Coming to the pub for a quick pint lads?
"Womb-coked simians in banana-pellet munchies frenzy"
There's creativity, and then there's drunken babble. I think the juries still out on exactly which side of the line this headline falls.
Scientists in America have warned of a new threat to society, posed by a generation of middle-aged drug-addled monkeys with poor impulse control due to being exposed to cocaine in the womb 15 years ago. In the words of a searing announcement issued today by the Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center: Adult male monkeys …
That is so funny,
why didnt i get into research, i would have loved to be on this team.
can you imagine having a session with monkeys... (ok so thats mostly what you do),
but real monkeys man.... awesome.
i wonder if newer research incorporates the crap quality of coke these days into their trials.
'the monkeys on the Shit coke, tore both levers of the wall in a fit of rage.... no banana pellets for them, and they settled down as they had nothing better to do with their time..."
Hmm, you would think it would be obvious that inhaling burning vegetation into your lungs with much attendant coughing etc etc was going to be bad for you too, but its still taken 400 years and umpteen dead animals to convince a reasonable percentage of the human race..
[not disgusted with the reg, just felt the tombstone was appropriate...
Plz also note that the monkeys generally don't have industries either growing out of these traits (videogames, maybe?) or pandering to them ("get it now!"), whereas human apes would seem to be getting rewarded for bad behaviour as long as someone, somewhere is willing to tolerate/ encourage it in order to make a buck. (Yes, a constant stream of banana pellets would also seem to reinforce non- patience, but this is only one activity whereas most human apes are buffetted from all sides by adverts/ marketing/ "culture"/ ad nauseum.)
I can imagine it now:
laser lights, sparkling disco ball, loud music and female monkeys in sexy red skirts, high heel shoes and lipstick boogieing around their handbags with a few pimping scientist passing them coke. No wonder they dressed it up as a research project.
Do you think PG tips have the footage?
Laughing my head off...