back to article The best April 1 gags … or were they?

April 1 has come and gone for another year and as usual the technology industry got up to no good. It’s hard not to like Atlassian’s new product: IRKD. The app does for the real world what the company’s JIRA product does for the real world, namely let you list bugs and make them someone else’s problem. Sony slipped out the …

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  1. TrevorH
    Facepalm

    I see that this year even the government joined in the April fool's frenzy with their new monitor everything everywhere law.

    Oh, wait...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Anybody else suspect they timed that deliberately so people wouldn't be sure?

      Oh, and also http://doctorwhotv.co.uk/next-doctor-is-female-32205.htm

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      and still the biggest april fool is...

      ice cream sandwich......

      Where are you?

      1. Phil W
        Thumb Down

        Re: and still the biggest april fool is...

        Running on my Archos G9 tablet?

      2. Ilgaz

        Even funnier

        actually, it is very likely that when it finally ships to 98% one way or another, it will be outdated. Right, android 5 ships this summer or something.

        Google team should have used April 1 to disgrace the vendors still messing with their hacks. They could say "section 4.1 in agreement gives us rights to update 2.3 devices to 4.x. We are rolling out updates for all brands! They will run stock android"

        You can guess what would happen. Everyone would opt in.

      3. Mike Judge
        FAIL

        Re: and still the biggest april fool is...

        Running fine on my Asus Transformer, and just been approved for release on my Xperia Arc S.

        Thanks for asking.

        1. Ilgaz

          Even vista had better rate

          Running on 2% of total android devices. Your asus is also part of the 2%.

          It doesn't have backwards compatibility (even google have 2 youtube clients), it needs double of RAM without any explanation, optimized for a cpu which is still a luxury item for majority of install base.

          Want me to continue about why people joke about it?

          Media is forgiving since you don't want to mess with a gigantic advertising broker. If it was Nokia who dared to ship a symbian like that, you would see the circus.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Or that America now requires...

      ...to authorise British passengers boarding flights that don't even go to America or fly over it.

      Yes they can now say whether you are allowed to fly from Britain to another country!

      Apparently not an April Foll's Day gag!

      The Independent

  2. borkbork
    Thumb Up

    personally...

    I liked Notch's name for Mojang's new space game:

    http://marseffect.net/

    Especially funny given the 'scrolls' brouhaha.

    Had me going for a while, till I woke up enough to realise what day it was.

  3. scarshapedstar
    Happy

    Who cares

    I'm too busy reserving the Criterion Collection release of Kindergarten Cop!

    http://www.criterion.com/films/28373-kindergarten-cop

  4. Ralphe Neill

    One you missed ...

    Richard Stallman To Launch His Own Fashion Line ... it appeared all over the place but a good example can be found at:

    http://techlaze.com/2012/03/richard-stallman-to-launch-his-own-fashion-line/

    1. TRT Silver badge

      Re: One you missed ...

      And you missed Jessop's "Hover Pod" flying tripod.

      http://www.amateurphotographer.co.uk/news/Jessops_in_hover_tripod_April_Fools_prank_news_312061.html

  5. Andrew Moore

    I liked...

    AdBlock turning all the blocked frames into cat pictures.

    1. Lil Pete
      Thumb Up

      Re: I liked...

      I did wonder why my internet was suddenly covered in cats!

  6. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

    IRKD may be taking off

    Recent entries at IRKD (but amongst a lot of spam and random typing):

    IRKD-330 - Leaving dirty dishes on top of empty dishwasher

    IRKD-332 - Otherwise-attractive women with moustaches

    IRKD-334 - Your Cats

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Given notch's scrolls problem

    I'd of been tempted to announce a new Sim-style game that allows us to simulate social interactions and difficulties in relationships, and called it Fall-Out.

  8. Petrea Mitchell
    Trollface

    Responsibility claimed for 8-bit maps

    Reportedly, Square Enix is claiming the Google Maps change is due to Dragonlord Alefgard conquering it.

    http://www.animenewsnetwork.com/interest/2012-04-01/japan-anime-manga-game-creators-celebrate-april-fool-day

    1. Steve Knox

      Re: Responsibility claimed for 8-bit maps

      Well, if you look at the map data copyright in the lower right, it does include Square Enix when in "Quest" mode.

