back to article Entire Reg readership would fill 205 Olympic-sized swimming pools

Last week, we announced that according to the Audit Bureau of Circulation, a record 7,326,907 unique users visited El Reg in November 2012. An Olympic-sized swimming pool Impressive stuff, which prompted one reader to ask: "Is it just me, or does anyone else want to know how many Olympic-size swimming pools that number of …

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  1. Andrew Moore
    Coat

    There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

    ...about us lot of commentards being the "golden shower"

    1. Andrew Moore

      Re: There has to be a joke in there somewhere...

      dammit "there" not "their"

      Didn't we get the option to edit our posts within a certain timeframe?

      1. Lars Silver badge
        FAIL

        Re: There has to be a joke in there somewhere...

        "Didn't we get the option to edit our posts within a certain timeframe?"

        Time-frame or timeframe, never mind, but how does this editing your post actually work. I have "decided" to first use some editor, get sober, sleep a night, and then decide about posting, or editing, or just forgetting about it. Not much progress so far.

    2. Code Monkey
      Unhappy

      Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

      More of a golden trickle. 1.66 elephants per day isn't even a paltry 0.00002 elephants per second - the correct measure, as any fule kno.

      1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

        Re: Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

        That's actually 1.66 elephants per minute

      2. Zaphod.Beeblebrox
        Headmaster

        Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

        That's 1.66 elephants per *minute*, far more than a trickle...

        1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

          Re: Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

          Snap

          1. LinkOfHyrule
            Pint

            1.66 elephants per minute

            I do hope you guys don't wee in swimming pools - if not we're all going to drown pretty damn quick!

    3. Bill B
      Pint

      Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

      It took me a re-read to realise they were talking about filling the pools with the Reg Readers, not filling the pool with what Reg Readers recycle on a Friday night out.

      My first reaction to the headline was "ewwwww!!"

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Does this

      Take into account all the fat Americans or is it a average?

    5. Mips
      Childcatcher

      Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

      HOW DARE YOU - compare me to an Olympic size swimming pool.

      My weight in gold - well that alright.

    6. cortland
      Paris Hilton

      Re: There has to be a joke in their somewhere...

      Yah, well, that bit about laid end to end has possibilities. World record for simultaneous ... smiles, maybe.

      Paris. Because.

  2. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Play hard to get

    > Laid head-to-toe

    If there's any "laying" to be done, I'd want someone to buy me dinner first.

    1. FartingHippo
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Play hard to get

      "Laid head-to-toe" is also about 0.75m out of the optimum position, which of course involves a 50% overlap...

    2. Steven Raith
      Thumb Up

      Re: Play hard to get

      I'll buy you fish and chips to do my patio.

      Deal?

      1. Pete 2 Silver badge

        Re: Play hard to get

        > Deal?

        Maybe - please send photo of the fish

  3. deadlockvictim

    Our volume in Bulgarian Airbags?

    Inquiring minds want to know, please.

    1. davemcwish

      Re: Our volume in Bulgarian Airbags?

      @deadlockvictim 890483714.1468 (C-cup Posh Spice)

  4. Colin Millar
    Coat

    All very well but

    If they all farted* at once how far would that propel a sheep in a vacuum?

    * a medium curry and two guinness brew

    1. mike2R
      Boffin

      Re: All very well but

      Assuming the sheep was in inter-stella space, and not pointed at anything with gravity sufficent to capture it, to the ends of the unverse.

      1. Silverburn
        Happy

        Re: All very well but

        Hopefully it will get there in time to be slaughtered and served as chops at the restaurant there. It's quite good apparently.

      2. Chemist

        Re: All very well but

        "to the ends of the unverse"

        Truly a big bang !

      3. Kubla Cant

        Re: All very well but

        "Assuming the sheep was in inter-stella space..."

        So that's a pint of lager, then a sheep, followed by another pint of lager? Sounds like a glamorous night out.

        I won't ask what you do with the sheep.

    2. Eddy Ito

      Re: All very well but

      I suppose it depends on whether the sheep was used to make the curry.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: All very well but

      "If they all farted* at once"

      It wouldn't BE a vacuum then!

      Here's one worthy of Randall Munroe - what would the radiation pressure of the body heat of all those readers be? Express your answer in Norris.

  5. Admiral Grace Hopper

    If the entire Reg readership were laid end-to-end

    I, for one, would be very surprised indeed.

  6. SmallYellowFuzzyDuck, how pweety!
    Coat

    So that explains everything!

    It's used to be a select little club of commentards here, now the rest of the world has jumped on the bandwagon. It's gone from quality to quantity.

    Anyhow, time to leave before I get my head kicked in by a raging mob...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: So that explains everything!

      >It's gone from quality to quantity.

      Just like the articles then. I think you might have stumbled upon El Reg's new motto.

      Anyhow, time to leave before I get my head kicked in by a raging Lester...

      1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

        Re: Re: So that explains everything!

        Ahem

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: So that explains everything!

          oops! Ó+(

    2. Darryl

      Re: So that explains everything!

      Aw, man, you guys sold out! I used to like you when you were cool, but now you're just a corporate shill. A tool of the Man, etc. etc.

