Brazilians ordered to have more sex Brazil's health minister has agreeably proposed that more nookie could help the population combat the effects of chronic illness. José Gomes Temporão used the launch of a campaign to prevent high blood pressure to warn of a health "time bomb" which within 20 years would see a good whack of Brazilians suffering hypertension, …
never hear governments promoting anything that's actually fun.
It's always "marijuana, you can't do that, but how would you like to fill in a tax return instead?"
or "eating tasty food? - you shouldn't be. Let us take your mind off it by bankrupting the nation so that you can't afford to eat"
but never "have sex" because if people did enjoy themselves the government would have to make a law against it. I won't be surprised when the day comes that consent needs to be given in writing, along with a full description of the desired sex acts, 6 weeks in advance of intercourse and at a dedicated time slot so that a PCSO can record it and make sure you don't discriminate against your partners racial sensibilities. And if you fail to get the form signed by your local MP it's off to the chokey for you.
By that time PCSOs will also carry a taser and tear gas "for your protection" so you can be sure he'll aim for the goolies if at any point he feels you are thinking about children while shagging.
"so you can be sure he'll aim for the goolies if at any point he feels you are thinking about children while shagging."
Thanks, El. Reg for promoting the 'Reverse Cowgirl' - makes the target much harder to aim at.
(Will the PCSO be 'Thinking of the Children' while 'observing'?)
Lester, you lucky b'stard. You always get the juiciest stories....
This is an exceptionally good initiative. I can't agree more with this idea. To that end, I will offer my services to any hot bit of Brazilian totty (with a Brazilian, of course) in the interests of extending their lifespan.
Send full-length, scantily-clad photos to yesiwanttolivelonger@el-reg.org.uk.blart
Anyway... I think the advice probably stands that sexual intercourse usually isn't good exercise because it doesn't last long enough. You want something that takes at least twenty minutes to do, not counting the bargaining (I mean "I'll do the washing up tonight darling" and not "How much for twenty minutes"). And three or more times a week. Well, there you are then.
I can imagine some kind of machine that makes it more of a whole-body physical effort, unfortunately I don't know how to stop imagining... and of course I'm not including the bicycle ride to get there.
Safe sex or "safer sex" is of course an importantly better health choice than not-especially-safe sex, even with antibiotics available for a lot of the things you could catch, I don't know if that's particularly so in Brazil, and pregnancy itself is a rough ride although avoiding it isn't an absolute rule.
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