back to article US Reapers get satnav bombs, deploy on Canadian border

The General Atomics Predator-B drone aircraft - better known under its US Air Force name, the "Reaper" - has just dropped its first satnav-guided weapons. In a doubtless unrelated development, the roboplane also seems set to deploy along the US-Canadian border. The Reaper packing its new satnav smartbombs Mowing down humans …

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  1. Steve

    Translation

    "The Arctic is a new area that is important to us," said the general, saying that retreating polar ice could mean increased activity in the far north. "All of this has implications .. there could be security concerns."

    Those commie bastards may have a flag down there, but I'll be damned if that's going to get between me and my oil! Iraq had a flag - look how they turned out.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Watch Out...!

    "The Arctic is a new area that is important to us"

    Oil?

    " .. there could be security concerns."

    Especially for the residents of Canukistan.

  3. Mike Crawshaw
    Joke

    Revenge for 1814?

    Never let it be said the 'merkins forget a grudge...

  4. David Harper

    Do bears shit in the woods?

    Yes, if they're Canadian bears and they hear a Predator drone coming.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Uh-Oh

    Oh dear gawd we burned their capital down. I live in our capital. Oh dear gawd.

  6. Richard Thomas

    Sat Nav

    How long before one of these ignores the warning signs and gets stuck between two igloos in an Inuit village?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Democracy comes to Canada

    About time those weapons of mass destruction were cleaned out of Canada and democracy introduced...

  8. StopthePropaganda
    Flame

    um, it's not about Kanuckistan

    it's about protecting Alaska. Since the enviro nuts are keeping us from drilling ANWR, it is one of the largest untapped fields known in the world. When everywhere else runs dry, Alaska becomes the most valuable real estate in the world. And I guarantee you that none of the so called "peaceful" nations will sit around if that land is unguarded with overwhelming deadly force.

    Is that the real goal of the Enviro-Mentalists? To raise the value of (err.."preserve" ) Alaskan land for the day when increased cyclic climate temps and oil supply reductions makes AK comfortable to live in AND the future equivalent of the oil fields in the Middle East?

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    The time has come

    "Mr. President, we've identified a key shortage of backbacon within our economy. Without this resource we will have to resort to using plain old ham on our Hawaiian-style pizzas. You owe it to the American people to secure a reliable supply of Canadian bacon!"

    Either that or GWB stayed up late a couple months ago watching the South Park movie on DVD, and he has decided to pre-empt those shifty Canucks before they can bomb Jessica and Ashlee Simpson.

  10. Hollerith

    funny how it is...

    ...that the Americans never wanted the Arctic and indeed signed an international treaty circa 1880 to agree that the UK had given all its lands in the arctic to the new country of Canada. Canadians could have it when it was just snow and seals, but as soon as oil was found in the north, all of a sudden the Arctic areas in Canadian ownership were 'disputed' by the USA. It has practised the 'act as if your version of reality was real' by sailing through Canadian territory waters without permission or notification for decades. Even Russia, then and now, was not so arrogant. Now, of course, foreign ownership of areas America wants to own becomes a 'security risk'. Lots of Canadians don't hate the USA, but I am not one of them.

  11. g e

    Eddie Izzard knows how reaping can be avoided

    Doubtless little old ladies and females in general will be immune to reaping due to their knowledge of hopscotch

    Does that make Mr Izzard Esq some kind of WMD???

    I hope he has a schpeedboat for a quick getaway :oD

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Revenge

    G. Lightfoot and J. Mitchell have exacted sufficient revenge! In any case, we had torched York (Toronto, that is).

    Note also that the USA has its own Arctic holdings--closer to Canada than to Minot, North Dakota, admittedly.

  13. Glenn Amspaugh
    Stop

    Skynet clamps down on US?

    I thought this was to keep 'Merkins from escaping Freedom Paradisio, where all the wimmin' are busty and the children are above average? Same with the fence down south ways.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    revenge for celine dion maybe....

    nahh

    they are after those pesky canadian drugs barons who have thier secret drugs manufacturing bunkers in the woods over the border.

    the fact that its the americans who are buying it all is besides the point.... or not, maybe they dont want those worthless american dollars flowing northwoods ;p

    or is it cos those pesky canadians wont buckle to the demands of the RIAA mafia, so the next step is to bomb those evil p2pr's into submission..

    either way, looks like GWB has found his next war zone he can open up before the next election, so he can put it off indefinatly.....

    end of the world is nigh...

  15. FathomsDown
    Coat

    Because....

    Its to defend against this, obviously:

    http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/funny-pictures-moose-jet-planes.jpg

    ... mine is the one with the antlers and the red dot on it.

  16. ratfox
    Joke

    Northern Canada is huge

    But currently covered with ice.

    ...I believe Canadians are secretly polluting as much as they can, hoping for global warming.

  17. heystoopid
    Coat

    Say

    Say , have you heard about the story of what a Canuckstan Navy old obsolete Oberon submarine HMCS Ojibwa did in 1997 to an outbound patrol Trident Boomer as it cut across a notorious area in Puget Sound where fishermen regularly have to cut nets snagged by slow large underwater moving objects !

    The Boomer in question took off like a scalded rat making enough racket to wake the dead moving at high speed to cover the final three nautical miles to the line at the highest possible flank speed , The Captain of the offending submarine realised he had been sprung big time by another older but much quieter obsolete submarine following in his stern baffles from the moment he crossed the line to cut the the corner as it is known as and hearing the Canuckstan crew laughter ring in his ears prior to his sudden egress !

  18. E

    Secret Weapon

    We will just carpet bomb the USA with BC bud. n/p.

  19. E

    @Revenge

    I can see the entire world not just the Yanks wanting revenge for Celine Dion. Heck I sometimes want revenge for Dion and I live here!

    Joni Mitchel and Gordon Lightfoot however are geniuses.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    O Canada

    Fear not, plucky young beavers!

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    GWB the 3rd

    "We will just carpet bomb the USA with BC bud"

    No no 'cause then even *more* people will be too stoned to vote, and GWB-clones will reign forever.

  22. scott
    Unhappy

    Canadian Bacon

    John Candy the prophet.

    Canadain Bacon is the last full movie he did. Very well worth finding and watching on a US election and the president needing to find somebody to attack to boost his ratings. Canada seems like the obvious target.

    The parka with the mittens on a string, and toque in the pocket.

    To our "friendly" neighbours to the south, take of eh, you hosers.

  23. Tim99 Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    Be Afraid?

    I believe that Canada is the largest exporter of oil to the USA. WMDs and Regime Change next?

  24. Robert Moore

    @scott

    Best movie ever made. :) OK, not really, but it does have a great scene with Michael Moore (Yes, that Michael Moore) jumping up and down shouting, with a large rifle in his hand. :)

    Makes me smile every time I watch it.

  25. Wil
    Linux

    Yes, revenge...

    ...for Terrence & Philip.

    They have to sink as many seals as possible. Seal flatulence is the primary cause behind global warming.

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    grease

    Or theres oil in the north...

    I'd love to spead oil on Paris.

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