back to article Ig Nobels 2012: Physics of ponytails, chimp arse-cognition and more

The butt-loving tendencies of chimpanzees have won this year's Anatomical Ig Nobel for researchers who found that monkeys can recognise each other from pictures of each other's arses. Frans de Waal of The Netherlands and US boffin Jennifer Pokorny came along to the ceremony to lift their prize for their paper on chimps' sex …

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  1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Pint

    Proud!!

    I am proud the Dutch managed to get another two IgNobels!

    Here's to research that makes you think and laugh (I am not picky about the order)

    1. Thomas 4
      Thumb Up

      Re: Proud!!

      Isn't science fantastic?

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      Re: Proud!!

      As a proud owner of a ponytail, I'm happy to hear that it's finally getting the attention and recognition it deserves among the science community.

      1. Ejit

        Re: Proud!!

        "Ah jeez you cut the pony-tail. Sell out"

  2. AdamT
    Boffin

    I like these!

    I like that fact that they have perfectly pitched the "yes researchers, it's real science but, hey, even you have to admit, it's pretty odd/funny/weird" attitude. And I think that comes across (mostly) to the general public - who might laugh but then think "hmm, actually, that is a kind of useful thing to know" - and also to the researchers who (mostly) turn up and accept the awards with good humour.

    It is part of the true spirit of boffinry!

    1. Arctic fox
      Happy

      Re: "...actually, that is a kind of useful thing to know" I am absolutely certain that monkeys.....

      ..........consider that this:

      "....can recognise each other from pictures of each other's arses."

      .......is of the first importance. Maybe there should be an app for that instead of face recognition!

      1. MrT

        Soon to be added to...

        ... Google Goggles, linking arse to contacts, locations, hobbies etc. If no match is possible, Goggles will show images of similar arses as an alternative. Must remember to not mix up Nicki Minaj with Kenny Everett's Rod Stewart sketch...

        Later to be followed by a feature to recognize the back of someone's head; "GoogleBoH: because Google never forgets the back of someone's head"...

        1. Arctic fox
          Happy

          Please Mr T, enough already!

          :)

          AF

          1. AdamT
            Facepalm

            Re: Please Mr T, enough already!

            AF: So, I like Boffins! Sue Me! We don't have enough of them or the things they do so I take every opportunity ...

            Ah, wait, I'm doing it again aren't I ? :-)

      2. disgruntled yank

        Re: "...actually, that is a kind of useful thing to know" I am absolutely certain that monkeys.....

        Before or after an uninstructed colonoscopist has exploded it?

      3. Jedit Silver badge
        Joke

        "Maybe there should be an app for that instead of face recognition!"

        The iOS version only works with the forward facing camera?

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One of these was already invented

    "Acoustics Prize: Kazutaka Kurihara and Koji Tsukada [JAPAN] for creating the SpeechJammer — a machine that disrupts a person's speech, by making them hear their own spoken words at a very slight delay."

    My cell provider has one of these that they, apparently, turn on randomly during my calls. Our conference line provider has one too...

    /sarc

    1. AdamT

      Re: One of these was already invented

      To be honest I'm a bit surprised about the Fluid Dynamics one too. I'd have thought research on sloshing in fuel tanks etc. would have covered that sort of thing?

      1. John Smith 19 Gold badge

        Re: One of these was already invented

        True. It's a recurring theme of both launch vehicle tanks and propellant tanks in spinning satellites.

        *However* this is usually a concern when the tank is emptying, say 25% full and below, and the tanks have a top on.

        Beverage cup sloshing is more likely to be a problem with a nearly full tank (cup) which can have a wide range of depth to diameter ratios, possibly bringing in effects of the shape of the base of the inside of the cup.

        Yes I probably need to get out more. ....

    2. EddieD

      Re: One of these was already invented

      We used to use this as a demonstration of psychoacoustics on our open days - ours needed headphones though, so I suppose there's something new here...possibly

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_auditory_feedback

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: One of these was already invented

        I experienced it in about 1972. A friend from the BBC had a very smart portable tape machine that incorporated variable delayed monitoring.

      2. William Towle

        Re: One of these was already invented

        > http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_auditory_feedback

        QI demonstrated this recently, which was particularly good viewing.

        Stephen Fry was busy explaining the principle while they primed Alan Davies with a challenge to read something out ... only he wasn't fazed at all. Different panellists were affected by varying degrees.

    3. Kubla Cant

      Re: One of these was already invented

      First time I came across this it was a demonstration of the problem of echo on transatlantic phone lines. That must have been about 40 years ago.

    4. Len Goddard
      Stop

      Re: One of these was already invented

      I encountered a machine to do this in an interactive science museum in the Netherlands about 45 years ago. At that stage I already knew about the effect as I had seen it on Tomorrow's World some years previously.

