Oh, wait...bugger.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    um...

    why not just use two plates?

  4. Winkypop Silver badge
    Coat

    Just add more plates

    G OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GLE

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sounds like the Googlers made the rim

    the third half of their plate

  6. Anton Ivanov
    Thumb Down

    You do not need HR algorithm for that

    "[Our human resources algorithm helps Google] get inside people's heads even before they know they might leave," said human resource head Laszlo Bock.

    Any manager worth his/her salary should know this regarding their staff. It is a sad day when algorithms replace basic human social skills.

    1. Steve 13
      WTF?

      before the staff

      any manager knows it before the staff themselves? that's what google are claiming!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      beardys have no social skills

      i'm done.

  7. Code Monkey

    GPlates

    Presumably these are still in Beta?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Fat merkins

    it's the law!

    Let's face it, standard food portions are huge in america. Everytime I'm over there it takes a week to adjust!

    Every meal is like an episode of Man v Food!

    And what's with their inability to hold and use a knife and fork properly!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      FAIL

      knife and fork

      you use a knife and fork? that's your problem. you're supposed to use a shovel. and that's why you have two hands. duh!

    2. Mike Flugennock

      man vs. food

      Yes, the portions are rather large here. Of course, to a guy like me who's been rail-thin all his life and has a metabolism that runs like a Porsche Carrera on the Darmstadt Autobahn at 4am, the portion sizes are just right.

      About the fork and knife thing: I don't know what's the "right way", but the first time our family was stationed in Germany (I'm an old Army brat), I was about six years old, and learned to hold the meat down with the fork in my left hand, cut off a piece with the knife in my right hand (I'm right-handed) and then, with the fork still in my left hand, place the piece of meat in my mouth. No big deal -- quick, efficient, no wasted motion. We ate out in town fairly often on weekends -- we were living in Mannheim at the time -- and that's how I saw everybody else eating, and didn't give it a second thought.

      So, after returning home from our second stint in Germany (1970), I'm about fourteen; our family is out for dinner, and I'm seeing all these people holding the meat with the fork in their left hands, cutting with the right hands, then putting the knife down and switching hands on the fork before the piece finally gets to their mouths, and I'm thinking, "jeez, man, what's up with that? What's the deal with the hand-switching, all that wasted motion?" In fact, I'm even the only one in our family who's not switching hands on the fork, and I'm starting to feel vaguely self-conscious; finally, my Dad leans over, gives me a nudge and wisecracks, "Jeez, Mike, you eat like a German!"

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's supposed to be a psychological effect

    It's not about people wanting to stuff their faces as, obviously, they can just go back for seconds.

    The theory is that a large plate sets an expectation of a certain amount of calories, if you get fewer than expected calories, you still feel hungry. By removing the rim, they haven't shrunk the food plate in any practical sense but have reduced the suggestiveness (Is that a word?) of the plate.

    First person to find the link to the related New Scientist article from earlier this year wins a nouveau cuisine meal...

    1. Kubla Cant
      Headmaster

      Cooking's a girlie

      ... so it's "nouvelle cuisine".

      1. TeeCee Gold badge
        Happy

        Oh no it isn't.

        Nouvelle cuisine is all about tiny portions artistically presented in the middle of the plate, not a mountain of food piled all over it.

        I was once taken to a nouvelle cuisine restaurant stateside. When I was told where we were going to eat I puzzled over how the miniscule portions associated with nouvelle cuisine could be reconciled with my experiences of Yank food servings to date.

        The answer turned out to be 3 foot plates with huge servings of top-notch grub artistically presented in the middle. I suppose I should have guessed.....

        1. Kubla Cant
          Headmaster

          Oh yes it is

          I was trying to indicate in a facetious way that "cuisine" is feminine (girlie - geddit?), so the adjective should be "nouvelle", not "nouveau" as in the post I was commenting on.

          Portions in novelle cuisine tended to be small, but smallness was never its defining characteristic. Its antecedent, cuisine minceur, was the one where eating less was important.

          And, I hate to point this out, but the word is "minuscule".

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Oh I beg to differ...

          The Nouvelle Cuisine that you mentioned is the WRONG and twisted Nouvelle Cuisine that unfortunately appeared in the 90s. The orignal Nouvelle Cuisine from the late 70s, developed by Claude Toigros' family had regular portions on a plate, sometimes even big portions. The difference is that this "new cuisine" was suppose to add fresh, local produced food options to a basic recipe and then transform your regular recipe into something sofisticated. The Nouvelle Cuisine concept was greatly distorted in France and many other places. The little food on your plate has nothing to do with Frech cuisne, Nouvelle Cuisine or any other cuisine per se.

