The oracle knows all. Not THAT Oracle, of course

Genuinely out of interest and because it's a bit too much of a general question for Google, what corporate AV software would Mr Dabbs be referring to that can only be purchased in the thousands of licences? Assuming that wasn't an exaggeration of course! (or at least he was near). I've seen how ESET performed with the Cryptolocker virus, just sat there shitting itself while the virus happily sat there munching shared files. The question of the very best AV seems to fox everyone including me and there is never a very objective conclusive answer from any discussion. Does it really exist? Or is it just as bad as asking "Why?".

The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.

Your question was: “What anti-virus utility should I get?”

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

A clue.

What computer to buy?

One that you can get from a shop near enough to take it back to (so I don't have to fix it for you).

Adam Ant

Bum. I thought it was the dandy highwayman before pressing play.

Now I'm gonna have to go searching before sleep..

Curse you Dabs. I'm lucky if I train 4 women over the period of a year containing 450 IT professionals.

Software Training

Doing them in a French when all the material is in US English is fun.

Did I say fun? I meant shizz.

At least you don't have to lug around two bulky clip binders of OHP acetate slides anymore...

better than..

At least the quick question shows they care, about something.

Years ago I took over the job in my Local Authority of doing the training for schools' staff after the colleague who had done most of it left for a headship.

At which point I discovered the sad truth that about half at least were either determined not to learn anything, because they knew that if they did they'd be lumbered with the job when they got back to their own schools, or just didn't want to touch a computer because they only taught music/knitting/3 year olds.

And of the reminder a significant number were genuinely interested, but had no clue what they were doing there, or didn't have access to a computer, or were using Macs, whereas I and everyone else had the RM Windows PCs. that I was being paid a pittance by the LA to show them how to use.

I loved the ones that had a quick question. Even if there was a quick answer I'd give them the detailed one. Even knowing that the queue at the pub was getting longer I'd transfix them with my beady eye while I detailed how to format their WORD document or copy the floppy disc if they only had one drive ( or something like that, it was a very long time ago)

Hmm ...

I much prefer, "Ask a stupid question, expect a punch in the face."

Great article, as always.

What AV to get is an easy answer

Should have told her to download Microsoft's. It is free and should take care of most the stuff you're likely to run into. It isn't the best, but it is the path of least resistance and works well enough for 99% of us.

Also importantly it doesn't nag or try to trick you into upgrading to a paid version like most of the other "free" ones, or try to quarantine OS files when they haven't adequate tested a new definition they've rushed out.

“What Mac should I buy?”

The only Mac worth buying is a Big Mac.