back to article REVEALED: Google's GINORMOUS £650m London Choc Factory

What would you do if you had a golden ticket that helped you avoid having to cough a big wodge of tax cash? Well, if you were Google, you'd build a hulking great glass monstrosity as wide as The Shard is tall, smack bang in the middle of London. The advertising giant has filed plans for a new £650m, 330m-long UK Chocolate …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. This post has been deleted by its author

  2. ArmyCrow
    Facepalm

    Oh well...

    ... At least they'll have to pay building rates now.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Oh well...

      They may well not end up paying - Camden council refuses to say if the Scientology premises on Tottenham Court Road pays any or no tax on the building. This is despite FOI requests for this information...

    2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: Oh well...

      Although it may appear to be in Camden, for tax purposes the building is actually in another dimension.

      Also due to Google's advanced inter-dimensional engineering, the interior of the building is actually smaller than the outside - so they will only be liable for tax on the 1sq ft inside space

  3. Boris the Cockroach Silver badge
    Devil

    But the staff

    wont be doing any selling.....

    1. Flywheel

      Re: But the staff

      Maybe it's in response to all those NSA and GCHQ requests

  4. Colin Millar

    Industrial heritage?

    Are they sure they mean King's Cross?

    Couple of stations and a gasholder is about it for "industry"

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Industrial heritage?

      When did you last go to King's Cross?

      The UK's only International Railway station and the East Coast mainline terminus are hardly just "a couple of stations" not to mention the proximity to Euston, Paddington and the excellent underground links to the rest of the capital. It seems like a pretty sensible place to put a company and many people are.

      Not that I don't want Google to FRO, but that's another matter.

      1. nosport

        Re: Industrial heritage?

        I second that. After their recent architectural 'upgrades' they're the best two buildings associated with travel in the country (thank you English Heritage). I recommend The Parcel Yard pub upstairs in King's Cross.

        And it'll be TWO international stations soon - after the Scottish referendum that is.

    2. Anomalous Cowshed

      Re: Industrial heritage?

      You complain? That's already not bad at all! The way things are going, we will soon have a massive dump full of rusty filing cabinets formerly used by a firm operating in the marketing industry in the 1980s being labelled as "industrial heritage".

    3. Shagbag

      Re: Industrial heritage?

      All that money and it looks like a shoe box on stilts.

      1. Don Jefe
        Happy

        Re: Industrial heritage?

        The current design trends for high tech buildings have all been patented by Apple so they didn't have a lot of choice.

  5. Gordon 10
    Joke

    Missed an opportunity

    They should have taken inspriration from its local heritage and built the new HQ as a train like that nuclear train in Octopussy. That was they can send it up north to take advantage of post devolution reduced tax rates every time a big deal is due......

    1. RichardPH

      Re: Missed an opportunity

      My thoughts exactly. Some 10 metre high teak veneered copies of Gresley carriages. With the servers in the guards van.

      1. MJI Silver badge

        Re: Missed an opportunity

        What would power the emergency generators?

        A Valenta?

        A VP185?

        Any D18-25 would soon be rescued by the DPS.

    2. MJI Silver badge

      Re: Missed an opportunity

      Yes that was at Peterborough.

  6. Ed 13

    Mind where you put that drill

    Given the number of train tunnels in the area, I hope the builders are more careful than the ones building near Old Street:

    http://www.raib.gov.uk/publications/current_investigations_register/130308_old_street_station.cfm

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    But they have no staff...

    Exactly why does Google need 1,000,000 sq feet of office space, when it's entire UK staff seems to be (if their reports to the HMRC and parliament are to be be believed) a few definitely-not-salespeople, some office cleaners, and a work experience lad?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    ladies of the night

    As they don't pay tax either, maybe they'll be working inside the Googlpox too.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's no Apple spaceship that's for sure.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It looks like a 60s council office.

    It looks sodding awful IMO

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: It looks like a 60s council office.

      Indeed. The best thing we could have done to the brutalist architects was shoot them and burn their buildings and their plans to the ground. Instead they seem to be running riot again.

    2. the-it-slayer
      Unhappy

      Re: It looks like a 60s council office.

      Looks like the design has come from a cartoon! You're being generous by saying it's sodding awful. Kevin McCloud would be very upset if he saw this.

      1. Triggerfish

        Re: It looks like a 60s council office.

        I have to agree I thought that pic was of what they were going to knock down to make space for something nicer.

    3. Parax

      Re: It looks like a 60s council office.

      Agreed way to Brutal.

  11. TeeCee Gold badge
    WTF?

    "...taken inspiration from King’s Cross and St Pancras International railway stations..."

    I can't see any St Pancras influence in there.

    While they do seem to have captured the "concrete shithole" appearance of King's Cross, they seem to have omitted the rather fine brick and iron construction behind its facade.

    Also, an artist's impression is supposed to be of how the thing would look, not how it would look if you were to take a picture of it with a wide-angle lens. Unless of course it's supposed to look as if it were designed by Picasso while he was off his face on Absinthe.

    1. hayseed

      Re: "...taken inspiration from King’s Cross and St Pancras International railway stations..."

      "Cough" More Camden Yards than St. Pancras. Wanted to give a shout out to the British folks who burned my home town 200 years and one week ago.

  12. Paul 164
    FAIL

    Committed?

    Dan Cobley, Google UK’s managing director, said: “... We’re committed to the UK..."

    Yeah, committed to avoiding paying taxes here!

    I'll bet the Head Office of the building contractor they choose will be based in Ireland or some offshore tax haven too!

    1. and-job

      Re: Committed?

