back to article Apple reckons light shines between iPhone customers' ears

Apple has reportedly advised iPhone 4 customers to leave off the q-tips and matches if they want to prevent the device's proximity sensor nixing their phone calls. The shocking auricular hygiene advice was apparently given to the Unofficial Apple Weblog's Aron Trimble. He had gone to his local genius bar, after noting the …

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  1. Annihilator

    TBB Genius

    Penny: What are you doing here?

    Sheldon: A reasonable question. I asked myself, what is the most mind-numbing, pedestrian job conceivable? And 3 answers came to mind: toll booth attendant, an Apple Store “Genius”, and “What Penny does”. Now, since I don’t like touching other people’s coins, and I refuse to contribute to the devaluation of the word “genius”, here I am.

    1. Will Leamon
      Thumb Up

      One of the things I love about BBT

      The nerds don't use macs! I've always laughed at the fact that according to American TV the whole world uses macs. But this is one of the many things that make that show pretty damn credible in my eyes. That and the bit where Wollowitz sells the WoW sword within like seconds of getting it.

  2. petur
    FAIL

    defective by design

    With any other brand, the customer would say: Sorry, that's a load of ****, I want my money back.

    Apple fanbois can take quite a bit it seems. Maybe Apple is testing to see how far it can go with selling crap before their customers actually notice?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      FAIL

      RE: defective by design

      "With any other brand, the customer would say: Sorry, that's a load of ****, I want my money back."

      Who is to say they aren't?

      1. Lance 3

        A lawsuit????

        T Apple offers you 30-days to return it and 4-days after release you had a lawsuit.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          FAIL

          Temporal causality

          Sorry but even fanbois cant reverse cause and effect.

          "T Apple offers you 30-days to return it and 4-days after release you had a lawsuit."

          The lawsuit was filed on the 30th June

          http://www.neowin.net/news/first-class-action-lawsuit-filed-against-apple-amp-atampt-over-iphone-4-issues

          Open letter from Apple 2nd july.

          http://www.tipb.com/2010/07/02/apple-posts-open-letter-iphone-4-antenna-reception-issues/

  3. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    i am a mac user

    and sometimes the so called Genius bar does seem to be staffed by the thickest genius' i have ever met.

    Seems to me, its staffed by spotty yoofs with limited google skillz,,,

  4. John Tserkezis

    The plot thickens..

    Not only were the users holding it wrong, they're also *standing* in the wrong place.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Just a theory..

      But Apple wouldn't happen to hold the rights to Monty Python's flying circus would they?

      I can see it now;

      Job; But it's not really very silly is it? You're going to have to try much harder than that to get your iPhone 4 to work, after all is really only a reverse half loop ever fourth step isn't it? Perhaps you could try and incorporate a liver transplant into it?

  5. Real Name
    WTF?

    Not once have I had this problem

    I don't get it... Ive used it in direct sunlight and everything and not once have I had issues with the sensor. Works fine for me :/

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Boffin

      Re: Not once have I had this problem

      At school your nickname wasn't something like "wing nut", "jug-ears", or "bugger lugs" was it?

      Just a theory...

    2. Shaun 1

      Well

      That just means you must have filthy ears

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Jobs Horns

      3GS

      My wife has the 3GS and has this problem constantly.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        FAIL

        RE: 3GS

        "My wife has the 3GS and has this problem constantly."

        A faulure in the analysis of the problem there methinks.

        How can a feature that's new in the iPhone4 be giving you problems on an iPhone 3GS??

        1. David Barrett

          Its not new

          Its not a new feature - the proximity sensor in my 3g is top left.

          Its just moved and been made more/less sensitive in the 4g.

        2. Pete 48
          Flame

          A what?

          a "faulure" to spell failure, methinks.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Apple

    Bollocks!! Just bollocks!!

    1. Anomalous Cowherd Silver badge

      Er, what?

      Are you suggesting putting the phone to your bollocks to make a call insttead?

      If you do can I suggest you hold off on the video calling.

      1. David Barrett

        I did this too...

        ... but i got a crack on my screen.

  7. Code Monkey

    Now it can't make calls in daylight?

    Or is this because of another software cock-up in the previous iPhone.

    So glad I don't own one of these!

    1. nsld
      Badgers

      Dont worry

      The daywalker upgrade will be released soon.

      Perhaps its more of a reflection the jobsian massive dont see much daylight so the need for outdoor environmental tests wasnt required.

      1. Wrenchy
        Linux

        re: Dont worry

        "Daywalker Upgrade"

        ROFL!

      2. James Butler
        Joke

        Tests

        They tried to do environmental tests, but their drones kept losing the test devices.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    As an audiologist

    I can safely say that explanation is a load of bullshit. Most people's ear canals have a kink in them about halfway along meaning that even when I'm using an otoscope or otolight to view someone's eardrum, I still have to angle it in a very specific way to get a good view. The notion of light being reflected off the skin of the ear canal/pinna/tympanic membrane or anything else is ridiculous, especially since most people position their phone over the concha, which would block any light from reaching the sensor.