      Do you get extra Ig-ness for plagarism?

      1. Stoneshop
        FAIL

        Re: One of these was already invented

        an interactive science museum in the Netherlands

        The Evoluon, which has been transformed into a fucking conference center.

        Science isn't attractive anymore.

        1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
          Unhappy

          Re: One of these was already invented

          That's a shame, I remember the BBC trade test film about Evoluon. It's still on YouTube somewhere, I think.

    5. JL1155
      Boffin

      Re: One of these was already invented

      There is a mention (p. 48) in Peter Wright's book 'Spycatcher' about use of a tape recorder with two heads to give listeners a slight delay in one ear for the purpose of *improving* voice intelligibility when transcribing tapes.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: One of these was already invented

        Good point JL115. The more common uses for DAF are for beneficial purposes - like helping people who have problems with stuttering.

        The wrong (or right depending on your intent) delay inducing stress on the speaker is also a well established observation.

        I guess, the more I think about it, the more I'm surprised it has taken this long to be weaponized for malicious use. Makes me wonder what other types of "glitches" could be misused like this...

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    acoustics prize

    This is one I could really use sometimes

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: acoustics prize

      Having had this happen many times on various calls by some weird fluke of connection, I can assure you it makes it damn near impossible to get out more than a few words at a time. It's extremely frustrating.

      The more I think about it... there could be an App for that. It could have a little STFU button that you could turn on to do a delayed playback onto whatever call you're on whenever your "victim" is talking. Oh wow... that's BOFH territory.

      1. Kubla Cant
        Thumb Up

        Re: acoustics prize

        That's actually a brilliant idea. Much better than call screening. Just turn the echo on whenever you receive an unwanted call, and see how long they last.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: acoustics prize

          Oh yes! An app called cold caller?

          I'd love to hear them stuttering to a halt over that hugely insincere opening, "Am I speaking to Mr G? Hello Thad, how are you today?"

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: acoustics prize

            As a Telefonica customer, I have to say that eventually you can train yourself to talk over echoes.

      2. Fibbles

        Re: acoustics prize

        "The more I think about it... there could be an App for that."

        Turn up the volume of the speaker on your handset. If it's loud enough the microphone should pick it up and the latency of the telephone network will introduce a delay.

    2. Neil Barnes Silver badge
      Boffin

      Re: acoustics prize

      Back when I were but a wee lad working in BBC News as a technical assistant, we used to audition newsreaders from time to time, and one of the tests was to see how long they lasted before tripping up over their own tongue when we replayed the output of just recorded tape (the difference between the record and replay head was perhaps half an inch - a fifteenth of a second at 7.5ips).

      As I recall, only the likes of Richard Baker and Kenneth Kendall could survive this assault on the senses...

      1. Pedigree-Pete
        Thumb Up

        Re: acoustics prize

        Apparently, Alan Davis is pretty good at it too. (See QI).

  5. Crisp
    Coffee/keyboard

    Medicine Prize

    I wouldn't have thought that the chances of patients exploding were that high during colonoscopies.

    Now a colonic irrigation, I can see that having explosive consequences.

    1. David Neil
      Mushroom

      Re: Medicine Prize

      Sometimes they use CO2 to help inflate the bowel so they can peer into all the nooks and crannies.

      It's as uncomfortable as it sounds...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Medicine Prize

        Not sure this deserves an Ignoble...were I a colonoscopy patient, I would look at not exploding very favourably.

      2. Arthur Jackson
        Mushroom

        Re: Medicine Prize

        You bastard! I am going in for a Gastroscopy/Colonoscopy next week. I had managed to put it to the back of my mind... until now.

        Mind you, I am going to insist that they run the probe under the tap before they shove it down my throat.

    2. Stoneshop

      Re: Medicine Prize

      'Ooooh, Mrs Niggerbaiter's exploded!'

      'Good thing too.'

      'Aww, she was my best friend!'

      'Oh, Mother, don't be so sentimental. Things explode every day.'

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The salmon's not dead

    he's resting

    1. Mike 68

      Re: The salmon's not dead

      I actually think this one's fairly useful. Shows up the problem of false positives

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: The salmon's not dead

        Yes, like brain activity in some politicians...

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Yes, like brain activity in some politicians...

          Doesn't that presuppose a brain?

          1. Stoneshop
            Holmes

            Re: Yes, like brain activity in some politicians...

            Politicians? They're very skilled in faking and pretending. If necessary, they'll pretend they have a brain.

            1. Esskay
              Joke

              Re: Yes, like brain activity in some politicians...

              Neuroscience Prize: Craig Bennett, Abigail Baird, Michael Miller, and George Wolford [USA], for demonstrating that brain researchers, by using complicated instruments and simple statistics, can see meaningful brain activity anywhere — even in a dead salmon.

