back to article US data firm blows s**t out of server

This will cheer up those backroom boys among you who've ever had a strong desire to let a server have it with an arsenal of weapons, but didn't have a Springfield Armory M14, Heckler & Koch MP5 or IMI Uzi to hand: Marvellous, and we offer a round of applause to keepgoing.biz, which promises to protect your data in …

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  1. lansalot
    Thumb Down

    hmmm...

    Big guns ! Big guys ! Small.... ?

    I'd guess so...

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Americans and their toys

    Meh.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    Well, hell...

    Huh - that's where I sometimes go to shoot. I hope to hell they cleaned the place up afterwards.

    BTW - that's an M11 in .380ACP (aka 9mm Short), not a Mac10, which is a .45ACP

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    No expense spared.

    Nice to see they pushed the boat out there, a crappy old Compaq Desktop EN that might possibly have been as advanced as a P3, a skanky old G2 ML370 rack mount that's missing it's front bezel and what looks like it might have been a HP P4 mini tower. Way to raid the junk room guys.

    I prefer the HP vids where they fire a .50 cal through an EVA or create a gas explosion in a server room and destroy kit that wasn't rescued from the bin.

  5. Andrew Moore

    Hmmmmmm...

    It appears to me that there wasn't any active comms to that server (or electricity for that matter) so I'm wondering how it was being backed up???

  6. Tzael

    Oh really?

    "We keep you going, no matter what happens!"

    So if there's a simultaneous attack against all data centers they use, plus someone finds out where the off-site backups are stored and blows them up, everything just keeps going? It sounds like the cloud dream come true, but is more likely an invitation for litigation with a strap line like that!

  7. 4HiMarks
    Grenade

    bulletproof hosting?

    If only those boys could be recruited to "service" some servers in Hong Kong and certain Eastern Bloc countries...

    1. Allan George Dyer
      Pint

      @bulletproof hosting?

      If you have the IP address and evidence for the ones in HK, I know exactly who to contact.

  8. Jon Green
    Coat

    We fired the CTO.

    It took six JATO packs, but it worked...

  9. Andus McCoatover

    And??

    'nuff said.

    Keepgoing.biz? Nah. Stick the backup copy on a DVD, and leave it on a train. It'll emerge in a newspaper office somewhere, from which, as history has proved that for a small fee it can be safely retrieved.

    Bloody pointless exercise. Rednecks shooting something that hasn't fought back. Yet.

  10. Tom_
    Stop

    losers

    What a bunch of dicks.

  11. Ian Ferguson
    Grenade

    I do hope

    they properly disposed of the equipment according to WEEE legislation afterwards.

  12. windywoo
    Grenade

    lol at the guns

    I too noticed the World War 2 guns. I am ashamed to realise that I know most of those guns names despite living in a country where they are quite illegal. Computer games are a bad influence!

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    KEEP GOING!!!

    WOOO HOOO !!!!

  14. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Grenade

    There goes the Zion mainframe

    They are working without earplugs and backstop?

    Badass.

  15. Bumpy Cat
    Grenade

    Quite an array

    And automatic weapons too, which are (IIRC) quite difficult to get/own, even in the US. Especially a 50-cal! What kind of outfit are these guys? Or where exactly in the US are they based?

  16. Christopher Martin
    Grenade

    America

    FUCK YEAH.

  17. /dev/me
    IT Angle

    "portable firepower" ?!?

    Should that not be 'Mobile Firepower', in keeping with IT jargon?

    They where sending packets to a server, afterall...

  18. wherrelz.com
    Grenade

    now they get fu*ked by the authorities for littering

    If they were in London, they'd have about 50 fines up the a*s - littering, pollution, making a nuisance, blah.

    Lucky bugs; felt great to see them screw the servers

    Missed out on the grenades, napalms and nukes, eh?

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    those guns know nothing

    One of them was holding the Tommy gun by the magazine!

    If they don't don't know what a forestock is for they shouldn't be allowed near guns (even American ones).

    Now if you had a Vickers MG, you could shoot up server racks for hours without stoppage*

    *that's stoppage of the gun, server performance would drop off rapidly

  20. Anonymous Bastard
    Grenade

    "and restores [data] completely in minutes"

    Restores it to what? There's nothing left!

  21. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    Hot Damn ....... Texans gone Wild and Renaissance Rogue ...Private Pirate?

    It is an interesting ambiguous business but with solid virtual based ethics, which would give IT a ..... well, Real and SurReal Advantage wouldn't be misleading.

    "What is you actually do in the war, Daddy? " .... is one of those questions which would have an answer worth listening to, if well articulated by VentureNetworkers .... http://www.vnetinc.com/Pages.aspx/About-Us-Overview.

  22. Witty username
    Thumb Down

    Tut tut

    Holding the thompson by the mag can cause jamming (not the musical kind) and cause a group of redknecks to laugh at your firearm ineptitude.

  23. Michael Chester
    Gates Horns

    Nice server...

