back to article Kim Kardashian's bosom pal in bling snatch Instagram unpleasantness

Kim Kardashian's best buddy was roughed up by a wannabe mugger soon after Instagramming his $500,000 gold watch in a flash cafe, according to a New York gossip column. Jonathan Cheban, who frequently appears on the execrable reality show Keeping Up with the Kardashians, was busy chowing down on an alfresco lobster lunch at the …

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  1. thesykes
    Facepalm

    Just goes to show... money can't buy you taste... that is one hideous looking watch.

    1. Graham Marsden
      Facepalm

      Re: "money can't buy you taste..."

      ... it can't buy you sense either!

    2. JLV
      Thumb Up

      can't buy you brains either.

      Though methink the watch does fit the Kardashian look perfectly.

      One thing that stuck in my mind re. Kim, besides all the tabloid crap during supermarket checkouts.

      Some years back, Consumer Reports found, in reviewing celebrity branded credit cards, Kim's version was the worst in how much it gouged its users financially.

      Nice gal, to screw her adoring fans, nope?

      1. Don Jefe
        Happy

        Re: can't buy you brains either.

        That's because the licensing for quasi-branded cards goes through three or four intermediaries, who each add a %. It's not especially cheap to do, but you too can have JLV branded credit card and sign up all your enemies.

        Say, I know a guy, who knows a guy. I can set you up with him for .08% of future transactions...

        1. JLV

          Re: can't buy you brains either.

          Skimming certainly happens, but those financial arrangements exist with other celebrities as well.

          Odd that the skimming was the heaviest in Keeping Up With The Kardashians-land, no? Could it possibly be because her cut was bigger than the other celebs'?

          YMMV, but I choose blame it more directly on the gold-digging b**ch, not on unknown circumstances. May be unwarranted, but it could hardly happen to a nicer person ;-)

          And, sorry, Business Insider, not Consumer Report:

          http://gawker.com/5693964/kim-kardashians-credit-card-may-be-the-worst-credit-card-ever

  2. CAPS LOCK

    Proof, if proof were needed, that having a lot of money doesn't mean you're not a chav.

    Couldn't have happened to a more appropriate person.

  3. Anomalous Cowshed

    Phwoarrr!

    It's stories like these that make scum like me content with our lot and entirely satisfied that we are not mingling with these high-fliers - are they planted on purpose? I wonder.

    The watch however, looks amazing - not to wear, but just to look at.

    Earlier this year I saw a watch selling for £240,000 at Selfridges. Obviously that's for a lower income crowd.

    1. Pascal Monett Silver badge

      High-flyer ? Hardly.

      Do not confuse genuine VIPs with turds that happen to be temporarily hovering above ground.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    To quote one of my favourite authors ...

    "Think of it as evolution in action."

    1. ItsNotMe
      Happy

      Re: To quote one of my favourite authors ...

      Nothing like Darwinism.

  5. stephajn

    That's what you get....

    ....for being one of these people that feels like you have to be a voyeurist about the everyday mundane things in life and show them off.

    1. MrT

      Probably took the photo...

      ... with a $5m solid gold iPad. Loudly.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who's Kim Kardashian?

    1. theblackhand

      Re: Who's Kim Kardashian?

      Rather than asking this question, just be content in the knowledge (ignorance?) that not knowing makes you a better person in so many ways....

      You'll have to trust me that this isn't an insult as you will never re-coup the brain cells lost if you Google her or the time spent asking the question "why?".

      1. Jamie Jones Silver badge
        Thumb Up

        Re: Who's Kim Kardashian?

        The Cardacians are an alien race on the star-trek shows

        I presume Kim is one of their diplomats.

        1. Don Jefe

          Re: Who's Kim Kardashian?

          Here is the place for all you may want to know about the Kardashian's.

        2. TheVogon
          Mushroom

          Re: Who's Kim Kardashian?

          Well she certainly has no shame. Reminds me of that Episode of Harry Enfield - when Waynetta Slob says "I want a black baby like all the other mothers on the estate".....

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Who's Kim Kardashian?

            Vogon

            It was a brown baby...not black.

            Great sketch.

    2. Vociferous

      A woman with a gorgeous body and face, but apparently not much else.

