back to article The perfect gift for the pistol-packing 'Merkin: a handgun iPhone case

It is neither unkind nor inaccurate to say that for many in the land of the free and the home of the brave, their favorite bit of shiny-shiny is their handgun. Neither is it off-base to say that there exists another large number of folks whose can't-leave-home-without-it bit of kit is their iPhone. So what might be the must- …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    BAD IDEA!

    Having anything that looks like a firearm and isn't is a really, really, amazingly, spectacularly BAD idea. It is far too easy to get shot, either by a cop, or a private citizen, or a bad guy, who thinks you are armed when you are not.

    Any real NRA member who sees something like this is going to be making "get away from me" gestures.

    1. Evil Auditor Silver badge
      Gimp

      Re: BAD IDEA!

      David D. Hagood, I totally agree with you. But when you take a look at the big picture, at least in (or with) this case it will be a moronic iPhone user who's getting shot.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: BAD IDEA!

      I think this is someone seeking to introduce a kind of Darwinian selection to the sheer volume of stupid people. I can see a lot of people win a Darwin Award with this. Posthumously, of course.

      There are so many places to choose from which will produce results for any owner trying to "pull" their phone..

      - in front of armed guards, anywhere in the US

      - when the owner is about to empty pockets for a TSA queue

      - I guess anywhere in Texas (I'm not from the US, where do most of the gun nuts live?)

      - when raided because neighbours saw an armed person..

      Thankfully there are enough idiots out there - you don't have to choose one of the above options, you can try them all.

      Having said that, it's not 100% original. This issue already started to show up when someone designed a shoulder holster for the PSION Organiser II. Didn't sell all that well to travellers..

      1. 404

        'where do all the gun nuts live?'

        Perspective guidance needed here... 'Gun Nuts' as in folks that like projectile weapons and where they live or 'Gun Nuts' as in where folks that do their killing with projectile weapons live? Profound difference here.

        In any case, playing with real or having play weapons 'to astound and amuse your friends', is a stupid idea. You never reveal your cards (or your defenses) until you absolutely need to.

      2. Graham O'Brien

        Re: BAD IDEA!

        The Psion Organiser II shoulder holster was a good solution to the problem of a very heavy device weighing down jacket pockets. Though it did raise eyebrows when I went to buy a new suit and a bit of extra size in the jacket. And it was a bit embarrassing when the strap peeked out from time to time. But it was very comfortable.

        1. Shagbag

          Gay

          That's just gay.

    3. LarsG

      UK Police Armed Response Policy

      Shoot first,

      Ask questions later,

      Collude with colleges,

      Amend pocket book to suit the situation,

      Lie in court.

      Might not be a good idea to get this out in public.

    4. CmdrX3

      To be honest though

      Any muppet who would actually buy one is a walking candidate for natural selection anyway, so maybe we should just let them take their chances and hurry the process along..

  2. Citizen White
    FAIL

    I can see the headlines now

    By Local Reporter in Jerkwater USA, 29th June 2013

    A local teen was shot & killed today by Podunk County Sheriff officers when he brandished what appeared to be a handgun, but was actually a mobile phone accessory.

    "I saw the handle sticking out of his clothing. I drew my weapon & ordered him to stop. He began to pull the handle out of his pocket. I told him to drop the weapon, but he continued to draw his firearm as if he wanted to show it to me. I had no choice but to fire. I had no idea it was only a phone."

    "It looked like a gun to me. I just started firing. I had no idea that I expended that many rounds."

    1. Chimp

      Re: I can see the headlines now

      You forgot "... and reloaded five times"

    2. Charles Manning

      Could get you arrested in many US states

      In many, perhaps most, states, you do not have to pull out a gun and wave it around to be considered "brandishing" or threatening.

      If you are carrying conceiled and let your jacket fall open to allow a gun, or what appears to be a gun, to be visible then that can be considered threatening/brandishing.

      Expect a lot of people to get slammed up because they buy a dopey iphone holder but are unaware of the laws surrounding brandishing and crack a stupid joke while carrying it.

  3. Unicornpiss
    Thumb Down

    Wow...

    That is quite possibly the tackiest thing I have ever seen.

    1. ConFlap
      Facepalm

      Re: Wow...

      It really is. And as if hiding it in a plastic gun helps!

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    That's incredibly stupid. And for $9.62 it probably won't even stick to the phone for very long. Not that anyone waving it about has longevity to consider.

    1. 123465789
      Coat

      If you are stupid enough to 1) buy an iphone 2) buy this thing 3) show it in public, then humanity doesn't loose much...

      1. Ted Treen
        Thumb Down

        Stupid is as stupid does...

        "...If you are stupid enough to 1) buy an iphone..."

