Huh? Cat-wees-like-a-racehorse study pees on fellow physicists to take Ig Nobel prize Boffins, who – thanks to their bladder-poking research – busted the myth that racehorses urinate longer than other animals, have been awarded the physics Ig Nobel prize. Mechanical engineer at the Georgia Institute of Technology David Hu explained that he had been inspired to conduct the experiments after changing a baby's …
Except a mouse pisses really quickly... It takes about a second or so.
Male mice dribble constantly - so much so that there is a myth that they don't have bladders.
If this is the quality of the physicist's research, then I hope he's involved in nothing more important than climate "science".
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All(?) bees have barbs on their stings. They can only make one suicidal sting that tears off the bottom of their abdomen and they die.
Unlike wasps who have a needle shape that can be used repeatedly without apparent harm to the wasp. Possibly that is why bees are less likely to sting you unless they feel really threatened.
As someone who has been "shot" by paintballs on pretty much every part of the body you could care to mention, I can scientifically* confirm - ...drumroll please... - that, yes, the end of one's cock is indeed the most sensitive part of mythe body when it comes to localised trauma.
Man, that hurt. On the plus side though, it did swell up a bit, though not for long.
Do I get a prize?
"[,,,] the end of one's cock is indeed the most sensitive part of mythe body when it comes to localised trauma.[...]"
As probably most teenage boys discover it is also acutely sensitive to being sprayed with an aerosol deodorant. You don't repeat that mistake.
I would have thought the testes were the source of the most pain from a trauma.
"A team of boffins determined that acute appendicitis could be accurately detected by the amount of pain a patient experienced when being driven over speed bumps."
A friend was in a minor hospital recuperating from a bowel operation when he collapsed with internal bleeding due to the anti-coagulation drugs. He had to be rushed 12 miles back to the major hospital in a blue lights ambulance. He said the pain on every speed bump was intense.
He had been disappointed with the almost non-existent scars from his original keyhole surgery. They didn't mess about being delicate in the emergency operation - he is now suitably pleased with the trophy of a six inch navel scar.
While recovering from a back broken in three places, three broken ribs, punctured lungs and sundry other bruises and contusions, my spleen burst. After much running around (by other people), the next morning the doc arrived, took one look at my charts and said 'why the f*** aren't you in surgery?'
Three hours later I was the proud possessor of a scar from navel to halfway through the breastbone, and the breastbone still has a chunk out of it where he didn't stop soon enough.
(and on the original subject: since I saw the original research, I've taken to counting every time I pee. No, I'm not telling you; do your own counting.)
"Has anybody else timed themselves?"
Standard procedure when you get older and the prostate starts to be suspect.***
The simple medical test is a flow meter - that is just a weight sensing container that outputs a graph of the flow rate for the duration.
They also do ultrasound scans to measure (estimate) how much your bladder holds when you have drunk enough water to reach the legs crossed point. They then send you for a pee - and measure (estimate) the volume of how much you have retained.
The gold standard dynamic test is invasive with tubes stuck in various outlet orifices. They then fill you up through the catheter until you hit the must-go "urgency signal" point. They then record how much you pee, how fast, how smoothly, and the variation in internal pressures in the bladder. Interesting - especially when the specialist female nurse turns out to be a neighbour you know quite well.
You may then have to self-catheterise for a week at bedtime to measure the volume of any retention. That requires a little thought and experimentation for what are quite small volumes sprayedspread over a large target area. Hint: 1ml of water weighs approximately 1gm.
***Old people love to tell younger people about the joys waiting for them when they get old.
Ah, the metric system; where 1 ml of water at 20 degrees Celsius weighs 1 gram and takes up 1 cc of volume. It also takes exactly 1 calorie of energy to increase its temperature by 1 degree C. So much easier than the "standard" system in how its based off of some long-dead king and other archaic measurements...
"it also accounts for a stallion being slightly better hung than a tom cat."
The length/od of the penis is proportional to the depth/id of the vagina in Mammals, and has absolutely zero to do with quantity of urine. Trust me, pound-for-pound, our mares produce just as much urine as our stallions & geldings. Sometimes more (MUCH more!), when it's really hot out and they are in season.
THAT said, why was this research even given a grant? Anyone who has ever spent any time on a farm, or in a zoo, knows that. For example, every afternoon my 25 pound Whippet bitch waits to pee until one of us (usually me) brings my 1800 pound Stallion into the barn for the night. They were born about 2 months apart nearly 6 years ago, and have been best buds, ever since I allowed the puppy into the barn right after Herb was born ... They both start & stop peeing nearly simultaneously, every afternoon. I have never timed it. It's probably about 20 seconds.
(Why does Herb refuse to pee in his paddock, but waits until he's back in his stall? I have no clue. The Wife suspects it's a simple case of stage-fright ;-)
"The length/od of the penis is proportional to the depth/id of the vagina in Mammals..."
Not entirely in humans. Human genetalia have a very large tackle-to-body size ratio. It's to do with those ginormous braincases coming down the birth canal. That canal has to be big enough so the mother has a decent chance to survive the trauma, and evolution (having made the canal bigger) then had no choice but to (ahem) enlarge the male member proportionally.
"That canal has to be big enough so the mother has a decent chance to survive the trauma, and evolution (having made the canal bigger) then had no choice but to (ahem) enlarge the male member proportionally"
But if that were the case then the average human penis would be as wide as a baby's head...but its clearly not. Well, mine might be but I doubt if yours is. Could explain Catherine the Great though.
"The length/od of the penis is proportional to the depth/id of the vagina in Mammals"
A vet of my acquaintance claims that the hedgehog has the largest ratio of penis to body size of any mammal. The reason, while obvious, is slightly different from the assertion above.
Please, no Pratchett quotes. Pretty please?
"A team of boffins determined that acute appendicitis could be accurately detected by the amount of pain a patient experienced when being driven over speed bumps."
total bollox. Acute appendicitis is so bad that no amount of bumping could make it worse. If bumps DO make the pain worse, then the appendicitis isn't very acute......
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