      1. Ruisert

        And a rich lawyer dad who reps the stars in Hollyweird. (He was one of OJ's "Dream Team" that allowed him to literally get away with murder. ) And this is the only reason she has a TV show. Not, of course, that anything like talent is required for a "reality" TV show. Much like another ill-gotten spawn of the rich, Paris Hilton, Quim is famous merely for being famous. It's people like her, and her, and the doofus about whom the article was written, that make me desperately wish one hugeass asteroid would hit Earth and wipe out 99.9% of the human race, Hard to believe after 4 billion years of evolution that this is the best that can be had...

  7. Mike Flugennock
    Happy

    Wow, too bad...

    ...that guy didn't get away with the watch.

    Not that there aren't more important things to get pissed off about, but it really bugs the shit out of me when I see these filthy-rich-assed hot shots posting fotos on Instagram and Twitter of their new watches'n'bling, and fotos of their restaurant checks.

    It really is a shame that guy didn't get away with that asshole's watch.

    1. Suburban Inmate
      Facepalm

      Re: Wow, too bad...

      Yeah, the miscreant could have gone to cash4gold.

      They'd have given him half a cup of oats and a bent shilling if he haggled well.

      1. Vociferous

        Re: Wow, too bad...

        ...and we've all had to pay to the posh knob who lost it through our insurance premiums.

    2. Charlie Clark Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Wow, too bad...

      Reminds me of the spate, or at least reported spate of muggings of I-Pods when the white headphones came out.

      I'd have held his coat…

    3. Daniel B.
      Facepalm

      Re: Wow, too bad...

      ...that guy didn't get away with the watch.

      So I wasn't the only one thinking that! $500k would clear my debt, pay off my apartment and probably give me a 2 year long vacation period. There's no way in hell I'd buy something as expensive as that; but even more, if I did have one I wouldn't Instagram it! That's just asking to get mugged!

      1. Ruisert

        Re: Wow, too bad...

        Hell, half a mill would see me to my grave and still some to pass on. Seriously, how much money does someone really need? Eat the rich.

  8. GBE

    Southhampton is not in "the city"

    The restaurant was in Southhamption, which is a town about 60 miles east of New York City. It may be posh, but it's not a disctrict in the city. It's not even close to the city.

    1. ItsNotMe

      Re: Southhampton is not in "the city"

      Right you are my good man. More like 90 miles (145km), but still, not even close.

      And hey Jasper...Google Maps can be your friend. No really.

      1. MrT

        Doesn't the Instagram app...

        ...include geotag information on photos? Just wondering if the perp got the location of the flash-trash-tastic from that - unless the associated message included the full where, when, why, who and whatever brag as well...

  9. Byz
    Happy

    I'd rather have...

    Good health, happiness, true friends and a loving family, but most of all be happy being me :)

    Than all the riches in the world.

    (Having had bad health in the past it is wonderful to have good health again)

    I've met so many wealthy people or people working all the hours God gave them to be wealthy, who are really miserable as the only thing they have is money. Eventually it becomes so consuming they can't enjoy it as they have to get more.

    However as my wife says "Money doesn't make you happy but it makes misery bearable"

    ;)

    1. Anonymous IV

      Re: I'd rather have...

      > "Money doesn't make you happy but it makes misery bearable"

      Surely the quotation was "Money doesn't make you happy but it makes poverty bearable"?

  10. Ketlan
    Thumb Down

    Ohmigod...

    I have no idea who the Kardashians are but I hate them already. Even more, I loathe and detest anyone who will waste such an exhorbitant sum as half a million dollars on anything, let alone a particularly hideous watch. The world is truly fucked.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Megaphone

      Re: Ohmigod...

      But on the other hand, the money goes to the watchmaker, who will use it to buy the bonds of a company in dire need of cash so that it may extend its capital structure tool up in order to produce more of goodie X. This however, means that worker Y and Z need to be hired, which means that their income can be used to feed wife and children.

      So by buying this watch MAY HELP THE ECONOMY!

      And the original money came from couch potatoes. CAPITALISM ROCKS!

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    As my father would say, "More money than brains."

    1. Paul Crawford Silver badge

      I think that would still be true with a plastic watch from the Poundshop...

    2. Cris E
      Thumb Up

      > "More money than brains."

      Or "More dollars than sense."

  12. disgruntled yank

    Geography

    "in the city's posh Hamptons district"

    The Hamptons are at the eastern end of Long Island, quite a trek from New York City, say 90 miles or 150 kilometers.

