back to article Android users more likely to put out

Android users are more likely to be slutty, it transpires – having more one night stands, signing up to dating sites more often and being more likely to have sex on a first date, according to a Match.com survey of single Canadian mobile users. The figures are a dramatic reworking of previous research in the area that suggested …

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  1. Cameron Colley
    FAIL

    "even more reliable than a starsign.?

    So, a fraction of a percentage point above chance then? Wow, how absolutely amazing.

    1. Just Thinking

      Why slag off astrology? There are plenty of otherwise intelligent people who hold some very specific beliefs about what some god or other wants them to do. Wear a silly hat, don't do any work on some particular day of the week, etc. Can't see a huge amount of difference.

      1. Bassey

        Re: why slag off astrology

        I don't see why astrology being just like several other ludicrous belief systems is a reason NOT to slag it off. You're going to have to explain your reasoning on that one.

        1. Just Thinking

          I just think they get a relatively bad press. You don't see Russell Grant being given an automatic seat in the house of lords so he can impose his belief system on the rest of us.

          1. auburnman
            Angel

            So if we spread the heckling more evenly among the lunatics we're okay?

        2. Mediocrates
          Devil

          Do NOT slag off Astrology!

          It's self-help for people who have given up on free will.

      2. Cameron Colley

        @ Just Thinking

        I'm not slagging anything off -- astrology can be a fun source of entertainment. If you care to produce a scientific study which gives a better than chance predictive rate for it I'll up my figures accordingly.

        I also never mentioned any other beleif since the article didn't either, or should I have mentioned that I don't think a teapot exists between the earth and the moon just for BBC style "ballance"?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          I've always wondered if there mightn't have been something to astrology / similar systems in the past.

          When we were more subject to the effects of the seasons you can imagine it making a difference to a child's development if it was gestated when food was plentiful, started walking when the weather was good enough to be outside all the time, started 'proper' talking when more adults were inside sheltering rather than working - could almost believe that sort of thing might produce predictable differences in physical and mental attributes to people born at particular times of year.

          Obviously these days those sort of things don't apply and so it's definitely in the group of scamming-the-gullible-entertaining-the-frivolous activities along with Santa / Satan etc

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Agreed

            comment body

          2. Wize

            Yea, its all real

            The same thing happens to 1/12 of the population all the time...

            I've overheard the following conversation:

            A: (while reading paper) What star sign are you?

            B: Leo

            A: Your horiscope for today says blah blah blah

            B: Yea, all of that happened to me today

            A: Ops, sorry, that was for Taurus.

            Some people just want to believe and make things fit.

          3. Bassey

            Re I've always wondered if.......

            "When we were more subject to the effects of the seasons you can imagine it making a difference to a child's development"

            This is still the case and has been shown in many studies. Children born in July/August do MUCH worse than children born in Sept/Oct. They also have a higher incidence of suicide (about 10% higher which is ENORMOUS). But, of course, this has nothing to do with the position of the planets. It is down to the Western Education system being based around a school calendar year rather than the absolute age of the child. So a child born at the end of August is almost a year younger when they start school than a child born at the start of September. This makes a huge difference to how they start learning which has a correspondingly large knock-on effect later in life.

            Due to their poorer results, poorer job, less money etc they are more likely to suffer anxiety/depression and go on to harm themselves.

            But that STILL doesn't mean there is ANYTHING to astrology.

            It just proves that society is slightly biased towards a particular date of birth.

    2. Filippo Silver badge

      Astrology isn't exactly chance - if one believes in it hard enough, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Of course, it's still bullshit, but beliefs have a measurable effect regardless of whether they're true. That's part of why they're so hard to get rid of.

  2. Stuart 22
    Unhappy

    I've had three Android phones, and two Android fondleslabs. None of these has improved my sex life. Indeed catching up with iPlayer in bed has decreased opportunity markedly.

    Can I have my money back ? Am I alone or can we make this a class action claim?

    1. Ian Yates
      Joke

      You must be holding it wrong

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Have you tried joining more dating websites as the article suggests?

      1. Stuart 22
        Unhappy

        I chose Android 'cos I'm a freetard. Pay to meet? Might be mistaken for a fanboi ...

    3. Mark 65

      @Stuart 22

      I thought the article indicated that Android users were more likely to be "easy", thus the fact it hasn't improved your sex life is perhaps an indication of your "desirability"?

  3. Arnold Lieberman
    Unhappy

    Symbian (l)users?

    I guess we just disappear below the noise floor.

    1. Khaptain Silver badge
      Joke

      Slight spelling error

      You did mean "sybian" didn't you......

      1. Arnold Lieberman
        Meh

        Let me sit on that one for a while

        Is it Anna or Belle?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So which one

    should a young British lesbian pick?

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge

      Windows Phone 7?

    2. Jedit Silver badge
      Joke

      Best phone for a young British lesbian?

      The one with the strongest haptic feedback, obviously.

