back to article The planets really will be in alignment for the next month

Go buy a lottery ticket, dear readers, because for the next month the planets really will be in alignment. By an accident of celestial mechanics, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter and Saturn will all be visible from Earth for the next month and it will be just-about-possible to draw a straight line intersecting all five. …

  1. Neoc
    Alert

    Let me be the first

    ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Let me be the first

      Ewglu phln'slghn hngl'wi. Krha'gr br'clnuilha wgah'rly'ueh v'glua n'gl.

      1. Dan 55 Silver badge

        Re: Let me be the first

        Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwll-llantysiliogogogoch?

        1. The Calvinator

          So, what you're saying

          is that Welsh people are ancient evil entities from a dimension beyond human understanding

          1. Pompous Git Silver badge

            Re: So, what you're saying

            Welsh people are ancient evil entities from a dimension beyond human understanding

            Depends on where the humans are from. There was a Merkin couple eating in a restaurant in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwll-llantysiliogogogoch and arguing about how to pronounce the placename. To settle the issue, they called over the waitress and asked her. She said, ever so slowly, "Bur-ger-King".

    2. WraithCadmus

      Re: Let me be the first

      I'm a loyal worshipper, in the hopes that I will be eaten first.

  2. jzl

    Bring out the kooks, the imbeciles, and those who sat at the back of physics class.

    I'm girding my chakra and clutching my moonstone until it's all over.

    1. agatum
      Happy

      and those who sat at the back of physics class.

      Reporting.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Today's C'thulu forecast is...

      Intense thunderstorms, with a 70% chance of toad precipitation and mass insanity this afternoon.

      (I'd better grab my raincoat)

  3. Captain DaFt

    But...

    Will the Moon be in the seventh house?

    1. Mystic Megabyte
      Unhappy

      Re: But...

      It's a shame that a mass breakout of peace does not seem to be happening

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: But...

      Leeeeet the sun shine

      Leeeeet the sun shine in

      The suuuun shine innnnn

      Now youuuuur singing it tooo

      The suuuun shine innnnn..

      1. wolfetone Silver badge

        Re: But...

        The sun sheeeeeeee iiiiiiiiiiiiiine?

      2. Grikath

        Re: But...

        "Leeeeet the sun shine in"

        Cynically also known as the "Bend Over Deeper" song... :P

    3. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

      Re: But...

      For some reason in my head the lyrics always seem to be "When the moon is in the 7th house - and Jupiter collides with Mars..." (instead of "alligns") - which would be some sight to behold...

    4. Annihilator
      Go

      Re: But...

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iaCaEcMF86o

      Or the 8th house of aquarius...

  4. deadlockvictim

    Eye of Sauron

    Is there any coincidence that the Eye of Sauron will be making an appearance?

    1. Graham Jordan

      Re: Eye of Sauron

      I spat yogurt over my keyboard reading that. Funniest Reg comment ever.

  5. Ken Hagan Gold badge

    Note for northern readers...

    In our hemisphere, the arc goes the other way. Ta for the picture that made me stop and mentally stand on my head for a moment.

    1. Imsimil Berati-Lahn

      Re: Note for northern readers...

      I was scratching my melon for a bit over the diagram... Looking NorthEast??? Rising right to left??? Then I read on ... blah blah Australian blah blah... oh, okay. Got that. Moving on. HEADLINE NEWS: PLANETS APPEAR MORE OR LESS LINED UP ON THE ECLIPTIC!!! errr... yeah, generally they would wouldn't they? Ho hum.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: Note for northern readers...

        "HEADLINE NEWS: PLANETS APPEAR MORE OR LESS LINED UP ON THE ECLIPTIC!!! errr... yeah, generally they would wouldn't they?"

        Yeah, me is confused over this too. Not being an astronomer, I was under the impression form previous "astronomical event" type headlines that planetary alignments of note were when they line up in a radial line from the sun so from our point of view are " behind" each other.

  6. hplasm
    Alert

    In the hills above Dunwich...

    something stirs.

    1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

      Re: In the hills above Dunwich...

      That's the locals after a few too many pints of Broadside in 'The Ship'.

      1. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

        Re: In the hills above Dunwich...

        "The natives are restless tonight... this does not bode well..."

