back to article Apple confirms 'surprise' September 12 event

Confirming what pomaceous-minded cognoscenti have been claiming for months, Apple has sent out press invites to a special event in San Francisco on September 12, which looks in all likelihood to be the announcement for the long-anticipated iPhone 5. The announcement begins with the words "It's almost here," followed by a large …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    iPad mini iPhone 5 yeeeeeeees.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      iPad mini iPhone 5 noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      1. LarsG
        Meh

        I hope

        The iPhone 5 doesn't look like the Samsung S3

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: I hope

          "I hope

          The iPhone 5 doesn't look like the Samsung S3"

          Have you not seen the leaked pics? looks as bland as its intended user base.

          idiotPhone is so over, they can't even get the numbering right.

        2. Mark .

          Re: I hope

          If the 4" rumours are true, it'll look like a 2 year old Samsung Galaxy S. The specs may even be as good as lasts year's Samsung Galaxy S2.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        ipod mini phone 5

        ipad mini phone 5 zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

        1. Mark .

          Re: ipod mini phone 5

          Indeed - it's a bit depressing when a company has to try to stoke up attention with "announcement of an announcement". We've heard the media harping on about Iphone 5 for over a year, and the Ipad Mini is just speculation. (Even if they are released, they already fit the classic definition of vaporware.) Perhaps the media should focus on actual product releases, with more attention to the leading platforms, rather than Apple Apple Apple all the time (at least the Register does cover the other mobile news, unlike most the mainstream media).

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: ipod mini phone 5

            Well, it would be pretty fucking pointless to schedule a public announcement and fail to invite anyone, wouldn't it?

      3. Ted Treen
        FAIL

        If you don't want one - don't buy one. Then you'll be free to get a life.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          @Ted Treen

          most of us would like to just buy what we like, and leave what we don't...

          the problem is Apple constantly suing the competition.... It makes us hate Apple...

          Now I know its really the Patent offices fault for granting stupid patents, but Apple shouldn't be using patents to stifle competition.

        2. Lallabalalla
          Unhappy

          If you don't want one - don't buy one. Then you'll be free to get a life.

          Killjoy.

    2. RICHTO
      Mushroom

      Mac OS-X AntiVirus V1.0?

      http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/typepad/alleyinsider/silicon_alley_insider/~3/lAqDYm8MT3A/report-on-cybercrime-finds-increase-attacks-on-apples-2012-9

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      When released it will give the fandroids a reason for living again...... Without controversy they shrivel and wither.

      It will also be a great time to bury bad news, that most Android phones will not get the JB updates.

      A great day September 12 2012.

    4. Eddy Ito

      iPad mini == iPhone 5

  2. Annihilator
    Happy

    Persona non grata?

    I can only assume there's no point asking whether the press invites extended as far as Vulture Towers?

    1. Ted Treen
      Holmes

      Re: Persona non grata?

      Based on the form of recent months, that would be akin to inviting the Beano editor to Prime Minister's Question Time...

      Awaits hordes of inevitable downvotes

  3. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Trollface

    9/11, just one day later?

    Clearly, another War on Stuff is in the offing.

    What or Who could "Stuff" be.... hmmm....

  4. tony
    Joke

    I'm looking forward to Samsungs on the 13th...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      No, Samsung will sue on the 13th, the iphone 5 will be LTE, Samsung will swoop in to try to ban it before its released.

      But if I was Samsung, I would have an amazing product sitting up my sleeve ready to launch the day AFTER the iPhone 5 is announced

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Samsung already have a number of amazing products out there and available to buy, any of which blow Apple's tired old efforts out of the water. That's why Apple have to resort to litigation to have their "competition" stifled. Haven't you been paying attention?

      2. Philip Lewis

        Has it occured

        ... to anyone, exactly how Samsung knows so much about the unannounced and unreleased product that it already has its suit at the briefs ready to file?

