back to article Audi RS3: Keep running up that hill, with no problems

On the June 6 1936, Audi – or Auto Union, as it was known at the time – first visited the Shelsley Walsh hillclimb course with its 550hp Grand Prix car. Rain spoiled Hans Stuck’s runs on the day, but in practice he had equalled Raymond Mays’ course record of 39.6 seconds up the 1.5km hill in rural Gloucestershire. Just over 50 …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I want one !

    Drool.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Dear 6x7=42

      I think you'll find 6x9=42

      1. Elmer Phud

        Re: Dear 6x7=42

        It was always that the question was wrong -- not the answer.

      2. Chris Miller

        6x9=42

        Demonstrating that God has 13 fingers.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: 6x9=42

          And I'm 22 in base 25.

          Oh how time flies...

          1. Chris Miller

            Re: 6x9=42

            Computer bods should reckon in hex, so I'm still in my thirties.

      3. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Nice silly maths sideshow chaps, but what about the lovely 5 pot ulticar ?

  2. K

    First generation of supercar hatches hit the roads in the early 2000s

    So I imagined that Sierra Cosworth that drove past me each day on the way to school in the late 80's?

    And i also daydreamed the Escort Cosworth that the fit-divorced MILF (my best friends mum!) used to drive in the 90's?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Trollface

      Re: First generation of supercar hatches hit the roads in the early 2000s

      Didn't you daydream to escort the fit-divorced MILF that used to drive the Cosworth in the 90's?

    2. Guy Swarbrick

      Re: First generation of supercar hatches hit the roads in the early 2000s

      You didn't imagine it, but it was a different beast. Yes, there were a few homologation specials - the Cossies, the Delta Integrale - but they were short runs of tamed Group A/N race cars rather than genuinely mass market lunatic versions of shopping trollies.

  3. a pressbutton

    Sierra Cosworth

    hm

    Fond memories.

    I was 15 ish and we had just finished breakfast.

    Knock on door

    Policeman to my dad 'Sir, do you own a sierra cosworth ...

    Dad (just about to leave for work) to Policeman 'yes it is in the front drive' ... pointing at an empty space

    Turns out it had been stolen for use in a ramraid but they lost control and hit a boots.

    The only car I have been in where you could drop it into 3rd at 110mph and get a wheelspin, whiplash and 130pmh before realising what happened - joys of the m11.

    1. RPF

      Re: Sierra Cosworth

      At 130MPH your engine would have been doing over 8500 RPM, so not terribly likely.

      Especially with barely more than 200BHP.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. a pressbutton

        Re: Sierra Cosworth

        It was a long time ago, but even so I remember my dad could change gear, sometimes quite quickly.

  4. fishman

    Golf R

    So how does this car compare with the Golf R - they are both built on the same VAG platform.

    1. joed

      Re: Golf R

      there you have it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3jWVTKYcP0

    2. Annihilator
      Trollface

      Re: Golf R

      "So how does this car compare with the Golf R"

      You'll get nearly £20K change if you buy the Golf R? Almost £50K for the RS3 is nuts.

  5. Detective Emil
    Megaphone

    Damn you, El Reg

    Now I've got to go and play some Kate Bush. Maybe I'll do it in the (rather more pedestrian) A4 (which does have the — rather nice — "sound package").

  6. Van

    Imagine being faced with massive depreciation of this Audi in an era where our roads simply can't do it any justice.

    Buy an old BMW Ti compact for £300 and turn it into a track car for 1/20 of the cost, inc a years running costs.

    1. werdsmith Silver badge

      Yes, Van. You talk much good sense.

  7. Dr_N

    Stationwagons

    All the RSs are stationwagons: Meh.

    1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      Re: Stationwagons

      Except for the ones that aren't?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    "Keep running up that hill, with no problems"...

    I wish I only could...

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Saw one today

    somewhere between Stow-on-the-wold and Cheltenham.

    Plod were in attendance as the RS3 was in a ditch. The RS batched back end was poking up out of the ditch.

    The driver? Looked about 12.

    Naturally, it was a black one.

