back to article Financial meltdown hits Hilton where it hurts

Poor Paris Hilton is the latest victim of the financial apocalypse which has ripped across our planet, with London clubs offering the talented amateur porn flick performer as little as £25k a pop to enhance their premises with her magnetic charms. That's according to the Evening Standard, which says last time Paris popped over …

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  1. Scott

    Much lower

    If that fee drops much lower she'll be able to open my local village fate. Just see it know "The Womens Institute welcomes Paris Hilton" free DvD with fate ticket

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well we are all tightening our belts

    has she been written out of the Hilton fortune, ironic as she seems to be the only one doing any work and is self made.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    25K in 10min?

    Isn't that the same rate as the drop in your average bank's market capitalisation?

  4. Disco-Legend-Zeke
    Paris Hilton

    I wonder if the marriage price has gone down.

    Through a intermediary i was once quoted $300,000 for a brief marriage.

    This was strictly for the publicity value, tho i genuinly respect the lady, and she thinks i'm cute.

    It's about time for the DISCO LEGEND brand to have a product.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    hang on...

    She gets paid to be at venues...??!! Surely Londoners aren't that stupid to realise that just because a tart walks into a club, it's then a hotspot...

    Surely...

    Please say it isn't so...

    The fate of the Economy is in their hands....

  6. Tony

    WTF??

    I seriously don't understand.

    Are these nightclubs seriously expecting to make more than £25,000 in extra business because people find out that Paris Hilton went there once because she was paid to?

    What exactly does she do to earn her £25k? Are we talking about some kind of Manumission-style live sex show? That is about the only way I could see this being worth the money (and I'm not even sure it would be worth £25k for that).

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who knew Paris had magnetic charms?

    I never knew the skinny bimbo had magnetic charms. Is that like Lucky Charms - the cereal? Paying Paris for anything seems so synthetic.

  8. dervheid
    Thumb Up

    That's no sign of times being tight...

    it just means her 'celebrity' is waning.

    She can really start to worry when the bouncer, sorry, steward, says "Sorry darlin' but yer name's not on me list, so yer not gettin' in." Or worse "Sorrry darlin' but yer names on me list and yer not gettin'in"

    Also known as 'Welcome to the Real World'.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One for the physics boffins

    'Well, it remains to be seen if Paris can survive on a paltry £25,000 or so a month, but if she does have trouble paying the rent we suggest she moves in with her new chum Katie Price, aka Jordan, who was recently spotted with our fave celebutard.'

    If you keep adding micro-celebrities together, do they eventually reach some critical mass beyond which they coalesce into someone we might just care about?

  10. Christopher Rogers
    Thumb Up

    25k for 10 mins?

    i'd hit it.

  11. Steven Hunter
    Go

    She wants to stay there permanently?

    Dear England;

    You may keep her.

    Sincerely,

    The USA

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Publicity. It's never bad.

    I have now heard of some London nightclubs that I hadn't previously. Paris will get the paparazzi (and I don't mean the Pope) outside the venue and pictures in the retard-friendly slebritti press, so chavworld will hear of "Movida" and decide they want to go there. They only need 1000 punters to spend £50 apiece for the marketing to have been worth it. It doesn't all have to be on one night.

    I expect she has to turn up at a predetermined time so the lensmen can get her on their memory sticks.

  13. Anton Ivanov
    Paris Hilton

    Re: WTF??

    You have not shopped in a supermarket lately, have you? Just look at the covers on the magazines at the checkouts and ask yourself this same question once again.

  14. Snake Plissken
    Paris Hilton

    @Tony

    The sheep who pay to get into the clubs don't know the likes of Paris have been paid to go there. They just think it is the latest cool place, so, yes, 25k of extra business is easy.

  15. David H Dennis

    Seems to me ...

    that people are just discovering that she's grudging in giving any value in return for her appearance fees, and that's pulling them down.

    I'm not even convinced that has anything to do with the recession, just her apparent obnoxiousness.

    D

  16. Andy

    checkout magazines

    it really does bother me that some people's lives are so empty that they cling on to these celebutards to bring meaning to their, so i guess, seemingly miserable existance.

    soap operas and tabloids can be brought into the same umbrella of "dumb britain"

    and the brain drain continues...

  17. Iain

    @Tony

    "Are these nightclubs seriously expecting to make more than £25,000 in extra business..."