      Real conversation overheard in Tesco's phone section:

      "It says this phone is exciting. Should I be excited by my phone?"

      "Dunno - is it set to vibrate?"

    3. Doug Glass
      Go

      iTongue

  5. Big O
    Thumb Up

    I love the tone in articles like this. Excellent distraction from work...... right, what's next?

    What do you mean 'work'?

    1. Gordon 10

      Indeed

      "She has a masters."

      I rofl'd.

  6. Colin Wilson 2

    Madeira m'dear?

    Android users more likely to put out...

    ... the cat, the wine, their cigars or the lamps?

  7. George Nacht
    Holmes

    Sex on first date, well...

    I am sure a dozen people before me already said it, but is there an app to discern those "more slutty" from "more braggy"?

  8. Jash
    Paris Hilton

    Apples and Oranges

    Based on past research covered on El Reg, I was of the belief that Apple users got more!

    http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/08/11/iphone_users_getting_more/

    So taking this into Account, does it mean theres a fruity-droid love-fest going on, with Apple users getting more, from the Android users who put out more?!

    Surely if you put out more, your getting more?

    Paris obviously uses both...

    1. Old Handle
      Boffin

      Confounding Factors

      I suspect the difference is that they other "study" (if either of these are worthy of that term) controlled for age and sex, by only including 30-year-olds and putting men and women in separate groups. This one, as far as I can tell, did not.

      Either is a valid way to look at it I suppose, depending on what exactly you're trying to measure.

    2. Kudos.
      Meh

      You're quite right, just 'putting out' is a more negative way of saying 'getting some' possibly to reflect the way that the author feels about each brand.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Perhaps

        it was weighted for different practices, and Apple users are more likely to take it up the ar*e, just out of sheer habit?

    3. Wize

      The iPad users have stopped going out since...

      ...their latest attachment came out

      http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/01/26/ipad_fleshlight_design/

  9. Bodger
    Devil

    She has a masters

    Great now when people ask what phone they should get. I can retort it depends, do you put out?

  10. Robin Baker

    So that explains

    why, since I have had my Blackberry, I haven`t struck lucky at all.

    Where can I get a blow-up android from??

    1. Richard Wharram

      Blackberries

      in my experience the only people I see using Blackberries are 12 year old girls so I guess potential dates view you as either clueless or Glitter-esque.

      Just saying.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      A lot of bankers use Blackberries.

  11. This post has been deleted by its author

  12. A. Nervosa
    Happy

    So...

    Android users are cheap, in more ways than one.

    No news there, then.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      lack of respect

      ...and no one would respect them after, because they own an Android ;)

    2. Drew V.
      Joke

      It's undeniable...

      ...that most of them have a habit of blatantly exposing their private information to the Chocolate Factory in a fairly sluttish, skanky manner. "Ooooh, rifle through my data some more with your algorithms, Mr. Wonka-Donka-Donka..."

  13. xyz Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    there are much better sites out there...

    benaughty and adultfriendfinder spring to mind.....it's impossible not to pull (for nefarious reasons) on them. Why go through all that wining and dining stuff with an evens chance (tops) of getting your leg over on Match, when you can just select'n'bonk on the other sites? No one gives a rats' ass what phone you have either.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    ... the Canadian psychotherapist-cum-"dating expert" ...

    Interesting image.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      You've got to think that's a very specific dating preference.

      Does it taste of maple syrup?

    2. Someone Else Silver badge

      Isn't that what the El Reg-ers refer to as a "trick cyclist" (or something like that)?

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      yeah

      Did she have to go somewhere special to train for that?

  15. John A Blackley

    Let us not forget

    We're talking about Canadians here.

    Results are skewed as there's little else to do in Canada.

    1. Darryl

      HEY!

      There's hockey

      And, er, Snow Shovelling

      And... oh, whatever.

      Anyways, I do love the line "perhaps because they all work in graphic design and don't have any real work to do."

  16. Alex C

    between the two bit's of research...

    A lot of users have moved from Apple to Android.

    We can deduce from the research that these are people with somewhat slutty tendencies have moved from Apple to Android. It is surprising that people with slutty tendencies will move brands when something better comes along? Thought not.

    1. John I'm only dancing

      Being pedantic, no you can't

      They only quote percentages.. 55% is greater than 50% when the total is equal, but 55% of 100 users is less than 50% of 1,000.

      1. Alex C

        Fair enough

        You're quite right, of course.

        The point - however ham-fistedly made - is that given the two bits of research say similar things but a few years apart, and that the major difference between the two times is that a lot of people have deserted Apple (though technically I think more have left from non-smart phones etc), I suggested that it was the sluttier ones who'd left.

        I raised that point instead of my initial thoughts that the whole research is bunkum, only because I enjoyed it more. Some people put out on the first date, some people own one form of smartphone. That there is a temproary correlation is neither here nor there - the whole point of the survey is nonsense. There might be a thousand reasons they got those results entirely unrelated to the questions asked. With no prior knowledge whatever I'd guess that they got responses from a higher proportion of men than women. What proportion of men are unwilling to put out on the first date?