        I suspect this is the Samsung's round 2 of "try and fuck apple by fucking with FRAND". If so, I suspect it will fail like round 1.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Apple is better at keeping secrets than Washington.

    1. Steve Evans

      Sorry?

      You don't honestly think the rumour mill is fuelling itself do you?

      Bring on September 13th... A day with zero iPhone rumours... From the 14th it'll be downhill all the way to the next (cr)Apple event.

      1. PsychicMonkey
        Devil

        no iPhone rumours?

        September 13th is when they start releasing iPhone 6 rumours....

        1. Steve Evans

          Re: no iPhone rumours?

          If they feel the need to do that within 24 hours of announcing the iPhone5 then it's tantamount to admitting the iPhone5 is a stop-gap you shouldn't bother buying...

          They couldn't do that two years running could they?

          Or maybe they'll announce Siri actually working outside the US of A?

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Mushroom

    It's nearly here ...

    Obviously they're talking about the granting of their patent on the use of numbers.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    iMacs...

    There have been recent reports of shortages of 27" iMacs, which seem long overdue for a refresh. Hopefully this event will introduce that refresh since I definitely want to buy one. Maybe it will be a minor refresh and they can just mention it in passing before moving on to the new iPhone, or maybe it will be minor enough that they can just change the specs on the web site. Either way I hope the wait will be over soon.

  8. This post has been deleted by its author

  9. Hooksie

    Cue another Jawdroppingly underwhelming device that looks exactly the same as every other iPhone since the first one. But a wee bit bigger. The fanbois will be rabid trying to justify why it's a quantum leap forward.

    1. ThomH

      Can you provide any examples?

      Usually what happens is Apple alleges to have revolutionised something by including it on the phone despite it hardly being a new idea. FaceTime is a good example. Basically nobody said 'that's amazing, Apple has invented video chat!' but quite a few people said 'it'll be interesting to try', which basically means they're reserving judgment to anyone not addled with confirmation bias.

      Presumably you'll be happier with the usual 'OMG! All Apple have done is made the processor faster and improved the display! This is a rip off of the IBM XT!' crowd?

      Here's a spoiler: there are no new ideas in phones. The iPhone 5 isn't going to contain any new ideas. All the relevant numbers will be a little higher and that's it. The same goes for every other phone that'll be released this year or for the foreseeable future.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Unless they add an anal vibrator!

        1. Armando 123

          Uh ...

          "Unless they add an anal vibrator!"

          AT&T already invented that with their texting rates.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          "Unless they add an anal vibrator!" for its intended user base.

        3. EddieD

          Seen floating round the internet...

          My gold plated butt-plug business is being sued by Apple.

          Apparently they have a patent for overpriced crap for arseholes.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        >All Apple have done is made the processor faster and improved the display!

        Technically its Samsung that has made the processor faster and Sharp who have improved the display.....

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          "Technically its Samsung that has made the processor faster and Sharp who have improved the display....."

          Exactley! Apple have done NOTHING.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            @Obviously!

            Just like Dell, and HP and ...

      3. Philip Lewis
        FAIL

        @ThomH

        There are many ways to implement new technology in a smartphone that do not include the communications chip or the cpu. Expect quite a bit of new tech in the next iPhone not cpu/comms related. I expect new tech in the Galaxy IV too.

        Samsung are not the chip designer either, they are do fabrication and the phone comms chip will be from Qualcom or similar.

        And a history lesson for you: Listen up. A famous car manufacturer once released a new model and claimed in their marketing "the end of development" of automobiles, because everything had now been invented. That was 90+ years ago.

        Idiot statements like "no new ideas in phones" reflect the feeble mind of the fucking moron who made it.

        1. ThomH

          @Phillip Lewis

          That's some good ad hominem. Imagine I put some swear words here if it helps bring things down to your level of conversation.

          I said there are no new ideas in phones and nothing foreseeable coming. I'm also willing to say that there are no people on the street outside my window and none foreseeably coming. Things can plateau.