    It would be a shame if something.... happened to it

  24. Bruce Ordway

    lliving in a country where they are quite illegal

    I wonder where they got those weapons? They are things I have absolutely no need for but, I want them anyway. I live in the midwest US where there are plenty of firearms but I've never seen any of those around.

  25. Joe Zeff
    Joke

    Grump

    Right up until the end I thought they were demonstrating a new way to dispose of sensitive data so that it couldn't be recovered. What a sham! What a disappointment!

  26. Mike S

    IT Guys with Guns

    These are the guys who can never let anyone get the last word in a flame war.

    I'll bet their online avatars are total badasses.

    Pretty pointless demonstration though. I guess our company doesn't need them because we have guards at our building's entrance.

  27. h 6
    Unhappy

    Recognize one?

    One of those guys used to our President.

  28. David Eddleman
    Grenade

    MP5?

    I don't see a MP5 in there. I see someone with what looks like a GSG-5 (with a real suppressor over the fake can that comes with it) shooting at the equipment.

    btw: most guns in the US are not suppressed or automatic. It takes a lot of paperwork and money to get automatic weapons. Most civilians who legally own weapons use simple semiautomatic or bolt-action/pump-action/lever-action weapons. It costs a lot of money (we're talking several thousands) to get a legal automatic sear or an automatic weapon and anywhere from a $200 to $400 fee to get approved by the ATF, not to mention requiring a Chief Law Enforcement Officer to sign off on it (or barring that, a trust, which is more money).

    Those hicks/yokels/rednecks/etc. that you see shooting automatics and lobbing grenades/cannons/etc. constitute less than 5% of the lawful gun-owning populace.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    @Andus McCoatover

    >>>Bloody pointless exercise.

    There has to be a *point* to having fun now? My - what a grey, depressing world you must live in. Oh, wait - it's England. I get it now :)

    >>>Rednecks shooting something that hasn't fought back. Yet.

    I seem to remember that they were good enough to have seen off the English pretty sharpish back in the day - hope your Orwellian surveillance-society is keeping you safe when you cower in your bed at night, forbidden from even punching a burglar yourself.

    God forbid you find a gun in your garden and try to do the right thing - get banged-up for 5 years, eh?

  30. Daniel Wilkie
    Grenade

    @Tzael

    To be honest mate, I think in your quoted situation, business continuity MAY be a moot point... Most of your employees would be dead, and America will be under invasion. Which UNLESS that simultaneous attack was carried out by us, would probably be bad news.

    Still, I need to look at business continuity... Perhaps I'll throw that scenario in the DR plan and use it as an excuse to see if I can get away with sentry guns, minefields, and an armoury in the server room...

    For emergencies of course...

  31. David Mullen
    Grenade

    Going 'Postal'

    You can now downsize employees safe in the knowledge that after they have returned and massacred the remainder you can Keep Going.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    When you absolutely, positively have to make a point ...

    ... you really can't beat a 50 cal !!!

  33. Pirate Dave Silver badge
    Pirate

    WRONG

    Network admins are between the lusers and the servers. I say these guys were shooting in the wrong direction...

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    RE Ian Ferguson

    What are you complaining about it looked like a pretty green data center to me.

  35. asdf
    Flame

    sigh Merkins not all Texan tools

    Is it me or did that video look like the tech geek equivalent to the guns and babes video Samuel Jackson is watching in Jackie Brown? Still just to let our euro readers not have the common misconception that America is a Judge Dredd society with everyone packing heat right out of the cowboy movies, most in America don't need guns to get a hardon. I have lived in some of the most gun friendly areas in America and in any decent sized city you very rarely ever see a gun and if someone has one you can guarantee they will get our overzealous redneck polices attention (one thing I do miss about living in Europe is how the people actually look at the police force for most part as helpful public servants instead of redneck assholes out to put the hurt on you because you ain't one of them). You just hear from the very loud lunatic fringe like the woman that was packing heat to her daughters soccer game legally and then was shot by her husband in a domestic dispute less than year later (http://www.pennlive.com/midstate/index.ssf/2009/10/gun-toting_soccer_mom_is_shot.html)

    Guns are their to protect you and it is lies that they increase your odds of dying of a gunshot wound by 42x if you have a gun in the house. Still I would rather the rednecks play with their guns out in the woods and burn off testosterone than bottle it up and blow up abortion clinics.

  36. Kevin Reader
    Grenade

    Eddie Shoestring...

    Eddie Shoestring... only needed a Baseball Bat when he reformatted his IBM Mainframe.

    British restraint. Those who lived through the '70s will recall that Eddie was an IT person before he became a Private Detective. He had become overwhelmed by a need to reconfigure the machine he worked with..... (grin).

  37. Will Shaw
    FAIL

    AMERKA!

    FUCK YEAH!

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Act your age

    not your show size, guys.

    (always wanted to say that)

  39. Dalen

    What I'm surprised at is...

    ... how they _legally_ got their hands on sound suppressors?