          Have said that, the amount of food on american plates is obscene. All Google is doing is to remove the rim of the plate to make some psychological impact on the people there. But it makes no difference since the restaurants there are open 24/7. Feels a little bit like WALL-E big fat people concept, but they have bean bag chairs instead of floating ones.

  10. SuperTim

    Ahhh Bless.....

    Do the likkle googlywooglies want some more foodywoody?

    How about a large helping of reality to go with your stodge!

  11. petur

    @h6

    Having had the chance to visit Google and eat at their restaurant, I can confirm the food is very tasty, and, unlike what h6 suggests, does not consist of fat stuff you see elsewhere in the US. It was healty food, lots of veggies and fruit for desert (and also froyo ;) )

    So I think also people will go for a second plate. Maybe they should make the food less tasty?

  12. Simple Si
    Thumb Up

    Got your big plate, Alan?

    The chubby googlers may learn something from Mr Partridge:

    Alan "...I’ve got a scam going with a big plate. Do you fancy being my… co-eater… lady?"

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    I didn't think..

    ..that you were allowed to use RIMs in Googleplex!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      that's no rim jobs...

      the plate rims are ok to use.

  14. CD001

    They're just...

    They're just reinventing the Victorian workhouse - expecting the staffers to warily approach the food overlord to beg "Please sir, can I have some more?"

  15. MinionZero
    Coffee/keyboard

    Google is a Corporate Cult...

    All this company behaviour sounds wonderful at first, such as free food whenever you want it. I've worked in this kind of environment and it takes time to see through it, to see you end up giving up too much of your life to be at the company far too much. Its outright exploitation (its like being paid in "free pizzas", which is never a good sign in a job) but the exploitation is hidden. (This form of staff control is highlighting in the book "Corporate Cults: The Insidious Lure of the All-consuming Organization". I've come to realise its far more the Aldous Huxley (Brave New World) form of dystopian control, rather than the Orwellian form of dystopian control.

    Orwell's world controlled by drowning people in overwhelming distracting endless fears. Huxley world controlled by drowning people in endless desires. Sounds wonderful at first, more food, more this, more that, yet its really serving the goal of always distracting you away from seeing the underlying control, where you are basically turned into a battery hen serving the people who are really getting rich and powerful from overworking you to the point you can even loose contact with outside friends and family as you are too often at work.

    Here's a shocking comparison of Huxley's Brave New World with George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four. It really shocking how much it shows the often hidden social control we now live in is really a combination of both Orwell's and Huxley's versions of control. Its basically control via fears and desires. Google are using Huxley's version to exploit people and many of them can't even see they are being exploited. The job takes over, even marriages can break down.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brave_New_World#Comparisons_with_George_Orwell.27s_Nineteen_Eighty-Four

    As for this... i.e. @"[Our human resources algorithm helps Google] get inside people's heads even before they know they might leave," ... What’s even more shocking is the thought that if they can treat their own staff this way, imagine how they really would try to control and manipulate all of us whenever they get the chance.

    Google really is a Corporate Cult and they want all of us to follow that cult.

    1. Velv
      Flame

      And your point is, caller ?

      Or more accurately, what's the answer ?

      Communism ? Everybody receives the same, no matter what they do. All for the good of the commune. Everybody equal, but some more equal than others (Orwell again!, Animal Farm)

      No matter what system, there will always be winners and losers. There is no right or wrong answer. We all have to make our own mind up, and many will be willing to sell their soul for Pizza.

      1. MinionZero
        WTF?

        @Velv: "And your point is"

        Velv, I can answer you with a very old quote: "None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 – 1832)

        If you still can't see then here's a hint. The answer to your question is to seek a course in life which is freer than the corporate rat race. But then some (the young and/or naive) can't see how they are ultimately wasting their time in the corporate rat race, but in time, most are forced by life to learn the hard lessons. Its up to you if you wish to learn from the mistakes of others or you wish to blindly blunder into the same mistakes to repeat the mistakes of others, so you only learn the hard way.

        Whatever you choose, I still see how Google is run (as this news once again helps to show) and I see what a danger their whole attitude is, not just to their staff, but also to the whole world, yet its obvious as Huxley and Orwell showed, some are blind to that danger. Worst still some don't even want to hear any question of it.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          @MinionZero

          So, don't work there then.

          I don't. But I do get free sarnies at lunch time, which keeps you at your desk working - fine -saves me a fortune. I know why my company does it, but I accept that. (they told me at interview!). Free soft drinks too, but the free crisps are ancient history - DAMN that recession.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      dystopian control

      But where does narcisstic personality disorder fit into all this?

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      Yeah, whatever.