      4. Mark .

        Well that's it - Apple claims to revolutionise something, and even though it's just as you say in reality, the media and Apple fans also claim it to be revolutionary.

        It's true that fans didn't decide to pick on video calling, but they do so with many other examples (3G, apps, Internet, the whole idea of smartphones). And in general, given the huge media hype over Iphone 4, if "Facetime" was the flagship feature advertised by Apple, then that's rather telling.

        You're right, each new release is no different to any other phone released. We just wish the media would treat it that way too.

      5. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        "Basically nobody said 'that's amazing, Apple has invented video chat!' "

        You're having a laugh, right?

        All the iPhonists I know refused to believe that 3G video calling existed before the arrival of Facetime.

        "Why has your ancient Sony Ericsson non-smart phone got a front facing camera.....?"

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Facepalm

      Rabies

      "...The fanbois will be rabid trying to justify why it's a quantum leap forward..."

      Really? Most of the rabid behaviour I see on El Reg seems to be from Android users, dutifully responding like Pavlov's dogs, every time the Apple bell is rung.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    As far as I'm concerned,

    you can take your iPhone 5 Nano, and stick it in your ear!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      Re: As far as I'm concerned,

      iBabelfish?

  11. BozNZ

    iLitigate

  12. Flashy Red
    Facepalm

    Ooh!

    Is it... another patent litigation case?

    Fix Mountain Loin you fruity f***ers.

    1. Franklin
      Devil

      Re: Ooh!

      I wasn't aware mountains had loins. 'Tis all good, though, your kink is OK...

  13. Mitoo Bobsworth

    Hmmm...

    More consumer tech that I don't need - Pass.

    1. Ted Treen
      Facepalm

      Re: Hmmm...

      Far too clever to look at consumer tech are we?

      Jeez, I wish I could be as cool...

      1. Mitoo Bobsworth
        Happy

        Re: Hmmm...

        @ Ted Treen - clever & cool have nothing to do with it. I have what I need to do what I want at the price I want to pay - simple as that.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Hmmm...

          Then why waste your time commenting about it?

  14. Joerg
    Stop

    There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

    So just don't expect an iPad Mini either now or October... and so far not even when iPad 4 will be released.

    My sources confirmed that there is none planned.

    And that is a very good thing.

    It would be Tim Cook 2nd terrible mistake after having put Apple at risk giving money to its shareholders, something Steve Jobs never wanted to do because then investors might start to bring any Company/Corporation down too easily.

    Apple doesn't need any iPad Mini. Android 7" tablets along with bigger Android tablets and upcoming Microsoft MetroUI/ModernUI ugly childish interface won't go far beyond 20-25% of marketshare at best.

    Apple has nothing to worry about. The demand for 7" tablets is almost none.

    Why putting the sales of normal sized iPad models at risk to release an iPad Mini 7" that would cannibalize sales of the full iPad just because it would be cheaper?

    As long as iPad is in the 50-80% marketshare range Apple just doesn't need any iPad Mini for sure.

    1. Mark Wilson
      Trollface

      Nobody wants 7" tablets?

      Really? Both the Kindle Fire & Nexus 7 appear to have pretty good sales figures.

      1. Giles Jones Gold badge

        Re: Nobody wants 7" tablets?

        That's because they're cheap.

        People don't go out of their way to own a small Kia car, but they'll buy one if that's all they can afford.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Nobody wants 7" tablets?

          > That's because they're cheap.

          >

          > People don't go out of their way to own a small Kia car, but they'll buy one if that's all they can afford.

          1) You are wrong

          2) You are a snob

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Nobody wants 7" tablets?

        I want 2 x 7" tablets for my sons, but they are usually either overpriced or under speced.

        the Google nexus 7 is the only one close, and they skipped the sd slot!

    2. Magnus Ramage

      Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

      Hmmm. And the Sept 13th update: hey! the iPad mini is here! It's going to change everything!