    Sigh.

  10. werdsmith Silver badge

    Volkswagen Group. Not VAG. Vag is something that Peter Griffin talks about on Family Guy.

    MQB platform.

    How does it compare to a Golf? It's just as shit.

    1. hopkinse

      VAG

      It's actually an acronym that was used internally :-P

      1. caffeine addict

        Re: VAG

        It wasn't only internally - it may have been pre Skoda and SEAT, but didn't you used to take VW & Audi cars to VAG garages?

    2. Guy Swarbrick

      VAG was Volkswagen Audi Gruppe and is now Volkswagen AG (Aktiengesellschaft) - or Volkwsagen Group.

  11. IHateWearingATie

    A car for those of us who dream of speed. ..

    But have two kids and a boatload of crap to lug around. Had to sell the track fettled scooby so making do with an Octavia vrs :(

    Not sure this would get past the boss at that price though. May be getting another vrs or an s4 instead :(

    1. Carl W

      Had to sell the Scooby?

      What kit do 2 kids require that doesn't fit in the back of a Scooby? I managed perfectly OK. When the kids were 11 and 8 we managed for the next 2 years with a TVR Cerbera and a Peugeot 206CC, so two 2+2s.

      1. IHateWearingATie

        Re: Had to sell the Scooby?

        It was track fettled, so the ride was too harsh for the kids (but great for 4 wheel drifts around Silverstone).

        And my wife refused to drive it as the clutch was too heavy and throttle response too harsh for her.

  12. This post has been deleted by its author

  13. Fraggle850

    Shelsley Walsh is NOT in Gloucestershire!

    It's in the glorious rolling hills of the Teme valley in rural Worcestershire. The whole area is petrol head nirvana, gorgeous twisty b roads and a noteworthy annual vintage motorcycle off road hill climb and trials event at Red Marley.

  14. Kevin McMurtrie Silver badge

    1990 supercar came floppy disks in the glovebox

    Those article photos - What photo editor still does nearest neighbor resampling and two passes of one dimensional sharpening?

    So besides peak acceleration, how else is the car fast? I got new A3 2.0 Turbo as a loaner car recently. Extreme turbo lag, messy automatic shifting, and poor visibility made it anything but fun to drive. It was more like budget car that would rocket forwards after holding down the gas pedal for 1.5 seconds. Turbo boosted boring.

    I'll stick with my aging 2007 A3 3.2 Quattro S-Line. The paint is peeling but it drives like an angry beast.

  15. Just another badger
    Devil

    Soon to be

    found permanently occupying the overtaking lane of a motorway near you.

  16. caffeine addict
    FAIL

    Dear ElReg...

    Can you find whoever keeps saving these photos with such god awful compression, and batter them round the head with a boxed copy of Photoshop? The pics on page 1 look like they were drawn with an etch-a-sketch, and the interior on page 2 I had to check wasn't saved as a gif...

    1. druck Silver badge
      Unhappy

      Re: Dear ElReg...

      The make my eyes bleed.

    2. A Nonny Moose
      Facepalm

      Re: Dear ElReg...

      Absolutely this. If you're going to insist on using these horribly compressed images in the articles, at least provide a link to the full-sized, uncompressed version so we can actually SEE what it is you want us to look at

  17. hopkinse

    shocks and dampers

    "the trick shocks and dampers..."

    last time I noticed, shocks and dampers werer the same thing :-) Bit like pants and trousers....

    1. Guy Swarbrick

      Re: shocks and dampers

      Strictly speaking, the springs absorb the shock and dampers absorb the energy from the spring rebound and damp out the oscillation. But you're right - to follow convention, it should have said springs and dampers.

  18. naive

    Buy a car not a Golf

    Better spend the dough on a 335i, which does not kill you for repair bills after some years. Since A3's are all Golf clones, repairs will be virtually impossible, if Audi describes it as a Super car, expect Super bills, since there is no work space under the bonnet designed for 1.4TSI sized engines.

    1. Iain Cognito

      Re: Buy a car not a Golf

      Are you serious and are you referring to a BMW 335i?

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