    The more interesting question may be how one could dispose of a stolen watch of that sort. I doubt that the fences would want something that notorious, or care to pay anything like the nominal cost if it didn't make such noise.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Gimp

      Re: Geography

      You could probably find a mad scientist eager to use this watch in some gruesome, unethical experiment on live humans.

    2. Don Jefe

      Re: Geography

      The stolen timepiece industry is thriving in the Middle East and China. The Hamptons version of a street criminal probably knows exactly where to get of of something like this.

  13. Carl W

    Jacob & Co

    Purveyors of the world's tackiest watches. Could get a decent Patek Phillipe, Jaeger le Coutre, etc. for the prices that J&Co charge.

    1. Don Jefe
      Happy

      Re: Jacob & Co

      A Patek Phillipe is a mechanical marvel and a testament to human ingenuity, engineering and the study of the natural world. Jacob & Co watches are not fine timepieces, they are jewelry, no different than having a solid gold diamond encrusted hood ornament on your car, which is effectively what they are.

  14. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Coat

    If that watch falls down the loo, it will be watcherloo!

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Serves them right. Privileged people with money to waste on flashy crap that says to the rest of the world "Look at me, I have so much money". Then they wonder why muggers reply with "Yes I know, hand it over".

    Modern day highwayman-ship.

  16. Mitoo Bobsworth
    Facepalm

    Twunt

    If you're stupid enough to instagram your expensive stuff for all to view, expect shit to happen. No sympathy here.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Typical clan

    None of the clan nor their associates are brighter than a half-watt light bulb.

  18. M Gale

    Seem to be a lot of envious people here.

    Bad taste is not a crime fer fuxache (unless you say the wrong things in the UK of course), and it's still some nasty scrote of a thief trying to nick someone else's stuff. Personally I'm disappointed said thief didn't end up with a few broken extremities in the ensuing struggle. It might have taught him a lesson or two.

    Or perhaps not, but it's harder to mug someone when you don't have the use of your fingers. Or legs.

    Would any of you act differently, if that was your portable tech toy about to get robbed? I'd wager there's a few here who'd probably like to push the thief's teeth out through his arsehole if it happened to them.

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Eradicate all BB entrants

      Envy doesn't come into it.....

      ..... but incredulity about the watch owners stupidity does. Compared to properly engineered watches the thing is just a cheap ebay watch coated in expensive materials. It was not purchased as a magnificent piece of engineering, it was purchased to show how much more money he has than you. It was bought to gloat with. Paying that much for a Ferrari Enzo is understandable as it probably had more engineering expertise spent on the wheel nuts than in that entire watch.

    3. codejunky Silver badge

      @ M Gale

      It would appear that you (and I) have the minority opinion so far. Apparently it is ok to steal from someone showing off an over expensive item while being (or friends with) show-offs. I guess its ok to steal as long as you dont like the people you steal from. Maybe the poor should en-mass break into middle class homes because those show-offs have a nice house and cars etc.

      Its a sorry world we live in M Gale. I cant believe you got down voted nor can I balance it out. But you are not alone. I too think it is wrong to steal.

      1. Paul Crawford Silver badge

        I expect most readers think it is wrong to steal, but equally they think it is mind-numbingly stupid to advertise / taunt the masses with something that is there principally to show off the fact that the wearer has more money to spend on a single item of decoration than the average person can earn in a decade.

        As for taste, well that of course is one's own matter. Personally I think the watch is tacky, as a fraction of the cost would buy a selection of watches that are either better examples of mechanical engineering and/or more accurate in time-keeping (possibly both). If you ask readers of a technical news site for an opinion, don't be surprised if they don't share some of this view point.

        1. Mike Simmons
          Childcatcher

          There is one question I have for you Paul, do you think the Flashy Idiot has enough intelligence to even be able to read the time. I think he would be better suited if he had a few Mickey Mouse characters printed on the face of this monstrosity of a so-called watch.

        2. codejunky Silver badge

          @paul

          Some people buy over expensive and flashy items to treat themselves. Most people I know will splurge on a single flashy item. For some people its a car. Even personalised number plates is a flashy and not cheap item and it is definitely for showing off to the world. Look at people with the latest I-gizmo or samsung item. How many woman wearing flashy jewellery?

          The point is that not everyone can afford it, and its not to everyones taste. But it is still wrong for someone to try to steal it. Especially under the flimsy excuse that they were asking for it or could afford it.