    /rant over

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      well said

      nuff said.....

      ive played with the iplank (iphone) and the itampax (ipad) and both left me thinking whats the big deal, closed, expensive, non replacable battery, and most of all itunes (what a piece of shit that bloat ware is)

      personally a mobile phone should first and foremost be a mobile phone, they should be capable of making a call above all else espeically in an emergancy. i will quiet happly stick to using my moto milestone thankyou very much, the prox sensor works 100% on that - ive yet to cut someone of and i can hold the thing how i see fit lol.

      my battery last the whole week nearly unless i want to play that blooming robodefence game then i get a day, but if the worst happens and i run out of juice i open the back and pop in my spare battery - novel idea that.....

      total cost - £320 sim free............

      1. Anonymous Coward
        WTF?

        RE: well said

        "most of all itunes (what a piece of shit that bloat ware is)"

        I've only used it on OSX but it's a dream to use... much better than Windows-Media-thingy anyway!

        "personally a mobile phone should first and foremost be a mobile phone, they should be capable of making a call above all else espeically in an emergancy"

        I can only reply to that with: personally "espeically" a spelling "emergancy" or "espeically" a grammar "emergancy"?

        "i will quiet happly stick to using my moto milestone thankyou very much, the prox sensor works 100% on that - ive yet to cut someone of and i can hold the thing how i see fit lol."

        I'll stick to my iPhone, it doesn't have a proximity sensor and has never cut off yet.

        My old Motorola on the other hand, well, let's just say there's a reason I no longer use it...

      2. Lou 2
        Badgers

        Well said - BOLLOCKS

        What car do you drive - the lowest level and cheapest of what ever is available? Cause you just want a car, right?

        What clothes do you wear? The cheapest you can get at the local yard sale? Cause you just want clothes, right?

        What food do you eat? Cheapest grub you can get? Cause you just want food, right?

        Why is it that people who can't afford something always tries to put it down?

        If you want a phone - then buy a phone. The rest of us doesn't care!

        What a plank!

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Ear?

    I thought the light shone out of Steves backside not the users ears?

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    User Manual

    Wow Apple will be the first company that has to include in it's user manual the way you have to hold its phone along with what environmental factors are required to use it.

    ...not forgetting of course, what size SIM you must use

  11. Piloti
    Jobs Horns

    Genius ?

    If the problem happens again, rather than demand another 'genius' why not demand a refund and buy a device that works ?

    Nokia, HTC, Ericsson, Motorola, even the Koreans have all managed to build devices that stay switched on when in use.......

    P.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    As predicted

    As predicted - Apple are suffering from not doing enough end user testing.

    Registered Apple developers have been asking for years for early access to hardware for development testing reasons. Had apple been more open to such things, then this type of massive FAIL wouldn't have happened.

    It's time Apple re-called the iPhone 4 and resolved the problems. They could easily manufacture a small polythene wrap to go around the antenna, and an attenuator for the ambient light detector. It wouldn't cost much and would demonstrate openness and ownership of the problem.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coffee/keyboard

      Not enough end user testing ...

      They did try it though and some idiot lost it in the local bar!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      Bwahahahaha, Apple and openness in one sentence?

      Surely owning the problem and recalling the 4G to make it work properly will kill the 4GS revenue stream in six months won't it?

      Ahh, my bad, I forgot, it's Apple we're talking about isn't it, the fanbois will squeeee over the 4GS and buy it regardless.

      Paris, she knows how to hold things for maximum performance

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Also explains...

    ... why the fanbois rave so much about Apple's poor quality mp3 playback in more recent models (thanks to inferior chippery than in their early days) - the optimal user is evidently half deaf.

  14. Warren G
    Joke

    For years

    For years Apple have been saying, "Yeah, just get rid of your Windows and everything will be fine".

  15. jake Silver badge

    Cleanliness is next to connectionless?

    ::heh::

  16. tempemeaty
    Joke

    A tiny matter of glowing brain...

    Eh, no worries. I imagine it'll all come out in the wash when those mini microwave transmitters everyone is holding up to their brains finishes the job of making everyone equal. ( -_^)

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Coffee/keyboard

    New keyboard please

    Wots the bets Apples forthcoming jedi-mind-trick-in-software (aka "signal bar fix") steathily manages to detune the sensitivity of the sensor at the same time?

    Seriously though - this whole iphone4 business has more comedy value than standup night at the Palladium.

  18. Anonymous John

    Light bouncing around the ear canal?

    No problem.

    Stick your finger in the other ear.

    Sorted.

  19. DaveB
    Happy

    Look its simple

    I think this problem is confined to Apple users and all they have to do is put their finger in the other ear to stop the light getting through.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      WTF?

      RE: Look its simple

      "I think this problem is confined to Apple users"

      You mean the people who own iPhones are Apple users?

      FFS!

