Sign in / up

back to article Apple claims shot in arm for Cupertino from new Fruit Loop HQ

Apple has claimed its massive new ring-shaped Cupertino headquarters will create 7,400 new jobs and sustain thousands more in the local area. The fruity firm's gigantic new Apple Campus 2 building, which it would seem reasonable to dub the Fruit Loop, looks more like a vast modernist doughnut (or breakfast unit) than a …

COMMENTS

House rules Send corrections
This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. Alan Bourke
    Pint

    Insert ring jokes

    below.

    0 0
    1. tomban
      Reply Icon
      Joke

      Re: Insert ring jokes

      One ring to rule them all

      1 0
      1. VinceH
        Reply Icon
        Trollface

        Re: Insert ring jokes

        "One ring to rule them all"

        One ring to rule them all,

        One ring to bind them.

        One ring to bring them all,

        And in the courthouse fine them.

        Oh, wait, no, that's questionable patents, not rings.

        0 0
    2. graeme leggett Silver badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: Insert ring jokes

      If I've understood the mayor's response correctly

      -they've run rings round the opposition....

      0 0
    3. Khaptain Silver badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: Insert ring jokes

      Isn't "ring" a synonym for arsehole.

      So effectivelly , Apple have created the largest arsehole in the world and everyday it's employees will be coming and going into said orifice.

      0 1
      1. Anonymous Coward
        Reply Icon
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Insert ring jokes

        In that case, GCHQ has the second biggest arsehole in the UK... Not sure the spooks will like that. :-)

        0 0
  2. Darryl
    Trollface

    Too bad they don't pay tax on any of that $150B

    0 2
  3. NoneSuch Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    "The fruity firm's gigantic new Apple Campus 2 building, which it would seem reasonable to dub the Fruit Loop..."

    OMG, I have not laughed that hard in some time. Massive pay rise for the one who thought that up.

    5 0
    1. JaimieV
      Reply Icon
      Go

      Seconded - superb coinage! Speaking as an Apple-gear addict myself.

      0 0
    2. Anonymous Coward
      Reply Icon
      Anonymous Coward

      I prefer

      the term fruity sphincter.

      1 0
  4. JDX Gold badge

    $175 for a turtleneck?

    Wow. Oh wow.

    1 3
    1. Otto is a bear.
      Reply Icon

      Re: $175 for a turtleneck?

      Not looked at the current full retail prices for oooh, Ralph Lauren and alike then, obviously Apple knows it's market. The clotted cream of the world.

      I baulked at $100 for a polo shirt. I'll stick to M & S I think.

      0 0
      1. Anonymous Coward
        Reply Icon
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: $175 for a turtleneck?

        $$ in M&S? I thought the USA M&S closed years ago. What one learns on the Register!

        .

        0 0
  5. lglethal Silver badge
    WTF?

    Apple fines its staff? WTF?

    I dont care if its $5, any company that tried to fine me would quickly find itself with a position to fill and a burgeoning reputation of being complete a$$hats!

    1 1
    1. Tom 35
      Reply Icon

      Re: Apple fines its staff? WTF?

      Maybe they have a big swear jar. Say a bad word* and you pay.

      * Example: Samsung, Android, Tax, Amazon...

      2 0
      1. gerryg
        Reply Icon
        Gimp

        Re: Apple fines its staff? WTF?

        ...open standards, interoperability

        2 0
    2. Anonymous Coward
      Reply Icon
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Apple fines its staff? WTF?

      It says Cupertino fines them. That's the name of the city. That's actually not much for the number of employees they have. Cupertino must not have very many parking meters.

      0 0
  6. Petersbear
    Thumb Down

    How many new HQ buildings?

    I used to work for CDC they built a new HQ in Minneapolis before going bust. Then another company that built a new HQ at Eagan. Add to that the Royal Bank of Scotland where my pay used to go. If you work for Apple be very afraid, mean time to failure no more than 5 years.

    2 0
  7. Larry Ellinson
    Angel

    flagpole

    There is a rule of thumb that stockholders should get out of a company the moment they build a new headquarters with a pond and a flagpole as it's all downhill from there on in.

    Is there a flagpole?

    Is there a pond?

    We need to know.

    1 0
  8. Herby

    Remember what they called the restaraunt at the center of the Pentagon!

    Ground Zero

    Maybe they can repeat this for the Apple Doughnut (whatever it is called).

    Now, if they succeed in getting it named a foreign country so they can bring in all the overseas profits, they could pave the place with gold bricks!

    0 0
    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: Remember what they called the restaraunt at the center of the Pentagon!

      "Now, if they succeed in getting it named a foreign country so they can bring in all the overseas profits, they could pave the place with gold bricks!"

      Sort of like Vatican City? Hmm...All they need is a prophet and a cult following and...erm...

      3 1
  9. Mpeler
    Go

    Apple Donut

    More like Apple Fritter....Apple frittering away a lot of money on an HQ on the old HP Cupertino site...probably some sort of "triumph" for the apple-pan-dowdies who were rejected by Bill and Dave back in the day... Maybe they could make the building rotate, like in 2001 A Space Odyssey...don't get your code done on time (or on spec) end up stuck to the wall in a spinning building....so much for lunch....

    Bring back Alltronics, Curtis Trading Company, Wierd Stuff, and all the rest...where did the REAL valley go?

    0 1
  10. localzuk Silver badge

    Not going to house everyone?

    So they're building a massive new site, but it still won't cater to all of their staff in one place? Seems a bit odd to do that. Why not build one complex that houses their entire Cupertino workforce? Cuts down on people travelling to meetings within the city...

    0 0
  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Curved Windows!!!!!

    Eadon will NOT be happy

    1 0
  12. Jes.e

    Two questions..

    1. They intend to make money from their cafeteria?!? Don't they make enough money from their fine products?

    2. I've heard this building described as "futuristic" in other articles; are there going to be people movers or personal transport pods? (You know, instead of elevators.)

    BTW. Good call on those who mentioned the Pentagon. Similar thinking. (Now what were they thinking?)

    0 0
This topic is closed for new posts.

Other stories you might like