back to article Taylor Swift snaps up EVEN MORE pr0n domain names

Not content with her recent purchase of ItaughtTaylorSwiftHowToGiveHead.com, heartthrob chanteuse Taylor Swift has been busy registering more porn domain names, most recently TaylorSwift.porn and TaylorSwift.adult. The latest buys are part of a public sale by the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers (ICANN), …

  1. Alister

    Maybe she's considering a career change?

    1. phuzz Silver badge
      Terminator

      She already has:

      https://twitter.com/SwiftOnSecurity

    2. Slacker@work
      Coat

      Maybe using the stage name Taylor Swallows?

      1. Lush At The Bar

        Fully Laden?

        But would she be fully laden? And if so, do we know what her air speed velocity would be?

      2. MrDamage Silver badge

        Taylor Swallows

        African or European?

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    office.porn?

    That's an abuse of trademark. "Office porn" is a very generic term and has nothing to do with Microsoft Office. So they shouldn't have been allowed into the exclusive pre-launch trademark registration money grab period.

  3. Arthur the cat Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Office.porn

    I shudder to think what might have been on this site if MS hadn't grabbed it.

    1. Afernie

      Re: Office.porn

      Clippy has already taken out an injunction.

      1. AlanB

        Re: Office.porn

        Scary fact - Clippy porn, sorry, "erotica", actually exists - http://boingboing.net/2015/03/17/an-erotic-novel-about-clippy.html

        1. Colin Miller

          Re: Office.porn

          Scary fact - Clippy porn, sorry, "erotica", actually exists

          Rule 34: If it exists, there is porn of it — no exceptions.

          Rule 36: If you've thought of it, then there's somebody out there with a fetish for it.

        2. Robin

          Re: Office.porn

          > Scary fact - Clippy porn, sorry, "erotica", actually exists

          And tetris too, it seems.

          I'm looking forward to the next book, about the saucy antics of Schmeve Ballmer and his magic chair.

        3. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Office.porn

          It looks like you're cracking one off.

          Would you like some help with that?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Office.porn

      It puts a whole new spin on the term "headless"

      Yes, yes, I'm leaving, thanks.

  4. Afernie
    Stop

    You have to wonder.

    Is Taylor Swift is aware of the Streisand Effect, and are she and her minions are possessed of enough imagination to find and register every filthy and innuendo-packed domain name that references her out there under every top level and in every language? She's liable to find herself the owner of a lot of domain names and out of the Forbes 100 rich lists.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: You have to wonder.

      The term "too much money and not enough sense" springs to mind.

    2. Tom 38

      Re: You have to wonder.

      I doubt Ms Swift is even remotely aware that this is happening. She generates (metric) fucktons of money, and there will be an incessant number of companies and people constantly thinking of ways of relieving her of it helping her deal with these sorts of things.

    3. Stuart Castle Silver badge

      Re: You have to wonder.

      In fairness Taylor Swift's music is marketed at teenagers (whether you like her music or not, it is a fact that it's marketed at the young). As such, she (or her management) has to protect her image. This is probably why while you will see her in a (seemingly) carefully orchestrated relationship with another pop star, you probably won't see her falling out of a club at 4am off her tits on Coke.

      Websites associating her name with various hardcore porn acts will damage the image and often the easiest (and cheapest) way to stop them is prevent them ever being registered.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: You have to wonder.

        Sorry? What you're saying is that teenagers aren't into porn?

      2. I Am Spartacus
        Paris Hilton

        New business model

        I think I have found my own golden goose:

        1: Think of a new Taylor Swift-based domain name.

        2: Register it

        3: wait for her lawyers to want to take control

        4: sell it

        5: P R O F I T

        6: go to 1

  5. Simon Harris

    There ought to be a rule...

    If you're going to buy up a .porn domain, you should damn well put some porn on it!

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

  6. Otto is a bear.

    Perhaps

    Those sales boys at ICANN are the smart ones, create some FUD in a celebrity and sell lots more domain names than you would if you left it alone. I wonder if they have a group that thinks up the domain names first, "D'ya think we can get Taylor to buy this one......"

    Should I buy lots of Bear domains to protect my reputation, but may be not, after all what could possibly be misconstrued about Bears.

    1. frank ly

      Re: Perhaps

      I'm making an animated cartoon about you doing something in the woods.

  7. Pen-y-gors

    Emma Chisit?

    Anyone know how much .pr0n domains will cost for everyday amateur buyers?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    revenge.pr0n would be a good portal for disgruntled exes to post the smut

  9. Chris G

    But

    I really did teach....oh, I can see a lawyer coming this way!

  10. Tom 35

    More like - pre-emptive opportunity for brands to stop trolls -and legitimate protesters- claiming their trademarked names.