        If you are stupid enough to think that anyone whose thoughts or tastes are different to yours is deserving of execution, then you're not exactly humanity's greatest asset, are you?

        1. dougal83
          WTF?

          Re: Stupid is as stupid does...

          Anyone that disagrees with Ted are stupid. Yes people, the thought police have arrived. How DARE you have an opinion. How DARE you not like iPhones! ARAHHRAGRAGRHARHHAHR!!!!!! lol dumbass

          This is the internet Teddy. When people express such extreme opinions, it's usually in jest.

          1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

            Re: Stupid is as stupid does...

            I'm not sure what loose humanity is

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Paris Hilton

              Re: Stupid is as stupid does...

              <--"I'm not sure what loose humanity is"

            2. croc

              Re: Stupid is as stupid does...

              "I'm not sure what loose humanity is"

              The kind that does drugs, ho's and prons...

            3. Montreal Sean

              Re: Stupid is as stupid does...

              "I'm not sure what loose humanity is"

              I think that would be humans with loose moral values? Still not sure how it applies to the rest of what the poster had to say though.

          2. Velv

            Re: Stupid is as stupid does...

            @dougal83 "When people express such extreme opinions, it's usually in jest"

            Sorry dougal83, I'm going to disagree with you on that one. I may jest, and you may jest, but there are far to many extreme cultist people on the Internet (fanbois and fandriods) who DO take it seriously and don't see the jesty side of it no matter how outrageous or trolling it may be.

            Much like all the other cults in world who have their extremist followers with no sense of humour or reason.

  5. frank ly

    Excuse me while I fire off a few text messages

    Yes, it is a stupid idea.

  6. Cliff

    What do the decadent Western imperialists like?

    They like iPhones! They like trucks! How about a truck iphone holder? Too big... What else do they like? Eagles! Hmm, same problem. Flags have been done. Cow Pie is impractical.... They do like being loud... There must be something?!

    Sadly, I can imagine it actually would appeal - mostly to 12 year old boys and manboys (fanboy manboys, in fact) - and I can also see it ending in tears as above when someone tries to show it off in school.

  7. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Unhappy

    Demonstrating why marketing is still a bit of a black art.

    This is a perfectly logical set of decisions.

    We make accessories, what should we make?

    Stuff Americans like.

    iWhatevers and guns

    So we makes something that appeals to both areas.

    Simple.

    Logical and yet at the same time totally b**locks.

    1. Ed_UK
      Headmaster

      Re: Demonstrating why marketing is still a bit of a black art.

      "Logical and yet at the same time totally b**locks."

      Yup. Technically, it's known as a "fallacy of composition." More at:

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fallacy_of_composition

  8. jake Silver badge

    Oh, Gawd/ess ...

    ... what a stupid idea.

    The perpetrator should be taken out behind the barn & severely whipped. Now. And again tomorrow. And again on Sunday. And again every day next week. Sometimes marketing fuckwits need to feel pain ... Maybe most of the time, come to think of it ...

  9. adnim
    FAIL

    Let's see

    Downside:

    May be mistaken for a weapon.

    Upside:

    Just as useful as eyelashes on car headlights.

  10. Paul Hovnanian Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Dissapointment

    For a moment, I thought I was seeing a wave of Apple fanbois shooting themselves in the head.

    1. dougal83
      Joke

      Re: Dissapointment

      Lol. Won't do any good as most of them are brain dead! (this was a joke, for any special people reading this)

  11. Matt_payne666

    am I the only person that think the 'knife' holder (when in hand) looks like a paintbrush.......

  12. frank ly

    The next 'must have' item will be ......

    ... a gun that plays a cute ringtone when you chamber a round.

  13. skeptical i

    First, it was the pen that was mightier than the sword

    then typewriters, then keyboards, and now mobile handheld thingies. So thematically not inaccurate, but, as noted above, likely to cause bad outcomes.

    Aside from that, though, it just looks uncomfortable to use: you unholster the thing, then try to hold it with this plastic stuff around it while poking and swiping, ick.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The fact is, like Apple *most* of their customers are also liberal. Liberals don't like guns and want them banned; so they wouldn't be caught dead with this iPhone case.

    There is one exception to liberals and guns though. While liberals hate guns, the liberals they elect hire armed security for protection. So the liberal leaders feel the right to protect themselves, just everyone else should not have that same right. Case in point, Chuck Schumer and Diane Feinstein both have concealed carry permits.

    1. Intractable Potsherd

      @AC

      "While liberals hate guns, the liberals they elect hire armed security for protection. So the liberal leaders feel the right to protect themselves ..."