              I'm Pretty sure Scientologists discovered an instrument for doing this years ago.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Literature Prize...

    Literature Prize: The US Government General Accountability Office, for issuing a report about reports about reports that recommends the preparation of a report about the report about reports about reports.

    I dont get it. With my usual govt. clients, it's everyday work for many departments. Maybe I should send their candidature for next year.

    (got to love Kanuckistan)

    Anon, of course... still need work...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Literature Prize...

      Kanuckistan?

      ...and all the years I thought your country was named Canadia.

      : /

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sir ChimpsALot

    Quoth the chimps:

    I like big butts and I cannot lie!

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Used to work with a 'speech jammer'

    While on a placement for the MoD my line manager was a lady who obviously had some sort of (I'm struggling for terminology here) thing whereby when you spoke to her, she voiced back to you every single word of what you said in a kind of mumble about half a second after you started speaking. She was quite intelligent (IT bod) but it made reporting anything to her almost impossible because when she started mumbling you thought she was interrupting you and so you stopped to listen. Then she stopped. So you started again, and then she started again. etc You just had to sort of grit your. teeth and keep going until you had finished. Essentially you had to break a normal social etiquette of allowing somebody else to speak on a continual basis. Quite wearing.

  10. theastrodragon
    Pint

    No Beer

    Why did none of this years IgNobles include beer??

    1. Anonymous Custard
      Coat

      Re: No Beer

      You're mixing them up with the Darwin Awards ;)

      Although the fluid dynamics one would have potential there.

  11. Ironclad
    Holmes

    Had to know about the green hair

    Apparently the hot water stripped copper from the pipes in new houses:

    http://www.thelocal.se/37994/20111217/

    1. Badvok
      WTF?

      Re: Had to know about the green hair

      Like you I too just had to look it up but I just don't get it. Here in the UK we've used copper for piping and storing hot water for decades but I've never heard of this effect before.

      1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: Had to know about the green hair

        Here in the UK we've used copper for piping and storing hot water for decades but I've never heard of this effect before.

        Ditto the 'States, though around here you're lucky if your house doesn't get broken into while you're out and your copper pipes stolen for scrap. (My painter/plasterer wanted to do a faux copper finish on my gutters, and I vetoed it on the grounds that some idiot would steal them, thinking they were real copper gutters.)

        I haven't looked into this study, but my guess is that trace contaminants in the water played a role. Either it was sufficiently acidic to strip copper atoms from the interior of the pipe, or there were similar ionic reactions, or something along those lines. Perhaps if there are enough metallic ions in the water the pipes could lose a significant amount of copper to galvanic corrosion? (I admit my high-school chemistry has faded.)

        Copper ions are water-soluble, and you always get some dissolved copper in water that flows across copper surfaces - that's why copper roofing strips suppress fungal growth on the rest of the roof, for example.

  12. Martin Maloney
    Coat

    Although they were all hilarious...

    ...the prize in medicine nearly made me, er, bust a gut!

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bahahahaha

    Well earned methinks. "chimp's arse ID " indeed. LOL!

    I'd have nominated Obama for the Ig Nobel Peace prize, for failing to get rid of nuclear weapons as he originally promised wayback when.

    Apologies to any 'merkins on here, but isn't the Nobel awarded for actual results, not promising to do something then failing to carry it out?

    AC/DC 21/21/2012

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Also

    Can *humans* recognise a picture of their partner's arse amongst similar ones?

    If not then that implies we are in fact less intelligent than a chimpanzee at least in that uhm, area.

    AC/DC because he has seen some pretty nasty stuff on the Net :-(

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Department of homeland security to use chimps to identify the green rectal pubes of al qaeda trained monkeys infiltrating our hospitals after eating 10 tins of baked beans

  16. Steven Roper
    Thumb Up

    The ponytail research

    is actually quite useful from a 3d modelling perspective.

    As one of my hobbies is the use of 3D modelling software (notably DAZ Studio and Cinema 4D) to model and create *ahem* erotic imagery, making my virtual temptresses look and move as realistically as possible is paramount. A couple of my "girls" have ponytails, which will no doubt benefit from these Ig Nobel winners' good work!

  17. Jonski
    Coat

    Anatomical Ig Nobel

    I sincerely hope the images presented to the chimps weren't in Smell-o-vision.

  18. Jonathan Richards 1
    Boffin

    I cannot believe that I am the first to say...

    ...chimpanzees are NOT MONKEYS. Jeez, you'd have thought that the Librarian would have got through to everyone by now.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      Re: I cannot believe that I am the first to say...

      Whilst possibly true, it's also probable that some people don't give a monkey's arse.

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