      2. Tom 13

        Re: the locals after a few too many pints

        Wait, I thought after a few too many pints you stumbled off into the grass to sleep then wake after winning first prize.

        No wait, that's the lads to the north. Never mind.

  7. Blofeld's Cat
    Coat

    I see ...

    "Jupiter's gone into Orion, and come into conjunction with Mars,

    Saturn is wheeling across infinite space to its preordained place in the stars,

    And I gaze at the planets in wonder, at the trouble and time they expend,

    All to warn me to be careful, in dealings involving a friend"

    My Horoscope - Michael Flanders

    1. Chris Leeson

      Re: I see ...

      There's not enough Flanders and Swann these days...

    2. hplasm
      Happy

      Re: I see ...

      ""Jupiter's gone into Orion, and come into conjunction with Mars,

      Saturn is wheeling across infinite space to its preordained place in the stars,

      And I gaze at the planets in wonder, at the trouble and time they expend,

      All to warn me to be careful, in dealings involving a friend"

      so in short, you may want to take an umbrella with you tomorrow. Summary- Rain of Fire.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The image looks interesting. But what's that massive glowing red cloud thing? I've never seen one of those in the night sky.

    1. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

      That's how an AZURE cloud looks from down under.

    2. jzl

      Red thing?

      You mean the yellow thing?

      That's the Milky Way. It really does look like that, but you need good eyes and a very dark sky. A camera which can handle long exposures helps too.

      1. Wilseus

        Re: Red thing?

        "That's the Milky Way. It really does look like that, but you need good eyes and a very dark sky. A camera which can handle long exposures helps too."

        You actually don't need good eyes at all, but you do need a very dark sky, so you won't see it from any town or city. I'm a keen astronomer and I've never seen it :(

        1. Pompous Git Silver badge

          Re: Red thing?

          You actually don't need good eyes at all, but you do need a very dark sky

          One of the very great advantages of living on a farm in southern Tasmania. I'm really not looking forward to moving into town later this year :-(

        2. Boothy

          Re: Red thing?

          I had a backpacking trip to South America a few years back, various countries, lots of highlights, and also included a few days up in the Atacama Desert.

          I'm not one for emotional outbursts (my gf reckons I'm a Vulcan), but the night sky views really did take my breath away (the lack of oxygen up their not withstanding).

          If you really enjoy your star gazing, that's the place to visit!

          1. Grikath

            Re: Red thing?

            You could on the old, slow Channel ferries on the night run. Especially if you could get the purser to Ignore you and got up to the roof.

            Then you hit the problem of not being able to pick out the constellations because there were too damn many stars... ( yes, luxury problem, I know... :P )

    3. hplasm
      Coat

      " But what's that massive glowing red cloud thing?"

      It's a cloud- but it's leaving rapidly...

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Plane

    There will be 6 planets visible -- including Earth. First time I saw all five planets billed as being in a line (which was also my first conscious spotting of Mercury) it suddenly struck that we're in that plane too -- we're all a part of the incredible celestial dance!

  10. Yugguy

    Yeah but no but

    They're not actually aligned.

    It's just angles of sight...

    1. The March Hare

      Re: Yeah but no but

      So a political alignment then?

  11. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Unhappy

    There is of course the usual caveat

    CLOUDS PERMITTING

    So far, they haven't

    1. Thecowking

      Re: There is of course the usual caveat

      I'm pretty sure it's illegal by royal decree to have anything interesting happening in the sky in the UK and not have thick cloud cover.

      Why do you think they're frantically building nuclear cloud factories? (You thought it was for the power?)

  12. Dr. G. Freeman

    Right then, time to launch the USS snooker cue.

    It's mission- to boldly pot Mercury.

  13. Any mouse Cow turd
    Alien

    Always Aligned

    The planets (except the funny far away ones) are always "in alignment" because they travel along the ecliptic, it's just our viewpoint doesn't allow us a full 360 degree view of the solar system.

  14. Quortney Fortensplibe
    Trollface

    ...By Any Other Name

    "...your correspondent has occasionally been able to pick out Venus in early morning light when it appears as a wonderfully spectral white circle in the sky..."

    So, almost like a "morning" "star"?

    1. Neil Barnes Silver badge

      Re: ...By Any Other Name

      Sometimes it has a black hat on. Then it's a mourning star.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Other stories you might like