      I'm trying to work out what your point is here. There is a small, but not to be ignored, number of people who think that "liberal"* stance on things means that they need to be shot. Pro-choice, anti-give-anyone-a-gun campaigners have been shot, along with anyone who was stood near them (see Gabrielle Giffords, and look up the less well-reported (at least internationally) shootings and bombings of abortion clinics and supporters). There are some people that *need* to have protection.** Hell, even in the UK, politicians tend to have security, especially at cabinet level, and there aren't that many guns, and most of them are out of the hands of crazies.

      * "Liberal" in the American sense, which has a somewhat different meaning than in countries a bit less right-leaning.

      ** I'm still grappling with the concept that there is no way that the USA will ever be able to get rid of all those guns in private hands, and so there may be some truth that there are a lot more people that might need to protect themselves. Thus, a a vicious (literally and figuratively) circle is created.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    New meaning to concealed carry

    If it classify the iphone as a weapon I might just like this idea. For the sole reason if someone whips it out to have a loud overly annoying, and intentionally attention whoring conversation. I can at least do some legally about. Even if it might result in the perforation of an ugly bag of water.

    1. Mark .

      Re: New meaning to concealed carry

      If only it was just that. Round here, seems like the Apple users walk around holding their phones in front of them all the time - might as well staple a Apple logo on their heads.

      Then there's the stupid noises it makes all time, annoying when you're on a train and there's the token iphone user in the same carriage. Users of other platforms are sensible enough to switch off the sounds and change the ring tone (though, it wouldn't surprise me if IOS doesn't even have this option yet).

  16. larryk78
    Coffee/keyboard

    Miss the point much?

    Tat shops need something to sell. Other toy guns also look just like guns. Long live the Darwin Awards!

  17. brianclegg

    The perfect gift for what?

    Indeed a stupid idea. But more importantly, since a merkin is a pubic wig, just exactly what do you think the target market is?

  18. Zot
    WTF?

    This is just nerd nirvana for some 'merkuns.

    If see one, well, just laugh.

  19. Velv
    Coat

    Have you seen some of the other cases? I did not know you can Vajazzle your iPhone...

    must...google...more...pictures...

  20. Mikel
    Go

    This is going to confuse some Brits

    Although privately owned firearms outnumber the population in the US by 3:2, most of us go about our day without even seeing one. In fact, most gun owners go about their day without seeing one. Just because you own a gun doesn't mean you fall asleep fondling the damned thing, any more than you would have daily private time with a rake or wheelbarrow. If you're into that you go to range quarterly and clean it after, and back in the safe it goes. If you're not, then it never leaves the safe - or under your pillow, whichever you prefer.

    In the UK where even most of the police don't carry guns this notion must be bizarre, but in the US where guns outnumber the people the majority of non-suicide deaths by gun are dealt by the police, not criminals. Even though almost all of us have guns, we usually don't shoot each other with them. When we do our aim is usually poor and the target usually survives. The mass of rounds expended each year in the US exceeds the mass of people killed by a good bit, as it did in the US civil war.

    Another reason not to mess with Switzerland. Not only to they all have fine rifles, but they never miss.

    1. Intractable Potsherd

      Re: This is going to confuse some Brits

      "Even though almost all of us have guns, we usually don't shoot each other with them. When we do our aim is usually poor and the target usually survives."

      So why have them?

  21. graeme leggett Silver badge

    Happy Elephant Special....

    can I get that without mushrooms?

  22. graeme leggett Silver badge

    Interesting buyer recommendations on that website

    iPhone case

    iPhone case

    iPhone case

    iPhone case

    iPhone case

    iPhone case

    iPhone case

    knickers ("Women Sexy Panties Grenadine Transparent T-back Embroidery Lace G-string Bowknot Lingerie Underwear")

    who buys a box of iPhone cases and box of ladies' skimpy nether garments?

    1. jake Silver badge

      @graeme leggett (was: Re: Interesting buyer recommendations on that website)

      Uh ... testosterone poisoned teenage boys with daddy's credit-card, and parents who neither monitor telephone use of their sprog, or the credit-card bill?

      Rich western trash, by any other name.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Gun that looks like an iPhone

    THAT is what a real "gun nut" would want.

    Not this silly thing.

  24. 2StrokeRider
    FAIL

    Nope...American gun owners don't carry fake gun anything, nor do concealed carry holders advertise their carry. NRA members wouldn't be the folks you'd see with these, they'd be bought by the non-gun owning crowd thinking they are 'cool', and land them in an embarrassing or dangerous situation.

    All in all quite a silly idea for a product, but there are quite a few silly people that will buy it.

  25. Oninoshiko
    Trollface

    I'm afraid this one may be my fault

    See, I said "I'd rather shoot an apple product then use it." Something got a little lost in the translation.

  26. Neil Anderson
    Trollface

    Playlist addition: Pistol Packin Mama

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