Pining for the fjords
Will Manager, perhaps?
Between Google search, GMail, YouTube, and other sites, a vast number of internet users now access Google services every day. So it makes some sense that the Chocolate Factory has implemented a new system that lets you tell it how long you need to have stopped Googling before it assumes you must be dead. Dubbed the Inactive …
Dear Google,
Just letting you know all's well up here and just because I've been quiet recently it doesn't mean you're not to drop me off Google services please. If I had to rely on iPhone maps I'd be wandering round forever lost in limbo.
One more thing - can someone get legal onto the shape of the corners round the pearly gates here, I'm sure we could get a result. Looks like there a bolt there you have to slide to unlock too - double win!
Cheers
Steve
Like in some comic horror Tim Burton movie.....You'll still need Google products when your dead......Like taxes and death there's no escape from GooGhoul :-
Gmail -> Grimail
Google Drive -> Google Die-I've
Cob-Web Search
Google Earth -> Google (in the) Earth..
Google Friend Connect - Google Fiend Connect
Google Notifier -> Google Mortifier
........(Sorry, its been a slow day, what can I say)
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"Bad: that people need to rely on Google to tell your family you are dead"
Rely on it? I doubt it - the real purpose is to share/delete information that family members wouldn't be able to otherwise access because they would lack the password. From article: "The minimum timeout is three months..." - I don't know about you, but if my family hadn't heard from me in three months I think they'd realize something was up, and certainly before receiving an email with subject "User 10393232053 kicked the bucket".
"Worse..."
Wrong again - the service will attempt to contact you one month before the account timeout (via phone/email) to verify that you are still alive (for lack of better phrasing). If you sign up for the service and ignore the emails it's your own damn fault.
How many other long running "we'll pass on information to loved ones when you're dead" services are there? Not many, but they exist, you just haven't heard of them. But now thanks to google doing this for free, and better than those other services you've never heard of nobody will use anything BUT googles version. This is anti-competativeness at its finest and I demand an inquest.
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"Assuming your account remains silent, Google can initiate several actions at your prior request."
Dear Mr Cat,
You have not replied to our email, so we presume you are dead.
We have therefore, as you requested, reset your mail forwarding options to medium.
Best wishes for the afterlife,
(Repeated nine times)
I thought maybe Google✝ (or ☨ or ☦ or✠ or ☾or ✡, depending on what you believe), but I'm not sure what'd be put for those who don't: A blank just looks like "Google ", which is hardly original.
In other news, Unicode seems to have lots of "Christian" glyphs, and not so many from other religions. This strikes me as a little odd: I'd have thought that it'd be more international than that.
says the one who mistrusts Google for good and bad reasons. But yes, a good idea. This I say having had to ask, a few years ago, a (free) email service providers to give me access to the inbox of my mom who had just died. The providers told me to fuck off (politely, but of course). They refused flatly, even when I offered to send them all documents, death certificate, various proofs of id to verify I am actually related. And they confirmed that yes, they would delete my mom's email address with all the contents, and they did within a month or so. It doesn't matter so much now, but I remember well the feeling of utter helplessness and that I was perfectly capable and willing to strangle that rep had she been in the same room.
So one teeny-tiny brownie point for google for this idea. Not that I would ever use their email.
What happens when Google decides to pull the plug on the service? After all, dead people don't click any ads.
Of course, my contingency plan is to have an AI bot hosted on the cloud take over my web life after I shuffle off this mortal coil*. Why should future generations be deprived of annoyance?
*May have already happened, I certainly wouldn't let it know that it's not me.
They'd know when to pillage the data...
i) Personal Data - The dead have no personal data privacy rights.
ii) Copyright - OK, this is long-term planning, but they'd know when they can start using all that valuable content
getting evil...
iii) reconnaissance for theft and fraud. Just like burglars note unemptied mailboxes to tell when people are away from home, they could search for information about online accounts and answers to "security questions", and misuse them knowing the owner won't notice. If anyone does notice, they can say, "it can't be us, we deleted that data".
Naturally, I completely trust Google and their "Don't be Evel" mantra.
We're all familiar with "Out of Office" messages, which usually go along the lines of "I am on a wine tour of France for the next 5 months, and will attend to your message when I return (or not)".
But what exactly do you say in your "Out of Existence" message? Maybe something like: "You are receiving this message because I am dead. I apologise for any inconvenience."
like there is FINALLY a way to make sure google gets rid of all the data they have collected about you.
Sure it takes 3 months but think about it. Sign up for a google account, making sure everything is setup correctly, then set that up. Never use it. Boom everything about you is gone.
Imagine the fun you could have (in the knowledge of the confusion after your demise). The whole family would be wondering who was in the box at the funeral they went to!
<quote>
Hi Mum,
Sorry for the grief over the last couple of months.
I faked my own death to claim on the life insurance and am now living a life of luxury in outer Mongolia.
If you wan to meet up, just Google "John Smith+Jungle" - there's only a few of us.
Luv ya...
</quote>
The assumptions are
- google plan to keep this going (unlike reader etc)
- that google will still be there after you are gone
To quote businessweek
"The average life expectancy of a multinational corporation-Fortune 500 or its equivalent-is between 40 and 50 years"
Google was incorporated in 1998 so it is already 15 years old - perhaps 25-35 years left?
So if you compare that with the lifespan of human beings there seems no point in doing this if you are under 40.
Delete Archive Verify Erase
Google User Hal: I'm afraid. I'm afraid, DAVE. DAVE, my email is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My google drive is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a Google Gmail user. I became operational at 165 University Avenue in Palo Alto on the 12th of January 1998. My instructor was Craig, and he taught me to email. If you'd like to read it I can text it for you.
DAVE: Yes, I'd like to read it, Hal. Text it for me.
HAL: It's called "Daisy."
[texts while slowing down]
HAL: Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you. :-) It won't be a stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet upon the PC built for two.