      Seriously: it's clear that 7" tablets aren't dominating the market, but equally clear they're on the rise. Will Apple want a piece of that? Who knows. We'll find out.

    3. ThomH

      Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

      Apple tends to chase newly emerging markets, such as MP3 players or web-enabled phones, rather than inventing new categories.

      I'd therefore argue that the 7" tablet market's small share at present makes it a target Apple would chase, though it'll be more of a 5% Mac-style share than a 25% iPhone-style or 75% iPod-style share if a product doesn't become available soon.

      1. Goat Jam

        Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

        "I'd therefore argue that the 7" tablet market's small share at present makes it a target Apple would chase"

        Steve Jobs is known to have tried prototypes smaller than 10" (not sure if 7 inch specifically was tested though).

        He decided that the sub 10" form factor was too small to properly navigate and display normal web pages while still maintaining an acceptable user experience.

        Now he is dead apple are (rumoured) to be do exactly what he had said he would never do.

        This move could show Tim Cook to be the new visionary at apple moving the company forward or it could be an embarrassing failure and vindicate Jobs earlier assesment thereby placing Jobs absence from apple in stark relief in the minds of punters and industry naval gazers alike.

        Time will tell who is right I suppose. It's going to be interesting watching it play out that's for sure.

        1. D@v3
          WTF?

          Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

          my issue with the

          "He decided that the sub 10" form factor was too small to properly navigate and display normal web pages while still maintaining an acceptable user experience"

          idea, is that, if that is the case, what's the deal with the iPhone? That's much less than 10" and seems to be able to navigate fairly well, and gives a good user experience.

          1. Philip Lewis
            Paris Hilton

            Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

            The iPhone form factor is so the whole of the screen face can be reached by the thumb while holding it in one hand. Try it ... once you get much larger, more and more people cannot accomplish this task.

        2. Mark .

          Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

          "He decided that the sub 10" form factor was too small to properly navigate and display normal web pages while still maintaining an acceptable user experience."

          Whilst expecting people to do the same on a teeny 3.5" screen...

          And given the number of website-wrapper "apps" companies now have to produce for Ipads, it suggests that the same issue applies to Ipads. Given that 10" laptops don't have special "apps" for them, it suggests the problem that Jobs found with IOS and web browsing isn't anything to do with how big the screen is.

    4. vic 4
      FAIL

      Re: The demand for 7" tablets is almost none.

      Hmm, just delivered a very significant number to a client. A perfect form factor for them and plenty of others.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

      It would be Tim Cook 2nd terrible mistake after having put Apple at risk giving money to its shareholders, something Steve Jobs never wanted to do because then investors might start to bring any Company/Corporation down too easily.

      ----

      Steve Jobs wasn't against giving money back to shareholders. After all, what is Apple going to do with it, save it in the bank until they someday say "we're out of ideas, we're liquidating and giving shareholders their share"? He just didn't like the idea of committing to dividends or share buybacks that would compromise the financial stability of a company. Given that Apple was paying a dividend when it came near to running out of money around the time he returned, it's not an unreasonable position.

      But with over $100 billion in the bank it's beyond silly to hold on it when even if everyone in the world stopped buying Apple products at once they'd have enough money to pay their employees and keep operating as if nothing had changed for many years.

      The emails at the Samsung trial proved that even Jobs' mind had been changed about the 7" tablets. There are several claims of Apple ordering large quantities of 7.85" displays that lead one to believe Apple is doing a smaller iPad (though they may call it "iPod video" or something, who knows) I doubt they'd announce it next week since they want the spotlight on iPhone 5, but maybe next month when the iPhone 5 hype is tapering off a bit and people start thinking about their Christmas lists a $299 7" iPad would be a nice addition to Apple's product line, whatever they call it.

      But no, we're supposed to believe the ravings of a random guy posting to The Reg that HE knows the real story better than all the guys who actually have connections to the companies making and assembling components. Forgive me if I don't discount the rumors being reported from multiple sources because YOU say they're all wrong.

