back to article 'Promiscuous slapper fruitfly sluts prevent mass extinctions'

Hot hot news from the world of insects this week, perhaps with insights to be gleaned into the conduct of human relations. It has emerged from research on the sex lives of female fruit-flies that the practice of remaining faithful to just one bed partner is fantastically genetically unwise and can render an entire population …

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  1. Disco-Legend-Zeke

    Our Human...

    ..."royalty" is so much better.

    Of course it is nice to believe that our leaders are concerned for the welfare of the society.

  2. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

    I hope those fruit flies are over 18

    Think of the dirty minded censoring politicians.

    1. Allan George Dyer
      Boffin

      days?

      Fruit flies reach maturity in about 2 weeks, and die in about 2 months.

      Any chance of getting rid of politicians in two months?

  3. Nick Davey
    Welcome

    Evolving Ants

    Well, surely if they continue to "evolve" their society in similar patterns to humans I, for one, welcome our new Ant overlords.... etc...

  4. Anonymous John
    FAIL

    Not one of the best

    El Reg Playmobil reconstructions.

  5. Uk_Gadget
    Paris Hilton

    Hey....

    ....most of my ex-girlfriends were born again fruit flies...

    Paris cos she is a wannabe fruit fly..

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Are

      you sure we didn't have the same g/friends ?

  6. ian 22

    Would it be A Good Thing if...

    ... selfish MPs were slaughtered by gangs of enraged navvies? Seems to work for the ants.

    1. Rasslin ' in the mud
      Black Helicopters

      @ian 22

      Likewise most state and federal guvmint tw*ts in the former colonies.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Mummy's little baby, Daddy's little maybe

    Well to geneticists it is well known that a not insignificant percentage of children are not the off spring of the mothers "normal partner"

    Research suggests that while men are programmed to bonk anyone they get the chance, women are programmed to find a good father to help her look after her brood and then when fertile to go out and find a good father to sire them. So perhaps there are genetic reasons for this in humans too.

    In many societies there is a certain amount of interbreeding. Infidelity here probably keeps the gene pool fresh.

  8. Barbara in Austin
    Megaphone

    Royal B.O....

    "Poorly understood negotiations between the rival aristocrats and the worker mobs are apparently carried on via the traditional ant communication medium of B.O."

    As I suspected!!!

    Deodorants block the human ability to communicate!

    I smell corporate conspiracy...

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Insect furniture

    "It has emerged from research on the sex lives of female fruit-flies that the practice of remaining faithful to just one bed partner is fantastically genetically unwise..."

    Thanks for this illuminating and instructive article. Until now, I had no inkling whatsoever that fruit flies even had beds.

  10. Andus McCoatover
    Joke

    Where were the promiscuous fruit-flies from?

    Essex, by any remote chance? What they're mating on looks awfully like the material of the back seat of a Ford Escort..

    Oh, El Reg. What've you done? Forget reverse cowgirl, we've now got the "fruit-fly position". Mercifully, my missus' rump isn't (proportionately) that big to allow such gymnastics.

    I can put a beer-glass on it when we're standing in the pub, however...

  11. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Rumcajz
      Boffin

      NSFWFI

      Not Safe For Work For Insectophiliacs, perhaps...

      1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

        Re: NSFWFI

        Mouseover, innit.

  12. Barbara in Austin
    Big Brother

    Deoderant Conspiracy

    It's the "aluminum illuminati" at work....

  13. Dr Patrick J R Harkin

    Wow.

    It's like the Big Brother house, only smaller.

  14. Herby

    Fruit Flys ≠ Humans

    Unfortunately for the males of the human species. (*SIGH*)

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