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Ireland's Health Products Regulatory Authority (HPRA) has advised any woman who's trying to get pregnant to check her Clungene, if indeed she's using the Chinese pregnancy test kit to confirm she's up the duff. In some cases, the product has been providing false positives, so just when you think your Clungene is telling you …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    OMG

    Well, you learn something new every day they say.

    I always thought clunge was a word used to describe the everyday discharge from the female vagina that, when not cleaned regularly, turns into some kind of orange crust.

    1 1 Reply
    1. Michael Thibault
      Reply Icon
      Boffin

      Re: OMG

      >I always thought clunge was a word used to describe the everyday discharge from the female vagina that, when not cleaned regularly, turns into some kind of orange crust.

      There's another kind of vagina?!

      8 0 Reply
      1. TRT Silver badge
        Reply Icon

        Re: OMG

        "There's another kind of vagina?!"

        The kind that allegedly visits a palace in Westminster in order to represent the will of the people.

        14 0 Reply
    2. Fungus Bob
      Reply Icon

      Re: OMG

      "discharge from the female vagina that, when not cleaned regularly, turns into some kind of orange crust."

      HEY! Some of us are eating....

      0 0 Reply
  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A big hand to Jay from The Inbetweeners for introducing so many new people to the joys of that word!

    4 0 Reply
    1. AbortRetryFail
      Reply Icon

      'Clunge' pre-dates the Inbetweeners by decades, although perhaps you're right in saying that it brought it to the attention of a new generation.

      3 0 Reply
      1. TheProf
        Reply Icon

        I thought it came from the BBC TV programme "The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin" (1970's). I remember it being used by a Scottish gardener as in 'Up yer clunge!'

        I also expect to be corrected for getting this whole memory wrong.

        4 0 Reply
        1. CatoTheCat
          Reply Icon

          You are quite right: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2p-SVuUaYs

          0 0 Reply
          1. TRT Silver badge
            Reply Icon

            The BBC did often make up rude sounding words for sitcoms so as to be as realistic as the situation part of the show without offending, e.g Porridge's "Naff 'Orf", "Nerk" and "Scrote". Channel 4 did the same with "Feck", though I believe that was already used in parts of Eire.

            Or an even earlier example from the USA....

            6 0 Reply
            1. joeW
              Reply Icon

              Channel 4 did not fecking invent feck. It's massively common in Ireland, and have three guesses where the guy who wrote and created Father Ted is from...?

              0 0 Reply
  3. The last doughnut
    Happy

    Wha?

    It does sound rather like a sanitising product. I could be very rude about Irish ladies but I won't go there.

    0 1 Reply
  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Thank you all for clearing up the history of clunge

    In our household we've discussed the origin of the word 'clunge' since first hearing it (used beautifully) on The Inbetweeners. I thought the writers had come up with it as an even funnier schoolboy alternative to minge.

    0 0 Reply
    1. TRT Silver badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: Thank you all for clearing up the history of clunge

      There's also a Scottish word, I believe, "clundy" (with a hardish 'd' almost a 't' sound) meaning a dark, disreputable place, a hole, alley-way or drain opening. As used in the song "Wor Geordie". It's not a great phonetic leap from clundy to clunge.

      1 0 Reply
  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    just when other commentators were saying

    That "Chinese copy" is no longer a phrase to be used to disparage far eastern products now that they have the skills to rival or surpass other nations.

    or do we blame the Irish Medicines Board, or some poor importer (whose Responsible Person has probably broken out into the coldest of cold sweats)

    0 0 Reply
  6. Crazy Operations Guy

    Better false positives than false negatives...

    I'd think that a false positive would be the far better alternative since the preparations for pregnancy aren't harmful (Vitamins, cutting certain out certain foods, etc) whereas being pregnant but not knowing can cause all sorts of problems.

    Of course anyone that suspects that they might be regnant should see their doctor and get a much better test done.

    1 2 Reply
    1. Anonymous Coward
      Reply Icon
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Better false positives than false negatives...

      > I'd think that a false positive would be the far better alternative

      Except that this is Ireland, and abortions are still illegal. So for those who do not wish to have a baby at that point in their lives, a false positiive at best results in an expensive trip abroad to get a legal abortion, at worst it may result in some poor unfortunate going through an extremely risky back street procedure for no reason. And they may well never visit a doctor to get a proper test, in order that there is no one to ask awkward questions when the expected baby doesn't appear.

      2 1 Reply
      1. Anonymous Coward
        Reply Icon
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Better false positives than false negatives...

        Or they could just have the child, accept their life has changed and deal with it*.

        * Speaking not as a foaming-at-the-mouth fundamentalist but as someone who was adopted at birth in the 60s, and may not have been here if abortion was as freely available then as it is today. The inconvenience seems to trump the life too easily.

        0 4 Reply
      2. Ross K Silver badge
        Reply Icon
        WTF?

        Re: Better false positives than false negatives...

        it may result in some poor unfortunate going through an extremely risky back street procedure for no reason.

        Please elaborate on your theory regarding back street procedures.

        0 1 Reply
  7. skeptical i
    Pint

    "13 Astonishing True Facts You Never Knew About SCREWS" article link to the right.

    Well placed, that.

    0 0 Reply
  8. hi_robb

    err

    yes Irish woman, use another product on your clungene 'to be sure'

    I'm actually a bit stunned that the Chinese do a cheap pregnancy test, they really do take the piss..

    /gets coat

    2 0 Reply

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