  9. Gannon (J.) Dick
    Black Helicopters

    In all seriousness ...

    Once again, the day after April Fools falls on the second of the month.

    Your Tinfoil Hat can't protect you if you don't wear it. Wake Up, Sheeple!!!

    1. Anonymous Coward
  10. Craig Foster
    Unhappy

    Damn!

    I was hoping for a use for my LaserDisc player :(

  11. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    Losing the Plot and a Nation........ in a very Peculiar Parliamentary Coup with No Vision

    I can think of nothing more quickly and inadequately designed to destroy the puppet charade that is Parliamentary party democracy, along with the respect of a nation for the present Queen which will lead to the rapid crumbling of the House of Windsor should ER indoors be persuaded to take any part in such a fantastic fascist plot, which will also make any ISP unwilling or unable to comply with extremely onerous provision of internet traffic information, a probable target for enhanced state surveillance, as would be the result of that phishy proposal for spooky intervention into everyone's lives not being an excellent April Fools joke, and way over the top of decent good taste.

    It does have one wondering about an Oxford Five hiding in full and transparent sight in the Cabinet Office, hell bent on outdoing the earlier infamous Cambridge team's effort, with a Bullingdon Bombe political cricket attack of their own, which would appear to be somewhat in dishonourable honourable members DNA, by all Wikipedia accounts ........"The Wisden Cricketer reports that the Bullingdon is "ostensibly one of the two original Oxford University cricket teams but it actually used cricket merely as a respectable front for the mischievous, destructive or self-indulgent tendencies of its members"." ......... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bullingdon_Club

    IT just aint cricket though, old bean, is it, to use political office for destroying hoods and nations rather than building them. Such steps are well beyond the crease of crass incompetence and ventures more than just a toe into realms of contrived anarchy and ill-advised personal empire building ..... and that is CHAOS quite beyond normal mortal controls, methinks.

    How about ......... governments offering peoples that which they need to prevent thoughts of conflicts and mayhem, because of their present situation? Is that future production just too intellectually challenging for those reliant upon taxing and the public purse for their existence and continued survival?

    How about the Intelligence Services, both Secret and Security? Is such Future Production, which is also AI and Virtual Reality Promotion and easily delivered nowadays with SMART InterIndependent Networking and Beta IT Projects, beyond their current in-house capabilities too, or do they have an AIMaster Pilot Plan for Special Applications ProgramMING with Crack Virtual Terrain Team Leaders ....... Novel AIPathFinders, already all ready, and already practising stealthy moves, all autonomous and anonymous and astute, on every necessary front?

    A simple ....Yes, we do. ...... is all that is required when true. If that cannot, in all truthfulness, be provided, then obviously would there then be a quite surreal and absolutely fabulous fabless opportunity for any and all Great IT Game Players to provide HyperRadioProActive ProgramMING, and which you can be hereby assured, is no April Fool of a joke.

    And offered now, as it is here, would it cause something of a quandary for governments and intelligence services, should they continue to choose to studiously ignore it , for what would that tell one and all about the present state of their ability and facilities which are/is bound to be a reflection on the suitability of their mentoring and monitoring of future capabilities.

    A little something, El Reg, for Team UKGBNI Shoreditch to Woodstock Venture capitalise for remote spooky ÜberMensch control should government fail to understand and surmount future obvious hurdles?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Losing the Plot and a Nation........ in a very Peculiar Parliamentary Coup with No Vision

      I don't think this will destroy the coalition at all. No, it will be far stronger under the leadership of David Davis who is, after all, the only senior tory who is neither a toff nor pro-snooping.

      He already owns the leadership because he won it first-past-the-post in 2005 and we know how much the Tories believe in the sanctity of FPTP. Cameron only stole victory in the third round of an AV-style election.