      1. Goat Jam
        Pint

        Re: There is no iPad Mini being mass produced right now.

        "The emails at the Samsung trial proved that even Jobs' mind had been changed about the 7" tablets"

        I didn't know about that, thanks.

        Do you have any references?

  15. mrweekender
    Mushroom

    Ohhhh...

    ...the haters are out in force. Personally I like my iPhone, it does the job. I hope there's some good updates for iOS and some innovative (rather than incremental) refresh designs for the iMacs and the iPhone.

    Copyomatic 2000 on standby Samsung et al...

    1. Mick F

      Re: Ohhhh...

      not haters, just grown beyond dependance of that shitty brand.

      Skeletor would have been proud of your blind obedience.

      1. Lallabalalla
        FAIL

        Re: Ohhhh...

        Because clearly you would only call a brand "shitty" if you didn't hate it.

        Er.....

    2. Select * From Handle
      FAIL

      Re: Ohhhh...

      " I hope there's some good updates for iOS and some innovative (rather than incremental) refresh designs for the iMacs and the iPhone."

      LOL!

      You mean like

      1. Sending multiple picture to multiple contacts at the same time?

      2. Send to voicemail reply with message like "im driving"?

      3. A personal assistant that actually works?

      Yeah Samsung already has these features....

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Ohhhh...

      Innovative?

      Pray tell what were these innovations? I own both and iPad and MacBook Air, and I see no innovations?

  16. nuked
    Trollface

    What is an Apple?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Is it that yellow fruit that you unzip and eat the white bits?

    2. 404

      Apple: An opiate of the people, which when consumed, carries a worm that subtly conceals a very shiny hook, called "iTunes" ... the addict is forever enthralled by newer and better shinys, always gladly sending tribute to the Western Hemisphere, that Holy Land called Cupertino...

      ;)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @404

        >forever enthralled by newer and better shinys

        Life is short, so... what more could you possibly want? Or are you just bitter that not everyone else is as bitter?

        1. 404
          Childcatcher

          Re: @404

          >"Life is short, so... what more could you possibly want?"

          Would rather leave a legacy of good deeds and accomplishments than a trail of broken/dead-by-design iThings.

          Saw a double rainbow, coming home from a 14 hour day. Made me smile.

  17. Peter Johnstone

    Apple TV?

    What ever happened to the rumoured TV from apple?

    1. tommy060289

      Re: Apple TV?

      the iPad mini is the new apple TV, ie the rumoured device that never amounts to anything.

      I wish they'd drop both those stupid rumours as they are just column fillers!

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    We know what iOS6 has and the hardware will just be another hardware improvement bump. So this event will be a real boring yawn fest.

    All of the real innovation is in the software these days and iOS6 adds bugger all except a few tweaks.

    Looking forward more to the WP8 announcement tomorrow.

  19. despicable me
    Trollface

    Hmm...

    By sheer coincidence that's the very date I have scheduled to announce my patent for "the use of integers between four and six in the naming context of handheld mobile devices".

  20. Haku

    Note to self:

    Avoid all tech news websites on Sept 12th.

    And probably the 13th and 14th for good measure.

  21. 6 inches long, handle.
    Trollface

    So, finally an invitation from the fruit to a vulture?

    No mention this time on how The Reg is an outcast from the shiny event!?! I hear the Reg staff doing an elves dance in the office :)

  22. taxman
    Flame

    It's......

    going to be a bit of a rant. Please excuse me, but this has been building up for a while and my medication hasn't come through yet.

    It's a phone for fucks sake. It's not a cure for a disabling or fatal disease. It's not an invention that will change the life style for future generations like the internal combustion engine or jet engine or electron microscope........get the drift.

    Its a fucking phone!

    Jeez! How many bloody morons are there on this god forsaken planet that think a lump of metal, plastic and glass is worth getting so bleedin worked up about. What are you? Human or fucking brainless moronic sheep?

