back to article Web more popular than sex, says Intel

Large percentages of American men and woman would rather give up sex than be disconnected from the internet, chip giant Intel has claimed. The chip maker's internet usage behaviour study, which examined the behaviour of 2119 US adults, found that 46 per cent of women and 30 per cent of men would opt to go without a bonk for …

COMMENTS

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Web more popular than sex?

    Does this take the onanistic uses of the web into account?

    Paris 'cause she loves surfing.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    <title>Hello</title>

    the internet: £12.50 p/m (o2)

    snitch: 50 euro (amsterdam)

    first comment on the reg: worthless

    (logo: whatever)

  3. ratfox
    Happy

    Not getting any

    It's easy to say you prefer web, when you're not getting any... I wonder how many were in this situation.

  4. jake Silver badge

    Uh, no. Sorry, Intel ...

    The web is not more popular than sex.

    Rather, the web is more popular than current RealLife[tm] sex.

    At least according to most of the machines I get called out to fix ...

  5. Stephen

    the best part...

    is that those figures are almost inverted when it came to a big screen TV...

  6. lglethal Silver badge
    Joke

    This isn't news....

    All it tells us is what we all already knew - Americans are shite in the sack! And quite obviously have no life...

    What a surprise...

  7. The Fuzzy Wotnot
    Happy

    Hardly!

    Judging by the size of the average blocklist I recieve each day, sounds like most people are getting both, albeit in a sort of one-sided way!

  8. Tony
    Happy

    No

    Can't remember who said it but....

    "When it's good, it's very good. When it's bad, it's still pretty good" - you can't say that about the web.

    ...

    Perhaps the survey tells us more about the marketing people at Intel than about people's actual preferences. They might say they would rather give up sex, but it's easier to say than to do.

  9. Andy Worth

    Just wondering....

    Do these percentages roughly correlate with the proportion of the population who can no longer see their own private parts due to the size of their gut? Or in fact more likely, the proportion whose PARTNER can no longer see their own privates.....

    Although seriously it shows that the internet, like mobile phones before it (and TV before that etc.) has become something that a large section of people now see as a necessity in their life and not just a luxury. I remember when mobiles were considered a luxury item and now it seems almost nobody can manage without one. Likewise, net access used to be the domain of the geek, but now it's something that everyone needs.

  10. shay mclachlan

    What?

    What is sex?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Makes sense

    For some of the male population, the tinterweb is the only chqnce they will get of seeing a nakid ladee.

    Paris, Internet, Sex.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So, it

    "..found that 46 per cent of woman"

    Is that the top half or the bottom half..?

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Wow 2119

    That's comprehensive! With a population of over 305,000,000 this is a staggering

    0.000695%.

    The same taken obviously includes a huge number of people for whom sex and the use of the internet are mutually exclusive ( apart from the 5 finger shuffle )

    Guess it must be a slow news day.....

  14. Mat
    Paris Hilton

    Ha!

    For most people, giving up their internet connection *is* giving up sex!

    Paris because..................

  15. Martin Lyne

    Does this account

    ..for those of us where they are one and the same?

    A cruel choice, to be sure.

  16. Ken Hagan Gold badge

    Web more popular than sex?

    You mean "cheaper", surely?

  17. Stephen Gazard
    Thumb Down

    Communication more important than sex, then

    What most people know about relationships is that the communication is (in the long run) more important than sex. Perhaps if the study asked what people were doing on the internet then they might have a more realistic idea.

  18. Sceptical Bastard
    Coat

    Two points

    First, the report is from Intel. Well, they would say that, wouldn't they (with a nod to Mandy Rice Davis who knew a thing or two about rumpy-pumpy).

    Secondly, don't these people realise that for many geeks the internet *is* their sex-life?

    Mine's the one with the Cat5 cable dangling out of the pocket and the semen stain on the front.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Married?

    2 weeks is nothing...

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    You can spend....

    HOURS on the web if you're bored enough as opposed to two min.... *coughs* - never mind.

  21. Mitch Kent
    Joke

    a non-sex joke!

    Intel shouldn't be using polling, surely they should be using interrupts?

    Any coat will do, I'm in a hurry.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Up to"

    Perhaps call girls should advertise 'up to' 8mbps (mucky bonks per session) to your home and then only actually deliver 2.6, but charge you the same anyway?

    How would those kinds of punters react to that kind of business model, especially when the same damn whore is giving the bloke next door the full 8 every night of the week?

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