    2. KeGoMacK
      Thumb Up

      Re: Losing the Plot and a Nation........ in a very Peculiar Parliamentary Coup with No Vision

      amanfromMars1 for PM, I say!

  12. Grumpy Fellow
    Linux

    Floating Wanda (the Fish)

    Wanda the Fish who has been swimming happily in my Gnome panel for years suddenly was still and floating belly up (not sure a fish has the tits required to go tits-up). When clicked upon, instead of a random fortune, I got a message that the water needed changing. Once into April 2nd, GMT?, she resumed her normal swim. That was scary.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    People don't think things through anymore :(

    Which is my main gripe. Over here in Holland some idiot (personal opinion of course) though it to be fun to construct a sea-bomb (the WW2 thingie) from foam and dump it into a pond. Needless to say; it attracted quite the attention; from police, explosive experts and the lot.

    Call me old fashioned if you will but those aren't jokes anymore. People who are planning a joke should try to think about the consequences. What maybe fun for you might be a nightmare for others.

    And well; to me the jokes are getting lamer, more shallow and plain out dumb by the year. You don't have to overdo it in order to fool people in a fun way you know.

    "OMG, Halleys comet is going to land RIGHT HERE" just doesn't do it these days...

  14. Arctic fox
    Happy

    I have to say that my vote goes to the "ice-age ankle biters".*............

    .........the thought of sabre-tooth lemmings is irresistible, it's so good it ought to be true.

    *Headline from the linked article.

  15. Adam Azarchs

    Toshiba's

    Toshiba's seems to preempt the Apple patent issue.

    1. Ralph B

      I thought that too. Perhaps it also explains why Toshiba's "Oblong" was actually not oblong but oval.

  16. Mike Judge
    IT Angle

    Resistance 3

    Pretty darn cool eastereggs on April 1st.

    Half Life...

  17. Andus McCoatover
    Windows

    Google Tap was my favourite

    I reckon some wag will actually do this! Brilliant!

    https://mail.google.com/mail/help/promos/tap/index.html#tap-features

    1. A J Stiles

      Re: Google Tap was my favourite

      Someone already has ..... the default SMS alert on Nokia phones has been "... -- ..." since I had a 5110.

  18. Andy Miller
    Boffin

    Industry Standards

    Forget these marketing led consumer gadgets. How can you overlook real progress in the industry standards these fripperies are based on?

    The NULL packet http://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc6592

    Service Undiscovery Using Hide-and-Go-Seek for the Domain Pseudonym System (DPS) http://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc6593

  19. Big O

    xkcd posted a variety of different comics - depending on browser/OS/location etc.

    See their forums for some of the variations: http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=82442

    1. Yag

      XKCD...

      This explains why I could not even access their site for the weekend...

    2. AdamWill
      Thumb Up

      xkcd. Yes.

      yes, xkcd wins. no-one else was even in the running.

      there's no 'they', really, when it comes to xkcd, remember. xkcd is Randall. well, he has some logistical support, but he draws all the cartoons.

      he drew a cartoon which expands and shrinks and moves panels around as you resize your browser window. he drew cartoons specific to your browser agent. he drew cartoons specific to particular referrers (going from twitter to xkcd gave a special cartoon, so did going from 4chan to xkcd). he drew cartoons specific to people coming from IP blocks owned by specific companies (Google and Microsoft at least). he drew cartoons specific to particular geographic locations - certain states (california, alaska...), countries (canada, germany (specifically berlin)), even references to very specific tech conferences occurring at the time. it was a freaking herculean effort. there's threads still trying to catalog all the different strips.

      winner, by a country mile.

  20. ChrisM

    Hungry Hippos for IPAD

    I actually want that to happen..

  21. Parax

    Steve Jobs Movie

    Ashton Kutcher to play Steve Jobs

    http://www.variety.com/article/VR1118052143

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Steve Jobs Movie

      Waaaa!? surely this is a joke.. but why is it still being reported.

  22. Stephen 11
    Go

    Another Missed Apil Fools - SkyCMD

    Microsoft thought they would have a go by adding a retro command-line interface for their skydrive service, named skycmd. It has its own website and yes it actually works.

