back to article NASA on alert: International Space Station springs a leak

It's going to be a tense 24 hours for the crew of the International Space Station after Commander Chris Hadfield reported that the ammonia coolant used in the station's power systems appears to be leaking into space. "There's a very steady stream of flakes or bits coming out as the truss is rotating," he said in a discussion …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Baikonur, we have a problem.

    Not a very funny one, though.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Baikonur, we have a problem.

      Love the way NASA plays down the problem up there, while reports are coming through that they are also denying that that there is any truth that a senior mission control operator was seen running down the corridors screaming 'oh my God, oh no..... No no no no......'

      1. Ryan 7
        FAIL

        Re: running down the corridors screaming

        I don't think there would be any truth in reports of running in the ISS' corridors.

      2. Anonymous John

        Re: Baikonur, we have a problem.

        You are a Daily Mail reader, AICM5P.

  2. Robert Heffernan
    Thumb Up

    Easy Fix!!!

    Duct Tape. Nuff said!

    1. Wzrd1 Silver badge

      Re: Easy Fix!!!

      They use Kapton now. Far more secure in space.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Easy Fix!!!

      Isn't that "Duck Tape"?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Easy Fix!!!

        No it isn't. Duck tape is a brand name, the tape itself is Duct

        1. Dave 126 Silver badge

          Re: Easy Fix!!!

          >No it isn't. Duck tape is a brand name, the tape itself is Duct

          Yes it is- 'duck tape' was the generic term. Using the tape for ducting was a later application.

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duct_tape#History_and_etymology

    3. I think so I am?
      Coat

      Re: Easy Fix!!!

      Its going to be a square hole, meets cycle pipe issue.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "and if they're really unlucky Hadfield might break out the station's guitar and sing them some of his songs"

    Makes Chris Hadfield's songs sound worse than Vogon poetry :

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrIrcV9Bgmc

    1. Stoke the atom furnaces

      Now either die in the black vacuum of space... or tell me how good you thought my song was.

    2. Oliver Mayes

      I really want to believe that there is an emergency guitar on the ISS. Preferably in a glass case on the wall.

      1. Anonymous Custard
        Joke

        It could have been worse

        At least he and Shatner only talked a couple of months back, rather than doing a duet...

      2. The First Dave
        Boffin

        Preferably NOT in a glass case, if you think about it.

  4. Blofeld's Cat
    Devil

    Expert help...

    >Ring< >click<

    "Hello. Mario Brothers Plumbing here ... NASA who? ... Oh that NASA. What seems to be the problem? ... Coolant leak you say. [Sharp intake of breath] Well I don't know, they can be a real problem those. Unit's obsolete of course, all metric these days ... Urgent you say? ... OK, it's outside our usual manor, but I'll get one of the lads to stick his head in and have a look ... When? Can't promise it'll be today but I'll see what we can do ... How much will it cost? Hard to say without seeing the job. The call-out fee's a hundred quid, and there's the travel at two quid a mile ..."

    1. I think so I am?
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Expert help...

      Hes gonna be left a little short asking for £2 quid a mile for travel cost.

      1. mike2R
        Thumb Up

        Re: Expert help...

        Probably depends on how many orbits it takes to dock with the ISS. Wiki says it is travelling at 17,277mph, which is a lot of two quids...

        1. I think so I am?
          Meh

          Re: Expert help...

          You tend to go up and wait for it to come back around again. and up its only about 300km

          1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge
            Boffin

            Re: Expert help...

            If you just went up, you'd find yourself back down agin rather quickly. You actually have to go into orbit, in a lower orbit with a shorter orbital period than the ISS if you want to catch up to it, then transfer to the same orbit, or a higher orbit with a longer period if you want it to catch up with you (I think it's that way round, I stand to be corrected). I believe most launches destined to the ISS take a number of complete orbits before they rendezvous. Either way, you'd still be orders of magnitude short on cost at £2 a mile...

  5. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Pint

    I think the next step...

    ...is to lose track of the station's cat.

    1. Tom 13

      Re: I think the next step...

      Just as long as the snake doesn't eat the baby, everything should be OK.

  6. izntmac

    Good Job USA!

    We have this space station that cost billions of dollars to build. Its orbit used to be raised every once in a while by the Space Shuttle that we didn't keep flying. The US Government is too cheap to keep the Shuttles flying or fund a successor rocket system for manned space flight. The Space Station springs a leak. What if we can't get the parts up there to fix it or replacement ammonia. We are relying on the Russians, private industry, or other "international partners'. We don't have the capacity to do it through NASA anymore. Not too smart in the long run.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Nork to the rescue!

      Who is this not-too-smart "we" and why does he rely on "private industry" instead of glorious socialist hardware?

    2. Ryan 7
      Stop

      Re: Good Job USA!

      It's... not the US's sole property.

    3. Yag

      Re: Good Job USA!

      i thought you were talking about Skylab at first...

      Then I remembered the delays on the shuttle leading to a littering ticket for the NASA.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    here we go

    humans in space = pollution in space

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: here we go

      We are not talking about lawyers here....

  8. Bod
    Joke

    Coolant leak!

    Quick, get Geordi on the case.

    Failing that, eject the core or abandon ship and let it blow up.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    "Baikonur, we've had a problem."

    There. Fixed it.

  10. A Nother Handle
    Pirate

    "The hull has been breached and the science is leaking out!"

    Space Pirate icon because there isn't one with zombies.

  11. Grey Bird
    Joke

    Ammonia, you say?

    Sounds like the space station is just taking a leak. (Oh come on, you know you were thinking it!)

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