back to article Apple-obsessed geeks launch fanboi dating site

Here's some bright news for those of you who are so hooked on the divine manifestations of the Church of Jobs that you can't attract a member of the opposite sex: a dating site exclusively for fanbois and gals which reckons that it's "time to share the love". Yes indeedy, welcome to Cupidtino, breathlessly described by its …

COMMENTS

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  1. Graham Bartlett
    Badgers

    Hmm

    I predict very few females on there.

    1. Doug Glass
      Go

      So? What's Your Point?

      All cats are gray in the [basement] dark.

    2. The Fuzzy Wotnot

      Well...

      I think you'd be surprised the number of "laydees" who love Job's kit! Of course they'd have more interesting things to do that hang around on dating websites, so yeah OK point taken!

    3. Aaron 10
      Jobs Halo

      Fan girl!

      My wife is a HUGE Apple fan girl after I gave her an iBook several years ago. She is more of an evangelist than I am now!

    4. Doshu
      Coat

      Well...

      I suppose it depends on your definition.

      I haven't had such a wtf moment since somebody told me about sexytrek.

      Wow.

      Just... wow.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Title goes here

    Ah a dating website for the beautiful people who own beautiful products.

    The red thumbs down button is just down there, m-kay...

  3. LINCARD1000
    Jobs Horns

    Uh...

    Eewwww? (although this counts for any sort of rabid fanboyism, not restricted to Appletards).

  4. blackworx
    Coffee/keyboard

    "Be the first to post a comment"

    Should, for this story, read: "Be the first to post a vomit."

    *bleuGHHHHH*

  5. Thomas 4
    Flame

    Oh God...

    I'm crying real tears here for the gene pool of human race. My sole consolation is that the ratio of men: women is proportional to the number of police officers needed to arrest a Gizmodo journalist.

  6. fifi

    ifancy?

    It's been done before.. iFancy is an iPhone OS only dating platform.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    bwahaha

    if I'm ever in need of a smug partner with an over inflated view of their choice of technology and a turtleneck I'll know where to go.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      Turtleneck?

      I've always been told it's a useless bit of skin, hence some remove it out of medical necessity or religious doctrine...

      However, I would imagine an Apple dating site would appreciate form over function.

      *(although it should be said, whilst Apple PRODUCTS are generally good-looking, I've never met an Apple USER who could be described as aesthetically-pleasing)

      1. Ivan Headache
        Happy

        I've never met an Apple USER who could be described as aesthetically-pleasing

        You obviously haven't met some of my clients.

        legs up to armpits (and bank balances to match)

    2. Wake up befor you sleep thru windows last crash...
      Jobs Halo

      Smug or RIght?

      People who are right a lot seem smug if you have made the wrong (cough, Windoze) choices in your life. Just saying...

  8. Jimmy Floyd
    Coffee/keyboard

    Aha ha ha ha!

    Aha ha ha ha! Oh ho ho ho ho ho! Haw haw haw! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

    Oh dear me.

    <snort> ha ha ha ha! Aha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Mmm.....

    But wait! Won't somebody think of the (potential) children?!? That's not funny.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Judge: so what is the reason for the divorce?

    wife: I found him using a HTC phone... and he said he liked it more!

  10. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Just so long ...

    ... as they never reproduce

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      No worries

      They'll have to get approval from His Steveness before creating derivative works. Ain't gonna happen, too much <censored> involved.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      the relevant interface

      is not supported by apple users

  11. The_Police!
    Troll

    How soon

    before the trolls appear?

    1. The First Dave
      Grenade

      @The_Police!

      Had a look in the mirror lately?

  12. PhonicUK
    Joke

    If the users are anything like Apple...

    Everyone will look great, but require that you spend twice as much on gifts and dates as anyone else. They'd also not allow you to have any friends that aren't members of the site.

    Also if your relationship ever had a problem, you'd never be able to fix it yourself - and instead would have to replace the whole relationship.

    1. Doug Glass
      Go

      Yeah ...

      ... but at least there would be no fighting over mirrors, or the shower, or deodorant or ...........

    2. Seanie Ryan
      Grenade

      ahem.

      kinda like my life already....

  13. BigRedS

    Apple's idea of sharing...

    I did love this line:

    "Cupidtino will launch in June 2010 exclusively on Apple platforms – Safari, iPhone and iPad apps. It’s time to share the love."

  14. Daniel Bennett
    FAIL

    Amazing....

    503 Error

    Resource limit exceeded

    If you are seeing this page, your site may be exceeding the allowed resources on the server. It could also mean your Mongrel instance has stopped. Please contact support for further information.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Ugh.

    How about using some of those amazing design skills and aesthetic taste which Apple fanboys are so fond of claiming they have?

    Or does Safari "magically" make light-grey text on a white background readable?

  16. Doug Glass
    Go

    And This Time ...

    ... remember to bathe.

  17. Chris Hatfield

    oh dear

    Wow, talk about a niche audience. I suppose they are freaks and it's good that they can find each other this way.

    As much as I love Apple, I don't profess blind allegience. I will certainly criticise them and am very much aware that we can look like twats to outsiders.

  18. Stone Fox
    Stop

    stuff ID cards

    sometimes I think people should need a permit to breed...