    1. AdamWill

      Re: Another Missed Apil Fools - SkyCMD

      the sad thing is that Microsoft thinks an efficient command line tool is an April Fool's joke...

  23. Daf L

    I thought the Gmail Multitap was awesome!

    Especially the multitasking mode....

    Gmail Tap

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I thought the Gmail Multitap was awesome!

      but they really messed it up.. why two buttons have they never seen a real morse key... One button with time sensitivity, they really could/should have got this right...

      1. Christian Berger

        Re: I thought the Gmail Multitap was awesome!

        Actually you'd think one button would work, however for that you need proper morse keys which aren't just pressed like a button, but moved up and down in a precise manner. I doubt it's possible to emulate that on a touch screen.

        Also there are less experienced operators. They might not get their timing right at decent speeds. So having 3 buttons certainly makes sense.

        They did think that through and it actually is a fairly interesting idea.

        1. Ramiro
          Headmaster

          Re: I thought the Gmail Multitap was awesome!

          I *loved* it. If someone implements this, I *promise* I'll finally learn morse code.

          Can't be more difficult than hiragana/katakana.

  24. fixit_f
    Thumb Up

    GoPro

    http://gopro.com/p/livestock-mount/

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Game

    Was this an April fool, I wouldn't even put these guys chances of survival on the high street as high as HMV's

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-17578451

    1. BoxedSet

      Re: Game

      Hmm perhaps a new oxymoron being born "business sense".... it would seem that it is not, GAME OVER!

      And in other shock news, Apple drops all its current raft of litigation against other companies. No wait......

  26. ADJB

    Gutted about iPad Hungry Hippos....

    being an April fool, I thought that, at last, there was a good reason to buy one.

  27. paulc
    Thumb Up

    iPad Hungry Hippos?

    there's precedent for such a thing...

    http://www.fisher-price.com/fp.aspx?st=2341&e=product&pcat=bulnl&pid=64176

    http://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price-Laugh-Learn-Apptivity-Case/dp/B004UU9W78

  28. plrndl
    Linux

    Computers that do useful work are so 20th century

    My vote goes to Distrowatch for "Gnome 4 Beta".

  29. Identity
    Joke

    You missed

    this missive from EFF:

    View as a web page

    https://supporters.eff.org/civicrm/mailing/view?reset=1&id=169

    EFFector! Electronic Frontier Foundation

    In our 605th issue:

    UPDATES

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    MPAA Announces Kickstarter Campaign for Film Decrying Internet's Impact on Creative Works

    In a statement posted on its Wordpress blog this week, the MPAA announced that it will respond to the Internet's "destructive" effect on creative works with a new PSA, to be funded on the crowd-funding platform Kickstarter. "Rampant content theft -- or as we call it, creativity murder -- makes it impossible to promote ideas online," according to a Tweet from MPAA chairman Chris Dodd. "For a pledge of $50, backers will receive an exclusive DVD copy of 'Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked' in 3D."

    Google's New "Nude View" Program Raises Privacy Concerns

    Privacy advocates are calling foul on a new partnership between Google and the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) that would index the backscatter x-ray images taken at airline security checkpoints. "This will help singles get a first look even before the first date," said a Google spokesman. "Google Nude View," as the program is called, represents the first major initiative for the company since it changed its venerable slogan from "Don't Be Evil" to "Mwahahaha!"

    RIAA, ISPs Introducing New "Hunger Games" Penalties for Infringers

    RIAA chairman Cary Sherman has announced a new agreement between his organization and some of the largest American ISPs that would require subscribers accused of infringement to compete in a televised gladitorial battle to the death. Sherman responded this week to concerns about the severity of the program saying, "Obviously we don't think that all of the infringers selected as tributes should meet their death in the arena. Presumably one of them makes it out alive."

    Patent Office Sued Over Patent on Issuing Patents

    The US Patent and Trademark Office has been forced to halt the issuing of new patents after being sued for violation of patent number #4608919, "System and Method For Granting Limited Monopolies On Inventions."