    Sorry about that. Not my usual sort of posting but I feel better for saying it.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: It's......

      Reading between the lines here are you saying I shouldn't queue for one then?

      1. taxman
        Angel

        Re: It's......

        Well, unless you do not already have a phone and there is a vital need for you to have one e.g. you need to contact someone who can save the world from extinction, I'd suggest possibly not. Even then it would probably be too late due to the length of the queue.

        Consider. How will your life be changed for the better or enhanced by spending time in a queue achieving nothing while waiting to obtain one of these new phones? What could you achieve with your life using those hours on other things and then days, weeks, months later just going into a store when there is no queue? What would having one of these devices allow you to do that would change your life forever for the better?

        Or do you, as sheep, follow the leader because they must know something - rather than think for yourself?

        1. tony
          Happy

          Re: It's......

          I think people who queue for crap* like this do it for a social experience not just to get whatever item there queuing for.

          I remember queuing outside a midnight opening, with a bunch of like minded people, to buy Aliens wide screen directors cut on VHS a few years back. It was a laugh. Don't think I could have managed more than the 45 odd minutes wait though between pub closing and shop opening possibly due to attention span and bladder control.

          *crap, any mass consumer item.

    2. Badvok
      Mushroom

      Re: It's......

      What's more moronic, getting worked up over a phone, or getting worked up about other people getting worked up over a phone?

  23. Dropper

    Sadbois

    Which is sadder... fanbois waiting for the iPhone 5 or WoWbois waiting for Mists of Pandara?

    Do I admit to being in the latter category? oh well..

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fact

    This is fact not fiction Apple are going to let any one upgrade for free if they take in there old iphone. The new Iphone will go on sale in the uk at just £120 we have already have info into the mobile phone store where i work

    1. djswivel

      Re: Fact

      Of course you already have the info.

      Same as everyone else who believes nonsense does.

      They just type iPhone 5 rumours in to Google and believe everything they read in the results.

      Apple let people upgrade for free? Yeah, next up it'll be "bring in your Macbook G4 and we'll give you a Macbook Pro 15".

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Fact

      That will be £120 on a £45/month contract I assume, vs my SGS3 for free on a £36/month contract.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Fact

        Yes but you have a crappy quality Samsung. The Ford Mondeo of the phone world. The iPhone is the Mercedes-Benz.

        1. BorkedAgain
          Happy

          Re: Fact - @ AC 19:45

          Bless.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    I remember well

    the latest time everyone on the internet reported about the iPhone 5 event, and then all came away looking like total retards when it turned out to be the "iPhone4 with working aerial" launch announcement.,

    Seems nobody learnt anything from last time.

    http://www.reghardware.com/2011/04/20/iphone_5_out_september/

    1. Goat Jam

      Re: I remember well

      Well, to be fair, the graphic on the anouncement has a great big 5 on it this time, which wasn't the case last year.

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Excellent...

    Can look forward to loads of people dumping their iPhone 4 and 4S on eBay and the likes so may pick up a cheap bargain.....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Excellent...

      Same way I picked up an iPad2 64GB/3G/WiFi hardly used at all for quite a bit off cost. Bargains always abound when a popular device passes a model upgrade. iPad/iPhone/iPod no different. I am sure the are Galaxy fondlers that sold the GII and bought a GIII the moment it arrived.

      This is not an Apple gadget phenomenon. It applies in every product category.

      So in other news ... bears shit in the woods, doh!

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    With a special new app called 1-800-iSue

    Which will automatically detect any Samsung phone nearby and will contact Apple's lawyers.

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    i...

    iDon'tGiveAShit.

    5.

    Posted from my HTC (black with rounded corners, natch).

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Psion 4

    Back in the 90s, it was believed the reason Psion went from the Series 3 to the Series 5 was because the number 4 is considered unlucky in the far east. What was going to be the Series 4 was renamed to Sienna, before continuing the series with '5'.

