back to article WALL-E spaceliner smart hoverchairs debut in Japan

Japanese robot boffins - that is, human roboticists - have created a smart air-cushion hoverchair in remarkable WALL-E fashion. The chair's makers are touting it initially for use by the elderly, rather than the intergalactically indolent. CNET reports that the chair, developed by the Osaka Robot Lab, features a sportscar- …

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  1. Owain 1
    Unhappy

    Spoiler

    You've ruined my 4 year old's day.

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Spoiler

      It's been out for ages - I don't think the rule of spoilers still applies. Also, far be it from me and all that, but what's your four-year-old doing reading the Reg? It's all swear-words and aggro around here, you know.

      1. Tim #3

        well...

        In a couple of years time they'll be hanging around the shopping centre in a hoodie they'll at least know some of the basics, so it sounds excellent training, innit.

    2. Disco-Legend-Zeke
      Pint

      Thanks To The Miracle...

      ...of NETFLIX, i punched up WALL-E and watched it right away.

      It was an enjoyable little film that i would have missed. Of course the real problem in Space is the opposite, bone loss. A secondary problem with bone loss on the ISS was that all that calcium ended up clogging the urine recycler.

      Thanks elReg, i would never have watched the movie without the article.

  2. eezatehgeeza
    Headmaster

    PC?

    surely with "differently-youthful" in there, it should also read "otherwise-abled"?

    1. Cameron Colley

      You missed one: "manpower"

      Should surely be "personpower"?

  3. Elmer Phud
    Alien

    Can it go up stairs?

    Doubt it but I can see care homes for the rich being overrun with old folks screaming 'EXTERMINATE!' at each other.

    Davros is back.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    At last...

    ...we leave the darkness and enter a new dawn. For generations the elderly have had to make do with being supported by a cushion of mere cushions. Now they can take advantage of the very same technology that has made hovercraft the most desirable form of transport on the planet.

    Whether it be roaring up a shingle beach flaring vitimised shellflish and Channel flotsam behind them or caroming down the ward halls like an airhockey puck, tomorrow's partially mobile OAP will experience unparalleled freedom and amenity.

    Untethered from the soul smothering predictability of the wheel, tomorrow's elderly can drift easily down, along, across and around the city streets - assured that minimal friction and the laws of motion will make "traditional" road collisions a thing of the past .

    How lucky we are, to live in such times!

  5. Neil 6
    Paris Hilton

    WOMEN...

    ...know your limits

  6. Evil Auditor Silver badge

    Rerouting?

    "by following special magnetic tapes laid on the floor"

    Aha, there's potential for some BOFHinary! (May Lucifer rest his soul.)

  7. lglethal Silver badge
    FAIL

    Sorry but this is a solution looking for a problem

    The whole difficulty with moving obese/otherwisely-abled people around is not the actual moving them from A to B - once you've got them in a wheelchair even a small child can push them around. The trouble is getting them in and out of bed and on to the various tables (operating/CRT/etc) as required. This device does not help with this so does not help the nurses...

    Sorry - cool idea but useless for helping in the role described...

    1. heyrick Silver badge

      Lifting patients...

      ...it is about as quick as molasses, but the Japanese have a 'bot for that too - go YouTube, or eyeball the El Reg archives.

  8. Bill Fresher

    Error

    "Those who have seen WALL-E will recall that the human race, having fled its junk-littered mother planet aboard an enormous luxury spaceliner"

    I think you'll find there were numerous luxury spaceliners but the story focused on only one of them.

    Thanks you.

    1. JeffShortland
      Thumb Up

      I guess just the one powered by a Mac...

      The Axion, Jewel of the Buy&Large fleet.. Maybe the other ones just had bad driving..

    2. TimeMaster T

      Any bets ...

      Any bets on how soon we'll be hearing about a WALL-E 2? You know someone is working on a script involving the other ships.

  9. Disco-Legend-Zeke
    FAIL

    The Last Thing...

    ...you would want in a hospital is somebody with a leaf blower stirring up the staph infested dust for all to breathe.