    I wonder if there's a way to include Sterilisation in the T's & C's?

    1. Pete 2 Silver badge

      Unnecessary

      They'd never manage to breed --- unless someone writes an app for it.

      1. Doug Glass
        Go

        Oh They're Everywhere

        The problem is you just can't walk in the room and turn on a light. Do that and they all scurry for cracks and crevices.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    <title>

    "Also if your relationship ever had a problem, you'd never be able to fix it yourself - and instead would have to replace the whole relationship."

    Isn't that what a lot of people do anyway?

  20. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    If ever there was a gene puddle that shouldn't breed...

    ...it's that gaggle of troglodytes.

    My DNA is going to cry itself to sleep over this.

    1. Doug Glass
      Go

      What Do You Get If You Cross an Apple Fanboi With A Gorilla???

      A retarded Gorilla.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Up

        Title Required

        My name is AC and I approve of this.

  21. Naughtyhorse

    1+1=2 2+2=4 4+4=8 8+8=16.......

    OK Fanboi so, you got yourself a gurl (iRoofies i guess)

    no idea how to interface the software with the firmware?

    it's ok, theres an app for that.

    oops ther was an app for that St Steve pulled it last week :-(

    gene pool saved

    paris cos this post is a knob gag too

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who needs this?

    I just cat sweet nothings to their /var/mail

  23. Tony Paulazzo
    Happy

    The title.

    >and of course a love for technology<

    As in sealed boxes where you're not allowed to peer beneath the surface, change batteries or smoke near? Still, 10 hours between charges... http://ifitshipitshere.blogspot.com/2009/06/if-apple-made-sex-toys-jimmyjanes-usual.html (NSFW).

    'Ignore the man behind the curtain!'

  24. deadlockvictim

    mac love

    Power Mac 8100/80 with G3 Upgrade and all of the power of a Nubus Jackhammer seeks cute Titanium MacBook for networking, Localtalk and possibly more.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    iSecks

    New meaning....

  26. Doug Glass
    Go

    Fanboi Dating is Like Dogs Chasing Cars

    If they ever caught one they'd have no idea what to do with it.

  27. Doug Glass
    Go

    It Will Prevent STDs

    Everybody knows Apple is immune to viruses. Or is it they just can't figure how to "plug in" since a typical Hoo-Haa has no magnets embedded.

  28. Doug Glass
    Go

    May Not Publish This One

    I guess now the expression will be to "job off".

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    MacHeads film quote

    "I have never knowingly slept with a Windows user OK! That would simply not happen!"

    I own Macs' and it's nice kit, but f**k me there are some fecking freaks out there and Apple kit seems to attract more than it's fair share!

    Listen fanbois, IT"S ONLY A TOOL. APPLE KIT IS NOT A LIFESTYLE CHOICE!

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It could work...

    I'm in a mixed marriage - my wife is a Mac person; I'm a PC person. And she's a Catholic and I'm Jewish.

    Luckily we're both cat people, so it's worked out OK. That said, right now she's stuck with a ThinkPad, since her 2004-vintage iBook had a motherboard die. I replaced it with another one of the same age; its motherboard died a day later. That said, she -was- using a Toshiba laptop of mine, until *IT* died, too. Power brick.

    The funny thing is that when I met her, her soon-to-be-ex boyfriend was a hardcore Mac guy, and being a 19-year-old in a... competitive environment, I humiliated him for it around our friends at any opportunity. And we know how -that- ended. VICTORY!

    I'm far less antagonistic toward mac users since OSX; it's not a bad OS and finally lets Mac users get under the hood if they want. To be ragged on for having the inferior technical platform when Mac users still had no pre-emptive multitasking and had to set memory usage manually per-application was a bit rich, but aside from price there isn't much to choose from the hardware and OS themselves now.

    Steve Jobs' attitude and the smug marketing are another matter - but my wife likes Macs for the platform, not for the hype. Amazing, eh?

  31. Paul Roff
    Coat

    Safety First

    It will be safe for women on there as the blokes will not be able to Flash.

  32. Rick Brasche
    Thumb Up

    oh there will be "women"

    especially of the type that expect their marks...errr..potential mates to have a certain amount of easily disposable income and are more concerned with appearance than output.

    And yes I own a 3GS. So I can join up, get gold-digging bimbos who then get mad when they find i don't have the cash they expect to siphon? :P

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    typo...

    "Fanbois who really are desperate to find that perfect dock for their iPod"

    surely that should have been "find that perfect dock for their iProd"?

    Yes, yes, I'm going. No need to push....

  34. Wallyb132
    Coat

    Title....

    This site is going to quickly become a gay parade, but thats what the creator intended didnt they? considering most fanboi's are gay, the only separating factor being some still hide it...

  35. Dan_Hibiki
    Flame

    Excelent

    Now that they're on a list it makes things so much easier.

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    linux equivalent

    A penguin rookery .. where males can sit on their eggs.

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It could be worse

    I'm trying to imagine the Windoze version...... or worse still the Dell one.....

  38. Morpho Devilpepper
    Jobs Horns

    This is just the beginning

    Who here doubts that this is but the first step toward Steve making it mandatory that all romantic match-ups between Macophiles be personally approved by him?! It's like the Salvation Army, only with tacky black turtlenecks.

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