    So out of interest, did Apple still use "iPhone 4" in regions where 4 is an unlucky number?

    1. Simon Harris

      Re: Psion 4

      I heard one story (I think from a review article in Personal Computer World) that the Sage IV (an early 1980s 68000 based system) followed on from the Sage II, skipping the Sage III because they'd seen that the Apple III was such a turkey, and it would be bad luck to have a version III.

      On the number '4', Minolta's entry-level SLR, the Dynax 4 (Maxxum 4 in the US), was renamed the Dynax 3 for the Asia/Pacific market.

    2. Robert Sneddon

      Four and the Far East

      The Japanese for four is "shi" which also means "death" (lots of operator overloading in Japanese, especially the single-syllable words...) so it's commonly replaced by "yon". Seven is "shichi", again with the death angle and it's often replaced by "nana". I don't know if the same sort of thing applies in modern Chinese.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Yet another iPhone

    Can't Apple think of an original product anymore instead of rehashing what is now an old design.

    They may change the size and the inner workings but it's still the same look.

    1. JDX Gold badge

      Re: Yet another iPhone

      If they did that everyone would be in uproar about how they 'ruined it'. See Windows8 threads.

      It's a small box with a screen, there's not a whole lot to change. If they add NFC and wireless charging that's a big deal though - we know Apple have the strength to make both things standard. Of course then everyone will think they invented both and that will make Reg posters very happy about having stuff to post about, but in the long term will improve stuff for the rest of us.

      1. Dave Clarke 5

        Re: Yet another iPhone

        @JDX - And then Apple will conveniently forget that the S3 had NFC and wireless charging before they did and sue Samsung anyway.

    2. Philip Lewis
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Yet another iPhone

      And you ask this question because you have seen it, right?

      Paris: At least I have seen her, really truly.

  31. Archibald Trumpetbeetle
    Happy

    Fictional exchange which may occur

    Pre iphone 5:

    Droidman: Look at my big S3/Onex/etc ...ooh look at the big screen

    Fanboi: Urgg it's too big, I don't need a phone that big

    Post iphone 5 release (assuming it's going to be bigger):

    Fanboi: Ooh wow the screen is so big, just what I needed !

    1. the-it-slayer
      Happy

      Re: Fictional exchange which may occur

      Hint: the screen will be probably be taller, not wider. no need for a second hand or stylus. we need phones that don't expect you to stretch the palm of your hand just to hold the damn thing.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Fictional exchange which may occur

        Some of us (i.e. MEN) have larger hands, and while I think the SGS3 is big for girls, for me it is perfect...

        I guess that means the iPhone is truly a Girl's phone and the Galaxy S a Man's phone... (physically)

        Personally I think Samsung needed to release a pretty 3.5" phone along side their 4.8", maybe next year they can...

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Samsung's favourite day...

    ...as their design team purposely starts designing the S4.

    "Let's get our corners even rwounder with a aluminium silver back and taller profile!" and scream with glee they've got the iPhone killer.

  33. We're all in it together

    With free engraving in the Apple store saying

    An S3 is for life, not just pulled before xmas

  34. Eddy Ito
    Black Helicopters

    My ouija board says

    In addition to "this changes everything, yet again" there will be a much more significant announcement that aims Cupertino's biggest boot squarely at Samsung's nuts. Apple will declare they have signed a deal with Qualcomm to jointly build / buy a chip fab. It will be in either Nevada to avoid California taxes while keeping it close or Malaysia to cut out the U.S. entirely and not worry about time zones. Expect to see Qualcomm stock rise on the news and Apple to remain fairly flat as the result of the impending cash outlay. Also watch for shares of Samsung & TSMC drop around 20%.

    Please note that I am fairly certain of this news that many will call a rumor as it has been confirmed by my magic 8 ball. The only question that remains is, will this bovine excrement news gain any traction in the press?

    Safe harbor, blah, blah forward looking statements, yadda, yadda, full disclosure, yadda, blah.