    You bought a beer in a London club recently? I needed to re-mortgage just to get tipsy

  18. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Boffin

    @Mike Richards: A thought on Dark Matter

    Or they might turn into mini black holes (the kind that sucks up all surrounding money)

    Alternatively, I wonder if they constitute dark matter, i.e. the kind do not see because we do not WANT to see them.

  19. Shades

    RE: One for the physics boffins...

    Well, judging by the amount of "celebrity" based shows on TV I would, rather unfortunately, have to say no. Perhaps rather than just standing round doing very little (apart from propping up their flagging "careers") it would work better if we had them all running into each other... while holding pointy objects... y'know, to release their souls which will combine to make them an uber celeb!

  20. Peyton

    re: physics, dark matter

    Hmmm... a black hole is a sort of collapsed star... yeah, that sounds about right.

  21. Naadir Jeewa
    IT Angle

    Points of View

    "There is no IT angle to this story. What is it doing here? I am removing The Register from my bookmarks. Please cancel my subscription. I am also dissatisfied with today's weather. Please make the weather the way I like it. Goodbye."

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Footballers are a bargain

    At least these super highly paid footballers stay the whole 12 hours at these clubs What a bargain they turned out to be!

    Paris because she likes a quick in out.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    black hole?

    on the internet video it was green.

  24. Chris G

    I don't know about London clubs

    But here in Ibiza, the idiots pay 50- 100€ to get into the various clubs and a 300ml bottle of water costs 10-15 € and a magnum of Crystal shampoo is upwards of 400€. I know because I do close security for the filthy rich occasionally, which is much better, I get paid to go in and my litre bottles of water are free. So if London clubs charge anything like that kind of money, they'll make their money back pretty quickly. Also clubbers do seem to be impressed by minor celebs including some of the DJs who are often total twats.

  25. Jonathan McColl
    Coat

    Am I in the wrong job? No!

    The well-known hotel Paris Hilton (into which all sorts of people come) gets fortunes to attend night clubs where ordinary mortals couldn't pay for the wine if they were let in.

    Prime Ministers and Presidents who drop us into wars make fortunes lecturing how to do it.

    Politicians swan about the Med discussing Deep Matters with Russian oligarchs.

    People who don't speak English play in or manage football clubs for daily fees that beat my annual salary.

    Where is this recession we hear about? Oh, in my taxes, mortgage and Tesco bill. At least I'll have a solid future in the Scottish IT industry when all those others will be claiming Jobseekers Allowance.

    Pass me the one frayed at the seams...

  26. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    The real question...

    ...is how much it would cost to get Paris Hilton *and* Kimi Raikkonen to the same club at the same time. Hmm...

  27. kain preacher

    £25k

    For 10 minutes of work ?? That means I'd only have to work for one hour a year to get £1.5m Sign me up

  28. James Anderson
    Happy

    Oh aint it a shame

    its the same the whole world over

    its the rich wot get the pleasure

    its the poor wot get the blame

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    She wants to stay here permanently?

    Dear USA

    I understand you must be mad at us for some reason. Yes, you're probably justifiably pissed off at us, because there are probably loads of things over the past few years that us Limeys have done that have annoyed you: dragging our feet in Iraq, Simon Cowell, the way we openly fancy Obama more than McCain, our affection for irony, the stupid way we spell 'colour', etc, etc...

    But c'mon, this is just mean. This is just over the top. This is just WRONG, in so many ways.

    Look, OK, we're going to be big about this -- we're sorry. Really. We're sorry for whatever we did or said. We take it back.

    Please, please take her back.

    We promise not to be so ironic in future.

    Love (no, really, we do still luv ya)

    Britain

    (AC, because who the f**k am I to speak for an entire country?)

  30. Scott Mckenzie

    Err... Kain

    25k for 10 minutes

    60 minutes in one hour

    Hence 6 x 25k is the hours work...

    QED

    6*25000 != 1500000

    You'd actually need to work a whopping 10 hours to get that £1.5M

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    10 minute appearances

    Fame only lasts for 15 minutes.

    It looks like a classic "pump & dump" scam.

    I'll stop now.

  32. John
    Paris Hilton

    the IT angle

    Paris has her very own icon on here, so there's your IT angle. Without it we'd be lost and there would be much less user content. If I were El Reg, I'd consider reducing it's size; as she might charge £25k (about $45K) for it's use.

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