    1. Evil Auditor Silver badge

      Re stirring up staph infested dust

      It's called assisted selection (as in natural selection). Anyway, once you're in hospital you may ask yourself whether your natural time to bite the (infested?) dust is already past. And don't bother me with objections about medical staff, visitors and such. The very same is true for them, just on a different level.

      (No, you don't die of cynicism. Years and years of experience proved cynicism is _not_ lethal. At least not for the one who bears it.)

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    How simianist of them...

    "Special powered smartchairs - though of wheeled rather than hover design for now - are said to be lightweight enough that "even a woman" can easily load or unload the wheelchair to or from a vehicle"

    What about a monkey buttler???

  11. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    FAIL

    Floating the patient on a cushion of air

    would prevent bedsores, and I think was tried years ago.

    I suspect energy wise the making beds with some kind of towing thingy which could engage a mobile AGV would be a more cost effective solution. Although the DARPA style "Smart stretcher" has some attractions.

    Humans get more expensive over time. Anthing that eliminates the routine would be a good idea.

  12. Jon of Monkeys

    But

    WALL-E was a documentary on the pit falls of becoming too dependant of technology. Should we not learn from these lessons, so as not succumb to the same fate as our predecessors?

    Do not build the damn chairs!! We've seen what happens, arrogant fools!

    1. Steve Roper
      Big Brother

      Re: But

      1984 was a documentary on what happens when you let politicians and police gain too much surveillance and control over peoples' private lives. Have we learned from this?

      Soylent Green was a documentary on what happens when we let people breed without restriction. Have we learned from this?

      These "documentaries" aren't taken as warnings. They're used as instruction manuals, because people are stupid.

      1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

        Re: Re: But

        If one more person refers to 1984 as a documentary or variations on this theme I will go out in the street and bludgeon a randomly-chosen passer-by into unconsciousness with a special Blu-ray edition of V For Vendetta.

        1. bygjohn

          Watch out...

          In Doncaster that sort of threat will get you a jail term...

        2. Evil Auditor Silver badge

          I'd refer to 1984 as a documentary...

          just to see Sarah Bee going out in the street and so on. I won't mention it only because it's extremely likely that I'd miss that rumpus.

        3. Disco-Legend-Zeke

          Excuse Me, I Am From...

          ...the Department of History Correction.

          There is no such movie as 1984. Therefore you will surrender all copies immediately.

          It has also come to our attention that you may have "books" about. The Fire Department will be by to deal with that later.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    I don't know what to watch.....

    while sitting in my hoverchair. My choices are "Caprica" or a VHS copy of "Hello, Dolly!"

  14. foglifter
    Thumb Up

    Japanese chairs of the future

    I'm doing a documentary on Japanese robots and I shot some footage in Tokyo of a chair that cost 250,000 dollars US that the Institute of Robotic Technology built. The floor has a pattern so you can program the chair to go anywhere in the house using voice command. Like Wall-E.

    http://www.facebook.com/pages/J-Robot/140350212868

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    1984...

    ...was most definitely and allegorical look at the elevation of the collective, as Humanity, at the expense of, the collective, as humanity. Themes explored include freedom as an identifying characteristic of humanity being sacrificed in order to advance the goals of Humanity, and selflessness being taken to the extreme of action without self leading to a veritable singularity of selfishness - the "none" benefiting at the expense of the "all".

    In documentary form.

    I am willing to admit that some or all of that was bollocks, but as it may prove to demonstrate a causal link with any subsequent acts of civil disturbance, I choose to call it Research Bollocks.

  16. Mike Flugennock
    WTF?

    Nothing personal, and with all due respect...

    ...but am I the only one here who thinks that just when the USA has pretty much nailed down the crown for Weirdest Goddamn' Society On The Planet, along come the Japanese to snatch away first place?

    I mean, jeez... whale popsicles, self-mobile soda machines, robot sex dolls... now _this_?

    Aaaauuuuuugggghhhhhhh.

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