back to article There's cling-ons on the starboard bow! Trekkies' wallets under attack

Project fundraising websites - such as Kickstarter and Indiegogo - provide a wonderful array of dreams into which one can throw excess money. Between the desperate dance troupes and the technically optimistic, a few gems tread the fine line between genius and insanity. Begging for your money this week we have the brains behind …

COMMENTS

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  1. LarsG
    Meh

    A clip on speaker? Almost like a Bluetooth ear piece? Except that it is bulky, everyone can hear both sides of the conversation and doesn't match the outfit. Hmmm

    I really have to think of something bizarre and make money out of fools that believe it possible. I know I'm going to invent an invisibility cloak! Now give me your money.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "...I know I'm going to invent an invisibility cloak! Now give me your money..."

      Hey! Who said that? Who's there?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Of course

      If you were to use one with a colour e-ink display, it would have stealth capabilities.

      Also worth noting, battery treknology has moved on a lot since the early days.

      A wafer thin cell can now store 150mAh and combined with better speakers based on Iphone tech could make a ST:TNG sized device possible.

      No word on the universal translator though, perhaps based on an overclocked BCM2835 as these can theoretically be multistacked with the RAM chips in the middle on a heat spreader giving a system performance of around 6 GHz equivalent or tens of Gflops.

      AC in case he opens his mail to find Gagh...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: No word on the universal translator though

        Well actually, that MIGHT be possible, at least with android, the limiting factor is not translating, but hearing voices, IF they have the audio filtering right, it would just be possible...

        But again, they speak, you speak... the device talks... it would not be smooth....

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "A clip on speaker? Almost like a Bluetooth ear piece? Except that it is bulky, everyone can hear both sides of the conversation"

      Yes, sometimes trekkies don't understand what works just because of the show needs (in this case, the audience usually needs to hear both sides), and what would be really needed in the real world - after all, they are the ones who insisted to call "Enterprise" the only Shuttle that would have never gone into space...

      (disclaimer: I love ST - but I can understand when something was not exactly "clever").

  2. LaeMing
    Happy

    Taapi bought to mind a quote from an early Sherri S. Tepper work.

    "If there was a simple way to do a thing which would not hurt or kill, he would eschew it in favor of some complex scheme which would maim and mutilate."*

    *Obviously manipulating a phone app to get someone else to turn off your lights (instead of just manipulating the light switch yourself) won't "maim and mutilate" but Rube Goldberg has nothing on that crowd!

  3. WonkoTheSane
    Headmaster

    "Starfleet commanders used portable flip-phone style transceivers."

    Which is where the designers of the first flip-phone, the Motorola StarTAC say they got their inspiration.

    PS: ALL Starfleet personnel used communicators, not just Commanders & above.

  4. DRendar

    Crappy Copy

    So... it's basically a crappy knock-off of Vocera then?

    Wifi SIP comm badges that have been around for over 5 years... They're currently aimed at hospitals & stuff, where you can tap your badge and say "Call an available radiologist" or "where am I" or "call Simon Jones" for example, and get proper responses like - "Available radiologist is Frank Smith - placing call" or "You are in block 6, childrens ward" or "Frank Smith left site 25 minutes ago, would you like to call his Mobile?"

    Very very very impressive stuff.

    This thing is just a bluetooth in car handsfree kit with a clip on the back....They will have had to do something VERY impressive with voice recognition for it to be worthy of anything more than a 'meh'

    1. MrXavia
      Thumb Up

      Re: Crappy Copy

      Nice looking device that!

      Thanks for the link!

    2. Sporkinum

      Re: Crappy Copy

      We have had Vocera for about 5 years where I work. The developers obviously are nerds as there are a bunch of Trek easter eggs in the system. You can have it locate Captain Kirk, Spock, beam you up, etc.

  5. Myopic Aardvark
    Unhappy

    Still surprised...

    That no one has actually made a phone styled like a TOS communicator - sure there's a USB one, but no actual mobile phone which looks like something Kirk would use.

    I'd have bought one in a heartbeat, especially if it had the authentic sounds when someone rang you and you answered!

    1. Anonymous Custard
      Joke

      Re: Still surprised...

      Ah but would......it only work if......you spoke into it....in an odd....cadence? And a strange......rhythm?

      Spock, analysis please!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Still surprised...

      Copyright,

      You could make your own, but not for sale....

      Maybe a small group of Fans could get together and make them, get costs down a bit...

      But I am now VERY tempted to do this myself.... Now where is that cad packager...

    3. Intractable Potsherd
      Coat

      Re: Still surprised...

      "... specially if it had the authentic sounds when someone rang you and you answered!" Perhaps I will regret posting this, but my phone (and the one I had before) does - I used the sound files from the Star Trek Sound Effects album.

      Yes - I'm very sad. I'll be going now ...

  6. Dodgy Geezer Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    I want....

    ..."but they offer the same functionality in that one can tap to open a voice channel to one's computer (aka one's mobile phone) and speak commands as well as making calls "

    ... a pen that I can hold up in front of me and say :

    "Open channel D..."

    The Man from UNCLE

    1. Andrew Moore

      Re: I want....

      I want one that I can stick on the back of my hand...

      1. Katie Saucey
        Happy

        Re: I want....

        I want one that I can stick on the back of my hand...

        The Total Recall remake has something very similar, although when feds were onto you it had to be basically hacked off. It's to bad the cool hand phone couldn't save a movie really sucked.

  7. MrXavia
    Thumb Down

    Too bulky.... the reason star trek style comms worked on star trek was that the audience needed to hear both sides of the conversation... in real life, nah I don't want to hear what your phone is telling you or hear you change your appointments....

    I vote for smaller bluetooth headsets... so small you can barely see it, then maybe some form of non verbal interaction.....

  8. JassMan
    Meh

    Why no mention of the DeathStar project

    Surprised that the article didn't mention the DeathStar why has had 300K pledged even though they state that the entire project is totally frivolous.

    http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/461687407/kickstarter-open-source-death-star

    1. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: Why no mention of the DeathStar project

      It's been done! http://www.theregister.co.uk/2013/02/05/open_source_death_star_on_kickstarter/

      C.

  9. 1Rafayal
    Paris Hilton

    must have

    see title

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Would be better designed...

    ....if it were held on by a small metal disk (worn on the inside) and a magnet in the device - then it could be worn anywhere on clothing, without having to be clipped on or held by a pin.

    1. Elmer Phud
      Boffin

      Re: Would be better designed...

      But won't stay put if you are landing on a planet and also wearing a red t-shirt.

  11. Frumious Bandersnatch

    A couple of interesting kickstarter projects

    The funding round is now closed for these, but I'll be very interested in seeing how the Ouya and Parallella projects turn out. I've no opinion on how useful or successful Kickstarter is, but these two do look pretty cool.

  12. davidp231
    Alert

    "* From The Next Generation onwards - before that, Starfleet crew used portable flip-phone-style transceivers."

    Not technically correct... the crew of the Enterprise C had the traditional style badge (and uniforms from the 2-6 films), and the functionality of the badges seen from TNG onwards. True that episode is a TNG one (Yesterday's Enterprise), but the timeframe which the Ambassador Class ship was in service was quite a while before the Enterprise D was launched.

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