Experts troll 'biggest security mag in the world' with DICKish submission

I bet d***s against c***s

that in reply to your request for a comment, you will receive a request to come up with an article on their latest dicks.

p.s. as it's Friday, there's no greater ill-pleasure then to watch a "business" burying itself furiously with such legal threats. Perhaps it's a proof this Hakin9 is run by humans, not bots, as they are capable of learning from past case studies :)

Amazing...

"Furthermore, we reduced the effective tape drive throughput of our stochastic overlay network. Similarly, we tripled the effective floppy disk space of our Internet-2 overlay"

Once something has been done it all seems so obvious, and I'm just left wondering why no-one thought of this earlier. No doubt Apple have already patented it, and I look forward to the day that Apple include this marvellous advance in their iPhone. Shortly followed by the Samsung lawsuit.

cool!, but depressing

Thats pretty cool, but its not that surprising a freeloading site like that was fooled

I was more amazed by the

"generates random Computer Science research papers"

http://pdos.csail.mit.edu/scigen/

mentioned in the article - those guys submitted similar bullshit to conferences and even delivered talks in person!

I know a lot of people on a lot more money than me who couldnt spot one of theses articles to save their life - in fact being highly paid seems to be a prerequisite - it means your watching people work ( aka managing or supervising) rather than doing it , therefore no need to actually know anything.

Freaking Users Can Keep On Freezing Files

wow

Not a bad article

But I preffered their one about Penetrating Encrypted Networks In Secret.

2600 want free articles too

But then 2600 also edit them for content and relevance and produce a darn fine mag.

Oh, and send you 4 issues for your trouble.

How to tell a security specialist

> these security specialists are regularly spammed with requests to submit articles

Surely any self-respecting (or even slightly competent) security "specialist" would never do anything as naive as giving out a real email address to an online publication?

Just class :)

"Our experiments soon proved that exokernelizing our fuzzy Knesis keyboards was more effective than making autonomous them, as previous work suggested."

The way of the world...

They got punked, now they're screaming lawyers. Typical. Although I suspect the threats are "unspecified" as there is little they can devise that doesn't translate to "we were twats".

As for the article, some fine bull. Brilliant.

"our heuristic prevents metamorphic epistemologies"

is almost as good as the Rockwell Turbo Encabulator's "sinusoidal depleneration"!

Can't wait to include some of this in my next Functional Design Document!

Hakin9 obviously f-ed up...

but I still like reading it. I understand not wanting to be spammed left and right, but hell this is the same community that says we need to be sharing more. I guess I'll have to read that one in full since I havn''t yet.

Hakin9 - Spam Kings

As the nmap guys were writing their article I was also writing my own about how I've been being spammed by the Hakin9 team for the past 3 years.

www.digininja.org/blog/hakin9_spam_kings.php

To the message above this, it isn't about the sharing it is about the constant nagging to write articles. I write articles which I publish for free on my own site, I am not interested in writing for Hakin9 and have been telling them for the last 3 years but they just won't listen.

So Hakin9 is a high tech version of the Huffington Post? Good to know.

This is Brilliant!

Unlike other authors, we have decided not to enable time since 1967;

Emulation of Semaphores

Brilliant