    4. cordwainer 1
      Happy

      A rich guy with class . . .

      Would have helped the mugger remove the watch and said, "No need to cause a scene, my good man. Here, take it. And good riddance, hideous thing. What WAS I thinking?"

      I can't answer for others here, but I'm betting the majority have more sense than to play tug-of-war with a mugger who might have a knife or a gun or be a total psychopath. Me? I say, it's just a thing, no matter how expensive. Let them have it. It's not worth risking my life, the one item I can't replace. Not to mention pesky laws noting self defsnse only comes into play when one's actual self is threatened with injury or death.

      And speaking of death, $500,000 would go a long way toward preventing quite a lot of suffering and it....and that's where you might want to look up "envious" in the dictionary, because I'm not sure you know what it means.

      "A lot" of people here are genuinely depressed and/or appalled at how many wealthy individuals like Cheban seem to think simply having and spending large sums of money is something to brag about. Whereas in reality, inheriting millions then blowing a great wad of it on a shiny thing to wave around is not an achievement.

      I don't know exactly what it IS. Except what's clear from history is that inability to grasp the real-world value of that kind of money, and the lack of perspective such a purchase reveals, are all too often indicators of underlying pathology, at the very least some kind of mild mental illness or psychological impairment. It's unhealthy, and robs them of the ability to recognize when their behavior might lead to serious harm, whether to themselves or others.

      Oh, you're right when you say it's not a crime. Not legally. But you have to remember: the mindset behind such an action - the decision to waste an enormous investment that could accomplish something of genuine value, even if only in that individual's own life - is the equivalent of a crime in most belief systems and many social systems. Religion I suppose would call it "sin" instead, though whether "greed" or "vanity" I leave for others to debate.

      If you object to the mention of sin, I must reply (somewhat childishly), "you started it" by accusing other commenters of the mortal sin of envy. Nonsense. The majority of comments criticizing Mr. Cheban merely point out (albeit with a good deal of disbelief and contempt) that spending the sum in question on an item such as the one shown can in no way be considered an "accomplishment", at least not one a completely sane or mature person would take pride in.

      Any halfway rational adult would instead be embarrassed to admit he was so badly conned by a salesman, or a bit of clever marketing, and that he let himself be ripped off so royally. A fully rational adult would seek help.

      1. M Gale

        Re: A rich guy with class . . .

        Not to mention pesky laws noting self defsnse only comes into play when one's actual self is threatened with injury or death.

        If someone is prepared to rip that watch from your wrist, or try to take that iThing out of your hand, how do you know they are not prepared to kick the shit out of you just for the lulz anyway?

        And how do you know if they'll stop when you're down?

        Any initiation of violence is a quite valid excuse to defend yourself, as dangerously as you can muster. You simply don't know how far the other person will go.

        As for the objections to my post being from people pointing out that the watch was overpriced and tacky.. no. Read up. Read such things as "that's what you get" and "evolution in action". I'm no religionist, so I don't think there is such a thing as "sin" in a religious context. However, to say that people here are not envious that someone can afford half a million to blow on a blinged-up watch, is to have not read the entire comments section.

        Have to say I'm a little envious myself, but I detest muggers with a vengeance that burns far brighter than any dislike I may or may not have for particular show-offs.

  19. JustWondering
    Happy

    Really?

    This is the first good reason I have heard for participating in Instagram. I would have brought a machete along.

  20. Vociferous

    Trickle down economy FTW!

    Isn't it great to see Job Creators(tm) hard at work, trickling on the poor from a lofty position?

  21. kyza

    I'm deeply distressed - I only got as far as 'Kim Kardashian's bosom' and find out the article, far from displaying or being about KKs mounds of heavenly glory, is actually about some twat being a twat and getting twatted for it.

    Boo!

  22. MachDiamond Silver badge

    Tips for the beautiful people

    Do not post pictures of your fancy watches/jewelry/solid gold iPad on social media with a note on what you overpaid for it.

    Do not post that you are on vacation for the next 2 weeks in a far away country if you don't have security guards on duty at your house.

    Think before you post any personal information.

    Don't post.

    The mugger was a rank amateur. Most experienced robbers would have given him a black jack to the head and had the watch in 5 seconds if they thought that they could resell it for enough. I doubt that many would be willing to take the risk. The watch is too obvious and too overpriced to have much resale value.

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