back to article Laser surgery ignites internal methane, burns patient down there

Tokyo University Medical Hospital has published a pair of reports explaining an incident that left a woman badly burned after surgery. The reports (PDF 1 and PDF 2) , which we've shoved through an online translate-o-tronic machine, tell the tale of a woman who last April underwent surgery known as a cervical conization. The …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    jeronimo

    Surgeons confounded by queer queef conflagration launched by laser

  2. Nattrash
    Trollface

    Lighter...

    So I suppose they never played with a lighter after having a curry or beans on toast..?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Lighter...

      Japanese curry != Vindaloo. You usually do not end up in a state ready for one state to orbit (if you put a lighter to your exhaust).

  3. frank ly

    Put a cork in it

    To have been left with noticable burns suggests a large amount of something flammable. Could it have been methane leaking from the other possible source? I'd imagine that people under anaesthetic do tend to relax.

    1. cray74

      Re: Put a cork in it

      Could it have been methane leaking from the other possible source? I'd imagine that people under anaesthetic do tend to relax.

      Other articles on this story blamed conventional intestinal gas, not "vaginal methane." They also note the fire spread to a surgical drape on the patient, which caused the worst of the burns.

      (Apologies for using the New York Daily Times as a "reference," but it had the pertinent details.)

  4. Inventor of the Marmite Laser Silver badge

    Back to work

    Enough of this fannying about

    1. TitterYeNot
      Coat

      Re: Back to work

      "Enough of this fannying about"

      Yes, please can we all grow up, this just isn't cunny.

      <Coughs>

      And I've heard of fanny farts before, but this is taking the piss...

  5. Black Rat
    Coat

    Laser ignites flatus?

    That's one way of starting a bush fire I guess.

    1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

      Re: Laser ignites flatus?

      I guess the local fire brigade were disappointed not to have been called to put the fire out

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Armageddon!

    Made me think of this. Urban legend but still amusing. (Not terribly SFW due to subject).

    Also Repoman. "It happens sometimes. People just explode. Natural causes."

  7. Hollerithevo

    Since when...

    ...do vaginas do anything with methane? Answer: never. I think this is 'tother orifice.

    And a bit worrying that female anatomy seems to be a mystery.

  8. Pen-y-gors

    Cue sub-Lieutenant Phillips...

    ooooh....Naaaasty....!

    1. Mike Shepherd
      Meh

      Re: Cue sub-Lieutenant Phillips...

      I suspect that the number of readers who understand that is fast declining.

  9. Stevie

    Bah!

    This "Laser Surgery" is playing with fire.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Laser surgery doesn't leave you in stitches, but...

  11. Steven 1
    Flame

    "vaginal methane" - there were two words I didn't expect to find next to each other when I set off for work this morning!!

  12. cray74

    Interesting voting pattern

    The first eleven posts abruptly got one thumbs down each. Someone seems offended by the topic. Or is 'butt hurt' the current appropriate expression?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Interesting voting pattern

      The downvoter is just being kind of a sore cunt.

  13. Alan Ferris
    Coat

    Pictures ...

    Or it didn't happen.

    GIFs would be more acceptable

    1. Mark 85

      Re: Pictures ...

      Err.. no... not enough eye bleach or mind bleach available to cleanse something like that.

      However, this is El Reg and Playmobil would work.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Pictures ...

      GIFs would be more acceptable...

      There's video of the Gertrude Greenfield incident.

      https://youtu.be/88nkEK7Rwfk

  14. MrDamage Silver badge

    Rectum?

    Sure did. Burnt that pussy to a crisp!

    *badom-tish*

    /coat

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Rectum?

      Playmobil was (one of) Lester's specialities. I fear he got a Viking burial on a ship crewed by small plastic shipmates.

  15. x 7

    Stupid story. The risks of methane leaks during surgery are well known. Two years ago I had my appendix removed rather urgently. On waking I found my right thigh had been shaved (besides other parts). On querying this I was told it was to enable good contact for the earth strap used to stop any risk of static igniting any escaping gas.

    Seems to me the most likely cause here is that the hospital failed to take basic safety precautions, and simple fart gas was ignited.

    1. Francis Boyle Silver badge

      "Stupid story" Definitely. Keep 'em coming folks.

    2. Manolo

      Either the one you asked was taking the piss, or not knowledgeable.

      Earthing is used for electrocautery.

      If static electricity could lighgt farts synthetic pants would be banned by now.

      1. x 7

        Manolo, I think you are wrong about my appendix operation

        There is a comprehensive set of instructions regarding the use of electrosurgery equipment at

        http://www.ast.org/uploadedFiles/Main_Site/Content/About_Us/Standard%20Electrosurgery.pdf

        and this comment stands out:

        "E. The ESU should not be used when the gastrointestinal (GI) tract is

        entered, such as during a colon resection. The GI tract contains flammable

        gases, such as methane that can be ignited causing a fire if the ESU were

        used. "

        I think that eliminates the chances of them using electrosurgery on my appendix

        However, having said that, the document does highlight a host of electrosurgery risk issues which could have led to the burns in this chinese case. So you may well have highlighted the cause

  16. Anonymous South African Coward Bronze badge

    insert a straw into the other orifice to keep back pressure low and minimize the mass escape of possible flammable gases?

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