  20. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

    I once used an optomechanical mouse...

    ...that didn't work iunder direct sunlight because the light shone through the shell of the thing and into the optical works.

    Remedy, buy a mouse cover... furry, with eyes and a little tail. That did the job!

    iPhone... sorry, can't help you. Well. You could disguise it as a piece of crap.

    So if someone finds it in a bar they won't take it home and post a video of it on their web site...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Go

      Patented

      Rubber band with a cape!

  21. David Barrett

    Close the windows?

    Close the windows? Its a mobile phone.. I use it when Im outside...

    Perhaps apple will be selling Umbrella attachments for the phone to cast a shaddow over the sensor while in use?

  22. Eponymous Howard
    Paris Hilton

    I don't know which is funnier...

    ...the story itself or that TUAW and El Reg fell for it.

  23. Dave 142

    Good Advice

    Regardless of the iPhone angle it's good advice not to use q-tips on your ears. All ENT doctors tell you not to use them as they can cause damage to the ear and a certain amount of wax is required by the ear anyway.

  24. Richard Scratcher
    WTF?

    Get a grip!

    This is not how the iPhone proximity sensor works (or doesn't work). It has an infrared light and sensor placed next to each other to the left** of the ear piece.

    When the light bounces off something (such as your pinna) and is reflected into the sensor, then the phone assumes it's next to your head. The IR source is coded so that ambient light won't affect it.

    **The iphone 4 has its video camera in the space to the left of the earpiece so perhaps in moving the sensor, they've cocked it up.

  25. JP19
    Joke

    A small suggestion...

    Perhaps iPhone4 users could put a bucket over their heads whilst using the phone.

    I'm sure this would help!

    [Runs away...]

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      Come back...

      Now now.. we all know that would never do, Apple users are meant to be the beautiful people.

      And besides, they'd never wear it unless it was sold by the iTunes store..

      Now there's an idea, the iBucket...

      Paris.. There's a hole in that bucket...

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Or...

      All the iPhone4 users could only use their phones in the dark. Might be a bit rubbish in the Summer months though.

  26. Adam Buckland

    I have to agree....

    The phone does not switch off the screen as well as the 3G does... it has resulted in the mute button being activated on a few occasions...

  27. Electric Panda
    Jobs Horns

    Not a big deal

    Just avoid holding it up to your ear at that angle while using it. Not a big deal.

    -Steve

    Sent from my iPhone 5GS

    No doubt there'll be iEar and iGloves released in September to go with the inevitable new iPod touch.

  28. Il Midga di Macaroni
    Joke

    April the 1st was some time ago

    But better late than never. Good thinking, whoever came up with it.

  29. Gil Grissum
    Grenade

    Where are the fanbois

    First post I've ever seen where there were NO rabid Fanbois defending their leader and his toy company. Nothing to say fanbois? Your genius toy company falling flat on their face again? Now it isn't that you're holding the phone wrong, the light is coming through your ears to cause the sensor to malfunction? Essentially, Apple is saying you don't have much between your ears. LOL!!!

    1. John Bailey
      Happy

      Wait

      Early days yet. They are still shoring up the antenna issue.

      And the outlook issue.

      And the iTunes store hack issue.

      Busy people these fanboys.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    RE: Where are the fanbois

    "First post I've ever seen where there were NO rabid Fanbois defending their leader and his toy company"

    They're all bored by the trolls and other Apple bashers, most of which have never even used an iPhone. Of course, it could be that since the problem seems to currently be limited to one person, they just can't be bothered reading the comments because they're too busy making phone calls with their iPhones...

    1. Wallyb132

      RE:RE: Where are the fanbois

      ""First post I've ever seen where there were NO rabid Fanbois defending their leader and his toy company"

      They're all bored by the trolls and other Apple bashers, most of which have never even used an iPhone. Of course, it could be that since the problem seems to currently be limited to one person, they just can't be bothered reading the comments because they're too busy making phone calls with their iPhones..."

      Its more like ST Steve has waved a shiny object in front of them, dazzled into a trance gazing at the light, they've been spotted wandering slowly towards ATM's and withdrawing large chunks of cash to shower upon their god-all-mighty as they reach the holy temple...

  31. Adam Williamson 1

    Looks like the Geniuses have found...

    ...the BOFH's excuse board. They probably have a game to see who can make a customer believe the most ludicrously unlikely excuse...

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This can be traced back to the iPhone 1

    Had exactly the same problem - will keep on muting the call as your ear touches the screen.

  33. Pecos Bill
    Go

    Solution

    Someone posted elsewhere that they found the solution was to replace the iOS with a fresh copy and reload data from the older phone.

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Never Buy the First Release of Anything

    Honestly, everyone should know by now that final testing of consumer electronics is done by the end-user. Sometimes I think the Bean Counters rely on this as a way to improve the bottom-line of the company.

  35. chris 130
    FAIL

    Looney Alert

    and how exactly did they road test the prototypes....?

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