    Buy up all the xyzSucks domains before your customers do!

  11. MrXavia
    Childcatcher

    I've always been against these new TLD's I don't like them or see the point really...

    they are just a money grab...

    because all you will have instead is things like

    taylorswift.donkey.porn

    is taylorswift.porn any worse?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      They seem to be trying to get them all.

      taylorswift.horse has already been taken.

  12. This post has been deleted by its author

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is taylorswiftsucks.porn taken yet? Or, taylorswiftporn.sucks ?

    1. ukgnome

      Excuse me but....

      What's whiftsucks?

      And why would the Harrogate coffee company be doing it?

    2. Swarthy

      Or simply taylorswift.sucks

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        ittaughttaylorswifttogivesplendid.sucks

        5 seconds with a thesaurus gives a few alternatives for 'splendid':

        acceptable

        bad

        excellent

        exceptional

        favorable

        great

        marvelous

        positive

        satisfactory

        satisfying

        superb

        valuable

        wonderful

        ace

        boss

        bully

        capital

        choice

        crack

        nice

        pleasing

        prime

        rad

        sound

        spanking

        sterling

        super

        superior

        welcome

        worthy

        admirable

        agreeable

        commendable

        congenial

        deluxe

        first-class

        first-rate

        gnarly

        gratifying

        honorable

        neat

        precious

        recherché

        reputable

        select

        shipshape

        stupendous

        super-eminent

        super-excellent

        tip-top

        up to snuff

        ...we could probably bankrupt the poor girl in a single forum thread.

  14. CaptainBanjax

    Cant wait

    For a pop star called John Smith to try this.

  15. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge
    Gimp

    ITaughtTaylorSwiftHowToShoveAHamsterUpHerArse.com

    Surely the whole "I Taught..." battle is a game of whack-a-mole with the lawyers having to be more perverse than everyone else to get in first and inevitably doomed to failure.

  16. Craigness

    TaylorSwift.porn

    Glad she got that one. I'd hate to go to TaylorSwift.porn and see anything but the real thing.

    I'm pretty sure KelisTaughtTaylorSwiftToGiveHead.com. But she had to charge.

    1. PhilBuk

      Re: TaylorSwift.porn

      Have a milkshake.

  17. Bloodbeastterror

    Who TF...

    ...is Taylor Swift and why does anybody care? FFS!

  18. John Tserkezis

    I was going to say, if things get any worse, Swift will need to get her PR team to sack her legal team.

    But after what I've seen so far, she should sack her PR team as well.

    For that matter, she should sack herself, just to be on the safe side.

    1. MrDamage Silver badge
      Coat

      Sacking?

      Is that some new form of teabagging, where the "victim" willingly opens their mouth?

  19. Arachnoid
    Thumb Down

    Carpet Baggers

    Didn't this used to be disallowed to own a domain and not use it?

    Easy money for the domain name makers though.........lets make one called .xxx and see who we can blackmail money out of to prevent their name being used with it

    1. Crazy Operations Guy

      Re: Carpet Baggers

      xxx has been a TLD for quite some time now... Was created alongside such useful TLDs as .museum and .aero long before this cluster-fuck came into being. And, yes, its almost entirely defensive registrations rather than actual pornography.

      https://www.iana.org/domains/root/db/xxx.html

  20. Gis Bun

    Hmmmm

    Rich but almost flat chested. To bad her ex-boyfriends don't write songs about her.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hmmmm

      They would but the domain name has been registered by her legal team...

  21. magickmark
    Devil

    WFT

    Hummm..

    I wonder if ICANN have ever thought of a new TLD of ".swift" (dot swift) they could make a mint with that one!

  22. J Bourne

    Money for nothing....

    'The advance sale will likely be viewed as a pre-emptive opportunity for brands to stop trolls claiming their trademarked names'

    I thought all this had been dealt with without the need for trademark owners having to 'buy'/rent/lease their own trademark back, effectively bringing an end to domain squatting.

    As others have already observed, there's more controversial or pr0n domain names to be made up however many you (Taylor Swift) can imagine and pre-register (pay for).

    Do you think if I registered Itaughttaylorswifthowtogivehead.co.uk I'd make a profit? (that ones easy and for free, I could think of loads more...)

  23. CamberwellCarrot

    Have you seen her guitar skills? I would be disavowing that she was ever my student.

  24. Anonymous C0ward

    All her songs are about exes. She ought to wonder where the common factor lies in those relationships.

  25. Tony Haines

    Available:

    taylor-swift.photos

    taylor-swift.rocks

    taylor-swift.social

    itaughttaylorswifthowtomake.love

    itaughttaylorswifthowtobuydomainnames.com

    ...

    Get on it, techno-lawyers.

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