    Reddit Rolling Out "Real Names of Chuck Norris Only" Policy

    In a misguided attempt to stifle anonymous speech while "preserving the culture" of the service, the popular social site Reddit recently announced it would institute a "real names only" policy that only allows user to select the name Chuck Norris. While we applaud their ingenuity in avoiding the pitfalls other sites have encountered in determining what does or doesn't look like a "real" name, we remain concerned over the closure of another venue for pseudonymous speech.

    New Zealand Leaks New IP Chapter of TPP, Includes Mandate to Give All Alleged Copyright Infringers Free Puppies

    The leaked draft of the Trans-Pacific Partnership has not been confirmed by the negotiating parties, but a highly-placed source claims to have overheard the US Trade Representative saying, "Who wouldn't want to snuggle with a puppy while watching their pirated copy of Season 1 Game of Thrones?"

    EFF Issues New Guidelines for Mobile Privacy

    A new whitepaper on mobile privacy, co-authored by Technology Projects Director Peter Eckersley and Activism Director Rainey Reitman, is one of the most concise yet published by EFF. Titled "Protecting Your Privacy in the Mobile Era," the report consists entirely of the five words "Don't use a mobile phone." This complements EFF's 1991 report: "Don't use electronic mail."

    Job Seekers Getting Asked for Farmville Passwords

    In an alarming trend, job seekers are increasingly reporting that prospective employers are requiring Farmville passwords or "neighbor" requests from prospective employees. One job seeker, speaking on the condition of anonymity, expressed serious privacy concerns about the trend: "My virtual crops and livestock are sensitive information, and none of my boss' business. I think he's just looking for somebody to harvest his tomatoes."

    Karaoke Machine Vendors Must Adhere to "Know Your Customer" Policies

    EFF calls on karaoke machine vendors to "know their customer" when selling equipment to governments and the very drunk. While karaoke is "dual use" technology and may be used for legitimate purposes, EFF condemns its use by oppressive over-singers, divas, and Journey fans.

    miniLinks

    Researchers discover critical flaw in snowflake generation algorithm

    Security researchers at the McMurdo research station in Antarctica have published alarming results about insufficient randomness in the generation of new snowflakes. As many as 2 in every 1000 snowflakes is reported to be neither beautiful nor unique.

    Bruce Schneier develops security system so clever he can't imagine a way of breaking it

    In a nod to his eponymous law, security expert Bruce Schneier has reportedly developed an encryption technique that is so clever that even Bruce Schneier can't figure out how to break it.

    Drones: Drones, drones drones, drones?

    In drones today, drones drones droney droney drones. According to EFF Activist Trevor Timm, "Drones and drones drone droney drone drone. And nanodrones."

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  30. Jamie Kitson

    Jessops

    A friend just showed me an email he had from Jessops, advertising a maglev tripod. It fooled my friend and I'm impressed that Jessops have a sense of humour :)

    http://www.amateurphotographer.co.uk/news/Jessops_in_hover_tripod_April_Fools_prank_news_312061.html

    1. Jamie Kitson

      Re: Jessops

      And on a similar subject, this one from PhotoBox:

      http://m.my.email-photobox.co.uk/nl/jsp/m.jsp?c=968cddd0973b1bccc9

  31. Jamie Kitson

    Re: Jessops

    Better link: http://mirror.newsletter.jessops.com/nl/jsp/m.jsp?c=82c9cfc2620969c7b3

  32. Jack
    Thumb Up

    Blizzard's New Educational Software Line!

    Bliz always has the best pranks.

    Reader Ravager!

    Where in Sanctuary is Deckard Cain? (rated M of mature)

    Working demos included. http://us.blizzard.com/en-us/games/blizzkidzz/

    Happy 1st!

  33. Primus Secundus Tertius

    Banksters Apologies

    I liked the report below in the Sunday Telegraph:

    City agrees to lead 'Day of Sorrow’ over financial crisis

    Pat Diemu

    12:01AM BST 01 Apr 2012

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What about Kodak's new Liveprint?

    Live kittens in minutes!

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