back to article NSFW: Click here, watch iPhone 6 being TORTURED

Apple claims its latest device is bigger and better than any other mobile phone, but the iOS 8 sporting iPhone 6 Plus has already been criticised for supposedly bending in fanbois' pockets. So if it can't survive the flaming heat of an Apple lover's crotch, what hope has it got against a hammer or a large calibre rifle? Not a …

  1. EssEll
    Mushroom

    Ouch

    "Out of all the devices I have tortured tested, this one has definitely held up the best," the Tech Assassin rules after his torture tests are finished."

    What the hell happened to the rest of them??

    1. DragonLord

      Re: Ouch

      Well it could mean that they fared worse, or it could mean he's only ever torture tested one thing...

      1. Lazlo Woodbine

        Re: Ouch

        The stuff Richard Ryan torture tests generally dies, usually cut in half by .50 calibre rounds, but sometimes packed with C4 or wrapped in detonation cord.

        It really does make Top Gear seem sensible, but it's always fun to watch

      2. NoneSuch Silver badge

        Re: Ouch

        Should be NSFF

        Not Suitable For Fanbois.

  2. Admiral Grace Hopper
    Unhappy

    Gutted

    Blendtec suckered me.

    1. Paul 135

      Re: Gutted

      but was it a Blendtec blender?

  3. Jedit Silver badge
    Boffin

    I do not think these tests are realistic or accurate

    How can they be accurate, when they're not conducted on a device in normal operating conditions? The tests should be repeated with the iPhones in their owners' pockets or hands.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I do not think these tests are realistic or accurate

      "The tests should be repeated with the iPhones in their owners' pockets or hands."

      After a few minutes in an ordinary pocket the new iPhone will already be bent. The services of Tech Assassin seem rather superfluous.

  4. a well wisher

    He would do well to team up with ;The Gadget Show' in the UK they also perform equally mindless and irrelevant 'testing' on all sorts of kit

  5. NP-Hardass

    How could you forget?!?!

    Instead of that crummy blender....

    You needed "Will it bend?" Apparently, putting it in your front pocket is torture enough for the poor iPhone 6 Plus. The frame is too small at the volume buttons, causing the phone to bend and deform under pressure.

  6. JonP
    Coat

    Is it just me...

    ... or are the seemingly endless stream of videos of people destroying their iPhones getting just a little boring now? "Let's expose an iPhone to temperatures of 2.5k C and see what happens!!!1", well, yeah it melted. Don't get me wrong, the blending thing was kinda fun the first few times but now...

    it is just me isn't it?

    1. DrXym

      Re: Is it just me...

      The main thing you have to appreciate is they do these "tests" as click bait. Presumably enough people click to make pay for the cost of the phone and then some.

    2. DJV Silver badge
      Flame

      Re: Is it just me...

      Agreed - they should torture test something else instead. How about Iain Duncan Smith?

      Flames - well, it's just appropriate!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Is it just me...

        Who voted this down?

        Haven't you noticed how, as the Scottish referendum approached, IDS disappeared completely from visual, radar and sonar?

        I suspect that Cameron would prefer it if IDS went off to become a melon farmer. I'm not for one microsecond advocating testing his resistance to .5 calibre bullets, but isn't it about time he went off to become a host on one of the clickover TV channels?

        1. Geoffrey W

          Re: Is it just me...

          RE: IDS

          He's a human lightning conductor and quite expendable. If whatever they ask him to present and promote proves a step too far then, hey ho, shovel him under the bus and let the media eat him.

    3. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge

      Re: Is it just me...

      When you have seen one phone in a blender you have pretty much seen them all dropped in a blender. The first time (so many years ago) it was an amusing novelty, proved what people thought would happen did happen at no cost to themselves, "neat", but now it's rather tedious.

      Like firework displays, you have to go bigger and better to keep people interested, but the destroyers seem to have run out of fresh ideas.

      Show me something which doesn't blend.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Is it just me...

        The blender doing the blending; it held up didn't it?

      2. Captain DaFt

        Re: Is it just me...

        "Show me something which doesn't blend."

        Here ya go: http://www.willitblend.com/videos/crowbar

        Note the clever way they dodged out of blending it.

    4. Matt Bryant Silver badge
      Meh

      Re: JonP Re: Is it just me...

      ".....are the seemingly endless stream of videos of people destroying their iPhones getting just a little boring now?...." Yes. I don't want an iBone6, plus or otherwise, but I don't see the point of this childish and destructive showing off. It's almost as bad as the fanbois and their showing off. A much better vid would be someone saying "I have the cash for six iPhones but I'm going to donate it to charity, so suck on that Tim Cook!"

    5. Adam 1

      Re: Is it just me...

      I'm waiting for the series "but will it toddler", where various things are put in the hands of a two year old to see how resilient they really are.

    6. chivo243 Silver badge
      Unhappy

      Re: Is it just me...

      I'm astonished really, the sheer wastefulness of this boggles my mind. Cash, resources, and people's time. It adds up to a big waste.

      Innocent tales of accidental near destruction were funny.

  7. Colin Miller

    stick-out lens?

    The Beeb says the the jPhone rocks when placed on a table, and attributes that to it bending. However, the article doesn't mention that the lens sticks out 1mm, which will cause it to rock.

  8. zen1

    more money than common sense

    I don't share the same level of enthusiasm over the new iPhone as the rest of the world... In fact, I could care less as to me, its just a phone. But what I don't understand is why the need to destroy several of them? Yes, it's his money, he can do what he wants with it and his own property, but that just seems to be such a waste.

    1. Billa Bong

      common sense for making more money

      There is "common sense" here - "what can I do to this phone to have people watch it and give me a load of ad revenue, more than enough to buy another one for keeps". At the end of the day, it's all about the money.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I hope he took AppleCare

    Otherwise I don't think you will get warranty after these simple tests.

    1. Irony Deficient

      Re: I hope he took AppleCare

      Martijn Otto, if he did have AppleCare on one of the departed devices, and they made a video of going to the local Apple store to make a claim on the remains while acting as if it were his first ever mobile phone — that would be funny. “It was running slowly, so I pressed that big button a couple of times, and all of a sudden, BOOM!”

  10. emmanuel goldstein

    FANBOIS' SHINY NEW TOYS GET BENT

    apparently the iPhone 6 plus has an undocumented feature - a flexible screen (and a flexible body). quality.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/apple/iphone/11117809/The-iPhone-6-Plus-bends-but-not-by-design.html

  11. fanboi #451
    Childcatcher

    Very sad state ..

    ...when people have so much cash to waste that they spend it on destroying $600+ of technology just so that they can get noticed. If I had $600 to burn like that it would go to charity, not on idiotic pranks.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    We should perform these tests on all those cisco routers that fail to provide enough memory for DNS tables...

  13. Anonymaus Cowark

    what was the NSFW bit?

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fandroids must be conflicted

    On the one hand they must enjoy watching iPhones destroyed in some entertaining ways.

    On the other hand, by watching and providing the guys doing these videos enough clicks/views to pay for the phones they're destroying, they're helping to contribute a few more dollars to Apple's bottom line.

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