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Didn't someone already demolish a server or five on video?

    Didn't HP already do this, and rather better (HP-UX, Linux, NonStop, VMS, Windows restart times compared) a couple of years ago? June 2007 is when the "disasterproof" server video appeared on Youtube but they'd already done one for storage stuff.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMCHpUtJnEI for the "disasterproof" servers video

    http://h20338.www2.hp.com/enterprise/w1/en/solutions/storage-disaster-proof-solutions.html for the video and loads of in-depth backup material

    Disclaimer: I hate HP as much as you do, but just occasionally they get something nearly right.

  41. Fozzy 1
    Grenade

    Hang on a Sec!

    A group of gun totting rednecks are able to storm into our data centre, start shootin' the shit of everything in sight and according to KeepGoing.biz, I am supposed to happy in the knowledge that the company will be able to contyinue to function. Fuck that, fuck the servers, the backups and the company I'm getting the hell out of dodge

  42. Doug Glass
    Go

    To All Those Scared to Pick Up a Gun and Shoot IT

    It's like sex. Get out of the IT basement, into the sunlight and actually try it ... you might like it. For sex I recommend the kitchen ... lots of tables and counter space.

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Pint

    Restore in minutes?

    Interesting. Worth a test. I have a couple of TB waiting for just this to happen. And we have only a couple of dialin lines available for backup. Hello? Miss? Anybody there? Thought so... :-)

    But the demonstration was nice. Are they available for consulting? There's this customer, see, and their infernal IT sucks...

  44. Kimberly Burgess
    Grenade

    Best commercial ever,

    but I still wouldn't use their services. Sure they can abuse servers with nice weapons, but they haven't proven they can maintain data; only destroy hardware.

  45. Version 1.0 Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Let's take off and nuke 'em from space. It's the only way to be sure

    Shiny!

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    where do I begin?

    1) They actually got PAID to do that!

    2) They should have started at 88mm and got bigger

    3) I defy any real sys admin to look me in the eye and say they weren't a little big jealous!

    4) When they opened fire, I almost had a "happy ending" moment.

    5) That video was almost as liberating as the time I had my cell phone "accidentally" run over by a tank.

  47. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    hmmm

    I'm with the rednecks here, should I seek professional help?

  48. Glenn Amspaugh
    Pint

    Processors are tough

    I've never shot up a computer but I did take some old AMD and Cyrix processors out to the range. On one, I'd tried drilling through the brown ceramic coating over the chip but just scratched it with a high speed steel bit. Turns out a .45 ACP and 7.62 Tokarev both made the chips shatter very prettily.

  49. Andus McCoatover

    @AC 18:48

    "My - what a grey, depressing world you must live in. Oh, wait - it's England. I get it now :)"

    Er, no. I'm in Finland. True freedom. (Except from the taxman, natch! ;)

  50. asdf
    Flame

    Re: To All Those Scared to Pick Up a Gun and Shoot IT

    I agree shooting guns is fun and have very fond memories of hunting as kid back when we still actually had game in the midwest (before all the rich asshole yuppies showed up). It does suck that % .001 of the retards ruin it for everyone else. No need to worry about any gun bans though even the left is scared of that one and besides considering there is probably more guns than people in America it would take at least 200 years to get rid of the guns even if we banned em tommorrow.

  51. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    Simulated Depth Charge Testing

    Here's an example of a simulated depth charge explosion (what the US Navy calls a "Barge Test") showing that an ATCA blade chassis survived:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4XZ9nj3ST1Y

  52. dr_forrester
    Grenade

    And haven't we all...

    Had days we wanted to go do that?

    Off to send the video to MythBusters. No idea quite what they'd do with it, but I'm sure they could figure something out.

  53. Frank Bough
    Thumb Down

    I Really Hope

    there was no-one sneaking around in the woods beyond that rack. WTF is wrong with these twats? Consider another potential client alienated.

  54. David Eddleman

    Re: Dalen

    It's not that hard, depending upon the state you live in. If you live in a state that doesn't prohibit the use of suppressors, you just fill out a form, send it to the ATF, pay a fee, and there you go, you get a tax stamp to transfer or construct a suppressor to you. That's it. It's expensive, sure, but not that hard.

  55. MichaelZWilliamson

    It's a commercial

    Suppressors ("Silencers") can be bought easily in Finland and the UK, are readily available in the US but require a $200 transfer tax to BATFE. Full auto are available, but the cheapest start at $3500, and the .50 M2HB shown is about $35,000 (Plus the $200 transfer fee, plus ammo at $3.50 per round X 550 rounds per minute).

    Seeing as there were professional cameras around, and it's at a well-known range, I assume they did, in fact check the backstop (It looks like a range I use up here in Indiana, that has a 1 mile clear zone...which I need with the .50).

    It's a commercial. It's designed to draw attention, not be an accurate scenario.

    And the only people who try to compare firearms to willies are those with small willies who are jealous.

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