      Me, I see the distinction between Personnel (which tended to sound more personal) and Human Resources (which always smacked of Battery Chicken cube-droid) but ultimately any employer is exchanging your time and attention for their money at a mutually-agreed rate. If they can painlessly encourage you to improve the quality of the attention/time you give them, maybe by added benefits, then so much the sweeter.

      Issues arise when the painless becomes painful I guess. Is that what you said? I'm afraid I zoned out somewhere around paragraph 3...

  16. Chris King

    They've missed something obvious...

    If the plates are smaller, you just pile the food higher !

    Cue images of Google staff with foot-high piles of mashed potato on tiny plates...

  17. Subtilior
    FAIL

    Oompa

    The author missed out on a number of obvious chocolate factory jokes. I expect better of the Register.

  18. Tigra 07
    Coat

    They're rehearsing for Oliver!

    Please sir, can i have some more?

    -No, fuck off back to your desk!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      new keyboard please

      and monitor, too. thanks

  19. Sean Kennedy

    Instead of smaller plates...

    ...how about providing employees with paid work out times?

    Hear me out, I know this sounds far more expensive than simply shrinking the plates. So to make up the costs, why not get rid of the food idea entirely? I get that it's a "thing" with google, but were I an employee I'd be much happier being able to squeeze a workout in my day where I otherwise couldn't ( single father ). You could save on the nightmare that is food service ( believe me it is ), even though it'd likely be a wash with a gym's liability.

  20. cphi
    Coat

    looks like some Googlers will now be on the fiddle

    deprived of a square meal

  21. Muscleguy
    Boffin

    Portion Size is All

    You may remember a study from a while ago into why the French are not as lard arsed as the Yanks despite their food dripping with butter, cream and stuff. The answer it turned out is portion sizes. The French simply eat less, the actual difference was only around 10% but for every meal, all through life. That is a big difference over time.

    Mind you it is also possible to cycle and walk in French towns and cities so the French probably get more exercise too.

  22. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    BiGCHEESE Algorithms say ......

    . "All [existing subjective] models are wrong," Google research director Peter Norvig has said, "and increasingly you can succeed without them."

    "Actually, no [existing subjective] models are right, and increasingly you can succeed without them." is much more an accurate up-to-date assessment of Virtual Terrain Team Search, Research and Development.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Yum

    I interviewed with Google and was lucky enough to finish just in time for lunch, so they invited me in to their restaurant. Now I'm a Brit living in the US, so I'm more than used to their massive portions and obsession with adding melted cheese to everything.. but I was delighted to find Google serving healthy and tasty food.

    I wanted to go back for a second round, but I didn't want to look like a fatty....

    Didn't get the job so i wish I had now.

  24. Martin Usher
    Thumb Down

    Its the computers, stupid....

    Food's not the problem. Its parking people in front of computers for 40+ hours a week. Its really bad for your health.

    Q. Why feed people?

    A. If you don't then they go out to lunch and this cuts down on productive time.

    Q. Why not provide workout facilities

    A. Many companies do. However, running them at 6:30am so as to not interfere with work time tends to reduce the takeup a bit. Something to do with lives, families and stuff like that

  25. Petrea Mitchell
    Boffin

    Not exactly news

    "...after the company ran a study proving that employees were less likely to gorge themselves if they couldn't fit as much on their dishes. Not that you would expect anything less from a company that believes it knows when an employee will jump ship before the employee knows."

    Or from a company with a bad case of "not invented here" syndrome... there have been a number of studies on this topic before. (The thing that makes the biggest difference in how much a person eats in an all-you-can-eat cafeteria, if you're curious, is whether or not there are trays.)

  26. Henry Wertz 1 Gold badge

    Healthy choices and diet soda

    @h 6, I had read years ago that Google DOES have plenty of healthy choices that sounded quite tasty to me. Making "healthy versions" of some foods that are inherently unhealthy are simply cruel, people do have the choice though.

    Regarding diet soda: Bleh! Aspartame tastes OK to me, but almost all diet sodas in the US use saccharine. Sorry, but that stuff just tastes bitter and nasty. That said, I don't chug down the Mountain Dews these days like I did when I was high school or college, i drink much more water now (and not bottled watered, nice fresh water from the tap. I can't comprehend how many plastic bottles people must throw out and money people must waste buying little bottles of water when most people in the US have unlimited* safe, fresh and cold drinking water at the tap. )

    *Well, it's metered but it's roughly 1 cent a gallon.

  27. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

    They should learn from the wizards at Unseen University

    You simply build buttresses of celery along the edge of the plate to increase the capacity threefold (Terry Pratchett, "Going Postal").

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