      Don't worry Dan, they're all for equality. They are equally committed to not paying taxes anywhere!

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    ...to 11 storeys...

    Shouldn't allow low-rise to be built in London, it wastes space.

    1. andy mcandy
      Holmes

      Re: ...to 11 storeys...

      London is mostly built on earlier bits of London, and clay. Unlike New York, where it is rock underneath. So build something too high/heavy and it will sink.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: ...to 11 storeys...

        Yes, you're quite right, it's impossible to build large buildings in London that is why it hasn't been done.

        1. Corinne

          Re: ...to 11 storeys...

          Depends very much on what part of London you're building on, how close to the river, underlying soil types etc.

          Rumour has it that one largish government building that went up in the 60's in the Westminster area had it's planned height drastically reduced at one end part way through construction, as the end nearer the river was showing signs of sinking. So this building ended up one end around 11-12 stories high, the other end 6.

          To build higher in London, with the clay subsoil especially, you have to dig much deeper foundations than for a lower building. This has impacts beyond the costs of digging the hole and building the foundations as anywhere in London that a new building goes up there has to be an archaeological survey done of the area - and the deeper you go the more chance that you'll come across something interesting from the past. This leads to everything being held up for months or even years while the archaeologists do their thing.

      2. smartypants

        Re: ...to 11 storeys...

        How tall is the Shard?

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Google build a box - Apple build a spaceship.

    1. Ben Holmes
      Windows

      Meanwhile...

      ...Microsoft concentrate on building a rod for their own back?

  15. David Black
    Windows

    FUGLY

    Just what Kings Cross needs.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    And of course...

    Those plans will not be finalized until AFTER the local politicos decide on their tax status.

    1. Don Jefe

      Re: And of course...

      That's the way stuff like this works. I guarantee they've got an 'alternative' design already drawn up. If the tax laws are changed they'll be forced to use the secondary design instead. It'll be a super high quality presentation of a shack built of old shipping pallets and surrounded by security staff that will illustrate the dystopian hell they'll be forced to live in if their favorable incentives are taken away.

  17. Jason 24
    Stop

    Well I wish...

    I had £650m to sink into a country that is making me no profit....

    1. JDX Gold badge

      Re: Well I wish...

      Spending £650m is WHY they will have no profit...

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    If they are clever...

    They won't actually own the building. It'll be built and paid for by an off-shore subsidiary and rented back to avoid all manner of taxes.

    1. and-job

      Re: If they are clever...

      Not only will be be rented by they will claim the cost of the rent as a loss on their taxes along with the cost of paying for all their staff as well. Google are consistent, they will find a way of paying no taxes at all anywhere but they continue to show huge profits to their shareholders but never make a decent profit anywhere and never seem to pay taxes on what profits they do declare.

      1. JDX Gold badge

        Re: If they are clever...

        Cost of rent and staff IS offset from taxable profit you dummy. It's the cornerstone of how company taxation works, the least controversial aspect of the whole thing.

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: If they are clever...

          Unless you are renting the building from yourself and billing the UK operations $1000/day for each of the staff who are actually employed by Google-Venus, their new off-planet tax haven.

          It was one of the few tax scams for small businesses. You were allowed to invest in real estate tax free as part of your pension. So you built a factory and rented it to your own company for well above market rates. The company paid less tax because it made less profit and all the extra money went into your real estate company which you got tax back on because it was a pension fund investment

  19. Anomalous Cowshed

    Oooh check out the groundscraper!

    Must be one of those structures formerly known as a "building"...

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Grant

    No doubt Google has filled in all the grant application forms to help pay for this...

  21. Peter Clarke 1
    Facepalm

    Retro Look

    Looks like 9 60s/70s TV sets on end. Not even widescreen

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    "We are going to invest in London"

    ...is a useful bargaining chip to have when negotiating on tax avoidance in London.

  23. Chicken Marengo
    FAIL

    Inspired by Kings Cross & St Pancras?

    St Pancras station is one of London's most beautiful buildings, whereas that pic looks like some drab box on a sixties red brick university campus.

    They must have had the inspirator mis-calibrated.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Inspired by the coffee cart on platform 3 of St Pancras

  24. messele
    Mushroom

    No wonder the building looks shit...

    ...they are not making anything like the profits to build something magnificent. They are a loss-making company in the UK don't you know!

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The aspiration is to achieve BREEAM Outstanding and LEED Platinum ratings and deliver an overall carbon saving of 40%.

    Sorry to be pedantic, but 40% compared to what?

  26. nosport

    Rectangles, always rectangles

    Yet another boring rectangular block! Overbearing, aesthetically uninspiring. In fact lazy.

    Perhaps an architect would explain why today's new buildings ALWAYS have to have 90 degree angles? Is it cost? Is it lack of imagination? Is it hard to draw anything other than rectangles in AutoCAD and ArchiCAD software? Are you scared your peers will laugh if you do something interesting?

    Look at the buildings we civilians love the most. It is very very simple: new and old, they all have at least SOME interesting angles and curves.

    Pfft.

  27. John Lodge

    FFS

    Someone should really copy this "design concept" to Prince Charles, he'd love it.

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Regernation of the area

    "We’re committed to the UK and to playing a role in the regeneration of this historic area."

    According to a documentation I watched about the redevelopment of the Kings Cross station, the residents of the area are firmly opposed to "regeneration", because the goals of "regeneration" have nothing to do with the wants or needs of the residents themselves, and everything to do with corporate greed.

  29. Arthure B. Hynde

    Tis fuggly...

    ...nuff said.

This topic is closed for new posts.

Other stories you might like