        Lies, Damn Lies and Statistics.

        Cheers anyway.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I think I know why the crackberries are so low

    Just had an office email saying a Blackberry curve has been found. I think it might be that there are no straight blackberries. Does Match only cater for one type of date?

  18. Arbuthnot Darjeeling
    Paris Hilton

    android user

    non smoker own home gsoh solvent

    seeks similar for ltr (whole weekend)

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is that

    an android in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Were they all Galaxy Note owners over compensating for something

  21. Doogie1
    Happy

    It's probably a lack of self esteem that makes them do it. Buy an Android that is!

  22. admiraljkb
    Joke

    Maybe there was a misinterpretation, heh?

    Since many Droid phones have NFC, maybe the sample study said they bumped uglies (phones) at the end of the date, when all they were doing was exchanging contact info? ;) muhahahaha

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Throwing my own coat at you!

      :p

  23. The Indomitable Gall

    Loving the jokes, but being serious....

    One thing i notice is that they are talking about percentages of "users" -- a single figure.

    But one thing we know from surveys of sexual habits is that guys always come out more loose than women. In fact, I don't think there's been a single survey where the amount of sex men have doesn't seriously outweigh the amount of sex woman have. So the question is: is there a gender bias in the samples? Or in other words, do more guys use Android?

    1. Velv
      Joke

      Or ignoring the possibility of bias on sampling, perhaps the amount of sex men have is substantially higher than the amount of sex females have. Men having sex doesn't necessarily require a woman to be in the room (there may be more or less homesexual activity than some are willing to admit to).

      And sex is a bit like oxygen - you don't really give it a second thought until you're not getting any.

  24. Dana W
    Trollface

    I just assumed it was that so many Android users are teenagers.

  25. Shaun 1

    And more likely to be riddled with virii?

  26. Graham Bartlett

    @The Indomitable Gall

    Assuming the participants are straight, the number of men and women participating in sex is going to be equal, isn't it? How much either party gets from the experience is another matter, of course.

    What the stats do say is that the statistical deviation (oh dear) of promiscuity amongst men is greater than amongst women. It's the old "average" problem. For women, the median and mode will both be fairly close, but a few extremely-high outliers on the male side pull the mean value a long way from the (lower) mode.

  27. Kudos.
    Facepalm

    Reporting bias

    It's good that we've got an article that contradicts another one which claimed iPhone users were more promiscuous.

    Interesting then that one headline read like "iPhone users get more" and other "Android users are slags"

  28. AndrueC Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Well I'm clearly not using my phone properly then. The only thing that's come on to me recently is my damn budgie.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Keep your phone in your pants..

    ..where it belongs.

    You do get more eye contact when you're not looking at your phone.

  30. Wize

    All just coincidence

    A Simpson's quote I posted on another thread recently...

    "Did you know that there's a direct correlation between the decline of Spirograph and the rise in gang activity?"

    Maybe its got nothing to do with it.

    Are we going to see studies on how you eat a jelly baby as a kid influences your likelihood of having a noisy neighbour later in life?

    Actually, there could be a nice big grant in that one. There have been studies linking psychological profiles to jelly baby eating, which could then lead to what area you move to etc. And as its a long term study, they won't expect results for their cash for many years.

    However, it comes with the danger of people not understanding why you are offering children sweeties and getting them to stay in touch...

  31. gerryg
    Paris Hilton

    you've all disappointed me...

    I was expecting so much more to made from "psychotherapist-cum-"dating expert" " how far does an El Reg journalist have to go these days? Put out? I would be.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Complete rubbish

    The survey is completely wrong. I can personally attest, from my experience of a mid-life single period, that almost 100% of women put out on the first date to a guy who uses MS-DOS and has a brick-shaped phone that goes "ring ring".

    AC in self defense, since my single days are behind me.

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "She has a masters..."

    And I have a Johnson.

    Hnur hnur hnur.

  34. ChrisInAStrangeLand
    FAIL

    s/correlation/causation

    Men are more likely to exaggerate their sexual prowess than women. iPhones also have slightly higher adoption amongst women.

  35. magmumus
    Thumb Up

    psychotherapist-CUM-"dating" --> nice touch

  36. Cunningly Linguistic
    Paris Hilton

    Huh

    I put out on the first date regardless of the phone I have in my pocket!

  37. Doug Glass
    Go

    To an Apple product user this is all a wrong. Just using the iPod, iPad, iPhone or whatever IS sex to a follower of The Sacred J.

  38. mhenriday
    Pint

    «She [Kimberly Moffit] has a masters.»

    Good for her ! She's obviously made use of her academic credentials to both make money and get into the public eye, which our economist friends tell us is the be all and end all of higher studies. A true citizen of the modern world !...

    Henri

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