  7. Phil Birch

    Well blended

    The only way to get us into that many pools is to blend us all first into mush. Assuming we aren't blended and modelling us as a cylinder 50cm diameter and 1.776m high, I work that out as 1020.83 swimming pools.

    (A cuboid would be a better model still but I've got work to do)

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: Well blended

      >I work that out as 1020.83 swimming pools.

      That looks like false precision to me, unless you have data on the volume of all Reg readers! Have you installed sensors in our bath tubs? Eureka! : D

      False precision:

      "A guide in the museum tells visitors that this dinosaur fossil is 200 million and 4 years old... when asked, he says "Well, when I started working here they told me it was 200 million years old, and I've been working here for four years..."

    2. Silverburn

      Re: Well blended

      I think I mentioned this in a reply to the original commentard post. However, they do mention the average volume of a reader, so that has, essentially been taken into effect. Except volume != actual volume in this case, given the general "blobby-ness" of the human shape.

      1. Dave 126 Silver badge

        Re: Well blended

        >Except volume != actual volume

        Quite right, I mentioned 'Eureka' (finding volume through displacement, a la Archimedes), but that still wouldn't account for cavities such as the lungs, sinuses and the interiors of some commentards' skulls.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Well blended

      Relevant XKCD:

      http://what-if.xkcd.com/4/

      1. Martin Budden Silver badge

        Re: Well blended

        "You might notice that we’re ignoring the pockets of space between the moles. In a moment, you’ll see why."

        (b)arf!

  8. Dave 126 Silver badge

    If all Reg readers are together in 205 Olympic-sized swimming pools, I can only ask: "Where can I get 205 sharks with laser beams?"

  9. Annihilator
    Unhappy

    70kg is being kind??

    70kg = 11 stone something-or-other, right? Way to make me feel depressed! Though at 6 feet tall, I'm hoping there's some wiggleroom there..

    1. Z80

      Re: 70kg is being kind??

      Don't worry, I'm under by enough for the rest of you to average 70.0000012kg

      Happy to help.

  10. Ed 13
    Joke

    If all the fish caught in one year...

    ... were laid end to end across the dessert, the smell would be appalling!

    1. SmallYellowFuzzyDuck, how pweety!
      Headmaster

      Re: If all the fish caught in one year...

      I bet it would taste disgusting as well.

    2. Evil Auditor Silver badge

      Re: If all the fish caught in one year...

      ...not to the common Icelandic nose, I guess.

    3. Darryl

      Re: If all the fish caught in one year...

      Yeah, I'd much prefer chocolate sauce or ice cream or something over my dessert.

  11. Scott Wheeler
    Holmes

    Jokkmokk?

    Popn 2500 - only reason I know of it is because it's on the Kungsleden long distance path.

  12. Senior Ugli
    Coffee/keyboard

    "204.92 Olympic-sized swimming pools."

    or 5 of Kim Dotcoms fridges

  13. El Bob
    Thumb Up

    Finally

    My mind is at rest.......thanks!!

  14. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Pint

    Regarding the "liquid output"

    doesn't that depend heavily on the liquid input?

  15. Evil Auditor Silver badge
    Holmes

    Massive Northern American readership

    I beg to differ. While the average European weighs about 70kg this holds not true for the average Northern American. Add another 10kg for the 3m readers and you'd still be kind to the pizza-engorged sysadmins.

    1. SkippyBing

      Re: Massive Northern American readership

      It does seem a bit on the low side, I think ICAO allow airlines to use an average of 80kg per passenger to avoid weighing everyone at check-in.

  16. drand

    Name that pool

    I think that might the Mountbatten Centre pool in Pompey - anyone kno' betta?

    1. Steve Dulieu

      Re: Name that pool

      Looks like Wathamstow to me...

  17. NomNomNom

    what if you cut us open and stretch our intestines out as far as they will stretch end-to-end. How far would we reach then? I've always been fascinated by such questions since childhood.

    1. SmallYellowFuzzyDuck, how pweety!

      You wouldn't be able to reach any distance because you would be dead, duh.

  18. HaplessPoet
    Headmaster

    is there a digit missing from "stretch 92,947,43 linguine"

  19. Ketlan
    Happy

    Sheepish

    'If they all farted* at once how far would that propel a sheep in a vacuum?'

    Now THAT is an interesting question. And not one one hears every day.

  20. This post has been deleted by its author

  21. Gray Ham Bronze badge
    Pint

    Melbourne to Chelyabinsk

    I bag one of the positions in Bali ...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Melbourne to Chelyabinsk

      Be my guest, let me know how it works out for you.

    2. Roger Kynaston
      Pint

      Re: Melbourne to Chelyabinsk

      Just make sure you haven't got any Colombian nose candy on your person though.

  22. JibberJabberBadger
    Childcatcher

    Imperialsim!

    US dollars?

    Kilometres?

    What are these strange things you talk of?

    Perhaps you misspelt pounds sterling and miles.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Childcatcher

    The people want to know...

    How many Soylent Green biscuits will that make?

    Please start forming an orderly queue...

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