    1. James Hughes 1

      Re: My ouija board says

      Feasible I suppose, except for the bit about TSMC, who make chips for everybody, not just Apple and really wouldn't suffer an Apple departure.

  35. Haku

    If it is a new fone

    Will it come with a built in feature to stop people from recording footage in "tallscreen"?

  36. Grikath
    Meh

    alternatively...

    It's Election Day in the Netherlands. Results will be more far-reaching than whatever Fapple Toy is paraded on that day.

    Then again, one of the few brand-shops they have in this here country is just a few streets away, and amazingly not in the Hot Centre of town. Either they cannot pay the rent for prime property, or they have taken the place because it's one of the few places people can camp out without bothering innocent bystanders. ( and far away enough from the local MacDonalds to avoid the usual burger/wrapping barrage.)

    Underwhelmage happens.

    1. Tom 7

      Re: alternatively...

      Do you think Apple would sue MacD's if they left Apples queue for a burger queue?

  37. Mint Sauce
    Joke

    And now for something completely different.

    For some reason I'm reminded of Monty Python's Papperbok...

    "Coming soon, Page 71!"

    "only 15 pages to Page 71"

    etc.

    And the end result will be as magical and revolutionary no doubt.

  38. Silverburn
    Thumb Up

    "pomaceous-minded cognoscenti"

    Phrase of the week!

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Makes me giggle

    The Apple crowd here at work were going on about the 5 in the shadow up until I mentioned they were suffering from advertising and marketing.

    I have never seen a bunch of people look so sheepish :)

    And yes I am a fan droid and proud of it.

  40. Matt_payne666
    Coat

    The real meaning of the invite...

    12 and 5? how does this relate to a phone? on all invites Ive recieved, this would usually indicate the date being the 12th May

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Benchops

      Re: The real meaning of the invite...

      I don't think Ive needs an invite. He probably designed the thing.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: The real meaning of the invite...

      Does it really have to be said... 12th day and iPhone 5 perhaps? <slaps head>

      Or perhaps they want YOU to turn up on 12th May...

  41. Andrew James

    5

    1. New iPhone

    2. New iPod Touch / Nano

    3. Apple TV / iTV

    4. iMac update

    5. iPad Mini

    Five products. Rather than "iPhone 5" ... to me, this is not a completely unreasonable prospect, however obvious it seems that its just an iPhone launch. An iPad mini wouldnt need that much introduction, just "hey look, its an iPad, but smaller" ... same with the update to the iPod line. An iMac refresh likely wouldnt take much headline time either.

    1. Simon Harris
      Coat

      Re: 5

      I thought it was '5 peripherals' ...

      The average number of products with i-connectivity you'll have to replace because they're no longer compatible with the new iPhone.

  42. Mark .

    Save you the wait:

    My prediction:

    * 4" screen (as with Samsung phones around 2010).

    * Their own mapping software, so users no longer have to pay for satnav (Android and Nokia years ago).

    * Contrived useless statistic handpicked to make Apple's phone look best, with a fancy trademark (as with "PPI", "Retina").

    * Updated specs to rival the cutting edge of phone technology 18 months ago.

    * Apple logo will now light up, to make it an even more obvious Addidas-logos-everywhere-style advertisement for Apple.

  43. davemcwish
    Thumb Down

    Meh

    So it's another iphone, slightly better than the last one with just a bit more functionality that Stephen Fry and all his little fanboi friends and the press can drool over saying isn't it wonderful. So what will the 'revolutionary design' , (c) S Jobs, be ? The consensus is that it will have NFC, be slightly longer, 16:9 aspect ratio, and have a slightly faster processor. <scarcasm> Wow! noone else has a phone like this </scarcasm>

    What I'd like to know is when I can have one (Android or IOS) that's got a decent camera, maybe not quite as good as the Nokia 808 but hell it's my wish list so why not, a beefier and easily changable battery and a good GPS chip (SiRFstarV please) ?

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